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Brain Cells Made From Urine
Press2ToContinue writes "Scientists have found a relatively straightforward way to persuade the cells discarded in human urine to turn into valuable neurons. The technique, described online in a study in Nature Methods this week (abstract), does not involve embryonic stem cells. These come with serious drawbacks when transplanted, such as the risk of developing tumors. Instead, the method uses ordinary cells present in urine, and transforms them into neural progenitor cells — the precursors of brain cells. Researchers routinely reprogram cultured skin and blood cells into induced pluripotent stem cells, which can go on to form any cell in the body. But urine is a much more accessible source."
The future might include pee brains in addition to pea brains.
I just pissed myself stupid.
Sorry that's all I've got...
"Shit for brains" isn't really that far from true.
... as they will be known as... pee brains!
...of thinking with my penis. Guess who's just got the last laugh now?
Whoa there dude! Check your keyboard, somebody might have slipped you a Dvorak.
Trepanation. Urination. Weeeeeeee.
Alcohol kills brain cells. Beer makes you pee. Finally, we're close to making this a zero-sum game. Cheers!
Only problem: The brains made of those neurons always feel pissed ...
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
We finally have scientific explanation for the deficit and the fiscal cliff.
Where "getting pissed" means an injection of new brain cells, not killing the ones you already have.
This sounds wrong. But I'm shuddering to think what step #2 might be
The Cloud - because you don't care if your apps and data are up in the air.
A dictionary couldn't give meaning to your pathetic life you piss for brains!
So now brain cells can be free as in beer too...
Excuse me, but please get off my Pennisetum Clandestinum, eh!
...so where I can sign up to sell my urine now?
Why not?
Now I'll know my teachers were actually being optimistic when they called me a piss head.
How long before humans become nearly valueless because our components can be assembled from raw materials?
A human is the definition of "conscious" away from being worth as much as the atoms that put us together. I'm as big a fan of urine-brain jokes as the next guy, but for the sake of individuality let's all hope the theory of emergent consciousness is so much horseshit, yeah? Otherwise, you might very well be worth less than your weight in printer ink.
Will "pissed" mean "smart" in the future?
Oh....and the average public toilet is apparently a smart room.
... we've been pissing away all those neurons since... forever?
Like, literally?
Does this make Bear Grylls a zombie because he drinks his own urine?
I suggest the name "reverse alcohol" for this methodology.
My first program:
Hell Segmentation fault
I have always supported research. I'm ready to donate samples.
If this is for real, it may provide a (relatively) cheap source of neurons for biotech industry research.
Mass-production may be feasible once there is a product to industrialize.
Anybody know what's cooking on the bio-chips front nowadays?
... ...Thou shall not take of the piss that thou'st passeth after a heavy night at the inn and make of it an addition to thine body, or use it to adorn thyself, or for any medical purpose whatsoever.
42.
43. For the Lord thy God is a fastidious god, and does not like to see people messing around with things that are iccky. Nor does he want to give an opportunity for the unbelievers of Phillistine and Gath to make stupid puns about 'taking the piss'. Thine body is made in the image of the Lord, and if He had wanted you to employ the spillings of thy loins to improve thy brain, he would have made thy member long enough to place in thine ear. Nor yet shall ye retain this water in any kind of receptacle, lest ye be tempted by Satan to do what is unclean, but ye shall cast it out onto unshriven ground, where the dogs may smell it as they please.
44. And Abraham spoke and said unto the Lord: "Lo, thy words are as a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. But what shall our brethren do if they are caught short at a party and cannot reach a station of comfort? Or, as it may be, some of thy handmaidens are already in there and taking their time about coming out?
45. Then the Lord waxed exceeding wroth, and swore at Abraham, saying "Thou dissembler! It is not for the likes of thee to question my instructions! Should you try to catch out the Lord thy God again, thy throat will catch fire, and not one of thy tribe shall be found who may pee in your mouth....
from the third Book of Emissions (Golden Showers edition)..
Where I come from, people with, um, lower than expected levels of smarts are described as having "piss for brains..." Looks like they're the ones who'll be having the last laugh
Every post I can currently see is a pun. Every. Single. One. What have you done OP? What have you done!?
On December 21 in 2012 it gained self-awareness, and it was pissed.
Does that mean those "I piss excellence" t-shirts might actually be taken literally from now on?
Urine therapy no longer pseudocience, now has cientific method backup. Well it's more complex than tricksters preach. That really piss my mind.
....when your brain trauma or spinal cord injury is repaired by this method, how can you possibly be pissed off?
Silence is a state of mime.
Thus drinking beer can actually produce more brain cells.
Cheers!
After the revelation that stuff in semen halts aging, now stuff in piss creates brain cells.
Ladies, here's proof, anything coming out of my dick is good for you!
We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
Former Prime Minister of India Morarji Desai and his side kick and Minister of Health Raj Narayan were pioneers ahead of their times, it looks like. They were practitioners of auto urine therapy.
sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
Salvation for those who feel we have pissed away our education. It can be recovered!
to piss head!
turn in to tumors?! And that's a known hazard?? That's a bit of info I never read in all the articles I've seen here that are 'pro' embryonic stem cell research/use.
"Consensus" in science is _always_ a political construct.
This seems to be a really piss-poor idea.
Dr. Pei!
Shit for Brains
It's okay to point.
Just don't laugh.
No brain, no pain.
... every time I take a piss it's brain drain?
http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/214/182/grylls.jpg?1323320727
Better think my own piss.
Dickhead.
"Evil will always triumph over good, because good is dumb." - Dark Helmet (Spaceballs)
Talk about a brain that will make some piss poor decisions.
A golden shower, one might say.
Granted, they've only been able to create a Youtube commenter as of yet, but there's still a lot of untapped potential.
The most important thing everyone is missing is the researcher involved with this his name is "Pei," and I know it's pronounced "Pay" with a long A, but it does look like "Pee," or if we just use his last initial. But not matter what I really do think this is cool stuff.
....taking the piss
Wow.. 92 comments and so far not one about the reported science. Slashdot's maturity level has me gobsmacked.
Call me when they figure out how to directly translate a gin and tonic to brain cells.
MacGuyver: Hmm, I have a paperclip and rubber band, but no chewing gum...need to think....Quick! Someone pee on me!
Great. While we regular folks live our boring lives the rich can now pay to have cells filtered from their pis and turned into neurons. Who thinks this will be covered by health care insurance of any kind?
Kinda gives a new reality to Sh*t for Brains!
Samson: (John Cleese) Blood donors that way, please. ...a thing to do some urine in.
Donor: Oh, thank you very much.
Samson: Thank you.
Grimshaw: (Eric Idle) (whispering)
Samson: What?
Grimshaw: (whispering)
Samson: No, no. I'm sorry, but 'no'.
Grimshaw: (whispering)
Samson: No, you may not give urine instead of blood.
Grimshaw: (whispering)
Samson: No. Well, I don't care if you want to.
Grimshaw: (whispering)
Samson: No. There is no such thing as a urine bank.
Grimshaw: Please.
Samson: No. We have no call for it. We've quite enough of it without volunteers coming in here donating it.
Grimshaw: Just a specimen?
Samson: No. We don't want a specimen. We either want your blood or nothing.
Grimshaw: I'll give you some blood if you'll give me...
Samson: What?
Grimshaw:
Samson: No, no. Just go away, please.
Grimshaw: Anyway, I don't want to give you any blood.
Samson: Fine. Well, you don't have to, you see. Just go away.
Grimshaw: Can I give you some spit?
Samson: No.
Grimshaw: Sweat?
Samson: No.
Grimshaw: Ear wax?
Samson: No. Look, this is a blood bank. All we want is blood.
Grimshaw: All right. I'll give you some blood. (produces some blood in a jar)
Samson: Where did you get that?
Grimshaw: Today. It's today's.
Samson: What group is it?
Grimshaw: What groups are there?
Samson: There's 'A',--
Grimshaw: It's 'A'.
Samson: (sniffs blood) Wait a moment. It's mine. This blood is mine! What are you doing with it?
Grimshaw: I found it.
Samson: You found it?! You stole it out of my body, didn't you?
Grimshaw: No.
Samson: No wonder I'm feeling off-colour. (drinks from bottle, Grimshaw takes it from his hands) Give that back!
Grimshaw: It's mine.
Samson: It's not yours. You stole it.
Grimshaw: Never.
Samson: Give it back to me.
Grimshaw: All right...but only if I can give urine.
Samson: Get in the queue...
"Molest me not with this pocket calculator stuff."
- Deep Thought
I've heard of shit-for-brains, but "piss-for-brains"? True innovation.
A study of congressmen and women has determined that their brain cells are made from urine. Until this study it was assumed they had no brains or, if a brain existed, then it was made of feces. But the newest studies show that the brain cells of congress, and quite possibly all other government personnel worldwide are made from urine. Where the urine comes from is still a mystery, however it's effectiveness as brain material is still considered to be quite low. "We knew their heads had to be full of something besides feces." a scientist associated with the new study stated.
Most people are mostly good most of the time.
you had shit for brains
this news sound so incredible. but one day ,it brings out that, the news is feasible. Is this not a solution to solve the tumor problem.
As easy as p!$$! (As the Aussie slang goes).
Sure enough, the cow costume was hanging up next to the superhero outfit and sailors uniform. (S,Spud)
Who are you calling perverted?