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Most People Use Their Phones During Social Events, Despite Thinking It Harms Conversation
Mark Wilson points out that the Pew Research Center has released a new report on mobile etiquette in the age of smartphones. 90% of U.S. adults now have cellphones and carry them around frequently. Pew's survey looked into how this is changing social norms with regard to shifting attention away from physical-world interactions. Most people think it's fine to use a cellphone while walking the streets or waiting in line, but 62% think it's not OK at a restaurant, an 88% disapprove of using one at a family dinner. Disapproval of using a cellphone in a meeting, movie theater, or church is almost universal. 89% of people say they used their cellphone during their most recent social activity, whether it was texting, checking the web, or snapping a picture. Despite this, 82% say cellphone use generally hurts the conversation. 79% of adults say they occasionally encounter loud or annoying cellphone behavior from others in public, and more than half say they often overhear intimate details of other people's lives because of it.
From the people standing in subway doors (do they think we are going to climb out the windows?) to the people talking on the phone, people are rude.
excitingthingstodo.blogspot.com
says captain obvious
But thats because they have so many functions these days
I use my Galaxy Note 3 as a phone less than 1% of the time I am 'using' it
Now that people have become accustomed to having the smartphone handle their news, contact info and communications, they are quite literally incapable of normal conversation without involving the smartphone because it has become a part of their thought processes.
Within 20 years we will probably have contact lenses or even retinal implants that allow us to interact with technology at any time and without anyone noticing. Learning to deal with people looking at their cell phones during conversation is a good way to help transition society to a time when you can't assume 100% of someone's attention just because they are standing next to you.
Now the loud cell phone behavior is just being a jerk though.
-- All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing. -- Edmund Burke
...even when you are busy doing very important stuff with your phone!
Rudeness? Tell me about it!!!!!
When they ignore the jackass on the phone who was there before me and come over to take my order.
I don't believe it, I'm gonna Google it. Hah, George got a parking ticket! Huh? Oh yeah, uh, hold on. There! Oh wait, that's not right. Whaddya think I should I look up to get it? No, how about ... Aww, look at this cute picture!
But but... I need to collect my smurfberries before the timer runs out in 5 minutes!
C'mon! Get your priorities straight!
BRB, I think someone is trying to talk to me.
Posted from my iAntisocial.
Don't waste your vote! Vote for whoever you want, unless you live in a swing state it won't matter anyways
Contrast that with China: My experience is that there it is totally normal in meetings to answer the cellphone when it rings, and if someone is tasked to contact someone else, they think nothing of dialing the other side right away. In the middle of the meeting. To appear eager seems to be more important than focussing on the meeting.
You know it's time for the next revolution when your rulers' names end with roman numerals.
Perhaps the whole Internet Addiction is a real concept after all. I personally know a handful of my friends are trained to check their phones when they hear the "ding" the facebook app makes when you get a notification. Most social applications are designed to be addictive, and given they are custom tailored to the user's data that's not too difficult to code nowadays. Perhaps we should prepare infomercials for public schools and T.V. showing the dangers of not having an attention span (focusing potential) for more than 5 minutes like a squirrel on chocolate coffee due to constant distractions. This is certainly something the parents will have to teach their children, but I suppose that generation doesn't really have families of their own yet, nor do they see anything negative about it. Who needs attention span? *ding* Ohh! My friend posted his lunch on Instagram!
Feel free to stop talking to me.
Years ago I had a manager who could not put down his Blackberry.
He'd call a meeting for us to walk him through some stuff. Every few seconds he looked at his phone. Now and then an email would come in, and he'd be like "what, sorry, I missed that part".
One day I walked out of the room while he was reading his email.
He came running after telling me the meeting wasn't over.
I told him the meeting had never really started, and since it was him who called it for his benefit, he could either put down his phone and listen, or I'd send him an email. But that I wasn't going to sit there repeating myself because he couldn't put his damned phone down.
There is nothing more annoying than some idiot who is in the middle of a social interaction, whips out their phone, loses the plot, and then expects you to give them a recap. Sorry, but I'm standing right here ... I don't give a crap about your electronic device.
If you want to be a selfish bastard, do it on your own time. But don't waste my fucking time because you have the attention span of a child.
That people know it's rude and do it anyway ... that's the part that really annoys the crap out of me. Go away, and I'll send you an email if you prefer. But stop constantly checking the damned thing, because I'm just going to walk away.
Lost at C:>. Found at C.
I'm naturally on the wallflower side of the personality scale, which is not something I especially like about myself.
If I'm bored in a group conversation, and\or no one is engaging me, I'll slip into my phone while the others talk. I'm often not doing much to help the conversation along anyway, and feel embarrassed that I'm not the talkative type that I want to be, which seems to come natural to others. So I may use my phone to save face; it gives myself an excuse for not being in the middle of things, and also simply gives me something to do.
I could probably do a better job inserting myself into the conversation, but social anxiety and self doubt make that difficult. It's not easy to go against your nature, even if you don't like your nature and are trying to get better. My phone escape isn't especially helpful to resolving the problem, but it works for me in the short term.
My problem is, my phone is more interesting than most conversations during social events. I'm socially awkward at best, with esoteric interests. I can only hold a conversation on LeBron or Beyonce for about two minutes before I am bored.
Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
You are stealing souls!
“He’s not deformed, he’s just drunk!”
In the words of Don Martin, One Fine Day At A Taco Hell
"...and I agree, Hillary 2016 baby and...yes, that's a picture of Taylor Swift...what are you doing, what are you...oh gross! Stop fapping!"
(-1: Post disagrees with my already-settled worldview) is not a valid mod option.
At least it would have been if I wasn't playing with my phone during this social event.
Trying to get first post on slashdot counts as a social event, right? Right? RIGHT?!?
That's what most people seem to view the thing as -- which is wrong. It should not be a lifestyle, it is a phone. It should not take the place of actual, in-person, face-to-face social interactions, not any more than so-called 'social media' should. That's the problem: Smartphones, 'social media', the Internet in general, all claim to 'connect people' and 'bring people together', when in fact all they're doing is giving people and excuse to distance themselves from actual social interactions with other human beings. We see the effects of this more and more all the time. Words on a screen can't take the place of live interaction with another human being. We communicate on more levels than just the words we say, and text on a screen is about as sterile as you can get. There is inflection, tone of voice, body language.. you don't get any of this with just text on a screen. What's worse, most people don't even seem to read everything someone writes, so what little true meaning they could get from just text is also lost because of that. Even using your phone as a phone, you're still missing out on layers of non-verbal communication that you'd otherwise be getting the benefit of. This lack of real communication between people is leading to more and more misunderstandings.
Are YOU using the TOOL, or is the TOOL using YOU? Think about it!
I don't give a crap about your electronic device.
If you want to be a selfish bastard, do it on your own time. But don't waste my fucking time because you have the attention span of a child.
Whoa! Your company has Fucking Time? We barely get Coffee Breaks here.
As for your boss's behavior, I put the blame on you. Don't EVER schedule a meeting during Fucking Time! I can't believe someone actually has to tell you this.
talking on the phone disturbs others.
Texting or surfing means you are not really there.
Taking photos means you are at least being involved - especially group selfies.
when someone else does it.
When I do it, it's ok, because I have good reasons and it's really important.
In other news, surveys have uncovered that laws only apply to the other guy.
Welcome to the Panopticon. Used to be a prison, now it's your home.
These situations are not so black and white.
Good - Looking up contentious fact being discussed.
Bad - Shopping online while conversation is going on.
Good - Taking one picture to memorialize a special dinner.
Bad - Taking a picture of every plate of food one eats.
Good - Texting late guest to see where they are?
Bad - Texting someone completely unrelated to the event.
Bad - Talking loudly on one's phone while other people are having a conversation.
The problem is not that the smartphone is being but why the smartphone is being used. If the use contributes to the event I don't see an issue.
It's rude to use your smartphone sometimes, but I only use mine for really good reasons. So everyone except for me is rude.
My friends/family on their phones is something I can speak up about so that can be annoying but manageable. What really irritates me are all of the zombies walking around while they are looking at their phone. They are oblivious to everything around them and they get in my way. Sometimes I just want to slap the phone out of their hands.
I do, however, go out with my GF, and when I do, the phone is in my pocket. I might check my email when she's getting 2nds at the buffet, and she checks hers while I'm taking a leak, but when we're eating or watching a crappy movie, we don't use our phones.
Slow down, cowboy! It has been 4 hours since you last posted. You must wait another few hours.
https://www.youtube.com/embed/...
#o#
O Moo.
I was standing in a long line, and watched two people at the counter trying to simultaneously mail parcels and talk on their phone. In both cases the postal worker had to explain things multiple times, and wait for them to finish chatting for a second before paying. One even turned to the postal worker and said, "Excuse me, can you hold on a second?". People suck.
I had a college professor answer his phone and talk for a few minutes during a lecture he was giving. I found this to be rude enough that I left.
If your in a cinema then no your coughs wont disguise your ringtone.
Couple of years ago we had 'invited' guests over when an easter occurred. a girl spent most of her time with her friends who might have been with us physically the phone had the attention. Not my problem...
My belief is that it's not that you are using your cell phone, but how. I'm OK with people using it during whatever social event as long as it is in a constructive manner. Say, to pull up movie times while discussing after dinner plans, coordinating with other people to meet up, settle an argument with some facts, etc.
The phone makes it easier for someone to be non-social if they want to be, but it doesn't automatically turn social people non-social.
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I have pretty strict rules for myself on pulling out my phone. If I am in a conversation I will not check it, period. If I am expecting a message that is urgent (how often does that happen though), I will excuse myself and step away. But if someone is in a group and there is a break in the interactivity and they check infrequently in a very low key way then that's cool by me.
Nothing worse than socializing with someone or a group of people, over a beer or whatever, and a good flow of conversation and laughs and then they just suddenly zone out for 3 minutes on their phone(s). That's a buzz kill man, and I am more than likely going to wrap it up and find something else to do.
Also, watched a fireworks show in Ottawa in August and the three teens sitting in front of us pretty much watched the whole thing through their phones recording it. How asinine is that?
I think its fine by your self doing stuff on your phone. I even think its Ok to check messages briefly on occasion with other people. But I don't think your attention should be more focused on whatever is on your phone then actual people. I was at a college speaking event and it amazed me how many educated people did not have the manors to simply mute their phones. I kept hearing text tones throughout the event. Its no different then talking, a baby crying, or just plain noisy. People do not seem to have developed manors about respecting others. Its disrespectful and just because its a smartphone, does not mean you are smart and know how to use one.
They just found a new way to offend those around them.
I'm sure people are just looking up relevant scripture during the engaging sermon.
I immediately stop talking and if the person notices, they will usually apologize. If they don't notice after a few seconds then i turn and walk away.
Call me crazy but I don't have a cel phone. At home I have a computer and and work I have a computer so I don't really need one in between, or when I am out and about enjoying myself. I guess I am an extreme minority now, but I will never be one of these zombies you see everywhere. I like to be aware of what is going on around me. I believe that not connected time, simply staring at the scenery on the train for instance, helps one to think and process things. No one thinks anymore, they just look down at their phones and distract themselves.
I can appreciate that cel phones are a useful tool, but the way people treat them is so bad I can't stomach the thought of owning one.
Not to mention all the persistent tracking and other horrible privacy concerns. Not to mention the upfront multi hundred dollar cost and the $50+ monthly cost... I guarantee that the only phones I ever own and use will be feature phones that make and receive calls only. I don't need a little TV turning my mind to mush and tracking me all the while.
As a potential lottery winner, I totally support tax cuts for the wealthy
In other words: Use the device as the tool that it is...
No. Using a hammer as a hammer in a china shop would be inappropriate and unwelcome. Using a phone as a phone in a movie theater is explicitly forbidden.
people say they used their cellphone during their most recent social activity, whether it was texting, checking the web, or snapping a picture
One of these things is not like the others. Snapping a picture is part of the in-person interaction. Snapping a picture of the people you're with is quite different from sending a text to a person who's not there.
There is a new meme going around. At the beginning of the dinner everyone puts their phone face down in the middle of the table. The first person to pick up their phone without the consent of everyone else before the end of the meal pays for everyone. This leave the option open to do things constructive to the conversation, like checking on a late party member, while still not paying.
Those are my clue words.
When I hear them, I know the speaker, although physically part of a conversation, had changed their focus to their device and is attempting to re-engage.
Their attempt to re-engage is usually precisely timed to match a) when they think the conversation has returned to being about them or b) when they want to interrupt the conversation to say something that they think is important but was JUST SAID WHILE THEY WERE NOT PAYING ATTENTION.
So frustrating.
Wait, what?
remove nospam. to email!
As a pedestrian, I've almost been run over by a bike and ran into on foot in about the last 2 weeks by people too buried in their phones to look in front of them. Which in my book is f'ing stupid. Both times I yelled at them right before they ran into me.... so they wouldn't run into me. Oh, and I watched someone run a red light while looking down at their phone. F'ing stupid.
Break the figures down by RACE, and I bet you'll see that the wonderful, 'Just the same as us' BLACKS use their phones more than whites do, in situations which many would consider it rude to do so. You don't say...
I'm the only one in the universe that counts.
When I got into computers in the 1980s, the lucky few of us had dedicated computer desks in some remote corner. I guess my parents wanted it to be in some common area instead of my own room so they could see what I'm doing. Also, grownups with computers used it either for work or "work", but in a separate location likewise.
These were interesting times because cell phones had a somewhat similar life cycle. In the past, you'd call a place, but with the cell phones in the mid-90s, you could actually call a person instead, and that made so much more sense. In the mid/late 90s I was studying away from home, and I felt similarly about laptops, as they were not tied to a specific location. They were the real personal computers.
The social impact of laptops was that you could take it to a common table, instead of geeking out in a separate corner. While it obviously takes your attention, it won't block the eye contact with others in the same way desktops would. Tablets and phones are just a natural continuation of this. IMHO, this is how computers got mainstream, not so much due to computing power or networking, but by not getting in the way.
Unfortunately, the idea of going away to do some computing still makes sense. Or maybe it's just me, I want to focus on one thing at a time and do it well, be it computers or people. It's sad seeing all these young people with their phones like they're on crack.
Escher was the first MC and Giger invented the HR department.
I am amazed at how many people walk around head down and texting without a clue of their surroundings.
1. Girl standing on a busy downtown street corner, looking down at her phone, completely oblivious. A huge flat bed truck hauling an excavator is creeping around the apex of the corner and the side of the truck frame is getting closer and closer to her as the truck cuts off the corner. I finally realize she doesn't see the truck, now only inches away and grab her shoulder and pull her back a step. She is about to yell at me when she sees the truck, the back wheels of which are now rolling over the curb where her feet were 3 seconds earlier, and realizes how narrowly she just escaped.
2. Standing waiting for a light, a different girl, head down, texting, walks into me from behind. The top of her head actually hits me in the small of my back. I turn around and she looks up, looks up some more (I'm about 6'3", she's a tiny asian girl maybe 5'4" tops), finally says "You should watch where your'e going" WTF?
None of them can see the clouds; The polished wings don't care.
99.9% of the discussions in a social environment are NOT about the facts.
Sorry but your friends are no like mine. Mine like to talk about facts and opinions of those facts. With mine I would say the ratio is closer to 80%.
Look it up and you find the truth. The discussion can move on.
Other outcomes are as follows;
You waste time supporting your conflicting opinions and the discussion gets hijacked over who is correct.
You accept the wrong fact and the discussion becomes invalid because it is based on a false premise.
Talking to others is what was important.
I like to learn things along with talking.
I always prefer to verify a fact when I can rather than assume what someones says is true. One person looking up a fact for 30 seconds does not end discussion it just moves it along. For example, last weekend I was playing board games at a pub. We wanted to play Settlers of Catan. We normally have four players and the standard rules are set up for that. Tonight we had five players. We used our smartphones to find the 5/6 players setup for Settlers. Without the smartphone we would all have been disappointing.
BTW, I have a form of autism that causes me to have a need to verify facts. If there is a controversy my mind fixates on it and it takes me out of the discussion. Verifying facts actually allows me to stay in the conversation.