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Ask Slashdot: What Would You Do If You Were Suddenly Wealthy?
An anonymous reader writes: There are a few articles floating around today about comments from Markus Persson, aka "Notch," the creator of Minecraft. He sold his game studio to Microsoft last year for $2.5 billion, but he seems to be having a hard time adjusting to his newfound fame and wealth. He wrote, "The problem with getting everything is you run out of reasons to keep trying, and human interaction becomes impossible due to imbalance. ... Found a great girl, but she's afraid of me and my life style and went with a normal person instead. I would Musk and try to save the world, but that just exposes me to the same type of a$#@%&*s that made me sell minecraft again." While he later suggests he was just having a bad day, he does seem to be dealing with some isolation issues. Granted, it can be hard to feel sorry for a billionaire, but I've wondered at times how I'd handle sudden wealth like that, and I long ago decided it would make the human relationships I'm accustomed to rather difficult. So, how would you deal with Notch's problem? It seems like one the tech industry should at least be aware of, given the focus on startup culture.
How about volunteering time and money and spend some time helping people in need instead of whining, blaming, and name calling?
Step 1: Stop reading Slashdot
The world is made by those who show up for the job.
I'd buy an island and make a nation out of it. I would live there with the family and my army of 1000 topless female slave-warriors. The island would have a private airstrip and a private jet, piloted by a topless female slave-warrior, that would whisk us around the globe. People would become jealous of my topless female slave-warriors because Grub Island would be the only place on the planet with them.
I would have a lottery with $1,000,000 ticket prices. The prize would be one week on my island with 10 topless female slave-warriors to be at the winner's beck and call. After the winner departed Grub Island, the other topless female slave-warriors would destroy the lottery winner's 10 because they would then be soiled and not worthy of me.
Trolling is a art,
Becoming wealthy (whatever "wealthy" is considered these days) comes with its own challenges.
People with no money have very specific challenges: find food and water and shelter for your family. Everything else is secondary.
People that have a job and shelter but not enough money have different challenges: Buying a car, paying for school, You have enough for basic necessities but not enough for aspiration items.
People with lots of money have unique challenges: Who do you trust? Taxes become problematic. Gold diggers. How do you raise kids without spoiling them?
It seems to me that the sweet spot is around 100K per year. You're not rich but you have enough. In many cities that is enough to buy a nice home and a new car every 4-5 years. It's a nice place to be.
Buy land and start a small hobby farm (very small). Animals and crops require constant attention, you can't ignore them for even a day. Keeps you busy, keeps you grounded, even if you do still get most of your food from a grocery store. He's got enough to bring internet access out from nearby town or city, so he can stay up to date and work for fun instead of a living, until he figures out what he'd rather do instead.
Stop "solving" all your problems with money and pick up a few that require attention and care instead of cash. You can buy the animals, buildings, and tools, but YOU still have to use them or you fail and things die.
The first thing I need to do is hire an accountant so I know how much I actually have. If I do anything else first, I have a feeling a significant portion of the fortune would be gone before I have any kind of understanding of what my tax burden is, and I'd fuck myself right back to poverty.
Next thing I do (after buying a house, of course) is start studying accountancy, because if I've learned anything from reading the news the past several years, it's that NOBODY can be trusted with that many zeroes.
After that, I've got friends who need help, and who deserve it much more than I do. I want to see them happy. Then I can start worrying about businesses and philanthropy and shit like that.
I would be Batman.
then we could all still hang on roughly equal levels.
i'd ONLY have $1.5 billion left to myself, oh noes :-(
This is the best answer right here, and it would cure his loneliness, too. Not only do the people who have stuck by you during the hard times deserve the reward, but they're the ones who have proven who you can trust.
I'd have to go Musk and start building my Bond villain infrastructure.
Fleet of cars who's 'owners' don't know are autonomous-check.
Fleet of rocket ships-check.
Doomsday device-check
The question is: Where is Musk's secret lair?
John McAfee 'It was like that time I hired that Bangkok prostitute; to do my taxes, while I fucked my accountant'
Money is money. It can't treat a person well and it can't treat a person poorly. People on the other hand is another issue, especially people who you don't know yet who know you (or think they know you).
Money can be buried in investments, or dispersed if you want to go to the trouble too. Bury a person though, that will get you in trouble with the law. Disperse people, and they will think you're antisocial.
I can't honestly say what I would do if I had that much money. I would like to think that I'd bury it in investments, skimming just enough off the top to behave like a typical person. Yet I would do my best to avoid the fame bit. Relationships are awkward enough when you know them and they know you. Having the imbalance where people know you, but not the other way around, is something to be avoided.
Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man: two chicks at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I were a millionaire I could hook that up, too; 'cause chicks dig dudes with money.
Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.
Lawrence: Well, the type of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.
Peter Gibbons: Good point.
Lawrence: Well, what about you now? What would you do?
Peter Gibbons: Besides two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Well, yeah.
Peter Gibbons: Nothing.
Lawrence: Nothing, huh?
Peter Gibbons: I would relax... I would sit on my ass all day... I would do nothing.
Lawrence: Well, you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin: he's broke, don't do shit.
It really is difficult to feel for Notch when, by his own admission in that series of tweets, he shows that having the material possessions and lavish experiences that is typical of filthy rich people has been his primary focus. It's myopic, depressing to the point of repulsion, and all-too-typical of the rich.
As for the human interaction element, that's of his own doing and merely an extension of the HAVING ALL THE RICH DUDE THINGS mentality. I wouldn't really care to hang around someone regularly who has some obnoxious, resource-guzzling mansion, replete with luxuries that, frankly, no person really needs. It all feeds into a mental sickness, and the only way he can snap out of it is by his own sheer will--to question himself and why he feels so empty. The answers, while not that difficult, tend to elude those who have relinquished critical thinking regarding their own lifestyle in favor of, "Well, I sure am having a shitty week... time for a weekend bender in Ibiza!"
I hope he's able to successfully reflect on his current life situation and realize that to have "normal" human interaction, you can't flaunt wealth and economically divide yourself from your peers in the numerous ways the rich tend to.
#1 setup an annuity for FSF
#2 look for software projects begging for $ to get going.
#3 look on Kickstarter for projects begging for $ to get going.
#4 become a prophet!
Obama's legacy: (N)othing (S)ecure (A)nywhere and (T)error (S)imulation (A)dministration
When I was in college, there was a guy who was really wealthy (no idea how much, not billions, but millions I'm sure) --- his parents died young, I think it was an accident of sorts, and he inherited a fortune, or got a settlement.
Anyway... people used him for free beer, parties, food, anything they could get from him. I knew him tangentially because he was a pen and paper gamer, and ran some D&D sessions so we had some common friends.
The poor guy seemed miserable, knowing most people were only hanging out with him for his money, etc. Seriously, he was just a sad sack, seemed depressed and lonely in that existential kind of way. I know people say 'aw.... poor little rich boy', but I really felt bad for the guy. He seemed like a decent enough person, but the money didn't seem to make his life really that much better. Sure he didn't have student loans like I did, didn't have to work like I did -- but I had some good friends, who certainly didn't hang out with me for money (or lack thereof)
'The unexamined life is not worth living' - Socrates
Right now every US presidential candidate needs a billionaire backer to run. That usually means bad things. Maybe Notch and his $$ can balance the scales a bit and back Bernie Sanders or Elizabeth Warren? But then again, I don't know his politics and perhaps this is a terrible suggestion.
"Those that start by burning books, will end by burning men."
Buy every industry in said town. Give loans to desperate people that you know they can't pay back. Buy up all the politicians and the realestate. Become sheriff because that is where the real local power is. Make subtle changes to the town and architecture giving everything a creepy southern gothic kind of feel. Slowly tighten your grip year after year. Ah, it would be heaven.
- Buy Slashdot: so that they don't need the extra money that have them publish ad-oriented stories, sometimes
- Pay competent consultants and developers to "help" Gnome, xOffice, and a mega bunch of other OSS projects to get managed efficiently/properly
- run for president, as a lot of wealthy people do, I guess
Slashdot, fix the reply notifications... You won't get away with it...
Suddenly everybody wants a piece of you and you have to distrust their motivations. Because the amount of people looking to sink in their teeth isn't going to be small.
Conversely, how do you expect to have a normal relationship with a non-wealthy person? Suddenly they're trying to keep up with a zillionaire and haven't got the means ... which means they're living on the charity of rich people and whatever their mood does. That tends to be present no matter how much you want it to not be. Get into a fight in some faraway location you can't afford to be in on your own, and you're a nobody.
Get rich over time, and you can build up some friends in the same situation. Get rick quickly and you can't. In which case you better hope your family and your existing friends can cope with it.
I've seen TV shows with some lottery winners ... and they constantly get letters from random people looking to get handouts, or people trying to scam them. Because people are greedy bastards. Oh, and the other rich people want nothing to do with you because you're new money.
I've always said I have no interest in being rich and famous ... I want to be rich and anonymous, precisely because I don't want to deal with this bullshit.
The real question is ... as tragic as this is, how much sympathy do recent billionaires expect from the rest of us? The whole "I'm a billionaire, now what?" is one of those questions which you can't expect a serious or helpful answer from anybody who hasn't done it.
Lost at C:>. Found at C.
Realize that your life is yours to live. You choose your lifestyle, not the other way around.
I've been my own boss for a while and I've grown a successful company. I'm a millionaire many dozens of times over. I drive an old Volvo wagon I bought used for $2500. I live in a 1500 square foot house. I buy clothes at Kohls. Only a very small handful of people know what I'm worth, and they are sworn to secrecy.
I chose to life the lifestyle of a regular Joe. Here's a step-by-step guide to coming into a lot of money quickly:
1) SHUT THE FUCK UP. Keep it secret to the best of your ability. If you can't, come up with a plan for that. But, do the best you can.
2) Decide NOW what kind of lifestyle you want to live. Think 5 years down the road about the company you will want to keep. Birds of a feather flock together. White people hang out with white people. Rich people hang out with rich people. It sucks, but you have to decide now.
3) Put the principal away, and pay yourself what it takes to live the lifestyle you decided to live in Step 2.
4) Finally, and most important, change NOTHING right away (except, paying off debt is perfectly okay). Stay at your job. Don't run away. Don't take a vacation. Don't throw a party for all of your close friends unless you want to find out how many of them actually aren't your close friends. Just maintain the status quo and make decisions SLOWLY.
That is the best advice I can give, from one rich guy to another.
A successful celebrity was once asked if money buys happiness.
Her reply was, "I'd rather be rich and miserable than poor and miserable."
Table-ized A.I.
You'd lose it all paying bribes before you managed to build your first factory. Every local official wants whatever they can bleed out of you. The third-world is littered with half-finished hotels and other abandoned construction projects.
Required reading for internet skeptics
I would buy /. and make sure questions like these would be relegated to reddit & digg.
Knowledge = Power
P= W/t
t=Money
Money = Work/Knowledge so the less you know the more you make
Until one dies of an overdose, one disappears into some kind of cult, half of the rest spend it all and blame you when you won't give them more because now they're entitled. It sounds like a good plan, but it can go bad pretty easily, too.
The Quirkz Handbook of Self-Improvement for People Who Are Already Pretty Okay
Go completely dark.
Hire attorneys to handle ALL your affairs. Carry only credit cards. Stay out of the news.
But you can also have fun anonymously...
Make an arrangements with a car deal to give away cars to people you think deserve it as you encounter them.
Pay the check for an entire restaurant full of people when you leave.
Watch for local foreclosures and intercede on the behalf of those you think are getting a raw deal.
Fund a promising local business for two years.
Of course it goes without saying that you pay off the mortgages of all your relatives and set up college savings accounts for all of your children, nieces, nephews and cousins.
When Fascism comes to America, it will call itself Anti-Fascism, and tell you to give up your guns.
I would have a broadband connection installed at home.
Minimum threshold fixed. Thanks!
Hindsight is 20/20, but I've always thought that were I to come upon a windfall of some large(ish) caliber, I'd likely not tell a soul, and not change my lifestyle significantly and suddenly. Sure it's tempting to run out and buy a Ferrari, but if one thinks about it, those are childish wishes and whims - a lack of self-control, if you will. The first things I'd do is settle all my debts (house, car, etc.), which aren't as visible to others. I'd also start winding down my employment (i.e. 1-month or even 2-month notice).
By simply slowing the transition down significantly, perhaps even "embellishing" the nature of the windfall (i.e. "I just closed a deal that's going to do very well for me over the next 2 years") such that the changes are logical and incremental vs. sudden and drastic, one can avoid such "acclimation pains" in one's social circle.
In the end, if you change your life drastically there's a very good chance you'll run into the same isolation issues - windfall or no. So it's about the (perceived) speed of the climb, not the steepness.
Besides, if you make the change slow it's easier for people to see that you're not changing - just your lifestyle and economic conditions. Less scary that way I think.
PS/ what's he bitching and whining about women for? he can afford any (set of) pornstar(s) he wants now!! :D
First I would keep my pie hole shut about coming into a massive pile of money. Then since I wouldn't have to worry about where my next meal is coming from I would start running my mouth at work and let people know what I really thing of some of their ideas. There are a couple of people who I think just like to hear their own voice and when you are in a meeting with them they give the impression that you are there to bask in their glory and genius even if they say some of the stupidest shit ever to be utter.
Apart from that get a new car (I'm thinking an M4), get a new truck like vehicle (can't take an M4 out hunting in remote areas), put up a cabin on my recreational property. Although I would like a nice custom made leather trench coat made from that nice thick cow hide that they make motorcycle safety jackets out of. Apart from that I would probably quietly give to various charities, ensure that my children will be well off, and that any of my relatives won't have to worry about school if they apply themselves.
Time to offend someone
I find you ideas fascinating, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter....
HA! I just wasted some of your bandwidth with a frivolous sig!
Interestingly, it seems he's already tried what I probably would have gone for at his age: Buying a ginormous house and trying to act like a hedonistic big shot.
As a ... more experienced person nearing 50, I think my priorities would be different. Big houses suck. They require continual maintenance, and who's going to be wasting their time shepherding all that? Having to deal with stupid BS little issues all day is precisely what he sold to MS to avoid. The more big expensive crap you acquire, the more effort has to be expended to maintain it all. No wonder he's made himself miserable. I can always trade time for money, and that certainly goes moreso for someone with his new financial resources. Its TIME that is precious.
Today, I'd find a fun interesting place to live, and *rent* myself a place there. Preferably somewhere walkable, so I wouldn't have to maintain a car (gawd, what a time and money sink those things are). I'd probably approach a local charity (like the food bank) and offer to do some free computer work for them. Knowing myself (and as a developer he's probably similar), it wouldn't take long to find some really interesting problem in there that could have wide application.
As for meeting people, how is he going to meet cool new people while locked behind gates in that mansion? Blah.
You are correct that a million will net about $60k. That's in a diversified portfolio of long-term investments, a fairly reliable income. Actually $600K per ten years is reliable - year to years gains will fluctuate and that's okay - your spending doesn't have to fluctuate to match each year.
What will ALSO net $60K spending money is earning 100K, saving 12% for retirement, spending 15% on your mortgage, etc. Once you retire, you're no longer saving up for retirement. If you pay off your house before you retire, you're no longer paying mortgage. You're probably not saving for your kids' college anymore. Therefore a $1 million retirement fund will provide approximately the same lifestyle as a $100K / year job.
This assumes you're under 55 currently, so you don't count on any social security at all. *
* You know based on how people are 55 today that 20 years there will be more 75 year-olds than there is money to pay benefits.
Studies have shown that most people would be very happy if their income doubled. But then they get used to the new level and need another double fix. There is never enough money.
I think that the sweet spot is $500k, especially in an urban area. I would never pay a million dollars for my house, but that is what it will sell for.
A large increase in money means moving to a new house in a new social strata. If you are 1000 times richer than your neighbors and friends, life is impossible.
Reading everything is helpful. You learn from Jane Austin that ones "wealth" was not how much money was in the bank, but how much one could spend in a year.
"Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping."
-- Bo Derek
Shutting down free speech with violence isn't fighting fascism. It IS fascism!
You think way too small. You can buy decommissioned aircraft carriers for cheap.
Time to go all snowcrash and build a floating nation.
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
"I would Musk and try to save the world, but that just exposes me to the same type of a$#@%&*s that made me sell minecraft again."
You don't have to try to be Musk. If you don't feel the need to get into that or be that sort of creative, at least you can recognize the people who do/are. Call him. You don't need to buy public shares when you have that kind of money. You invest in other people who are trying to change the world.
Keep some for yourself and enjoy your life while knowing that your money is helping to change the world. Don't like what Musk is doing? He's just an example. Fine something you believe in and invest.
I would blow it on something I found ridiculously cool. Like hardened, high-speed em-drive interstellar probes or something. But to each his own.
I am not interested in articles about life extension advancements.
Wait...what was the question again?
Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
'Notch' is an exceedingly average-looking person, not a celebrity, and isn't even popularly known by his real name. If he dropped a few pounds (and he could stand to) and shaved his beard he'd be near-unrecognizable. Hair plugs wouldn't be out of order either. His own mother wouldn't recognize him, much less the average person on the street.
And, it's not required that you state your real name and wealth status to everyone you meet.
All that is required is that he remain low-key and doesn't flaunt his wealth and identity. If he walked into a restaurant in Grenoble I guarantee you nobody would even blink.
Anyone who thinks money can't buy happiness has never bought a week's groceries for a poor person.
My blog: http://www.seebs.net/log/ --- My iPhone/iPad app: http://www.seebs.net/seebsfrac/
Depends on the animals. Cats are extremely low-maintenance. You could leave them alone for a week with an automatic litterbox and food dispenser. Or hire someone from Craigslist to check on them every few days. Some of them actually travel really well too, so you could always bring them with you. The main problem is finding hotels that'll take them, but you can always just sneak them in if they're not very vocal.
What I really don't understand is why so many people have dogs, and not just any dogs, but big dogs. There's no way you can get away when you have one of those things. They have to be walked at least once a day, they have to be let outside several times a day to relieve themselves (since they can't use litterboxes), if you live in a subdivision that means you need to accompany them outside so you can pick up the poo or else get fined (or you let them into your back yard and pretty soon the place looks like a Mad Max scene but with piles of dog poo all over), you can't easily take them on a plane (cats go in carriers under the seat), when you do take them they need a giant cage, and then frequently the pilot forgets to turn on the cargo bay heat so the dog freezes to death during the flight. The food cost is huge because they eat so much of it, so count on $50-100/month just for that, and on top of that now your house stinks and is filthy unless you invest a ton of time into constantly cleaning both the dog and the house (since they apparently can't keep themselves clean). You can board your dog when you travel, but that costs $30-50 per day, which adds up fast. Hiring a pet sitter from Craigslist is also doable, but most likely isn't going to work well because they can't visit often enough to let the dog out before it shits on the carpet or in his cage. You can't even spend an unplanned night at someone's house with a dog, because there's no way to arrange a pet-sitter that fast unless you have some very accommodating neighbors (and it's not good to assume they'll be around to take care of your dog at such short notice).
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Persson also began hosting wild parties where guests like Skrillex, Selena Gomez, and Tony Hawk would sometimes make appearances.
I'd hire a ninja keep those people out.
And another ninja to beat my ass if I had actually invited them.
Nope, and I like it that way.
Slashdot is forum of the ancient internet and is modelled after usenet. Comments have subjects, just like a usenet thread. And once you post something, it's out there, just like usenet. Sure they could let you edit the post, but then you could make the replies seem stupidid or nonsensical.
I like it like this.
SJW n. One who posts facts.
I offer to solve all of Mr Persson's problems caused by excessive money. I can solve them all by tomorrow, for the low low price of 2.5 billion dollars.
Don't waste your vote! Vote for whoever you want, unless you live in a swing state it won't matter anyways
With 2.5 Billion Dollars? I'm too lazy to do the real math, but im guessing you could pick one random person and give them $100,000 every day for the rest of your life and still have enough money to live comfortably.
OR you could hire enough people to completely buy out the next iDevice release on opening day, and light the whole batch on fire, just to watch the hipsters cry about it. 453 retail Apple stores, 100 people per store, 20 devices per person, $700 average retail would cost you just over $634M. You wouldn't completely buy them out, but it'd be enough to make a pretty little dent. (This seems to be an XKCD "What if" submission waiting to happen... "What would it take to buy every iPhone available on release day? And what could I do with them once I bought them")
As a person with (some) big dogs, I feel I have it easier than people with children...
Log in or piss off.