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BlackBerry Outages Across North America

Posted by CmdrTaco on from the iphones-are-just-slow dept.

TheHappyMailAdmin writes "BlackBerry service in North America is out: no email, no BB Messenger and no web browsing. Last carrier estimate I got was 24 hours until service will be restored, with others saying they've gotten estimates from support from between 3 hours to 2 days. BES and BIS services are impacted, and it's across all carriers. Bad timing for RIM as people are wrapping up their holiday shopping..." Updated 18:11 GMT by timothy: Reader notheusualsuspect pings with a note that the service has been restored.

54 of 284 comments (clear)

  1. Works for me by jpyeron · · Score: 3, Informative

    I did a test message from/to my BB too.

    RTFA

    * FINAL UPDATE: Things are back to normal. RIM Statment to follow. ...

    1. Re:Works for me by MBGMorden · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Yeah - this skeered me (I'm the BES admin at work and sometimes it's hard to explain the difference to the powers that be that there's a difference between a failure that's our fault and a failure that's RIM's fault :)). My BB is working fine though.

      --
      "People who think they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do."-Mark Twain
    2. Re:Works for me by ari_j · · Score: 3, Funny

      It appears that, as always, Slashdot has the breaking news within minutes after it becomes outdated.

    3. Re:Works for me by Bigbutt · · Score: 4, Funny

      Actually they get their new stories via their Blackberry's.

      [John]

      --
      Shit better not happen!
    4. Re:Works for me by erroneus · · Score: 4, Informative

      It sometimes helps to explain to the powers that be with a data flow and connectivity diagram. All Blackberry traffic, especially BES traffic, flows through the Blackberry servers. So the phones are connected first to the carrier, then to the Blackberry servers, then to the BES, then to the company mail server. The company mail server is connected to the BES, which then connects to the Blackberry server network, then to the carrier, then to your phone.

      There are pluses and minuses to this arrangement. The big minus is obvious -- when Blackberry has problems, EVERYONE has problems.

      Perhaps the outage was shorter than expected. Slashdot news is never "real time" and problems are often solved before the story is ever published here.

  2. Central point of failure.. by NeuralAbyss · · Score: 5, Insightful

    RIM seems to be particularly odd in chosing an architecture that gives a single point of failure.

    Then again, given most crackberry users.. nothing of value was lost.

    1. Re:Central point of failure.. by ircmaxell · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I think it's weird requiring all services to go through a middle man. Why should I need to use a proxy for push email when my exchange server supports it directly? (If there's a real reason, please tell me because I'm curious)...

      PS. I'm a proud owner of a Droid. Push email works quite well for me on it (directly from my server). I don't see a reason (for me) to switch to Blackberry/RIM). Is there a killer feature/functionality that a BB would give me over the Droid? Is it enough of a reason to add another point of failure in the stack?

      Thanks...

      --
      If a man isn't willing to take some risk for his opinions, either his opinions are no good or he's no good
    2. Re:Central point of failure.. by netsavior · · Score: 5, Informative

      BB is essential for cwhoreporate systems, because NO OTHER PHONE ON THE MARKET ANYWHERE matches its functionality... they can issue you a phone, then enforce strong passwords, content filtering, disable cameras so you don't end up sending pictures of your Christmas party indiscretion to your whole team, etc etc. Hell I can see my internal websites (not published to the internets) on my BB because it is basically VPN'd 24x7 to my work network.

      In short, if you use your phone for email and dicking around, then the BB is one of the worst smartphones for you... if you are a corporate entity that wants to have certain employees "connected" at all times, then there is no other choice. The only confusing part to me is why people buy themselves a non-corporate blackberry.

    3. Re:Central point of failure.. by rickb928 · · Score: 5, Informative

      "The only confusing part to me is why people buy themselves a non-corporate blackberry."

      Because, as you implied in your post, BlackBerry phones 'just work'. Most of the time.

      Push e-mail? A BIS phone works splendidly. BIS handles the actual polling. Even OWA seems to work fo those of us without BB servers at the home office. Ask your favorite Android user how their POP/IMAP email is working. Full disclosure; I am an Android user, G-1 on Donut. iPhone users, I have no idea how you POP mail works, but it can't be too bad or you all would have ditched... wait, nevermind.

      Web browsing? Very well done, considering the platform, since your BES is essentially a proxy server that solves some problems and gives you an enhanced experience. BIS does this also, just not as customizable as having a BES of your own.

      BIS is a good idea, though it does expose the single-point-of-failure issue. But, consider your cell service in general:

      - Most of us forget that the first single-point-of-failure is probably a cell tower. Yep, you might have two or three that can serve you, but if the backhaul from your tower is fritzed, you might have to wait until you get paroled from that tower, and move one to one that isn't hosed.

      - The next single-point-of-failure is probably a metro area uplink for your carrier. I don't know for sure, but I suspect redundancy here is not universal.

      - God forbid your carrier is architected like T-Mobile, or your single-point-of-failure is either a GSM service that has to be responsive or your phone is doing rock imitations, or a similar CDMA. I hear CDMA doesn't have the same architecture, but if your carrier can't authenticate you to the network, u b hosed.

      RIM has had more than its share of outages over the last two years, but they have been notable because of the popularity of the platform. I ditched my BB to try Android. My wife has not been affected by either outage this month - be they natiowide or global or whatever. Her BB Curve hasn't missed a beat. Lucky I guess. And she would not like my G1, or Andriod, at all. Too much fuss. She just wants mail and minimal web when she wants it.

      Dump on RIM if you want, but their platform works very well. Outages aside, it is a superior corporate solution, and makes most other platforms look like pants. Wait, are there ANY other corporate platforms?

      --
      deleting the extra space after periods so i can stay relevant, yeah.
    4. Re:Central point of failure.. by dnaumov · · Score: 3, Informative

      BB is essential for cwhoreporate systems, because NO OTHER PHONE ON THE MARKET ANYWHERE matches its functionality... they can issue you a phone, then enforce strong passwords, content filtering, disable cameras so you don't end up sending pictures of your Christmas party indiscretion to your whole team, etc etc. Hell I can see my internal websites (not published to the internets) on my BB because it is basically VPN'd 24x7 to my work network.

      Please, don't spread misinformation. Corporate policy management (which includes EVERYTHING you have listed and a lot of other things) has been available for Nokia phones for a long long time.

    5. Re:Central point of failure.. by javilon · · Score: 4, Interesting

      if you are a corporate entity that wants to have certain employees "connected" at all times, then there is no other choice. The only confusing part to me is why people buy themselves a non-corporate blackberry.

      I agree with you, and that means the dead of Blackberry.

      When people sees it, it looks like a phone, so they assume that they can do the things people do with a phone usually. Shortly after, they find out that this is only useful for work. It means that they are available to their bosses 24x7 and they get none of the fancy gadgets that iphone and Android users have installed on their phones.

      When they realize that they would like to have another phone for personal use, they hate the blackberry and resist having one as much as possible.

      On the other hand, you have the iphone and Android. People buy them and take them to work. They manage to force the IT department to write stuff for them. There are lots of security issues, but that is what users want.

      Now, which one of the two has more future in small/medium companies right now?

      And do you think that Blackberry will be able to live if only big enterprises use its terminals?

      --


      When his defense asked, "Which computer has Jon Johansen trespassed upon?" the answer was: "His own."
    6. Re:Central point of failure.. by gregarican · · Score: 4, Informative

      As well as the iPhone. I have a handful of corporate iPhone users and can remotely wipe their phones to a clean install from an admin console on our Exchange Server.

    7. Re:Central point of failure.. by th3_ev1l_m0nk3y · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Not true at all. Microsoft's System Center Mobile Device manager does everything you listed. You could argue that the BES does it better or that the BB devices are superior to Windows Mobile devices but the fact remains the same ability to control and lock down devices as well as provide behind the firewall access is there. That said, I would say the majority of corporations using smartphones are doing so purely for email and have no desire to provide behind the firewall access nor want to lock down devices to the extent where the camera is disabled. In those cases, the company is crazy to spend the money deploying BES when any device that supports activesync can be used natively with Exchange without the need for any addidtional hardware or software.You can even use BB devices with third party software on the device that adds activesync support for a whole lot less than deploying BES.

    8. Re:Central point of failure.. by Alioth · · Score: 3, Insightful

      IMAP email (actually, IMAPS) works perfectly on my iPhone. I also have authenticated SMTP over SSL for sending - I've not had a problem with either. (I also prefer my email to be pull only - email should be something I can poll when I have time, not something that goes ping every time something arrives, so push email is a "meh" feature for me).

      --
      Oolite: Elite-like game. For Mac, Linux and Windows
    9. Re:Central point of failure.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

      As an interesting side effect, my company gives all primary/secondary on-call folks BB's. They in turn automatically get messaged whenever some process starts failing. This lead to an interesting find last night when our on-call Oracle DBA called in wanting to know why he wasn't getting any BB messages as he found one of our Auth DB's ran out of space and was failing to allow for account changes (passwd changes, account updates, etc) and he never got a message about it. This type of thing is wide spread across the entire company, everyones little app/process/product emails home to their respective BB carrying owners, as well as a laundry list of middle and upper management, and like I said the on-call folks. It seems that our company overly relied on the use of BB when it should have been obvious to also CC these emails to our local NOC in the case of an unthinkable nationwide BB outage. -Anon with good reason.

    10. Re:Central point of failure.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      Should have mentioned something else I found particularly funny. When our NOC found out about the BB outage last night, they sent an email to the BB users to inform them of this (which of course they weren't getting email).

    11. Re:Central point of failure.. by lewiscr · · Score: 2, Insightful

      And do you think that Blackberry will be able to live if only big enterprises use its terminals?

      Ask IBM.

    12. Re:Central point of failure.. by maztuhblastah · · Score: 4, Informative

      IMAP email (actually, IMAPS) works perfectly on my iPhone.

      And S/MIME support?

      It might not matter to you or to most home users/teens/hipsters/iPhone users, but S/MIME is damn crucial for a lot of government and enterprise users. The iPhone doesn't support S/MIME, nor does Android, nor does Symbian. There're no third party mail apps for the iPhone (since Apple doesn't allow "duplication of functionality"), and none (that I know of) that provide S/MIME for Android, and definitely none for S/MIME on Symbian (I know because I checked last year when I was forced to use a Symbian phone.)

      S/MIME support, along with management of the associated certs, etc. is one thing that BlackBerrys excel at and, like it or not, a reason that a lot of users choose them.

      --
      The real litigious bastards...
    13. Re:Central point of failure.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Informative

      As well as the iPhone. I have a handful of corporate iPhone users and can remotely wipe their phones to a clean install from an admin console on our Exchange Server.

      Not to the same level as BBs (at this point in time):

      http://www.wired.com/gadgetlab/2009/06/iphonesecurity/
      http://www.crunchgear.com/2009/07/23/iphone-security-broken-business-users-take-note/

      While not everyone needs that level of assurance, for those that do, RIM has gone through the effort of getting FIPS and other certifications:

      http://na.blackberry.com/eng/ataglance/security/certifications.jsp

  3. Thank you Karma by Gothmolly · · Score: 5, Funny

    BB users are the biggest type-A douchebags around. They differ from their hipster iPhone douchebag brethren by typically wearing suits, talking loudly on their phones while waiting in line, and driving faux-retro American sedans. I knew when I woke up this morning that it would be a good day, as if millions of douchebags cried out and were suddenly silenced. Merry Christmas to all.

    --
    I want to delete my account but Slashdot doesn't allow it.
    1. Re:Thank you Karma by gregarican · · Score: 4, Insightful

      True in a lot of ways. Perhaps a _brief_ outage would put people's lives in perspective. In all actuality you really aren't that important and being in constant contact with the rest of the world in real time through your hip-holstered cell phone isn't that important either.

      People seriously need a "mental health" to unplug from the grid and take a chill pill. What better time of year than right leading into the Holidays to do this?

      Reminds me of places I've done IT support. Our core billing systems, inventory systems, accounting systems, etc. would be down and it was a PITA to the end users. But god forbid if Internet or e-mail access was down. You'd think that the CHQ was on fire and Milton was running away from the scene. :-/

    2. Re:Thank you Karma by sakdoctor · · Score: 4, Funny

      I'd like to see a medium-long facebook outage.
      Certain hardcore users would get physical withdraw symptoms, coma, then death.

    3. Re:Thank you Karma by gregarican · · Score: 2, Funny

      Actually I mistyped this TLA (Three Letter Acronym). Should've been PETA. Most of the office staff would parade around wearing faux-fur coats and whine about the poor spotted owl and the mid-Atlantic one-eyed trouser trout...

    4. Re:Thank you Karma by Sponge+Bath · · Score: 3, Funny

      ...unplug from the grid and take a chill pill.

      Timothy Leary once said something similar.

    5. Re:Thank you Karma by Achromatic1978 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      The other evening I was at the movies and got an emergency email from my sister that my dad had a heart attack and was in the hospital (I had turned the ringer off, as I always do when I'm at the movies). THere were a few emails back and forth between her, me, my mother, and my brother coordinating flights, airport pickups, etc, so we could all be there at his side by Christmas.

      And yet you didn't actually think it might be a good idea to leave the movie and do all your emergency email coordination in the lobby. Instead, you stayed in the theater. Why? So you didn't miss a minute of the latest Judd Apatow film, apparently of an equal priority to your father's heart attack?

  4. The Joke's on RIM by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Interesting

    My Blackberry has once again broken so I haven't been impacted by this outage. I haven't even had time to set up BB mail on my newest replaced Crapberry.

    This is the first and last Blackberry I will ever owned, but because of Blackberry's poor quality, I'm now on my third one. Just trying to survive a 2 year contract on T-Mobile, America's worst cellphone company.

    I don't know what phone I get next (Android or iPhone) but I promise I will never own another Blackberry as long as I live.

  5. One wonders... by fuzzyfuzzyfungus · · Score: 5, Insightful

    How long RIM's model of interposing their own(seemingly rather unstable) services lasts.

    Obviously, when the carrier has some major fuckup, email/web aren't going to happen because the packets are being routed to their deaths, like so many binary lemmings, somewhere within the series of tubes.

    RIM's presence in the loop, though, seems like an increasingly useless liability. Back when Blackberries were little more than pagers, in terms of hardware spec, RIM's service made sense. Now, though, phones are powerful enough to speak the same protocols as computers. Why, if my carrier is passing packets properly, and my mailserver is up, should RIM be standing in the middle?

    1. Re:One wonders... by nine-times · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I had an argument with someone about this topic a while back. It was a BlackBerry user who was insistent that a lot of value was added by putting RIM in the middle of your conversations... something about being able to email other blackberry users directly, and their Blackberry would get it even if their mail server was down... maybe? I don't know. Didn't make sense to me. And there was the fact that it was encrypted, and that you could have it push emails to your phone instead of your phone querying the mail server. That stuff is available for normal mail servers, too, so it's not much of a win.

      I know Verizon also does (or used to do) something similar where Verizon downloads all of your email from your mail server through a desktop redirector, and then Verizon sends the email to your phone. They even encourage (or used to encourage) you to do things that way even if you have a Windows phone connecting to an Exchange server. I never understood the point of that kind of crap. Not only is it a single point of failure among all the Blackberry users, but it's an additional point of failure for each user. If my mail server is down or the carrier is down, RIM isn't making it so I keep getting mail. Plus it's an additional security risk. Why should my (or my company's) email be sent to some third-party's server unless it's absolutely necessary?

  6. Oh god no internet on my phone! by jeffmeden · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Panic panic panicpanicpanic

    Wait, I am posting this from my blackberry via BIS (RIM internet)...

    Oh well, apparently the Armageddon is still a few days off.

    1. Re:Oh god no internet on my phone! by Norsefire · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Before you decided to be a smug prick on the internet did you consider the fact that Blackberry's Internet services were down for 8 hours but are now fixed? That perhaps when the story was submitted, the service was down but due to the delay in the story reaching the front-page the service is now restored? Did you think about that?

      Of course you didn't.

      Apparently the Armageddon is still a few days off.

    2. Re:Oh god no internet on my phone! by MooseMuffin · · Score: 4, Funny

      You posted from that thing? You're braver than I thought.

      Seriously though, you didn't actually come to slashdot and navigate through the comments on the default BB browser did you?

    3. Re:Oh god no internet on my phone! by jeffmeden · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Before you decided to be a total tool did you consider the fact that I noticed the outage yesterday afternoon (when my BBMs weren't getting through), followed the situation to it's completion on crackberry.com, and just decided to post in order to get a laugh (after laughing that slashdot just now started covering the 'story' right around the same time it was over and done with)?

      Of course you didn't, you're a tool with no sense of humor. I would nickname you 'Chainsaw', but irony is probably lost on you too.

  7. No, its for being at retail.. by tjstork · · Score: 2, Insightful

    My mom uses her crackberry to text me when she's buying presents for my son. I imagine a lot of people use their blackberry's that way. So now we are back to Christmas shopping circa 1985. It's positively barbaric!

    --
    This is my sig.
    1. Re:No, its for being at retail.. by MBGMorden · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I'll admit that that's become pretty common for shopping in general. My mom is a shopaholic. She hits thrift stores, the Goodwill, yard sales, etc looking for "the deals" (I think Antiques Roadshow did this to her). Generally I just leave her be on that, but she knows that I have things that I like (old guitars, M&M's memorabilia, telescopes, etc). If she finds anything that she thinks I'd find remotely interesting I get a picture message of the item asking if she should buy it.

      While I kinda questioned the usefulness of camera phones when they first came out (and still find it hilarious that people were using those 0.3MP phones to take any pictures they want to keep), I must say that being able to instantly show someone an example of an object you're looking at over the phone is a nice thing.

      --
      "People who think they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do."-Mark Twain
    2. Re:No, its for being at retail.. by Bigbutt · · Score: 3, Interesting

      I've been doing something similar. When I had to go to the hardware store, I'd take a picture of the project and/or the problem and show it to the guy. The first few times, the guy was "wow, good idea taking a pic" but then more people started doing it and it's pretty common now.

      [John]

      --
      Shit better not happen!
  8. Re:Christmas Shopping now? Um... No. by charliebear · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Actually, Blackberry has been advertising frequently lately, and if you were thinking of buying one for a Christmas present, and hear about the outage.... maybe you reconsider.

  9. A blackberry outage? Oh my! by ratnerstar · · Score: 4, Funny

    Crap, no work emails on Christmas Eve? Whatever shall we do?

    --
    Just because you sold your soul to the devil that needn't make you a teetotaler. --The Devil and Daniel Webster
  10. Re:Fail by bmo · · Score: 3, Insightful

    The antecedent was defined in the previous sentence.

      I find your lack of reading comprehension disturbing.

    --
    BMO

  11. Re:Better late than never? by GweeDo · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Actually no, that was a failure of just BIS. This is a bigger failure that affects messenger, BES and BIS.

    --
    Unstable Apps: Our Android Apps Don't Suck
  12. IT Needs to Learn from TV by RobotRunAmok · · Score: 4, Interesting

    As a TV Master Control honcho in a previous life, I read stuff like this and I shake my head... hours?? DAYS?! In broadcasting, that's not an outage, that's a carefully orchestrated attack by space aliens. Why does anyone on the corporate management level even remotely tolerate this? What, there's not enough money changing hands over at RIM to merit hiring the right professionals and institute the proper safeguards and procedures? The infomercial that aired at 3AM on Channel 11 has a better back-up plan than RIM's entire service? It boggles...

    1. Re:IT Needs to Learn from TV by jjoelc · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Amen! I am currently working in engineering, keeping master control going at a TV station... And I would have to think real hard to come up with a system here that does not have redundancy built in. If we went off-air for that amount of time, then God himself had better be signing the paperwork! (Even then it may not help!)

    2. Re:IT Needs to Learn from TV by maxume · · Score: 2, Interesting

      My local broadcast stations have had a couple of hour plus outages since the DTV transition, so perhaps 'new' has something to do with it (some of them were because they were unhappy with coverage and they upgraded power and changed locations).

      --
      Nerd rage is the funniest rage.
    3. Re:IT Needs to Learn from TV by Rich0 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      This is why IT gets no respect.

      IT operates under the constraints given it from above.

      I'm sure my CIO gets a bonus of $5M for slashing costs, and a bonus of $5k for not having any outages that year. If the CEO reversed the incentives, we'd have a ballooning budget, but a much higher quality of service. I suspect the CEO likes it just the way it is, however.

      The important thing is for IT to be up-front about levels of quality and costs. People at work complain all the time about how fast the support team is. The support management offered to have people waiting by the phone with the expertise to solve the most complicated problems, but obviously nobody cared about that enough to pay for it.

      You get what you pay for...

    4. Re:IT Needs to Learn from TV by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      15 Years in Broadcast Engineering myself, in a top-10 market. I'm sorry, but the one-way nature of broadcasting, which is based on WWII-era technology (NTSC standard ~ 1947) is in an entirely different ballpark in terms of complexity.

      Rolling a duplicate tape or slug of an infomercial in one city doesn't quite compare to restoring and re-indexing a live database during an outage for a global service.

  13. SMTP/POP/IMAP by Pascal+Sartoretti · · Score: 3, Informative

    In the meantime, the worldwide SMTP / POP / IMAP still works fine and serves millions (if not billions) of users with standards-based protocols.

    1. Re:SMTP/POP/IMAP by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      At least with Microsoft, you don't have a single point of failure !

      Yeah, there are probably dozens of points where the Microsoft stuff can fuck up and cause you grief! That's way better!

    2. Re:SMTP/POP/IMAP by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

      so how do you get your email on your phone without opening up the POP and IMAP ports on your firewall? there are only 2 ways for this and that's RIM or Microsoft.

      Well if you want to participate in this whole intraweb messaging thing and access your email from someplace other than the console then you probably are going to be opening up those ports.

      That said, the value in RIM and Exchange ActiveSync is the sync of contacts and calendars. Something that POP and IMAP can't do.

    3. Re:SMTP/POP/IMAP by greed · · Score: 2, Insightful

      How about opening the POP3S and IMAPS ports, instead? And put some sensible password restrictions in. And use TLS SMTP with mandatory login on the SMTPS port. I have users on Palm Treo, Outlook, Apple Mail, Thunderbird, iPod Touch, and more.

      The server I run can also be set to require client SSL certificates. I believe the iPhone "Profile" feature is where this would be set up for corporate clients; when I imported my SSL CA certificate, it created a profile automatically.

    4. Re:SMTP/POP/IMAP by Pascal+Sartoretti · · Score: 2, Informative

      He is referring to Microsoft's Exchange ActiveSync protocol, which runs over https and provides push mail, calendaring, contacts, and has more management features than using IMAP(S) alone. There's no need to use any Microsoft software at all to use the protocol: it's implemented by open source products and by Google.

      No need to use any Microsoft software ? Yes. But you need to first licence ActiveSync, see here the companies who did it (and probably paid a lot of money to Microsoft). No open source software there.

      Using a (proprietary) protocol such as ActiveSync is better than relying on a single point of failure, but using a standards-based protocol would be better.

  14. Dang, I had to use my BB as a phone by frank249 · · Score: 2, Insightful

    It took me a few minutes to realize that my BBMs were not going through. I ended up just calling. Funny how after you are used to BBMing and emailing, that having to make a phone call and actually talking to someone seems to bother me.

    --

    Today's vices may be tomorrow's virtues.

  15. And yet... by ericrost · · Score: 3, Interesting

    And yet strangely I can post this comment from my 'berry.

    --
    My Babylon
  16. Re:BLACKBERRY IS US ONLY SO N.A. IS IGNORANT !! by acoustix · · Score: 5, Informative

    RIM (the company that runs the BB services) is a Canadian company that operates globally. So the original post is correct in saying North America.

    --
    "A plan fiendishly clever in its intricacies"- Homer Simpson
  17. No problems with my "Curve" on Verizon.. by the_rajah · · Score: 2, Informative

    I use Opera mini as my browser and have the gmail app for my email and calendar. That seems to avoid these problems. I've had my BB for almost a year now and like it a lot.

    --


    "Do the Right Thing. It will gratify some people and astound the rest." - Mark Twain
  18. Re:Best. Gift. Evar. by andrewd18 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Congratulations! Your most productive day in recent memory involves posting comments to Slashdot.