Hackers, Gamers and Tech Workers: The UK Needs You For a New Cyber Army
girlmad writes "The UK government is looking to recruit IT experts for a cyber reserves army, which will help it defend against the threat of cyber warfare. 'This is an exciting opportunity for internet experts in industry to put their skills to good use for the nation, protecting our vital computer systems and capabilities,' said the Ministry of Defence. The reserve unit will cover a range of military cyber tactics, including a strike capability to augment the UK's military prowess."
Since gamers today are basically anyone who has the utterly amazing skill of being able to get bored long enough to reach for a CD, how about we leave them off the listed of request people, thanks.
Just like the video games.
Riiiiiighttttt... they're asking all "potential troublemakers" to come on in and get on their big, happy, new list. Just wait, some day the long knives will come out.
I deny that I have not avoided attaining the opposite of that which I do not want.
Awesome! So where can people from the USA sign up?
Wow, I don't envy anybody the job of sifting through that mountain of applicants who are all self professed l337 hax0rs.
As Grouch Marx said, I donâ(TM)t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member -- and this group is likely going to self-select for some strange people.
Lost at C:>. Found at C.
The original announcement had no mention of gamers. Looks like it's just The Inquirer making crap up.
The Cyber Reserve offers a challenge that you can get nowhere else.
ROTFLOL
nosig today
If you're good enough to work in this so called "cyber security", bare in mind the crimes of NSA and GCHQ against the entire planet, you'd be better off being on the good guys side, the side of everyday people.
Take Nobody's Word For It.
Dear UK,
Chinese hackers in your system? Some troublemaker from the inner city poking around in a highly classified file network? Just dont like what some guy from the internet is doing on your home page?
For the low low price of 1 billion dollars, I will give you the solution to your problems! DISCLAMER: By reading below you are utilizing my advancted technique and agree to make payment in full to myself. Thank you.
Step 1:
Unplug the machine.
Problem solved. I will be expecting my payment shortly. Thank you.
What a waste of money. The UK govt should, of all people, be aware that at some point in the future the Doctor will need to be called in to eradicate this "army of cybermen".
Well, I'm in, as long as you have a job waiting for me in the private sector too. This country is a sinking ship. We aren't willing to pay top dollar for talent, instead going for saturating the market with immigrant visas to drive labor prices down. We've got a crazy patent and copyright system that all but eliminates opportunity for startups. If signing up for some 'cyber reserve army' is what's needed to have a job that pays the bills, good health care, and a home in a low-crime area, I'm not gonna waste any time... I'll pack my bags and be there inside a month.
Right now, our own 'cyber army' seems more intent on considering its own citizens the enemy; At least from what I've seen in the UK they have similar levels of surveillance but are far more subdued in their... zeal... for punishing people caught in their dragnets. It's not much, but it's something. Taken as a whole, I think it would be a better quality of life to be a British citizen than a US one. Plus, they still have a middle class.
#fuckbeta #iamslashdot #dicemustdie
Want to get the hackers on your side? Create a legal environment where whitehats can work safely. Put bounties on your critical systems. Suddenly all the unruly script kiddies will work for you, testing your security.
For thousands of years, governments have played the "My penis is bigger than your penis!" game with each other, in a constant battle of penis envy and superiority.
Setiously-- "I invent the spear! See how my new spear can kill this great big bear! You and your little rock are no match for me!" evolves into everyone having spears, mostly to keep the initial inventors from bullying everyone else, which then leads to the invention of the bow-- "Ah HAH! Now I can shoot really far, and kill the bear from a great distance! You and your spear are no match for me now!"
On and on and on.
The US and the NSA have their pants pulled down by a whisleblower who said that the NSA was going overboard on stroking and enlarging its ePenis, and "Cyber warfare, and surveilance capabilities."
Result? EVERY OTHER BUCH OF COCKSUCKERS ON THE FUCKING PLANET feels compelled to make their ePeens JUST as big and nasty, so they dont look like weak little girls or something. "Oh, we cannot allow them to have ePenis superiority! We MUST have an ePenis as big or maybe EVEN BIGGER than thiers!"
The world learned FUCKING NOTHING from the cold war. Stockpiles of devices able to return the whole human race to the fucking stone age, between to behemoths on either side of the planet, arguing over who had the biggest dildo in thier pocket.
Nowhere is there a "No, we insist you dismantle and destroy your ePenis at once, or we will boot your fucking ass out of the rest of the internet" type reaction. it has ALWAYS been "Oh no! His is bigger than mine! I feel so inadequate now! OOOHHH !! I must make mine bigger!" instead.
Once the EU does this, and people sign on, it will only be mere weeks before a huge flurry of other countries that SHOULD know better all jump on the same hell bound handbasket, and take the ride.
Again, the REAL charge should be to cut the US's trunk lines, and then create a new regulatory body to coordinate the rest of the network. Fun fact about IP networks-- THEY STAY WORKING when part is cut out. Let's see it engage in its "Cyber security" hysterionics, when all the undersea cables and microwave uplinks to the US are cut, FROM THE OUTSIDE, and the whole damned country is treated like a black hole.
But no. "WE MUST HAVE A BIGGER EPEEN!" it is.
I'm just asking why we would want to help suppress freedom in the UK?
And by we, I mean the half of my friends who hold UK citizenship.
-- Tigger warning: This post may contain tiggers! --
From the source, and I'll add some commentary.
We are seeking to recruit from three areas: regular personnel leaving the service; current and former reservists; and individuals with no previous military service
In other words, they take anyone.
As well as employing reserves under current terms and conditions of service, the Cyber Reserve will be running a pilot scheme to evaluate innovative and inclusive approaches to recruiting, training, and employment.
Emphasis mine, but I think that's enough to question what you are getting into.
* possess verifiable exceptional cyber skills (*)
* be aged 18 or over
* be a UK or Commonwealth Citizen
* have lived in the UK for the last 5 years
* be able to commit to the minimum annual training
* be willing to undergo and pass a security clearance process
* use spare time and weekends in order to support defence’s cyber security mission
Nothing too odd here, but it appears that you are going to working for free. Also, "cyber skills" really means squat. I'm sure they will give you a test...
The Cyber Reserve offers a challenge that you can get nowhere else.
Except for the US, the current UK version of NSA, the current version of the German NSA, the Italian version of the NSA, etc.. etc.. blah blah and yes, even Russia has one of those. Not unique, and only challenging to your morals in most cases.
It would be cool if nobody in the UK signed up, but I know that the UK plays on patriotism and "terror" as much as the USA does. So the race is full speed for who is the biggest dickhead country, the US or UK. Good luck over there across the pond.
-The wise argue that there are few absolutes, the fool argues that there are no probabilities.
So what are you going to do, drop by a few days each year for reserve training and if you're ever called into action you'll be issued your standard script kiddie pack? Hand a bunch of guys semi-automatic rifles and they'll be a decent fighting force but I don't see "cyberwarriors" functioning the same way...
Live today, because you never know what tomorrow brings
I was wondering how long before they organized the cyber equivalent of the Hitler Youth.
Sounds like the UK is trying to restaff GHCQ with anyone who will take the job and young enough to be assimil^H^H^H trained correctly.
Join the Slashcott! Feb 10 thru Feb 17!
Because IT experts sure as hell can't find a job anywhere else.
This so reminded me of George Carlin's bit: "What? they have bigger dicks?!....BOMB THEM!"
What's today is being considered "legal" by the current regime, tomorrow might be serious criminal offense.
Well, I'm not sure about the effectiveness of this motive. What I think we need is an open source replacement for such "cyber army". As a US resident, if our government decided to involve citizens I'd sign up and help teach folks how to it secure their systems for free. Hell, I've voluneered at community centers already to do just that.
With a bit of state funding we could set up "crackathons" where government and businesses and citizens cooperated to test the security of our online infrastructures. Companies could pridefully display, "Withstood nations best hacker league for 3 hours!"... or maybe not... At least the bugs would get discovered (and fixed) and we could strengthen our "cyber defense" without criminalizing citizens. I mean, hackers are folks who love technology. If the governments want to have better "cyber capabilities" they need to decriminalize responsibly reported (or even accidental) penetration testing, and engage the populous. It's the information age... Shouldn't they be breeding better cyber soldiers, instead of stifling the pool from which they hope to hire?
The UK is being fucking daft: It's like outlawing art, then putting out a call for artists. Please fix your shit first, governments, you're putting us all at "cyber risk".
I really don't think we need "intelligence" agencies. Our citizens, militaries and police forces are mighty enough to fend off any threat to "national security" without any "intelligence" info whatsoever. The personal privacy rent is too damn high!
There already is a UK Cyber Army. We just don't work for the government. We work for freedom.
Is this only for Britons or can anyone apply?
I am Bennett Haselton! I am Bennett Haselton!
While having the required skills myself to conduct large scale targeted hacking operations, data ex filtration campaigns, encrypted shit MITM just like the NSA does - the thing is i wouldn't ever want to be part or provide help to spying related organizations. I'm even less willing to when it comes to common wealth's AIDS ridden countries.
Sorry guys, if my skills are a weapon then said weapon is pointed right at your skull.
UK is much worse than the US lately in the cyber domain. We don't want to help you censor everything.
Blacklist the agency, and anyone assoiciated with it.
Name names, publish, leak, blow whistles.
Why don't they just arrest the people they want, charge them with 50 gazillion stupid "crimes" and then offer the "applicant" a plea deal in return for their cooperation? Just like we do here in the States.
"The ferrets, they're every where I tell you!"
Russia has already planned for "cyber army" of its own. Except, the only task for poor dumb 18-year olds is astoturfing. You know, making posts about glorious Putin and throwing shit at his numerous enemies (practically anyone, who is not a brain-dead redneck or a criminal) at forums, blogs and news sites. It all started in China, and now more and more political "elites" try to enlist their propaganda soldiers in order to save and prolong their wealth, power and heritage.
So, it's UK time now.
If the research results in something tangible, i think it would be used.
http://soylentnews.org/~tibman
A habit of wearing a fur coat while skateboarding in the data center is considered an advantage.
Help defend a country run by a government of crooks and fascists! ...No thanks.
captcha: unmoved (sounds about right)