Slashdot Mirror
Yellowstone Supervolcano Making Strange Rumblings
Frosty Piss writes "Supervolcanoes can sleep for centuries or millennia before producing incredibly massive eruptions that can drop ash across an entire continent. One of the largest supervolcanoes in the world lies beneath Yellowstone National Park. Significant activity continues beneath the surface. And the activity has been increasing lately, scientists have discovered. In addition, the nearby Teton Range of mountains is somehow getting shorter. The findings, reported this month in the Journal of Journal of Geophysical Research, suggest that a slow and gradual movement of a volcano over time can shape a landscape more than a violent eruption."
"Teton" is french for booby.
It's true I tell you, feller at work's next door neighbour read it in the paper.
Better not happen before I find out what happens in Lost.
sacrifice a virgin! yeah, theres plenty of those here reading slashdot im sure..
-Dirtbag
Last time I visited Yellowstone, I saw some people throwing half eaten burritos and other Mexican food loaded with refried beans into these blow holes, vents and what not. Told them it is dangerous, but no body would listen. People are senseless!
sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
I mean it, really hungry.
... and thanks for all the fish!
You need to get your Volcano software from a company that will be there to send you patches and keep your volcano humming along nicely. You can't trust those pesky Linux starups that last only until all the share options are cashed up.
You also need to consider Total Cost of Ownership. That is, beyond the ticket price you need to consider the costs associated with keeping your volcano up to date over the centuries. Independent analysis shows that Microsoft Windows for Volcanos is the best software choice for your volcano.
Engineering is the art of compromise.
Judging by all the inflation, pressure and possible eruptions - scientists have concluded that Yellowstone really needs to get laid.
He who knows best knows how little he knows. - Thomas Jefferson
These scientists are just spewing a bunch of hot air. I think they are pulling it out of their ashes.
I would like to tell you something to help calm your nerves, but I'm too busy digging out my shelter to stop just yet.
There are 10 kinds of people in the world... those who understand binary and those who don't.
This is obviously due to human activities. Probably the weight of all the SUV's people are driving there on vacation is compressing the magma resulting in increased volcanic activity. There's no way this is natural.
I love quantum theory.
the NPG electrode was replaced with carbon blac
On the bright side, SCO would have front row seats.
Eat hot ash Darl!
The volcano god is angry! Quickly, we must sacrifice all virgins to appease it!
GAAH! MY PRINTER IS ON FIRE!!! PUT IT OUT! PUT IT OUT!
The last time I got a traffic citation was about 1990.
The one before that was about 1985
And before that about 1980.
Does that mean that there is a cycle of 5 years between citations and that I'm overdue for another citation?
I'm going to transform myself into a mighty hawk. Either that or I'll just go and work at Dixons, haven't decided yet.
But I warn you, there will be casualties. Everyone but the romantic leading man and the vulnerable-but-tough woman will be in real mortal danger. But I know we can do it!
SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
If the Yellowstone Supervolcano blows, the last forecast I heard was that it will be about 100 times as powerful as the Thera/Santorini explosion. The sound alone will probably kill everyone in the contenental US instantly. It's only the rest of the human race that has to suffer and die during the resulting ice age.
Have a nice day. =)
//Information does not want to be free; it wants to breed.
If the global economy survives, there will be some pretty awesome post-apocalyptic video games to play off of this. Tired of the WWII rehashes.
Global catastrophe and end of life as know it aside, this could be positive for gaming!
Imagine what it would take to turn over all the soil in Kansas. Oh... wait... that happens at the start of every planting. So. If this happens during the winter, they might need to scrape off some ash, pile it by the side of the field, or take and put it in a big pile someplace (which is what happens to grain a lot of the time anyway). The real concern is that it will happen during the growing season and interfere with growth and harvest.
You can't compare the clearing of a massive wreck of twisted metal and concrete full of remains to clearing a field. Obviously, interfering with growth and harvest is a major concern. If it's not raining, a strategy involving a blower attachment to a combine might still save the crop. Somebody should test that. If it rains though, your crop couuld end up encased in something with the consistancy of wet cement. Also, you've got to filter those engines really well. Somebody should test this, like FEMA... umm... ok, umm... yeah, we're fucked.
For all intensive purposes, "whom" is no longer a word. That begs the question, "who cares"?
Just wait. The Yellowstone supervolcano and the New Madrid fault are both overdue. Comes 2036, asteroid Apophis hits the Earth, triggering the New Madrid fault which in turn pushes Yellowstone over the edge.
On the upside, we won't have to worry about the 2038 unix/linux clock rollover.
-- Alastair
We need as many of them as possible to stand on park itself, providing extra weight to keep the ground down. We need the equivalent of about 20 metric-Oprahs per acre over the long term. This will cause the magma bubble to recede, and bulge somewhere else. The Bush administration is doing research (on cable tv) to see if that bulge will happen in Iran.
The problem with quotes on the internet, is that nobody bothers to check their veracity. -- Abraham Lincoln
I've read about the caldera previously.
So have I, and my prediction based on previous history it will just change it's name to a three letter acronym, fail to sue IBM and fizzle out leaving a smoking crater in Utah.
Oh, we're talking about geology...
Blank until
But if it can be determined that the end is near, you can get your affairs in order.
And you can run your testicles on empty.
i don't own emergency pants!
:)
Just remember this rule when buying emergency pants:
Emergency pants are always brown.
You already know why.
This is my sig. There are many like it but this one is... Oops. Frank, I've got your sig again! Where's mine?
Move to Europe
I lived in Europe from 1980 through 1993. In retrospect, I'd rather go with the supervolcano.
"Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason."
That's okay, they'll just change their name back to Caldera.