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Kevin Smith Previews Revenge of the Sith
Eugenia writes "Kevin Smith, the well-known actor/director, was invited by George Lucas to a special advanced screening of the upcoming 'Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith' film and he wrote down his take on the movie. There are some serious spoilers in his article but it's interesting to see his reaction, as a director and Star Wars fan."
Is that Lucas serves his popcorn without butter. I mean... what the hell?
Anakin becomes Darth Vader! (GASP)
This is not the story you're looking for. Move along.
In Soviet Rush, today's Tom Sawyer gets high on you.
I can't trust a review from someone who constantly casts Ben Affleck.
That the movie is dark, Dark, darK, DARK..DARK..DARK!!
I hope it aint so dark as not to see its flaws!
*ducks*
Rapid Nirvana
"SITH" SPOILERS
You've been warned...
- "Revenge of the Sith" is, quite simply, fucking awesome.
[Spoilers removed]
"Sith" doesn't happen; "Sith" rules.
The poor View Askew web server. I bet it's probably thinking to itself, "I'm not even supposed to be here today."
You are the C.L.I.T. commander!
So do they remove R2D2's thrusters that allow him to fly around too?
I Am My Own Worst Enemy
Somebody should turn up the gamma, then.
after cutting his legs and arm off, Ben leaves Skywalker burning alive on the shores of a lava river, with Anakin spitting venomous sentiments at his departing mentor
Anakin: None shall pass.
Obi Wan: What?
Anakin: None shall pass.
Obi Wan: I have no quarrel with you, young padiwan, but I must cross this bridge.
Anakin: Then you shall die.
Obi Wan: I command you as your teacher to stand aside!
Anakin: I move for no man.
Obi Wan: So be it!
Obi Wan cuts off Anakin's left arm.
Obi Wan: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
Anakin: 'Tis but a scratch.
Obi Wan: A scratch? Your arm's off!
Anakin: No, it isn't.
Obi Wan: Well, what's that then?
Anakin: I've had worse.
Obi Wan: You liar!
Anakin: Come on you pansy!
Obi Wan cuts off Anakin's right arm.
Obi Wan: Victory is mine! We thank thee Force, that in thy mercy...
Anakin: Come on then.
Obi Wan: What?
Anakin: Have at you!
Obi Wan: You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine.
Anakin: Oh, had enough, eh?
Obi Wan: Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left.
Anakin: Yes I have.
Obi Wan: Look!
Anakin: Just a flesh wound.
Obi Wan: Look, stop that.
Anakin: Chicken! Chicken!
Obi Wan: Look, I'll have your leg. Right!
Obi Wan cuts off Anakin's leg.
Anakin: Right, I'll do you for that!
Obi Wan: You'll what?
Anakin: Come 'ere!
Obi Wan: What are you going to do, bleed on me?
Anakin: I'm invincible!
Obi Wan: You're a loony.
Anakin: The Dark Side always triumphs! Have at you! Come on then.
Obi Wan cuts off Anakin's other leg.
Anakin: All right; we'll call it a draw.
Obi Wan: Come, Patsy.
Anakin: Oh, oh, I see, running away then. You yellow bastard! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!
They also revealed that Luke and Leia's kid (remember their kiss), turned into a bad guy in a similar way that Anakin did; and this kid decided to whitewash history; and had all the records changed that reflected poorly on his daddy's friends. In that editing of history, Han's history was changed.
Tell her to give birth in the theatre and then she'll give birth to a jedi....
(mind you, the green skin coloring, pointy ears and dimunitive side will be rather permanent unlike most infants he shall not grow much taller)
...was when George turned to Kevin and said "I am your father."
Coder's Stone: The programming language quick ref for iPad
In "Site", I hear they added some new dialog after Kevin saw it... "Yo, Anakin...show your metal face." ...and BAM, he turns to the darkside...
Then he sings to Padme..."Your love is like a bleeding heart, Darth VA-DER!"
Bet it'll still suck.
> My wife is due
Your wife is due? Is the a pre-arranged marriage or something? Arranged WAY in advance!
Oh, you mean your baby is due...
never mind...
- For the complete works of Shakespeare: cat
And god love you for it. I'm right there with you.
the major advances in civilization are processes which all but wreck the societies in which they occur - A.N. White
Will you name the baby Luke or Leia?
My evaluation? The movie excellent, the post-parody so so, I have better dialogs as Silent Bob.
-Kevin Smith
I'm with you.
If one day my curiosity gets the better of me, I'm sure someone I know will have it on DVD.
I'll have to be pretty drunk though. It's hard to watch Lucas continually bludgeon the already-dead body of my childhood fantasies. Episode 1 had way too much CG, and Episode 2 was like watching a warthog romancing a peacock.
The House Between - Original Sci-Fi Series
The Jedi, who are supposed to be very very smart, attacking into what is completely obviously a trap
Remember, that was before the introduction of Admiral Akbar.
Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
I hadn't seen Titanic and my buddy ruined it for me. Who knew that ship could sink?
That, or Anikin will just brood some more about how much he doesn't like sand, and then abruptly turn into a fountain of misplaced rage for no damn reason at all.
where - after cutting his legs and arm off, Ben leaves Skywalker burning alive on the shores of a lava river
On a bright sunny day on Mustafar, Obi-Wan Kenobi was taking a pleasant stroll around the lava river. He spots an armless and legless Anakin Skywalker and, moved with pity, he asks young Skywalker if there's anything he can do for him. Skywalker replies, 'well, I've never been hugged before'. In response, Kenobi gives Anakin a big ol' bear hug and satisfied with his good deed, continues on his pleasant stroll around the river. He come back around to the place where Anakin lay and decided to ask him if there was anything else he needed. To this, Anakin replies, 'well, I've never been kissed before'. Kenobi thinks for second, and though a little hesitant, gives Anakin a peck on the forehead. He leaves again, satisfied. He comes back around a third time and again, asks Anakin if there's anything he wants. Anakin says "well, I've never been fucked before!" and so Kenobi picks him up, throws him in the lava river and shouts 'now you're fucked!'
Okay, so a philosopher, a philologist, and a philatelist walk into a bar...
This also explains why Threepio was never hit by a laser bolt in the opening battle aboard the blockade runner .. Vader was like, "if you see a gold protocol droid, DON'T SHOOT IT .. it's mine!"
It's not a lie. It's the truth with lossy compression.
Sounds like instead of going into the theater, Kevin Smith accidentally wandered into a broom closet with a burnt-out light bulb and hung out eating a big tub of popcorn for two hours.
They also revealed that Luke and Leia's kid (remember their kiss)
:o)
Umm, I hate to break this to you (as I'm sure you'd find out once you hit puberty), but your parents lied to you - you don't get pregnant through kissing.
Good luck reading it, seems the site was "slashdotted" and is struggling to stay up. If only Kevin Smith used IIS 6... On a side note, does anyone know if Jar Jar bites it in this one? I for one am a big fan of Jar Jar biting it. And by "Biting it" I am not making an improper oral inference, I mean does he get eliminated? And by Eliminated, I do not mean excreted, I mean made to stop functioning, and not like a conjunction junction, for he has no function.
Leah being Luke's sister was an idea which came to him when he was 2/3 done writing "Return of the Jedi."
I especially like when Luke tells her and she says she always knew.
Yeah? Even when you were frenching him!? You sick weirdo!
You can't take the sky from me...
As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
Pfft. Like they could have hit it anyway.
No silly, the Imperial Senate signs on to the Kyoto Protocol and fuel for the thrusters becomes too expensive.
LK
"Hi. This is my friend, Jack Shit, and you don't know him." - Lord Kano
Lucas brought in Rick Berman. Obi Wan's ship gets stuck in a temporal rift and gets hurled into the future, where he learns what Annakin turns into. Fortunately, Han Solo is able to rig R2D2's memory system to Obi Wan's ship's power drive and generate a relnaran field, sending the ship back in time so that Obi Wan can make sure to finish off Anakin, altering the timeline so that he never becomes Darth Vader at all.
paintball
yeah! i totally walked out of the third Lord of the Rings movie, when it opened in the middle of the story, i was like all "who the hell are these people? fuck this movie!"
i mean, god, why did it have to have the same characters and plot and from the other movies, i saw The Two Towers, like, a whole YEAR before it came out, why did i have to remember every single little detail, like, who the short guy was, or why that ring was important, or who the long haired scruffy guy was? that's retarded!!!!
May you be touched by His Noodly Appendage. RAmen.
Actually, I've waited my whole life to see Episodes 4-6 until after ROTS and now you've ruined it for me.
Thanks alot.
Anakin becomes Darth Vader!
Leia and Luke are twin babies of Anakin and are snuck away to separate locations far far from home.
Anakin falls into a volcano - but lives - barely.
And Yoda gets arthritis.
Ok, I made that last one up
-- Tigger warning: This post may contain tiggers! --