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Han Solo To Reportedly Return For Star Wars VII
eldavojohn writes "El Mayimbe (who has a history of scooping movie news) has been picked up by Fox News Latino as claiming that Harrison Ford is confirmed to return for Star Wars VII (about 7 minutes in)."
But Han shot him first. In the face. Repeatedly.
Yes, but why was it dying? I'm convinced it's declining health was largely due to no one having the balls to tell George Lucas what parts of his movies were salvageable and which parts were absolutely shit.
Like, anyone working on Episode one. Pod racing specifically. Anyone say "Hey, uh, maybe we cut pod racing down to a few minutes. Or out entirely?" Jar Jar Binks. Anyone mention to George that putting a minstrel in Star Wars was idiotic? No, of course not. He's fucking George Lucas. Nevermind that he had a lot of help making the movies that were decent.
.. cause really - he's just too good for what Star Wars has become.
Well he was part of what Indiana Jones has become.
the pod race was the most entertaining part of the entire film.
The guy who said the election was rigged won the presidency with the second-most votes.
Why is that child allowed to act?
What movie has he not screwed up?
He destroyed Indiana Jones, he got more screen time than the hot girl or the robots in transformers, and he still can't act.
There's a new Death Star being built by the remnants of the trade federation army, being led by a young and brash Jedi (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who's being turned by the haunting apparitions of Emperor Palpatine and Count Dooku. To test their new, fully operational battle station, they use it to blow up Corellia, killing most of the inhabitants. As the Millennium Falcon sweeps in, piloted by Chewbacca and his protegee (Shia LaBeouf), to see if anyone survived, it's hit by a largish rectanguar piece of debris, causing the Falcon to yet again lose its precarious sensor dish. The Falcon sweeps around to see what hit them and pick it up, and they discover that Han Solo survived. He escaped in a Corellian intergalactic-class refrigerator that was flung from the explosion at less than 4 parsecs.
It doesn't hurt to be nice.
The problem was that Lucas was too rich and too capable of doing whatever he wanted regardless of input. It was a hard fast rule of the original trilogy that the better the film, the less Lucas directly had to do with it. The problem with the prequels is that Lucas was deeply involved. He was literally able, especially by the prequels, to do anything he wanted it, and did it all to excess. The prequels had every flaw in Lucas's inabilities with plotting and dialogue that the old films did, but magnified many times over.
But worst of all, even under good direction, I think the prequels would have been lame. We already knew the outline of what had happened; that the Old Republic fell, that the Emperor perverted Anakin Skywalker into Darth Vader, that Skywalker's children had been separated so that the Emperor could not gain both of them. The prequels were inevitably going to be little more than a "fill in the blanks" exercise, and would be necessarily anticlimactic. But Lucas could even do that exercise right; throwing in midichlorians, pointless characters, theme worlds and dull chase scenes, not to mention not even being able to stick to the elements of the story line as they stood at the end of RotJ. One of the most jarring things to me was Padme dying immediately after giving birth to Luke and Leia, when we know from RotJ that Leia was old enough to vaguely remember her mother.
I have some hope that a return of the original main characters and under solid new direction with writers not hampered by Lucas's problems and desire to transform Star Wars from Hidden Fortress In Space to some sort of political statement, this new trilogy can at least recapture some of the old spirit.
The world's burning. Moped Jesus spotted on I50. Details at 11.
What??? No pod racing? You don't understand the Star Wars formula. Every movie has to have a vertigo inducing chase that forces some of us to turn away from the big screen.
IV -- trench run attack on the Death Star.
V -- attack on Hoth, cockpit views
VI -- speeders through the forest (actually redwoods in NorCal, which everyone should visit at least once)
Pod racing held true to the formula. Unfortunately, I was so turned off by everything *else* in that movie that I couldn't muster the interest to see the others. I don't know if they had good big screen freek-out chases or not. That was just part of the beauty of those movies though. They could give you the 3-d freakout without glasses.
For all intensive purposes, "whom" is no longer a word. That begs the question, "who cares"?
Star Wars may be the brainchild of Lucas, but Gary Kurtz is what gave it its soul. My theory is that once Kurtz and Lucas split after Empire, the franchise was toast. Kurtz wanted Jedi to be much darker, Lando and the Falcon were to be destroyed during the battle, and no happy teddy bear celebration at the end. In my mind, this would have been a much more powerful film.
If you look at the tone of Jedi, especially the Ewoks, it is easy to see that Lucas was starting to get no critical feedback of his ideas. Kurtz filled this role. Without him, the franchise falls apart and we wind up with the crap that was the prequels. Lucas is a terrible director on his own. Just awful.
This is why I have high hopes for Ep. 7- Lucas is out the door, and Abrams probably understands what Star Wars means to the fans better than Lucas ever did. I just hope that Ford's role isn't too similar to Nemoy's role in Abram's Star Trek movie... a star cameo that helps our protagonist when he needs it most.
Nobody told Christopher Nolan how awful the last Batman film was with like, 90 minutes of pure pablum.
Nobody told Peter Jackson how awful The Hobbit, episode 1 was with like, 2 hours of pure cgi wanking.
Nobody told JJ Abrams how completely ridiculous the screenplay to Star Trek was by... AGAIN!!! using time travel... and Spock Prime(Spock Prime? What is that, where you get your time travel even faster?)
We have entered a new realm here, a realm where directors ruin films that could be great, but end up ok, or passable.
Why?
Because they can't help themselves, and there is an "Emperor Wears no Clothes" mindset with these guys.
We play the game with the bravery of being out of range
I am old enough to remember watching Episode IV in the theater in its first run in 1977 (mainly remember my dad going "Wow!" a lot). And yes, when I was a kid, Star Wars was the THING. I remember my dad buying my brother and I our first figurines; Darth Vader, Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Obiwan, Chewbacca , Princess Leia and a Storm Trooper, in the days before toys had to be safe and they came with little tiny detachable guns. I was very popular when I brought them to school.
I recently rewatched all six films from prequels through to original trilogy. I'll freely admit that Episode IV is pretty cheesy, but no worse than your average cowboy film, and part of its charm lies in the underlying goofiness. The most awkward parts of the first film are the Jedi mysticism, and I can imagine Alec Guinness coughing on some of the neo-hippy lines Obiwan was spouting. The second one, other than the Hoth battle which went on a little long, is by far still the best. In RotJ, the whole Jabba's Palace sequence just takes too long, but once we're into the action, it's a pretty decent film with an ending that ties up the loose ends.
The prequels just don't stand up. Elements are not bad, in particular Ewan McGregor's casting as Obiwan and the return of Ian McDiarmid as Palpatine. I won't go into how awful Jar Jar is, or how bad an actor Hayden Christensen is. Suffice it to say that, pull all the flash, and these are inferior works made by a guy who had made what was originally a whiz-bang set of adventure films with characters that you could care about, and turned into a ponderous bad-dialogue laden set of films where you really couldn't give a shit by the end if Padme died or whether Anakin became Darth Vader or not.
The world's burning. Moped Jesus spotted on I50. Details at 11.
Both Han Solo and Indie are action heroes though, and I mean let's face it, not too many people in their 70s make for an inspiring action hero. They can play almost any other role but there's a physical element to the two fisted pulp role.
Obviously Sean Connery is the exception to that rule.
Actually, a 70-year-old Han Solo sounds like an interesting character. I wonder where the hero of the rebellion would end up, 40 years later. If the screenwriters have the creativity and freedom to actually develop the character, that is. More likely we'll see a 70-year-old version of exactly the same 30-year-old smuggler, which would be a sad joke.
[Sir Garlon] is the marvellest knight that is now living, for he destroyeth many good knights, for he goeth invisible.
All the over-the-top criticisms about how much George Lucas sucked and how anyone could do a better job and how he's just milking the franchise (6 moves in 30 years and a handful of TV projects?). You're about to get pile drived by reality. You're going to see what it looks like when a corporation REALLY milks a franchise to get their 4 billion back in one CEO terms. You're going to see what a REAL mass-appeal version of Star Wars looks like with Disney-developed child stars and some schmuck producer's pet actress/mistress on the billboard. And, unlike the prequels, you're REALLY going to find out what it feels like to turn your back on a franchise instead of nerd raging about how you will after your last ThinkGeek purchase.
I swear to God...I swear to God! That is NOT how you treat your human!
When as old as Han Solo you get, look as good you will not.
"Wait. Something's happening. It's opening up! My God, it's full of apricots!"
.. cause really - he's just too good for what Star Wars has become.
He belongs in a museum!
how many pairs of boxer shorts should you own?
Both Han Solo and Indie are action heroes though, and I mean let's face it, not too many people in their 70s make for an inspiring action hero. They can play almost any other role but there's a physical element to the two fisted pulp role.
Obviously Sean Connery is the exception to that rule.
Alec Guinness pulled it off as old Ben Kenobi in Episode 4. They are after all swinging light sabers not steel broadswords. :-)
Aren't they moving into the next generation of characters? It is pretty easy for them to play their characters aged the same as the actors are, han grows up in the star wars world the same way harrison ford does.
Don't forget Bruce Willis, who just did the fifth Die Hard movie. He's gotta be an old fart by now.
Ok, I am confused. Is the example of the Die Hard 5 movies supposed to support or counter the parent's point of view. Please clarify.
Luke: Do you remember your mother? Your real mother?
Leia: Just a little bit. She died when I was very young.
Luke: What do you remember?
Leia: Just images, really. Feelings.
Luke: Tell me.
Leia: She was very beautiful. Kind, but sad.
Leia, by then, more than likely knew she was adopted. Bail Organa would have told her. Otherwise, when Luke said "your real mother" I presume that Leia would have been all "WTF do you mean, my REAL mother??"
Dream as if you'll live forever.
Live as if you'll die tomorrow.
~Anonymous~
Alec Guinness pulled it off as old Ben Kenobi in Episode 4.
"Episode 4?" F*ck off. Guinness pulled it off in Star Wars. Now get off my lawn.
Oh and BTW, Guinness's age when Star Wars was released? 63. Ford turned 63 in 2005.
I think he's referring to the original theatrical release where the episode number and title were not present. It was presented as "Star Wars". If I am not mistaken, the episode number and title, A New Hope, we added on subsequent at-home releases.
The very first cut did NOT have Episode IV in the crawl, because Fox made Lucas take it out. In every subsequent printing, he inserted it back in without telling them.
Kids these days! I was there, I was 11, it was just "Star Wars" and supposed to be a one-off, and only when we sat down and saw the crawl for Empire did we find out we're in the middle of a nine-part trilogy of trilogies, subsequently pared back to a hexology.
Whaddya mean, Han shot "first"? Han was the *only* one who shot.
DIE HARD OF HEARING
WHAT?!?!