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Dogs As Intelligent As Average Two-Year-Old Children
Ponca City, We love you writes "The Telegraph reports that researchers using tests originally designed to demonstrate the development of language, pre-language and basic arithmetic in human children have found that dogs are capable of understanding up to 250 words and gestures, can count up to five and can perform simple mathematical calculations putting them on par with the average two-year-old child. While most dogs understand simple commands such as sit, fetch and stay, a border collie tested by Professor Coren showed a knowledge of 200 spoken words. 'Obviously we are not going to be able to sit down and have a conversation with a dog, but like a two-year-old, they show that they can understand words and gestures,' says Professor Stanley Coren, a leading expert on canine intelligence at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver. Dogs can tell that one plus one should equal two and not one or three,' says Coren, adding that dogs 'can also deliberately deceive, which is something that young children only start developing later in their life.' Coren believes centuries of selective breeding and living alongside humans has helped to hone the intelligence of dogs. 'They may not be Einsteins, but are sure closer to humans than we thought.'"
I foresee in my magic eight ball... In a not so distant future... dog answering help desk call, giving us good support. It's true, they are the man's best friend !
Hahah...I thought you were going to say "does this additional knowledge mean that we will end up with 2 year olds sniffing for bombs and drugs?"
...my dog is a lot like Einstein, in that her hair goes everywhere and she refuses to accept quantum mechanics.
Just because you sold your soul to the devil that needn't make you a teetotaler. --The Devil and Daniel Webster
That would probably be a mistake; I'd expect most dogs to vote Democratic.
Cats, on the other hand, would be overwhelmingly Republican.
The correlation between ignorance of statistics and using "correlation is not causation" as an argument is close to 1.
...my dog is a lot like Einstein, in that her hair goes everywhere and she refuses to accept quantum mechanics.
There's no reason we can't have a Schrödinger's dog too. Try it. Whether the dog survives or not, it'll have a far greater appreciation of quantum mechanics. Note: Do not put Schrödinger dog with Schrödinger cat. Experimental results may be random.
#fuckbeta #iamslashdot #dicemustdie
does this additional knowledge mean that we will end up with dogs in other support roles?
How about a "Thinking Brain" dog for some of the terminally stupid people I have to deal with? The blind and deaf already use dogs, why not stupid people? Are you a stupid person who can't make a decision in the fast food restaurant? Dog orders you a cheeseburger. Are you so stupid that you can't decide if you should turn left or right at the stoplight? Dog tells you to turn left. Are you a dumb pedestrian who stops in the middle of the intersection to answer their cell phone? Dog drags you to the curb.
This would be GREAT!
John
But there is some breakthrough work being done on training 2-year-olds to sniff for bombs and drugs.
Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens
No one needs academic elitists from Canada telling them their own sons and daughters are no smarter than an average dog. My husband Todd showed me this article while we were playing with Trig, and I sat down and I thought to myself, boy, what's the world coming to, that if you could equate a puppy's intelligence with that of an unborn child, you could give the puppy a post-birth abortion?
And I'm telling you, when you put forth Americans in front of these scientists on Obama's health care panel, and they put your baby and an Ivy League-educate golden retriever on the scale, who do you trust they'll declare the victor? This is dystopian, this is an outrage, this is what we must fight, America!
--Sarah Palin
Well 200 words is plenty to say "Hello IT, have you tried turning it off and on again?" and "Are you sure its plugged in?"
The article says that Wolves aren't as smart and theorizes that living alongside humans has made dogs outperform wolves. It could also be that living alongside humans make dogs better at intelligence tests performed by humans. Perhaps we should get dolphins to design some intelligence tests to compare wolves and dogs and see who performs better on those.
I see you've called Dell's customer support then? Oh, wait... you said "good support"... sorry my mistake.
So a dog goes into the telegraph office and submits his message for transmission: "Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof."
The telegraph operator says, "We normally charge by the word, but if you like, I'll give you the tenth 'woof' for free."
To this, the dog responded, "But that, my good chap, would make no sense at all!"
The CB App. What's your 20?
So you can pay a dog to do your homework?
No, only to eat it.
Donate free food here
If you've ever owned a cat, you know that they are most decidedly authoritarian; namely, they are the self-appointed dictator-for-life of your home.
That's what he said, "...cats are clearly democrats."
The truth is that all men having power ought to be mistrusted. James Madison
Golden Retrievers are blond, so they're obviously stupid.
signature is pants
Seems like the bumper stickers that say "My Goldendoodle is smarter than your honor student" are correct!
These views express my own personal opinions, not those of the other voices in my head
The simplest possible explanation: Your dog is the antichrist.
Perhaps we should get dolphins to design some intelligence tests to compare wolves and dogs and see who performs better on those.
That's easy. Mice would perform the best ;) Following them would be the dolphins and in a distant third would be homo sapiens.
I want peace on earth and goodwill toward man.
We are the United States Government! We don't do that sort of thing.
"Cats, on the other hand, would be overwhelmingly Republican."
But of course - who do you think funds the Cato Institute?
You are not a brain: http://books.google.com/books?id=2oV61CeDx-YC
Dogs go on Slashdot, and cats go on 4chan. What, you didn't really think that LOLcats were the work of actual people?
You just got troll'd!
She also eats dogs?!?!
Stylish sheet to fix many problems in Slashdot's D3: https://gist.github.com/801524
Cow evolution has been driven by unnatural selection for a long time. We've sculpted the animal to be naturally docile. If the dumb tail waggin variety are more likely to reproduce curtesy of our intervention, then you get a race of big dumb cows.
Less interestingly but more practically - it's not like a cow ever came back from the slaughterhouse to warn the rest of them!
Have you ever tried to teach a 2 year old to sit?
Black labs I am convinced where bread to be the stupidest animal possible. Not because they are black, but because they where bread to jump in to freezing water, retrieve a duck, and like it. Any animal that will wag its tail after that and want to do it again is fairly dumb.
Living in Chile
One of my dogs is half Belgian Malinois Shepard (a popular K9 unit breed) and half Black Lab. She's quite literally half brilliant, half moron. She's fairly intelligent, understands lots of commands and is generally a well behaved dog... until you show her a tennis ball, frisbee, or a stick. Then the slobbering moron lab takes over and her world quite literally narrows to "must chase ball." It's pretty funny... but my next big dog is going to be ALL Belgian Shepard if I can help it.
No kidding, I've been going at this gummy bear for like three hours now. Fucking gummy bear.
Comment of the year
Well, cats can learn to use the toilet.. I've yet to see a dog do that.
Many dogs use the toilet. Just for a different purpose than we do.
Hmm, I wonder what it would be like to have a girlfriend that's intelligent, generally well behaved, etc... until you show her a ball, and then she goes to "must chase ball" mode.
I crinched when I read that. Oooh that must hurt.
-- Cheers!
You need help, mate. Seriously.
Chuck Norris: Socialism == a thousand years of darkness.
As a doctor, you should probably know that you can't have pups with a dog, neutered or not. Don't let that stop you from trying though.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.