Slashdot Mirror
13 Things That Do Not Make Sense
thpr writes "New Scientist is reporting on 13 things which do not make sense. It's an interesting article about 13 areas in which observations do not line up with current theory. From the placebo effect to dark matter, it's a list of areas in need of additional research. Explanations could lead to significant breakthroughs... or at least new and different errors in scientific observations. Now there are 20 interesting problems for Slashdotters to work on, once you combine these with the seven Millennium Problems!"
There was a study not that long ago that concluded that the placebo effect doesn't really exist. How did they test that? Did they give some patients a placebo, and others (the control group) a fake placebo?
Ladies and gentlemen of the supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider: this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk, but Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now, think about that. That does not make sense! Why would a Wookiee -- an eight foot tall Wookiee -- want to live on Endor with a bunch of two foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more importantly, you have to ask yourself: what does that have to do with science? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with science! It does not make sense! Look at me, I'm posting on slashdot in response to an article about science, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca. Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense. None of this makes sense. And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberating and conjugating the Emancipation Proclamation... does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense. If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests
Great, then I will have to tell my boss I was missing for a couple of days because I thought I was on a bender.
Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
What truth?
There is no dupe
Just great, like I really needed 13 more things to worry about.
Hey, why wasn't my wife on that list?
I have emough thimgs that dom't nake semse im ny life so as to worry about that. For exanple, why the fuck does ny keyboard type "n" whem I clearly hit the "m" ke... wait, mvn... forgot to put the keys back right. Okay, i'll give those problems a whirl now.
I'm a signature virus. Please copy me to your signature so I can replicate.
They should probably just use air in the syringes, then.
I guess I might as well buy those enlargement pills after all.
Hey, you never know...
Such as this comment...
Look at this monkey.... [Head asplode] That does not make sense.
I actually tested this theory one day. I dressed like a whigger (backwards baseball cap and all) and started talking to your typical overdone-tan chick at the mall and after an hour she was wanting me to come and hang out with her. Then I was like, "No, I'm actually a nerd. I just wanted to prove something. Sorry."
Job? I don't have time to get a job! Who will sit around and bitch about being broke and unemployed then?
So... You're an even bigger asshole than you were pretending to be. Is there a bell curve here? Is there an optimum level of asshole-ness?
Yeah, that's what I see. I see there are two types of guys in a lot of women's eyes. The kind you fuck and the kind you go crying to when you can't get to a guy you fuck. The later type is also the one you put in charge of fixing your car, raising your kids, and providing general emotional support.
Job? I don't have time to get a job! Who will sit around and bitch about being broke and unemployed then?
1) take a slashdot comment
2) reply to it
3) reply to the reply
4) each reply containing less information and insight
5) ????
6) profit!
The final comment still has the same amazing powes of useless drivel the first had.
Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
Right... He didnt notice it was water? what were you mixing it with? Wasabi?
We got a whole group of chicks drunk this way... and did them afterwards. Was a blast telling them that they weren't really drunk....
You know, jobs in the science would really open up if we started burning heretics again.
#1 Skill for a successful career in science: Try not to look flammable.
Democrats or Republicans. They are both taking us to the same place and they are not afraid of us anymore.
I actually tested this theory one day. I dressed like a whigger (backwards baseball cap and all) and started talking to your typical overdone-tan chick at the mall and after an hour she was wanting me to come and hang out with her. Then I was like, "No, I'm actually a nerd. I just wanted to prove something. Sorry."
note: may not have happened
girls like dicks.
Work Safe Porn
1977, it was called the Wow! signal.
2005, it would have been the WTF! OMG! LEET! signal.
bash$
Hey, have you heard about Placebo Domingo, Placido's younger brother? He looks just like his brother and gets great press, but he actually can't sing worth a damn.
Heh heh. Hoo, tough crowd tonight...
Sheesh, what a stupid bitch.
Oh wait, now she's likes me...
"I only speak the truth"
Karma: null(Mostly affected by an unassigned variable)
I think I'm getting morphine... I think I'm getting morphine... I think I'm getting morphine...
Shit, nothing!
You, sir, went to a kinder, gentler, college than I did.
I don't know... White blood cells that believe in homeopathy? They sound pretty stupid to me.
how come MS Windows did not make it. ;)
One would expect cosmologists to jump for joy at their luck. (And among those whom I know, everyone does!)
Among the cosmologists I know, they break out in hedonistic orgies when they find something new.
Oh, wait.
All the cosmologists I know personally are imaginary.
The answer to all of these questions is obvious: Jesus did it.
My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.
If she doesn't like something I say or do, she'll make sure I know straight away...
Run.
Very fast.
Do not look back.
Girls