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Black Holes 'Do Not Exist,' Contends Physicist

SpaceAdmiral writes "Nature reports that, according to a physicist at the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California, 'It's a near certainty that black holes don't exist.' George Chapline argues that the collapse of massive stars is more likely to lead to dark energy stars. These dark energy stars behave somewhat like a black hole outside of the surface, but the negative gravity inside could cause matter to 'bounce back out again.'"

50 of 759 comments (clear)

  1. I don't Believe it! by Ian+McBeth · · Score: 2, Funny

    I've been fooled by Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock all these years. DOH!

    1. Re:I don't Believe it! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      I've been fooled by Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock all these years. DOH!

      You mean they told you that they loved you, but it turned out they were just using you for sex?

    2. Re:I don't Believe it! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      What has that got to do with a black h-- oh. Oh god.

  2. Sure sure... by kneecarrot · · Score: 2, Funny

    And I guess you are going to tell me that fairies don't exist next, right? Wake up and smell the coffee, my friend.

    --

    I always save my last mod point to mod up a good troll. You people are too serious.

  3. Yeah maybe... buttt... by sandstorming · · Score: 5, Funny

    Theres always someone who has a diferent theory.

    On the other hand though...
    Tell someone there are a million stars in the sky and they'll believe you...
    Tell them paint is wet and...

    1. Re:Yeah maybe... buttt... by Dante+Shamest · · Score: 2, Funny
      Tell someone there are a million stars in the sky and they'll believe you...

      ...I don't.

      Tell them paint is wet and...

      ...I avoid it.

  4. Re:Paradigm shift by kneecarrot · · Score: 2, Funny

    Please don't use the word "paradigm shift". It could cause another .com implosion.

    --

    I always save my last mod point to mod up a good troll. You people are too serious.

  5. Re:lol by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I contend that ass holes don't exist!

    Oh yeah? Proof by contradiction; you.

  6. Oh it's on now by jayhawk88 · · Score: 5, Funny

    You know MC Hawking isn't going to stand for this shit.

    1. Re:Oh it's on now by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      You know MC Hawking isn't going to stand for this shit.

      Duh... he is in a wheelchair dude.

    2. Re:Oh it's on now by Dulimano · · Score: 2, Funny

      Don't fuck with the Hawkman, 'cause the Hawkman ain't down with that eye for an eye bullshit.
      Fuck that! You take an eye and I'll take your motherfucking head!

      (From "All My Shootin's Be Drivebys" by MC Hawking)

  7. picture by elgatozorbas · · Score: 4, Funny
    These dark energy stars behave somewhat like a blackhole outside of the surface

    Apparently they look something like this

  8. Re:Coffee fairies? by mmkkbb · · Score: 2, Funny

    FACT: while my girlfriend was working at starbucks, every one of her male coworkers was gay.

    --
    -mkb
  9. How to Prove/Disprove? by Cruithne · · Score: 2, Funny

    The odd thing is... it will be quite impossible to prove or disprove this either way for... quite a long time.

    At least until a space cruise ship christened the "Titanic" gets too close to that blackish.. hole-ish thing while taking a shortcut, in about a thousand years.

  10. Re:Good one by Masami+Eiri · · Score: 2, Funny

    It would have been easier to say "torroid pieces of dough"....

  11. The Monday after daylight savings? by CompWerks · · Score: 5, Funny
    You've got to be kidding, It's way to early for this.

    --
    If you can read this sig - the bitch fell off.
  12. Neat by quaketripp · · Score: 2, Funny

    Before, I had the chance of getting sucked through a blackhole and spit out into a sister universe in some array of energy and mass, but, now I get bounced back in the form of Positron? Sweet. Then I acquire the Autobot Matrix of Leadership, and destruction of the Decepticons will be for sure! But seriously, I think this guy just has a vendetta against Rush for writing a song about Cygnus X-1.

  13. timetravel? by FlashBuster3000 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Uhm, and how do i travel through time without black holes? Explain this!

  14. Re:Paradigm shift by BioCS.Nerd · · Score: 3, Funny

    "but I still wouldn't want to be near a collapsing star.." Man, tell me about it. I hate to be anywhere near Lindsay Lohan in a few months...

  15. Re:Good one by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yes, or to make it more accessible, instead of "torroid" you could say "doughnut-shaped."

  16. What next? by untaken_name · · Score: 5, Funny

    You going to tell me that Terra isn't flat? That the humours don't control disease? That there are no dragons off the edge of the map? Puh-leeze.

    This is why I make it a point to never listen to scientists. They change their minds too often. You'd think women would dominate science, considering their natural talents in that area.

  17. Re:The actual article by MouseR · · Score: 4, Funny

    Four fucking pages?!? The guy claims to comprehensively contradict some of the best known and most studied concepts in astro-physics, and his proof covers FOUR PAGES? And contains almost no equations?

    The guy's not even crippled!

  18. Gravity does not exist! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    The earth sucks. QED

  19. Re:The actual article by kfg · · Score: 2, Funny

    Have you ever seen a black hole?

    I wasted my Saturday night in one.

    KFG

  20. Re:Dark BS by Da+Fokka · · Score: 2, Funny

    George Chapline just called. Because he feared being on your dreadful 'quack' list, he retracted his theory.

  21. Re:The actual article by at_slashdot · · Score: 4, Funny

    I like your quantitative approach in establishing the scientific truth.

    --
    "It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." -- Prof. Dumbledore
  22. Re:Coffee fairies? by popeyethesailor · · Score: 5, Funny

    That's what they wanted you to think :P

  23. Re:Coffee fairies? by smallguy78 · · Score: 2, Funny

    or that's what she told you, when you caught her in bed with one of them. Wake up and smell the coffee my friend

    --
    Nothing costs nothing
  24. Clarity by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny


    Murky words, misspelled
    Dark matter stars shed no light
    Are we enlightened?

  25. Re:The actual article by shawn(at)fsu · · Score: 2, Funny

    Ah yes the Babble fish argument, yes very powerfull, just like the wookie defence.

    --
    500 dollar reward for tip(s) leading to the arrest of the person(s) who stole my sig.
  26. Re:The actual article by mattspammail · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yes, I saw The Black Hole. Maximillian was the robot, and there was an evil scientist too. The black hole itself was totally visible from their space ship. Intense movie (for a 7 year old).

    --
    Now accepting PayPal donations!
  27. Re:And what else..? by VoidPoint · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yes indeed, black is out. Grey is the new black. So, I suspect he's actually proposing grey holes? Or is it all grey matter?

  28. Re:The actual article by helfen · · Score: 2, Funny

    Four fucking pages?!? The guy claims to comprehensively contradict some of the best known and most studied concepts in astro-physics, and his proof covers FOUR PAGES? And contains almost no equations?

    You must be new here.

  29. Re:Wasted Brain Cells by demondawn · · Score: 2, Funny

    The University of Colorado's non-science-major course on Black Holes, ASTR 2030 (which I'm headed to in about 5 minutes), shows portions of Disney's "The Black Hole", citing it as "How Not To Make A Movie About Black Holes". A survey of "potential villians" at the beginning of class led to a near unanimous first response of "the composer".

  30. Re:lol by zakezuke · · Score: 3, Funny

    I contend that ass holes don't exist!

    Would this be a situation where one can link to goatex and have it actually be Informative?

    --
    There is no sanctuary. There is no sanctuary. SHUT UP! There is no shut up. There is no shut up.
  31. Re:The actual article by ultranova · · Score: 4, Funny

    Have you ever seen a black hole?

    Yes, one followed me around and often ate my homework when I was in school.

    --

    Forget magic. Any technology distinguishable from divine power is insufficiently advanced.

  32. Re:Argh! by Stoutlimb · · Score: 3, Funny

    Layperson doesn't understand the cutting edge of physics and math. So they must be bozos.

    I can forgive you that you might not be up on the latest theories flying around the theoretical physics community. Really, I can.

    But what kind of idiot are you that you don't understand the basic process of science??? Were you raised in the bible belt, and homeschooled on creationism??? Did you sleep through grade school science class???

    Scientists put forward theories. Lots of them. Many are wrong. Those get disproven. The correct ones win, and then can get replaced by theories that are even closer to the truth.
    On the cutting edge of knowlege, it's a normal and necessary part of the process to see many theories bouncing about at the same time. The point is that even the wrong ideas help us get closer to the right one.

    Please blame this on Monday. Cause if you can't, you might have to face the fact that you're not just a layperson, but a really dumb one.

  33. All it means... by jd · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...is that the Professor who had the bet with Hawking over Black Holes has to give his year's subscription to Penthouse back.

    --
    It's a small world and it smells funny; I'd buy another if it wasn't for the money; Take back what I paid (SoM)
  34. Re:The actual article by Moofie · · Score: 4, Funny

    No no no, you're being silly. They LOOK like black holes, they BEHAVE like black holes, they are in all ways indistinguishable from black holes, but they're really cosmic space ducks.

    Silly Buttons.

    --
    Why yes, I AM a rocket scientist!
  35. Black holes by xXunderdogXx · · Score: 2, Funny

    We know of at least one black hole whose existence has been repeatedly verified by unsuspecting eyes: Goatse.

  36. Obligatory... by yourruinreverse · · Score: 2, Funny

    "The first thing to realize about black holes, [yourruinreverse] says, is that they are not black.\nIt is also important to realize that they are not, strictly speaking, holes either, but it is easiest if you don't try to realize that until a little later, after you've realized that everything you've realized up to that moment is not true."

    [Adapted from Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless]

    --
    JeR
  37. Kirk and Spock Used Me by handy_vandal · · Score: 4, Funny

    You mean they told you that they loved you, but it turned out they were just using you for sex?

    More or less. I guess I should have figured it out for myself ...

    -- Kirk kept shouting, "Oh Janice, oh Janice!"

    -- Spock only did it every seven years.

    -kgj

    --
    -kgj
  38. Re:The actual article by aiabx · · Score: 4, Funny

    Ob. Bugs Bunny:
    "The earth, she's a round like a orange."
    "She's flat like a pancake."
    "No, she's round like my head."
    *WHAM*
    "She's flat like your head."

    I wonder that the flat earth people never picked up on the post-hit-with-a-mallet-head shape; it solves the problem of round eclipses, and still gives you a flat edge to fall off of.
    -aiabx

    --
    Just this guy, you know?
  39. Re:The actual article by HermDog · · Score: 3, Funny
    almost no equations
    I guess he didn't know he was supposed to show his work.

    I just have to ask: If you believe there is no blackhole, does that make you an aholist?

    --
    JADBP
  40. Really now. by cno3 · · Score: 1, Funny

    Wouldn't it be so much easier for y'all to just admit that God made everything, and that Jesus is shootin' around up there like the Silver Surfer, pickin' up all the broken bits? ;)

  41. Re:The actual article by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    If teaching you that plurals don't take apostrophes, then yes, common knowledge would be informative.

  42. Re:Argh! by Stoutlimb · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Like it or not, people expect science to be exact and correct even though it often isn't."

    You are right. That is what religion is for. ;)

    -

  43. maybe 5 was even to begin with by pyrrho · · Score: 2, Funny

    and that was the error.

    --

    -pyrrho

  44. The bastard! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    He should at least be forced to go over to Hawking's house and hold the pictures up for him.

  45. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 3, Funny

    Comment removed based on user account deletion