Slashdot Mirror
Snakes on The Net Fail to Put Butts in the Seats
Lev13than writes "An article in The Globe & Mail discusses the disappointing performance of Snakes on a Plane. Despite extensive Internet hype and unprecedented audience involvement in the movie's development, it barely slithered into first place with a meager $13.8M weekend box office. 'The Internet stuff was just fun that people were having with it, but I don't think that necessarily meant that those people wanted to see the movie... those who had made that decision based their decision more on the traditional marketing than on all this Internet buzz.' Was all of the hype about blogger power just that — hype?"
There are motherF***in' snakes on the motherf***in' Plane!
Half of the Slashdot crowd will just download the flick and wonder why the producers are so disappointed in the film's performance at the box office.
Then they will post about the virtues of free software... knowing full well that they really mean beer.
I am very small, utmostly microscopic.
What, they thought we were serious? *blink*
-Eric
SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
The studio execs wanted to call it "Pacific Air 414" for chrissakes!
Fortunately Sam L. went to them and said, "I want those motherfuckin' snakes on that motherfuckin' plane!"
When told to watch his language because it was a PG-13 movie he said, "It's English, motherfucker. Do you speak it?"
KFG
I'm tired of these motherfucking articles about motherfucking snakes on a motherfucking plane!
This guy's the limit!
I think they could have made more of the 'insensitivity' angle. They should have marketed it with: if you do not go and see Snakes on a Plane, then the terrorists have already won. It would also have helped to bring forward the release date to August 16th, planned date for the liquid explosive attacks on transatlantic jets.
It would be handy if the movie included some suspicious bearded character on the plane who in the end turns out to save it Wesley-Crusher style. I haven't yet seen the film, so for all I know perhaps it does.
-- Ed Avis ed@membled.com
AZspot
Horses and dogs would trust humans a LOT less
A bunch of Holywood studio executives and their lawyers throw a big party on a plane. The soundtrack is by Whitesnake.
Bill Gates would be serving his fourth year in prison.
The legal sysetm tried hard but garbage trucks full of money trump the internet
John Kerry would be president.
Many geeks hate all politicians equally.
Richard Stallman would be on television.
Give it time. It will happen.
Churches would fold up because of lack of interest.
My Level 41 Paladin disagrees with you.
Anime would be everywhere.
Give it time. There's a heck of a lot more of it then there was.
Star Trek would have its own cable channel. Or two.
And leave out SG-1 and Farscape? It's more likely we'll get a Sci-Fi channel. OH WAIT WE HAVE THAT!
...wasn't delivered or in any way feature Samuel L. Jackson.
It's the scene where a smug asshole goes to take a leak, and is musing to himself about his penis size. (This character is definitely the target audience for all those p3-n15_E3nlaargmt spams you see.) He winds up tinkling on a great big viper. The viper leaps and grabs hold of his crotchal region.
"FUCKING SNAKE!!! GET OFF MY DICK!!!" he screams before succumbing to the venom. That's gotta be a more useful phrase than "I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane."
Yeah, I thought it was a whole lot of fun too. It would have become a DVD classic if it had been released without the hype...one of those movies people discover at the DVD store. As it is we still haven't heard from the rest of the world with regard to SoaP. Don't count it out just yet. It will make back the money it cost to film the thing and then some.
Knowledge is power. Knowledge shared is power multiplied.
Even I knew it was a poor premise for a film. The person that green-lighted that project was probably using some type of controlled substances at the time. But I have a great idea for a movie, "Techs in a Cube".
"Put your message in a modem, and throw it into the cyber-sea." - Rush
Die pally scum!
(Sorry... reflex.)
Game... blouses.
The long winter evenings must just fly by.
That's going to be the sequel. Snakes on a Bus.
It'll be short, Chuck Norris will say "I hate snakes" and they'll ALL DIE.
Shadus
Anaconda had growling snakes. GROWLING SNAKES! It deserves an oscar for that alone.
The problem here isn't that the movie only made 13.8 million, the problem is that it cost 30 million to produce it.
Yeah. It's too bad that movies don't get more than a single weekend in the box office to earn back their money.
Funny, the only thing I remembered about Anaconda was a dripping wet Jennifer Lopez, not the fake snakes or Jon Voight
sage
What we need is Motherfucking asses in the Motherfucking seats !
Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion, you must set yourself on fire.