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Nerds Make Better Lovers
ultimabaka writes "The New York Daily News, fine bastion of reporting that it is, released an article today discussing the rise of nerd popularity among women in general, and famous women in particular. Detail is given into the dating exploits of Christina Aguilera and Elin Nordegren (nerdy Tiger Woods' supermodel squeeze), among a bunch of regular Janes. Apparently being a nerd is now in?"
Of course we're better lovers.. it's because (among other things):
:-D
- we don't sleep around
- we're generally good at the things we try
- we can concentrate, dammit!
- we have *excellent* finger dexterity
- and most importantly, we have imagination!
more here >>
The day is mine!
Game... blouses.
_rich_ nerds make better "lovers"
So being a rich, well-televised sports figure now makes you a nerd? Interesting.
Sure, they figure it out now that I'm married and totally committed, but noooooo, 15 years ago when I was 18 and single no one figured it out.
It sucks to be a trailblazer sometimes. You young nerds got it easy. Back in my day a cute girlfriend was GIF pr0n & a bottle of lotion.
As a rock-in-roll Physicist once said, No matter where you go, there you are.
Only a geek knows how to fsck well.
- Just because we CAN do a thing, does not mean we SHOULD do that thing.
Saturday, May 21st 2005
Saw him in the evening and he was acting really strangely. I went shopping in the afternoon with the girls and I did turn up a bit late so thought it might be that. The bar was really crowded and loud so I suggested we go somewhere quieter to talk. He was still very subdued and distracted so I suggested we go somewhere nice to eat. All through dinner he just didn't seem himself; he hardly laughed and didn't seem to be paying any attention to me or to what I was saying. I just knew that something was wrong. He dropped me back home and I wondered if he was going to come in; he hesitated but followed. I asked him again if there was something the matter but he just half shook his head and turned the television on. After about 10 minutes of Silence, I said I was going upstairs to bed. I put my arms around him and told him that I loved him deeply. He just gave a sigh and a sad sort of smile. He didn't follow me up but later he did, and I was surprised when we made love. He still seemed distant and a bit cold, and I started to think that he was going to leave me and that he had found someone else. I cried myself to sleep.
MAN'S DIARY:
Saturday, May 21st 2005
Apple switched to Intel.
Absolutely gutted.
Got a shag though.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Apparently being a nerd is now in?
Let me check my messages.....
0. Nope, still the status quo here!
Bryan R.
The price of freedom is eternal vigilance, or $12.50 as seen on eBay.....
You idiot, it's UNIX, not Eunuchs!
I will say what you did took some, er.... Nevermind.
Soko
"Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm." - Anonymous
Only in NY Daily News' bizzaro world would a 6'2" guy with rippling muscles, can hit a ball 350 yards with a driver, has WORLD-CLASS hand-eye-coordination, and was routinely named as the MOST AVAILABLE BACHELOR IN THE WORLD (before he got married) would be described as "nerdy".
Yeah, and I hear Brad Pitt is practically a hermit.
Revenge of the Nerds:
Louis: Jocks only think about sports, nerds only think about sex.
In this classic (cough!) film the nerd 'hero' sleeps with the cheerleader heroine (he is in disguise as 'Darth Vader'), satisfying her mightily. She then discovers his identity, and asks how he can be such a fantastic lover, and he reveals the secret: "We nerds never have girlfriends, so all we do is think about sex." After all, it has been proven by science (scientists are nerds, remember) that the brain is the most important sexual organ. It has also recently been proven (again, by nerd scientists who sit at their computers all day) that just THINKING about exercising is almost as effective at increasing strength as actually exercising. Therefore, it makes sense that just thinking about sex must make you better at it.
Serving your airship needs since 1995.
You sir, are either a sham or an impostor.
I am sure there will be a lot of comments on this article like "Yay! I can get a hottie!" now. However, speaking as a woman who has dated several geeks, I thought I would share a woman's perspective.
1) I can't tell you how many geek guys I know who can't even take care of their most basic personal hygiene needs. You need to shower at least once a day and use deodorant to become reasonably attractive to any woman. No woman is turned on by stinky body odor.
2) Self-confidence is attractive. Unfortunately, many geeks think self-confidence is something for guys who brag about every "conquest" they have. It's not. Self-confidence is simply respect and love for who you are. Love yourself first and good relationships will follow. This is difficult, but it's the key ingredient to any successful relationship. If you know who you are and you love who you are, people will love and respect you that much more.
3) Complaining/whining is not attractive. Some geeks have very bitter personalities and spend a lot of time whining about how the world would be a better place if only this or that. (The most common one I hear is whining about a job they're in.) If you complain, do something about it! Start your own business. Program something better on the side and sell it. Take control of the situation and create something better instead of griping.
4) Being a slave isn't attractive. If you make it clear that you'll do anything for a woman, and grovel for her affection, you're going to end up attracting the wrong type of woman. Any successful relationship is a two-way street. While there's nothing wrong with showing your love and affection, groveling only means you'll get taken advantage of and perhaps become bitter about (see #3.)
5) Lead a balanced life. No one is less attractive than someone who sits on a computer all day and never gets out of the house. Plus, it doesn't make for a healthy life of your own (I should know; I work from home and often spend 12-16 hours a day in front of the computer.) Get out there, meet people, and have fun. It will make you feel better about yourself to have a good group of friends around, as well.
I have been in several great relationships with geeky guys. I find the most successful relationships I have are with guys who already have a decent level of self-confidence and several friends who respect and love them. They may be interested in computers, but they are also interested in having fun and getting out of the house on a regular basis. Take this guide to heart and you can have a good relationship with the right woman as well.
Simpli - Your source for San Jose dedicated servers and colocation!
Thus, we can conclude that IT security at the New York Daily News is lax and some "nerd" has figured out a way to post prank stories. Expect a deluge of stories about the Duke Nukem Forever release party.
"Prepare for the worst - hope for the best."
We are certain to have the biggest hard drives, and the longest uptime.
Things to think about once my paladin hits level 60.
Now that that's out of the way, I can make a more rational response.
Women are attracted to intelligence and stability? As a femmegeek, I've known this for ages. What irks me about most of the comments is the reversion to early adolescence that marks these discussions. Using the experiences of high school as a benchmark for your entire life seems a really bass-ackwards thing to do. Almost nobody is, as a teenager, self-confident enough to choose a dating partner without regard to what your "friends" might say. And yes; women can be horribly self-absorbed and shallow. Even women who self-identify as "nerdy". Guess what, though: men can too, and in some ways, they can be even worse about it. I have, sadly, dated male geeks who wanted me around because having an attractive female on their arm supposedly raised their status, somehow. Never mind that I was at least as intelligent as they were; they wanted a trophy, and nothing more. However, I've stuck with the high-IQ set, instead of lowering my standards, because I am attracted to intelligence. I think that many, many other women out there are as well, but given the still-prevalent expectation that "girls aren't..." (good at math, interested in science, fill in your stereotype of choice), most women are more than a little reluctant to admit it. The 50s-era maternal admonition of "boys don't like girls who are too smart" still echoes today.
Luckily, I never bought into it. So I sit here, posting on Slashdot, an intelligent, fit, good-looking geek woman, who isn't ashamed to admit the fact. And I think that I speak for a number of my fellow geekettes, gentlemen, when I say that smart is sexy. If you want to engage my hormones, engage my brain first. I'm not going to make hot sweaty snugglebunnies with anyone with whom I can't have a good conversation.
Doing my level best to piss off the religious right wing...
Back in my day a cute girlfriend was GIF pr0n & a bottle of lotion.
I'm dating your' ex!
An artist, lawyer and programmer are sitting at a pub, having a few drink and soon the conversation turns towards cheating on their wives.
:)
The lawyer pipes up. "Don't do it guys, I don't care how pretty she is. I see this every day in my profession, some fool cheats on his wife with some pretty little thing, she finds out, before you know it he's lost half his house, half his assets, half his future paycheck and can't even see his kids any more...And with all that stress, it's just not worth it."
Then the artist pipes in. "no no no no...life is for living...how can you live in fear like that. Imagine the romance...the passion...the secrecy and mystery. That is what life is about my friend, who cares if you get caught, life should be lived dangerously and passionately."
The programmer looks up over his glasses and says "yeah, I've got mistress...have had one for quite a few years now".
The lawyer and artist are shocked. The certainly wouldn't have expected that from thier geeky little friend. The artist pipes up:
"Oh my friend...tell us, what's it like. Are you always stressed out worried about what you could loose...is it passionate and wonderful...what?"
The programmer looks up again and say "It's great...best thing I've every done.........wife thinks I'm with the girlfriend, girlfriend thinks I'm with the wife, I can go get some coding done."
boom tish
Your list of suggestions make sense, but as a self-proclaimed "geek guy" who believes he already follows most of those, I'd still have to make a few counter-points.
1. I *do* complain (or whine; your pick how you wish to label it) a lot about things I observe in the world around me. If that's too "unattractive" for a woman to deal with, so be it. But I usually point such things out to spark a conversation. I'm typically upset at something I think needs to be pointed out and addressed, rather than just swept under the rug. All too often, I think women want to avoid confrontation or discussion that might not be of the "happy, happy - joy, joy" type. You know... the types that try to end all political discussion at a table as soon as it starts, with a "can't we just talk about something ELSE?!" plea?
2. I'm not too convinced many women really want a guy that seems very "into" them at all? Practically every time I've been in a new relationship that I was really excited about (felt those "sparks" from the first time we met and all that good stuff), the thing that seemed to immediately terminate it was expressing the fact that I felt so strongly about it! My theory is, women want to feel like they're the ones who "won the guy over" themselves... They want to be the one in the "driver's seat" after the guy makes that first move and does the initial "hitting on them" and they accept. No matter how much you're falling into "like", "love" or "lust" for the woman, the only thing she wants is for you to pay attention to her on her terms, and always drop what you're doing to come over there *if you're invited*, but NOT to start doing things on your own to show how much you care. It has to be HER show, played out the way SHE wants it to play out.
3. On the "balanced life" thing, sure - everyone needs to get out in public now and then. But if you're really into computers, you can use that to your advantage rather than it working against you here. The computer is the ultimate communications tool! Get into a local IRC chat room for your city or state and organize a "get together" for the people who congregate there. Use email to invite some people out for dinner or bowling or trivia night or whatever you think they'd all enjoy. Do some searches online for recommendations of interesting things to do or see in your area. Buy a cheap hand-held GPS and get into the new hobby of GeoCaching! (www.geocaching.com)
Yesterday, while sifting through the UK version of a Cosmo, I found the most remarkable ad I think I've ever seen. It was for a soap product, I think, but the photo was that of 20 Exactly Normal Looking Women. It occured to me that I dont think I've ever actually *seen* Normal Looking Women before...
I put the ad in front of my fiance, and watched. Over about seven seconds, his face turned from daily-default expression to smelling-onions-and-old-celery. "They're all tubby" he said. I was crushed.
I was crushed because I work out three times a week, pay all the bills, get paid roughly three times as much as he does, ride a motorcycle, have fabulous hair, very often get asked out, and this all adds up to one thing.
I can't be normal. I'm not allowed. If I get to be normal, it means that I've just lost whatever it was that made me.
I listen when he's having a horrible day. I dance when there's no music for no reason. I come home and work on the house-wifey duties, and I make him laugh so hard and so often that any tone in his stomach is at least 60% to my credit. I never thought that I'd have to figure out how to be a good mate despite being pretty because now being pretty is synonymous with being ditzy.
He is an engineer, and a mechanic, and one of the most nerdy guys I've ever met. He is doting, and flattering, and patient, and as long as I continue to be nothing short of a full-blown goddess, he will continue to be wonderful.
At least pretty-boys are low maintainance. At least jocks and players they know they're worthless, it actually turned them into better people. Nerds aren't the underdogs, they're the staple, now...and they know it.
Congratulations boys, now you're the trophy.
{...reality is wrong, Dreams are for real...}