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NASA Contractor Needs Urine
Apparently, NASA sent a memo to its employees at the Johnson Space Center asking for their urine so they, NASA, could use it to test the Orion space capsule. How much urine? 30 liters per day, including weekends. Disposal of urine for up to six months would be required if Orion is to work as planned.
Alert reader nettamere adds a link to story at Discovery.com, excerpting: "Donations will be treated with a chemical that can hold solid particulates in the liquid so they don't clog up the tubing in microgravity, said Leo Makowski, company spokesman for Hamilton Sundstrand, a contractor designing the new spaceship's toilet. ... "It's difficult to come up with a faux urine, explained NASA's Jim Lewis, the systems manager overseeing development of Orion's potty. 'That's why we depend on collections.'"
They must be taking the piss.
http://twitter.com/onion2k
NASA is beginning a secret drug testing program.
30 Liters per day? Damn...
In other news, Management at NASA has announced that coffee for employees will now not only be free, but mandatory.
It's just a wee amount to ask for.
"Flyin' in just a sweet place,
Never been known to fail..."
Perhaps the name says it all.
It's the Golden Age of Space Exploration!
"Flyin' in just a sweet place,
Never been known to fail..."
In fact, this is all a part of NASA's effort to develop the most intensive watersports programs ever conceived...
Bow-ties are cool.
They are just trying to sap our precious bodily fluids!
Why didn't they need urine when I had kidney stones. I could have supplied NASA with all the urine myself.
"Contractor Tells NASA To Piss Off"
Proverbs 21:19
For once the troll post is Insightful.
My first Journal Entry ever, in 8 years! http://slashdot.org/journal/365947/aphelion-scifi-fantasy-horror-poetry-webzine
30 Liters a day? Man...if they don't manage to collect that, they're going to be pissed. What's even more disconcerting is that I'm sure the Number One guy at NASA is a wee bit worried about the results. He was overheard telling the Orion project manager, "You're in over your head on this one."
Hopefully additional information will be leaked so the true details of this story can be flushed out.
I just sent my resume and a teaser bottle of piss.
It's probably more difficult to get a badger to piss in a bottle than a human. It would also take a lot of badgers to generate 30 liters per day. I suppose a polar bear would generate more, but that causes other problems such as a shortage of interns to feed the bear.
Interior smooth-looking office. Mr Feldman behind a desk, Mr Martin in front of it. Both point to a sign on the desk: 'Life Insurance Ltd'.
Martin: Good morning. I've been in touch with you about the, er, life insurance...
Feldman: Ah yes, did you bring the um ... the specimen of your um ... and so on, and so on?
Martin: Yes I did. It's in the car. There's rather a lot.
Feldman: Good, good.
Martin: Do you really need twelve gallons?
Feldman: No, no, not really.
Martin: Do you test it?
Feldman: No.
Martin: Well, why do you want it?
Feldman: Well, we do it to make sure that you're serious about wanting insurance, I mean, if you're not, you won't spend a couple of months filling up that enormous churn with mmm, so on and so on...
Martin: Shall I bring it in?
Feldman: Good Lord no. Throw it away.
Editor, A1-AAA AmeriCaptions
Where are they going to store all that urine? I remember a study on pregnancy where they needed real urine, which apparently breaks down rather rapidly, so they kept it all in the fridge. It's a bit scary to think of NASA working out of a giant refrigerator of pee. And I feel sorry for the guy who got an advanced degree, got a job at NASA, and is now the pee handler.
Affordable Health Coverage
I bet he was a wanker. =)
It's probably a covert drug test.
*puts on tinfoil hat*
Have you ever see the earth from space...on weed???
I'm going to tell me son to look into this. He was pretty excited recently when he discovered he could sell his semen for $250 a pop.
His urine might not fetch as much but he's got more of it.
But who the hell wants to take Kevin Costner with them into orbit?
Rule of Slashdot #0: You and people like you are not representative of the larger population. - A.C.
People with access to chloroform and an airlock?
...for the first mission to Uranus.
... if they collect all of this urine, is there not a job that requires someone pour all of it into the toilet?.... I guess, could you say that it really is a piss pour job?
People who masturbate for research can go double blind.
R. Kelly
My favorite quote doesn't fit into 120 characters. Now no one will like me.
"Be right back guys, gotta perform some NASA-level rocket science"
I am the richest astronaut ever to win the superbowl.
This just proves that NASA is a piss poor organization.
"Operation Goldenflow"... (for urinalysis, as described by Sailors...)
But, at first, I thought a contractor required this urine. SO, if they have a performance clause involved, and don't/can't get enough, will they be subject to fines for "piss-poor performance"? (LOL!)
Also, reminds me of "Prior proper planning prevents piss-poor performance"...
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
This guy is number one in the field!
masturbate a pig (last link is probably NSFW).
I wonder what line of thought you followed to reach "I should tag this "masturbate a pig" youtube link with NSFW."
And I wonder what your manager would think if he caught you watching a video of a man masturbating a pig.