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Sophos Releases Klingon Language Version

Posted by ScuttleMonkey on from the a-for-effort dept.

Bantu1 writes to mention an attention grab by anti-virus company Sophos, which is now offering a Klingon language version of their popular anti-virus software. Now Qo'nos too can be completely safe from the storm. If only we could see a Sophos logo in the next Paramount endeavor, the cycle would be complete.

27 of 94 comments (clear)

  1. May I be the first to say... by Akido37 · · Score: 3, Insightful

    wtf?

    1. Re:May I be the first to say... by MozeeToby · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I'm about to commit a cardinal sin of slashdot, but I don't care.

      Bring back idle

      At least when all this worthless, not even funny 'news' was on idle, I could filter it out of my front page. Now it's in every category: news, entertainment, IT... Just put it in the corner somewhere so that those of us that don't want it don't have to see it.

    2. Re:May I be the first to say... by AKAImBatman · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Bring back idle

      FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOOOOOOO!!!!!!

      Oh, and it didn't go anywhere. It's still sitting behind the scenes, watching, waiting, getting ready to threaten our intelligence and very existence!

      As for this story however, it is actually "News for Nerds". Even if it doesn't matter.

      --
      Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade
    3. Re:May I be the first to say... by Jugalator · · Score: 2, Insightful

      wtf?

      Advertisement. And it worked!

      --
      Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
    4. Re:May I be the first to say... by nametaken · · Score: 2, Insightful

      "$Header: index.html,v 1.2 2009/05/08 14:53:14 james Web page status: Draft 0.8. Req action: Mktg to review wording and imagery (better screenshots required etc..), and QA to check links. Expected launch date: July 2009. Software status: Ready. $"

      Except oddly, it looks like this is a leak.

  2. Tribbles!!! by Raistlin77 · · Score: 3, Informative

    "Use Sophos's Klingon Anti-Virus to quickly perform an on-demand scan and find viruses, spyware, adware, zero-day threats, Betazoid sub-ether porn diallers and Tribbles that your existing protection might have missed. The software can be run without deactivating your current anti-virus software. Phasers can be left set to stun."

    Haha!

  3. Klingon Linux distro by Spy+Handler · · Score: 3, Interesting

    I would've thought the first major software with Klingon support would've been a Linux distro.

    Or is there already such a thing...?

    1. Re:Klingon Linux distro by Raistlin77 · · Score: 3, Informative

      See http://www.lanana.org/docs/unicode/unicode.txt - scroll down to "Klingon language support"...

    2. Re:Klingon Linux distro by BobMcD · · Score: 4, Funny

      This isn't really in Klingon, though, is it? It just 'brings together some of the best in Klingon art, music and applications'...

      That's all well and good, but without the language, etc, would any true Klingon actually use it?

      THIS is why Linux isn't ready for the Klingon Desktop...

    3. Re:Klingon Linux distro by realnrh · · Score: 3, Funny

      Klingons have a fondness for Windows because they hear it has lots of COM-BAT files.

      --
      Long? What do you mean the signature at the bottom of every comment I post on Slashdot is too lo
  4. Ahem. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    What pitiful Klingon would need anti-virus protection? A true warrior relishes at the opportunity to die the perfect death at the hands of Canadian Pharmacy pop-ups.

    Where can I find this dishonored warrior?

    1. Re:Ahem. by Locke2005 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Klingon reaction to virus: "Perhaps today IS a good day to have Conficker wipe out all my files!"

      --
      I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
  5. Re:Klingon's use Windows by dreemernj · · Score: 3, Funny

    Klingons don't use WIMP interfaces.

    A real warrior carves bits onto his harddrive with the tip of his Bat`leth.

    --
    1 (short ton / firkin) = 89.1432354 slugs / keg
  6. Heard in the HQ by Randseed · · Score: 4, Interesting

    "This virus has no honor! You dishonorable top'aQ! Defend yourself!"

  7. Re:Klingon's use Windows by auric_dude · · Score: 2, Funny

    No, Window's clings on despite our best efforts to flush it away.

  8. Klingon software is *NOT* released... by mangu · · Score: 2, Interesting

    ... it *escapes* leaving a bloody trail...

  9. Why? by jez9999 · · Score: 3, Insightful

    From the webpage:

    Why did we translate it into Klingon?
    <Need some blurb here> Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Duis consequat odio vel risus fermentum at hendrerit sapien malesuada. </end blurb>

    I'm guessing that's Klingon for 'God fucking knows'.

    --
    == Jez ==
    Do you miss Firefox? Try Pale Moon.
    1. Re:Why? by princessproton · · Score: 3, Informative

      It looks similar to Latin, but actually it's just frequently used nonsense placeholder text.

      --
      I'm always positive; it's my nature.
  10. Why am I so ashamed? by BobMcD · · Score: 4, Funny

    Betazoid sub-ether porn diallers

    Why am I so ashamed - to admit that this sounds pretty hot?

  11. Oh crap! by KneelBeforeZod · · Score: 3, Funny

    We've DECLOAKED!!! If only we had used anti-virus software. Noooooo!!! *kaboom*

  12. ERROR by Tablizer · · Score: 2, Funny


    ERROR: maximum geekativity threshold reached. Product STOPPED.

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  13. Re:Nothing wrong with this by russlar · · Score: 2, Informative

    Bork Bork Bork (I don't even know what that is)

    Sweedish Chef, from the Muppet Show.

    --
    Anybody want my mod points?
  14. Great business move by MobileTatsu-NJG · · Score: 5, Funny

    Bantu1 writes to mention an attention grab by anti-virus company Sophos who is now offering a Klingon language version of their popular anti-virus software.

    First time I've seen an anti-virus company release a birth control product!

    --

    "I like to lick butts!" by MobileTatsu-NJG (#32700246) (Score:5, Informative)

  15. Re:May I be the first to say... May *I* say: by davidsyes · · Score: 2, Insightful

    KAM CHE CHAMI CHEK!

    Picard: KAM CHE CHAMI CHEK!

    Gowron (smiling): You swear WELL in Klingon, Picard....

    --
    Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
  16. Product Placement by isorox · · Score: 2, Interesting

    If only we could see a Sophos logo in the next Paramount endeavor, the cycle would be complete.

    After having Kirk with a nokia mobile phone, and drinking Budweiser, I fully expect Uhura will be running emails from the Klingons through her Sophos package in the next film.

  17. Re:Klingon's use Windows by powerlord · · Score: 2, Funny

    A real warrior does not use Operating Systems that coddle you like OSX.

    A real warrior does not hide behind the security of a Linux install.

    A real warrior relishes the eternal battle between himself, his operating system and those that would cunningly infect your system.

    Windows is obviously the only choice for honorable combat.

    --
    This space for rent. All reasonable inquiries will be entertained at proprietors discretion.
  18. A few more fun things on the site by Alystair · · Score: 2, Informative

    Check out the release notes, and the source code for the page for more comedy. I wish other sites had hidden back-talk between the developers :)