Klingon Beer
An anonymous reader writes: "We may not have Saurian Brandy or Romulan Ale, but we'll soon have Klingon Beer. Tin Man Brewing Company in Evansville, Indiana has gotten the OK from CBS to create 'Klingon Warnog,' a Dunkelweizen with 'a modern aroma [of] predominantly mild banana and clove.' It will have an ABV of 5.5%. The Klingon beer will apparently join Vulcan Ale in the Federation of Beer. I wonder what their Prime Directive is."
Klingon beer
Gutteral suds
Your blade will steer
Past Romulan duds
Burma Shave
Get thee glass eyes, and, like a scurvy politician, seem to see things thou dost not.--King Lear
I expect something more like the taste of smoked roasted wild boar and a fine note of decaying fish (SürstrÃming) for the fine taste!
Seriously, they are calling this a "Klingon" beer and it's only 5.5% ABV. This should be in the 9%-10% range at least! And an aroma of cloves and banana!?! Give me a break! It should have a bitter hoppy flavor, maybe with a bit of metallic taste to be reminiscent of freshly spilled blood!
Five point five percent?
This not Klingon beer, humans.
This dilute breast milk.
Surely it should taste of prune's, like a true warrior's drink.
"The space elevator will be built about 50 years after everyone stops laughing." - Arthur C. Clarke ~1980
Please state your country, if it's Netherlands your inner organs will rott of Heiniken, if your from Denmark you will transcend into the taste of bad water (Tuborg).
If you are from Belgium, you should choke on Juliper(*) and get a headache from the heavy drop of Duvel.
If you are from Germany your face should implode by the bitter taste of Bitburger, you will piss KÃlsch like an Ebolanian excremates blood.
And thou shall you drown in the same same piss shit Jever, Bitburger, Astra, Karlsquell, Becks, Heiniken, Tuborg ..
Brewed for the masses out of the designer asses!
Kaplach!
(*) It's also sometimes called "Manekin's Piss"
buy' ngop
Figuratively of course : P
Brought to you by Carl's Junior.
Seriously, "Dunkelweizen" is just plain wrong, no German would call it that horrendous word.
The proper wording is "dunkles Weizen(bier)" == "dark wheat (beer)".
5.5% is not even strong, that's more on the light side; usally this flavour starts at 5.5%, and no beer has below 5.0%.
7% to 7.5% would be a proper alcohol level!
Please get that at least right.
They used to have Romulan Ale and Klingon Blood wine, among other things.
Sad that a Michael Jackson show replaced the Star Trek Experience at the Hilton in Las Vegas. There had been talks of reviving it Downtown, but I guess that never materialized.
Mild banana and clove? If I could edit my last post, I would change from buy' ngop to nuqDaq 'oH puchpa''e'
Brought to you by Carl's Junior.
Dunkelweisen is a beer made with wheat. The reason for the wheat is to make a beer with less of a malty flavor, which means less hops are needed to balance this bland tasteless beer. This is the craft brewers version of light beer. Give me a break.
Methinks GP is possibly a UK real ale drinker. However as this new brew is supposed to be a Dunkelweizen he may be pleasantly surprised. It all depends on how heavy they are with the gruit.
"Wait. Something's happening. It's opening up! My God, it's full of apricots!"
The Alamo Drafthouse was serving Klingon Blood Wine during the premiere of the 2009 Star Trek (also Romulan Ale and Raktajino). I wonder if CBS had to license them.
Fuck this, where's the tranya?
Speaking of which, why aren't they cleaning up the Borg or Klingons? Their ship makes the Enterprise J look like Fred Flintstone's car.
(-1: Post disagrees with my already-settled worldview) is not a valid mod option.
Seriously, cutting back on the hops and using wheat is just plain wrong, no Brit would call lager beer.
Then again a whole generation has had John Smiths Smooth at knockdown prices in university so when they don't know what real beer is. Bloody yuppie kids.
I'm more of a mead guy, myself.
"Wait. Something's happening. It's opening up! My God, it's full of apricots!"
> I wonder what their Prime Directive is.
To get laid.
Fun fact: it won't work.
Dear Slashdot: next time you want to mess with the site, add a rich-text editor for comments.
That's why we drink it here!
Klingon JACKPOT!!
Just add a little carmel coloring and there you have it.
"perfectly drinkable beers unlike the USA that has a choice between Bud light and Coors"
If you aren't familiar with our culture let me enlighten you a little bit:
We do have American brewed beers, but those are just for guests. However, we, probably more than any country, sell all the beer.
We have entire warehouse-sized stores that stock nothing but different varieties of beer. There is probably one in every county. Then we have liquor stores which also (in many places) carry a large variety of beer..3 on every corner.
Going to Europe I was amazed at how good the beer is, but also amazed at just how horrible the selection was in any given country. Europe (anywhere but Germany) talking down to the US about beer is laughable.
Because what true klingon drinks beer anyway?
Proof that you don't Have to be American to know nothing about other countries.
(But it helps.)
No brain, no pain.
Wouldn't the prime directive of a Klingon beer be to not drink it with one's enemies?
Space game using normal deck of cards: http://BattleCards.org
Seriously, a mod down?
Did anyone actually watch Star Trek? Prune juice.... was specifically called a warrior's drink on TNG.
I prefer Patch Adams. Not as good, but it'll put hair on your chest.
Modern copyright is theft of culture from everyone and it retards the progress of the useful arts and sciences.
The past few years have also seen a great increase in microbreweries. Near where I live, there is one that makes some very amazing flavors, and some great full bodied selections. Not everyone in the US drinks Bud Light or Coors.. that stuff you can pour back in the horse!
{} ------ When I think of a good sig, I'll put it here
Weirdest troll post ever.
Let's just call those "edge cases" :)
HIq watlh chut
or maybe
HIq nIt chut
(both can mean law of the pure beer).