Microsoft Zunes Committing Mass Suicide
jddeluxe writes "There are multiple reports springing up all over the internet of a mass suicide of Microsoft 30GB Zune players globally. Check Zune forums, Gizmodo, or other such sites; the reports are spreading rapidly, except apparently to the Microsoft official Zune site."
It's a Stand Alone Complex!
No good deed goes unpunished. - Avon, Blake's 7
Blue Zune Of Death!
I guess they just allocated a 3 bit year, in their systems (starting year 2000). Hey who would think there would still have Zunes around b 2009.
If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
30mb Zune? Micro$oft? Go back to /b/ CmdrTaco
Let me know when one commits homicide. That will be news.
They've successfully dispelled the rumor that no own owns a Zune.
Do you even lift?
These aren't the 'roids you're looking for.
$top the pre$$e$, thi$ ju$t in -- $la$hdot ridicule$ Micro$oft!
Al$o I think $omeone me$$ed around with my keyboard driver$...
You don't need no entertainment
You dont need no Zune control
No dark sarcasm on the nets
People leave them Zunes alone
Hey! people! Leave them Zunes alone!
All in all it's just another brick in the wall.
All in all you're just another brick in the wall.
Take the cheese to sickbay, the doctor should see it as soon as possible - B'Elanna Torres, "Learning Curve"
but something touched me deep inside...the day the 30 gigs died
I started singing "bye, bye MS 30 gig zune"
tried to download from the zune store but the zune store was dry
and the ms fanboys were drinking whiskey and rye
the day...the 30 gigs died
Designed Obsolescence.
You didn't really think they'd support this thing through 2009 did you? Oh, go back and read your EULA. It clearly states that at the start of 2009 you'll have to pay a subscription fee for you unit to continue working. You signed it in blood from the paper cut. Legally binding in hell.
That is a common mistake that anyone who is older then 30 years can do. Dag Nabbit, Back in my day I would have pined for a 30 megabyte music player. We had to use instruments fashioned out on animal hides and termite infested wood. Then pay from memory the music. And it never sounded as good as you remembered it.
If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
Would you not want to commit Suicide ?
Ah, antifreeze. Sinfully delicious...
Rules of Conduct:
#1 - The DM is always right.
#2 - If the DM is wrong, see rule #1
If the Zune 3.1 firmware turns out to be the problem, then I assume the patched version will be Zune 3.11. Hey, this sounds familiar.
So, how long before Microsoft has to beg to Congress for a bailout?
"No one will buy our products ever since the Zune Fiasco! Give us money! WA WA WA!"
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is usually crucified.
You ate a McDonald's Big Mac once. It's well known that their minimum wage employees occasionally jack off into the secret sauce. So it's perfectly fair to call you a cum guzzling jiz mop.
Do you even lift?
These aren't the 'roids you're looking for.
Then you must cut the one ring from Sauron's hand, carry it to the fire of Mt. Doom and cast it into the cauldron.
"Lack of speed can be overcome. In the worst case by patience." --Znork
And all accross this great nation of ours countless tiny screws are getting lost in the carpet.
Take the cheese to sickbay, the doctor should see it as soon as possible - B'Elanna Torres, "Learning Curve"
Played For Sure.
Never shake hands with a man you meet in a fertility clinic.
...people see Zunes commiting suicide by flying out from Ballmer's office.
@neonux
I am feeling bad because of the hardship that MSFT has to go through just because *Microsoft* did this. Had this been any other corporation (Apple for instance), there will be no fuss and fanboys will defend Apple left and right). I still love MSFT products (I see you, VS 2008) but MSFT employees are still human, right?
I have two 30GB Zunes that are affected by this. The best theory I've heard is that it is having issues with this being the 366th day of the year. Maybe all will be well again tomorrow - we'll see.
The fact that it doesn't load UI and doesn't play music doesn't mean they aren't working perfectly fine. Apparently, they just gained sentience.
It's already kind of lame when someone spells it M$ or Micro$oft in a comment but... in the summary? Childish much?
My apologies for offending your employer. Speaking of childish antics, I wonder if Steve Ballmer got a new chair for Christmas?
You had wood? Spoiled kid.
Are you kidding? When I was a kid I had wood constantly. Now that I'm [much] older I can only dream...
"terrorism" and "pedophilia" are the root passwords to the Constitution
"I felt a great disturbance in the Trends, as if thousands of people realised their Zune was broke and looked it up online."
You just got troll'd!
Then pay from memory the music.
I believe you are mistaken. To my knowledge, it is still free to remember music, but the RIAA is working with the US government to close this so-called 'neural hole'. They're really just looking after the good of the artists. Really.
.there is enough of everything for everyone.
It might be the DRM code, in which case "suicide" is appropriate.
No sig today...
I sooo hope this is related to the DRM on the device. That would totally make my day/year, as well as that of every other anti-DRM person.
Colin Dean Go a year without DRM
You bought two zunes?
but... Zune 3.11 for Workgroups
@neonux
Just one (likely) possible cause. If that is the case it should fix its self tomorrow.
Or it could be the Zune Rapture. This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't put Marilyn Manson on it.
due to lousy programming MS cant even git the Y2K bug in the right year
Every time I hear the name "Zune", for some reason I look around for sandworms.
Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
there are only 10 types of people in the world, those who get binary and
9 others that I don't care about.
Good thing I've conditioned myself to press the preview button, or I'd have to come up with some witty reply to myself explaining why I forgot to check the AC box.
In Soviet Russia, joke tells YOU!
That means that the first one purchased wasn't until well into 2007.
SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
You are overestimating the amount of zune users out there...
Seven Days with Ubuntu Unity
I sense a disturbance in the Force... It's as if tens of voices cried out in terror and were silenced.
Wait. You're implying that they sometimes do read the entries?
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
I hear Bill got him a few throw pillows for the sofa.
It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
Worst Console Ever.
Dead Movie Format
and a dead 'iPod killer' with a stupid brand name
It's hilarious in a pathetic sort of way to know there are huge numbers of diehard Microsoft fanboys out there who are actually dumb enough to own all three of those Microsoft turds.
If you're looking for a company with a history of failed product launches, look instead to Sony. With their sudden success with Blu-ray, I'm starting to think there's a chance the Cubs might win the World Series.
Oh, say does that Star-Spangled Banner entwine / The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine?
...like tears in rain.
Contrary to the popular belief, there indeed is no God.
For my next trick, there are only 10 types of people in the world, those who get binary and those who..."
... get laid?
Stop Computers/Cars Analogies on S
It's too bad you couldn't simultaneously make that joke and put yourself on the right side of the comparison....
Zune Rapture! Outstanding! One free internet for you.
Sheldon
If you follow that logic... boarding a jet liner would freak you out.
Does it?
I used to think that, but then I came back.
looks like it has had -zero- impact on the share price
Kind of like the Zune in the first place?
Look at the bright side: it is the fastest fix released by Microsoft. Ever.
a brand new Ferrari for $100, and I bought it and drove it for 20 years, then one day it just vanished into thin air
Could be pretty serious if you were doing 180mph at the time...