Slashdot Mirror
Get on the 'Gates for President' Bandwagon
netbuzz writes "Dilbert's Scott Adams kicked off the idea in his November 19th blog post, saying there isn't anything wrong with this country that President Bill Gates couldn't cure in less time than it takes to get a new operating system out the door. Today, the idea is moving forward with a brand-new 'Bill Gates for President' Web site. Adams is also back on the campaign trail, flogging the site and Gates' candidacy." A blog post at Network World includes a lot of eye-rolling about this idea, but neither Adams nor the folks at the 'Gates for President' website seem to be taking this lightly.
Geez ... if people thought Dick Cheney was cold and ruthless, wait until they have Bill Gates in charge. Plus, imagine some of the innovations we'd see:
... the new city will be named Capitol 2.0
... at first you may think it looks just like DC, but we actually repainted all the buildings, and added innovative new parking meters that destroy your car if you try to park in same parking spot more than 3 times.
Pres Gates Day 1: The U.S. needs to become the most innovative country in the world, so I have decided in interest of attaining this goal we will rebuild Washington D.C.
Pres Gates Day 365: The Capital 2.0 is running ahead of schedule, I know it's been tough living and working out of trailers, but we should be finished within a year
Pres Gates Day 700: Due to the new competition from Tokyo's rebuilding operations, we have decided to restart our Capitol 2.0 project, but the delay will be worth it since our new Capitol will be even better than the original one planned
Pres Gates Day 1000: We have found that the Capitol 2.0 subway system was incompatible with the Capitol 2.0 sewage system, so we will rebuild DC's old subway system and try to make it work within the Capitol 2.0 structure
Pres Gates on his last day: On my final day in office, I am proud to unveil Capitol 2.0
Crack - Free with every butt and set of boobs
"Blue State of Death" ?
"there isn't anything wrong with this country that President Bill Gates couldn't cure in less time than it takes to get a new operating system out the door"
Have things really got that bad?
*''I can't believe it's not a hyperlink.''
1. He wants to buy an old Cesna, paintit flashy colors, and call it Air Force '95.
2. He heard that some government agencies were using UNIX.
3. He wants to get that illegal sports car in SF Bay into the US.
4. He just thinks it would be neat to be president of two big thingies.
5. He's hot for Janet Reno.
6. His ego needs to be inflated.
7. He lost the key to his mansion, so he needs a new place to live.
8. He thinks that he can use MS Money to balance the budget.
9. He feels that Perot just didn't throw enough money at it.
10. He wants to make Windows '95 the official operating system of the USA.
Ok, those look kind of dated...but still funny
On the serious side, I wonder how many people with the power to see into the mysterious future, were tempted to e-mail the editor about a SERIOUS problem with this story!
Transporter_ii
Doctors destroy health, lawyers destroy justice, universities destroy knowledge, religion destroys spirituality
You must have heard that a couple of years ago.
Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
I'd rather vote for John Cusack.
I'm not a Troll, it's reverse psychology.
I’ve been saying for years that we need to stop electing millionaires.
Careful what ya wish for, I suppose.
Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
Thank you, Scott.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
One way to make sure it doesn't happen:
Slashdot it!!
Quick, someone tell Digg, then Fark!
There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
Crow T. Trollbot
Will there be a "Cowboy Neal" option on the ballot?
Monstar L
Yes, as George W. Bush has clearly demonstrated, the key to success in politics is to be an unsuccessful yet still rich businessman.
Hell, I think I would rather vote for Joan Cusack...
Beware of Sales Reps bearing gifts.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
yes, but Forbes apparently a) owns a mirror and b) has stopped let his mother pick out his clothes for him.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
So what does he do for the other 23 hours and 55 minutes?
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
...and extend it...
Step into a huge movement. Don't Tread In Me.
Yow! A brand new mindless hot-button issue! Stop the presses! A guy who actually knows how to operate a computer should be president! Not some pen-wielding dipshit, not some bozo who can't tell the backtick from an apostrophe, but a guy who can actually bring up a certain word processing program, type something in it, and successfully print it and save it to disk! Brilliant, Holmes, brilliant!
Where can we find such a strange and noble leader? Elect him at once, I say! I for one welcome our new mouse-button-pressing overlord!
Of course, he did gratuitously use a backslash instead of a forward slash in pathnames. And, not to be picky, but the space in the "Program Files" directory name was not a good idea, nor was the two-character sequence in DOS file carriage returns. And that whole monopoly thing, are we over that yet?
...are we scared yet?
But Bill Gates wasn't in Predator.
Intron: the portion of DNA which expresses nothing useful.
I'd rather vote for John Carmack.
I.. I don't think you read the part where I said an impartial opinion without emotion. I read yours and all I see is FDLJFfdjsa;FD;jdsfla ME ANGRY.
Nice try though, you almost had a point.
Boy are *you* gonna regret that comment 90 days after he's elected!
"If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear." - Every fascist, ever
I'd rather vote for Carnac the Magnificent
Mod parent Up. He has a point.
Non sequitur: Your facts are uncoordinated.
http://www.billgatesforpresident.net/ was running Apache on Linux when last queried at 30-Nov-2006 21:41:05 GMT
Duh.
CC.
TaijiQuan (Huang, 5 loosenings)
Indeed, when I look at our president, I remember not to hire from those Universities.
"Who is the Journal of Quantum Physics going to believe?" --Stephen Hawking
I'd rather vote for Cohen the Barbarian.
SIGSEGV caught, terminating
wait... not that kind of sig.
I know there's already a top ten list related but bear with me...
The Top Ten Actions of The Newly Elected President Gates
10) Air Force One? To paraphrase the Stones, Paint it Brown!
9) Civics classes in school now include mandatory read of "The Road Ahead".
8) Stallman put on "Do Not Fly or Speak" list.
7) What's key to the countries economy? Housing Developers, Housing Developers, Housing Developers! Oops, wrong pres.
6) All military fighter jets retrofitted with iDrive, trunk opening code wired to missile launch.
5) Congress split into Congress Home and Congress Business divisions (you can guess where all the current members go)
4) "The White House isn't wired for GigE? Where's my hammer"
3) Calling Jobs, Ellison, and McNeal and making them sing "Hail to the Chief".
2) Nuclear command infrastructure wired to Vista speech recognition, hijinks ensue.
1) "Hey pie guy, where ya' going?" "I'm going to Gitmo!".
"There is more worth loving than we have strength to love." - Brian Jay Stanley
"I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS!!!"
Lump lingered last in line for brains, and the ones she got were sorta rotten and insane.
In this world, you have only predators and prey. I would always choose to be the predator.
If he could do for the US what he did for operating systems, then the US would own the whole world, but it would be a crappy place to live and wouldn't work very well.
Tequila: It's not just for breakfast anymore!
Making up words is also very innovatorious. You, sir, are a true innovatoriat.
It's been a long time.
So you're saying nothing would change...
https://www.eff.org/https-everywhere
What is he going to do, round up all the Mac users?
Yes.
Fire and Meat. Yummy.
I'd rather vote for Jack Thomps... wait, what the fuck am I saying?!! *shoots self*
"[Regarding the 'cloud,'] ownership was what made America different than Russia." -- Woz
I'd rather vote for John Dvorak.
May the source be with you.
I'd rather vote for Günther Frhr von Gravenreuth.
I have, I'll get right on it... oh, er, whoops!
To err is human, to arr is pirate.