Jedi Master's Hand-Made Lightsaber Stolen
First time accepted submitter psiogen writes "Flynn Michael, an instructor at New York Jedi, an organization that teaches 'practical knowledge of how to use a lightsaber, left his custom-crafted blade for only a few imperial minutes, but when he returned, it was gone. From the article:'“Who steals somebody’s lightsaber? It’s like stealing someone’s toy out of the sandbox,” said Michael, the founder of New York Jedi, a stage combat performance group. “I finally got my uber custom saber, and then some jerk walks out with it."'"
>> Who steals somebody's lightsaber?
It was probably a Jawa. They'll take just about anything that isn't nailed down.
Always carries his Lightsaber with him.
I always leave my expensive prized possessions laying around in a highly populated area. Bonus points if you don't know any of these people very well.
He can buy a few hundred more after this slashvertisment (minus covering the slashdotted server costs, of course)
Another weapon in the hands of criminals. National lightsaber registration now!
dull-eyed footstool-temporary octopus
are these people allergic to vaginas?
This one still has much to learn. "This weapon is your life"
... are not the Jedi you're looking for...
You can go about your business...
Move along...
Understanding the scope of the problem is the first step on the path to true panic.
Some steals his über saber. But just his luck, his web site advertises ultra sabers. Sounds close enough to me.
Come on.
If some people are attracted to the light side, there are going to be some attracted to the dark side as well.....
As a "jedi" he should know this.
To find them he just needs to yell out "Hey Darth!!!" in a crowd.
Service guarantees Citizenship! Questions Guarantee GITMO.... Amerika Uber Alles!
For god sake NY Jedi, pay for a web designer !
A disturbence in the force I sense. Like the scream of millions of star wars fans suffering it sounds.
I always keep my lightsaber in my pants.
There is no emotion, there is peace.
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.
There is no passion, there is serenity.
There is no saber, wtf dude !?!?!
Read radical news here
At least he didn't try and take it though airport security.
Sword collectors are one thing, a Jedi instructor is... well, just kinda weird. You can't really train with an actual light saber, and you can't really choke people from a distance. Which only really leaves Ninja skills. So the best the guy can be is a a Ninja instructor, really.
Python: 'And then suddenly you have a language which says "we're all stuck with whatever the whiniest coder wants".'
His mom took it.
She said it was time to grow up, if you were old enough to drink in a bar, you are old enough to take care of your toys.
She sold it at a yard sale for $3. The guy who bought it said he was going to take the batteries out and throw the rest away.
Good thing Obi-Wan didn't set his saber down under the bar, otherwise the trilogy would have been over pretty quick.
On the website, there's a picture of the item in question, but I'm not convinced that's the light saber he's looking for.
Their may be a grammatical error, misspeling, or evn a typo in this post.
Is this not a prime candidate for Idle? :/
A true Jedi never leaves his weapon lying about to be stolen, you shall be slashdotted for this.
"If any question why we died, Tell them because our fathers lied."
Left my lightsabre outside the dairy today..... nek minnit.........
this is not a flawless plan.. this is inspiration
New York is always knowing where your light saber is.
The latest Slashdot meme.
I've also lost a lightsaber in the past.
I had a fight with my dad, and it got pretty heated. He ended up cutting off my hand, and I dropped it. I felt really shafted. It was a traumatic experience for me. It worked out in the end, as it turned out it was his lightsaber anyway, and I built my own shortly thereafter. I also got a new hand (you can't really build a lightsaber with just one hand -- I should know!)
--Luke S.
Funtime Candy Wow! - my plan for eventually conquering Japan.
> Who steals somebody’s lightsaber?
Probably his business partner so that they could get a PR piece in the media.
Its a PR stunt then?
I find your lack of faith... disturbing.
__
Men with no respect for life must never be allowed to control the ultimate instruments of death.
GW Bu
is that this dude thinks he is a Jedi Master. Also, a New Yorker who leaves valuables unguarded? Not to diss the Big Apple, I wouldn't try this in any city, well, anywhere!
The thief is the bigger wanker to be clear. However our intrepid "Jedi Master" acts like a naive kid from Tatooine.
Dont be dissing any Apples here.
Next time, inform anyone on your property that you are searching them before they leave, to see if they have stolen anything.
He if its good for the US government, why cant we all have our own little police state?
The article said they had the caught suspect on CCTV well enough already show us the picture.
Then everywhere he goes everyone will know him for what his A dirty scummy THIEF!!!
Trust once he has been slash-dotted he will never do it again.
Question: is an imperial minute longer or shorter than a parsec?
How can we continue to believe in a just universe and freedom to eat crackers if we have no ale?
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!"
as a side note, apparently this comment violated the "postercomment" compression filter and i should try less whitespace and/or less repetition. knowledge is power!
do not read this line twice.
Is this a double epic fail? 1st fail, playing with a lightsaber and pretending it to be real. Second fail, not following your own fantasy fetish and keeping it on you in case Stormtroopers happen to show up. Double Fail..
"Computers are a lot like Air Conditioners" "They both work great until you start opening Windows"
Yeah? Well I think you should go suck... hrrk.... ngnhhh... ugyh.... (thud!)
I watched one of the videos on the linked site, and he doesn't seem to be making any pretense to be teaching anything other than stage combat. So I don't think that this guy is some deluded sap who thinks that lightsaber fighting is a real skill or anything.
"16MB (fuck off, MiB fascists)" - The Mighty Buzzard
You can totally choke people from a distance, you just have to be creative. Shoot something down someone's throat, and they'll definitely choke. It's not easy, of course, but that's why you have to train.
This is my signature. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
Seriously. You valued this item enough that you had it custom made for yourself, your livelihood as a stage performer depends on it, and to some degree it represents some of your identity (being able to call yourself a Jedi, for example). Obviously this item is important. Yet you left this valuable, important item go unwatched "for a few minutes" in a NYC bar. Imagine that, something valuable disappearing in NYC *and* a bar. What are the chances?
I do not understand why you would bring such a valuable item to a bar and not lock it up, and why you would take your eyes off of a valuable item in the first place. Let me put it another way. If I go to football stadium and leave my high performance laptop on my seat while I go get some food and come back and see that the laptop is gone, should I really be that surprised?
Let me give you another case. For reasons unknown Apple employees 'lose' the prototype of the IPhone 4 in a California bar not once but twice. It could be argued that this was a publicity stunt (esp considering the offending employees were not fired) but there was no sympathy for the lost device. In fact a leading tech magazine got it and started working on a tech story on the IPhone4 specs and capabilities until Apple's lawyers persuaded the magazine to give it back to Apple. Did anyone lament the case for Apple? No, there was much mirth and glee on Slashdot on this story. Because it is outrageous and stupid.
You compare this the childish behavior of someone stealing your toy. Respectfully I would disagree and this is the very adult behavior of someone stealing some valuable property. I do not cheer for thieves of any kind, from burglars, pickpockets, muggers, or carjackers. Part of being adult (and one that most people learn as a child) is that there are certain actions that you can take to lessen your risk. This means that we as adults learn to lock our doors and buy home security systems, we don't walk around with money sticking out of pockets, we watch out for dangerous situations, and we are generally careful with the items that we don't want to lose. You did not do this. So while I will not cheer for the thief in this situation, I also will not sympathize much with you either.
I also don't understand why you would publish the incident to the world. You already know who did it (you have them on video, and have confronted them), you know where it is (this isn't a worldwide issue), and you have taken initial action on it (put up flyers around the area). If you still feel a need for action take them to small claims court. Slashdot is not the right tool for your situation.
Everyone (including me) has lost valuable items and has learned an unpleasant truth from it. I wish you the best of luck in getting your lightsaber back.
Reporting a $400 lightsaber theft nets the troupe $10,000 in free publicity--a simple jedi mind trick that only works on the weak-minded consumers of media. Oh, wait a second...
Chances are someone there just had an identical one and walked off with it by mistake. I mean, doesn't everyone have a lightsaber nowadays?
you can't really choke people from a distance
Sure I can.
Sword collectors are one thing, a Jedi instructor is... well, just kinda weird. You can't really train with an actual light saber, and you can't really choke people from a distance. Which only really leaves Ninja skills. So the best the guy can be is a a Ninja instructor, really.
Actually you can choke someone from a distance. Oh you mean like Darth Vader does. No you can't do that.
As for teaching people to swing a lightsaber around, her is still teaching them basic swordsmanship. Don't scoff, they might be your salvation in the zombie apocalypse.
"and you can't really choke people from a distance."
I see you've never smelled one of "those" farts.
Bosch, I've flown one one side of the galaxy to the other and I've never seen anything that led me to believe there's some all powerful force controlling everything. It's all a bunch of simple tricks and nonsense.
Tic-Tac-Toe, Global Thermonuclear War, and relationships all have the same winning move.
that I do not decrement it further."
I'd be checking Mos Eisley Sapceport and see if someone is trying to pawn it. Ive been told that you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.
Clearly the work of a Sith.
But which was it, the master or the apprentice?
I guess today is a passable day to die.
.. since they ALL seem to somehow ALWAYS loose their lightsabers.
The three laws of thermodynamics:(1) You can't win. (2) You can't break even. (3) You can't even quit.
Stage fighting. This is something coming up all over. It's a pity that a custom lightsaber is stolen like that, though. The people over at Ultrasabers make nice stuff, and it can get quite expensive for their high-end models (lighting, on-hit effects, sound, the whole shebang). Clearly, someone saw some bling to be had.
And to be fair, thanks to the expanded universe there are 7 different forms of Lightsaber combat based on real-world sword-based martial arts. One form of Lightsaber combat is as different from another as European fencing is as different from Kendo.
The most readily apparent example is Obi-Wan (who uses a style similar to Chinese straight sword arts) versus Dooku (who uses a European fencing sort of style, cape and all).
Random Thoughts From A Diseased Mind (Not For Dummies)
The first on-topic post I have to /. in years and I forget to log in.
All Jedi have to swear an oath of celibacy.
Which makes the sword fighting ridiculous very soon. In real sword fighting you are not aiming for the sword, you are aiming to kill your opponent in a single strike. One not blocked strike and you are out. There is no reason that this should be different in light saber arts.
Maybe they try to prevent damage to their custom weapons...well... it all depends on The Force,,,,
Not as funny as people who make their own lightsabres for stage performances.
Well since his light saber was stolen, I guess this proves his school a sham. Any Jedi master worth his salt would have felt a disturbance in the force the moment someone touched his light saber.
I am Bennett Haselton! I am Bennett Haselton!
Can't he just say...
Oh, wait. Wrong fictional universe that people take too seriously.
Blocking the opponent's weapon becomes much more important when they're just as likely to kill or seriously maim you if you first hit doesn't kill them outright.
Next time, be sure you lock the door to your parent's basement.
But he will never lose his virginity!
At least this way his 'school' got slashdotted.
And Yoda who uses "anime action hero FUCK PHYSICS" style.
"When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
Someone just modified a gaudy beer keg tap and sold it to this sucker for extra cash.
"When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
Lightsaber builders usually piss me off. Not because of their wonton nerdishness, that I can deal with, and not really this guy in particular because the handle looks to be custom lathed, but the ones who scour eBay for perfectly good Speed Graphic strobes and destroy them by turning them in to props.
Yeah, I get that the original was made from Speed Graphic parts, but god damn kids, those are rare enough today without every Gishlain, Dick, and Harry trying to snap them up for re-purposing. Leave the originals for us Speed Graphic owners!
Swords would be largely useless in a zombie apocalypse, because you can't use them without closing to melee range, which is highly inadvisable. What you want in that scenario is a semi-automatic bolas-firing weapon (or possibly antimatter bullets).
Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
And Yoda who uses "anime action hero FUCK PHYSICS" style.
Let's not forget this droid-wannabe. He could, uh, spin his lightsaber "collection" really fast...
Oblig. Plinkett.
Geeks like to think that they can ignore politics, you can leave politics alone, but politics won't leave you alone.-rms
Watch Tartakovsky's Clone Wars miniseries. It's better than the prequels and you get to see Grievous fighting like a badass instead of flailing his swords threateningly just minutes before he's killed.
"When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
So I don't think that this guy is some deluded sap who thinks that lightsaber fighting is a real skill or anything.
I'm not so sure. He does admit it's stage fighting. However, he refers to himself as a "Grand Master" (of fake sword fighting...) and is quoted in the article as stating “We’re teaching people how to be heroes, and I need it back.” Seems pretty deluded to me...
grenades then?