Windows 10's Next Update Will Be Called 'Spring Creators Update' (theverge.com)
The Verge reports: Microsoft is planning to reuse its "Creators Update" naming for a third Windows 10 update. The software giant has strangely not yet officially named its next Windows 10 update, due next month, but it has been testing a future update that appears to reveal the spring update name. "Windows 10 Spring Creators Update" has been spotted in the latest test builds of the Redstone 5 update expected to be released later this fall. Microsoft first launched Windows 10 Creators Update last spring, followed by the Windows 10 Fall Creators Update in the fall. The new Windows 10 Spring Creators Update naming was originally spotted in Microsoft blog posts last year, but this is the first time it has appeared in the operating system itself.
And, living in the southern hemisphere, it is hardly spring. I guess this update is not for me.
I'm a consumer. I also work on a desktop. I'm not a creator. Is there an update for me? Because I'm starting to think Microsoft isn't serious about capturing non creator market share.
Does this update feature the ability to wake a laptop from sleep?
Is this because Microsoft created Windows, and this is the update they released?
Because the name is redundant.
I'm kind of getting sick of this bullshit name "Creator's Update" that doesn't even provide any information on what they'll actually be putting in the update
The interesting thing about Windows is that they used to have to convince people to buy the new versions every few years. Now that it's a "service" that you just buy once with a computer (Home and Pro) or pay monthly for the rest of your life (Enterprise/Education), there's less marketing magic around new releases. No more people lining up at computer stores at midnight, flashy launch parties, etc.
In an environment like that, there's no reason to promote a new version, so why spend money on a marketing campaign? Just reuse the one from last year. It would be great if they plowed the money they saved by firing the marketing team into product engineering, but that just doesn't happen anywhere.
Unless this update brings along the ability to disable all spyware, disable all advertising and control updates manually, I still won't give a shit about Windows 10.
... I am more concerned whether or not it will work? Howls of pain from Win10 1607 and 1703 users who were forced to upgrade to Windows 10 Fall Creators Update today.. Microsoft has to stop using residential customers as their alpha-testers.
I'm a creator.
I depend on my machines to make money every single day. If they don't work, I can't put food on my table. It really is that simple.
Your fall creators update effectively destroyed my W10 installation and cost me 3 days of productivity to get it back online. You later forced a driver update on the machine that took out my graphics tablet. And then less than a month later, I left the keyboard for two hours and you decided to not only reboot my machine (which would have lost my state had I not saved it before I left), but install several updates that broke two of my primary 3D packages.
I got so sick and tired of your fucking bullshit, I built myself a machine out of last generation parts (which weren't even any slower than what I had), and threw Windows 7 on it instead. Why? Because it fucking works, that's why. The updates don't overhaul my entire OS. It doesn't force driver updates on me. I don't have to worry about it committing suicide when I walk away to grab a sandwich, because I can outright disable WU and it respects my decision.
So fuck you Microsoft. Your "creators" bullshit is just that, bullshit. You don't give a shit about reliability or stability so long as your telemetry is flowing. Fuck your company, and your OS. When I can no longer run Windows 7 on the bare metal, I'll run it in a VM under Linux and run whatever else I can natively instead.
Yours truly,
A pissed off "creator" who couldn't even use W10 to reliably create things.
Which won’t run Steam or Chrome, which means a Netscape style killing of their market share. Join the resistance and “F” “S”.
Windows 10's Next Update Will Be Called 'F U Little People'
Spring creators around the world say "it's about fucking time somebody did something for us". Now they can make springs large and small with the ease of technology, and step out of the stone age.
"Everybody's naked underneath" -- The Doctor
How fucking festive is that?
"Eve of Destruction", it's not just for old hippies anymore...
... Because why have something unique enough that people can refer to it easily as a unique item. That only causes problems for Microsoft. Nobody is going to say, "Hey, that Spring Creator's Update was sure wunnerful, wuddunit?" They don't want people thinking about updates, and for those of us whose job it is to relate to that level.... well, we don't count.
Either that, or they just didn't think about it. Which means we don't count. Their progression along the Apple path continues.
Remember how we all go excited when Microsoft said 10 would be an OS that got updates forever? Well, each of these "Creators Updates" are actually like full version of the OS than an "update". Basically, Microsoft is using almost the same process as when they made a major release (like moving from Windows 7 to 8 to 10). Just ask any Sys Admin.
Aren't they more akin to a service pack than a whole new OS install
Or at least that is the impression I have.
The millennial that doesn't like most of the stuff designed for millennials.
So the ultimate outcome will be exceptionally high quality Cat Videos
When Fascism comes to America, it will call itself Anti-Fascism, and tell you to give up your guns.
I have an idea...
Instead of all this idiotic updates, how about returning to the original release cycle?
It's bad enough that Microsoft foists updates on us uncategorically, but then they also use these updates as a way of moving the support goalposts, so a computer that worked fine before is suddenly "no longer supported".
Windows 10 may be technologically great, but Microsoft gross mismanagement of it has turned it into the single worst version of Windows in Microsoft history, easily trumping even Windows ME.
It should be called Spring Forward. The next one can be Fall Back.
If you want a choice about whether to upgrade, the easiest fix it to open up your registry editor and set all of your network connections (including wired connection) as metered connections.
For a few months now, Windows 10 has been popping up its message asking me if it can please download a 5GB update, pleeeease, but letting me know that internet usage fees may apply. It's still sitting nicely at 0% downloaded.
Is it going to uninstall half my programs (sorry, "Apps") like the Fall Creators' Update did?
That even got my (legitimate) Office 2010 install.
Captcha: Unworthy
Use words borrowed from edible things...y'a know, like Turkey, Lemon...
.. for the update that gives me a normal start menu without a defunct 3rd party add on.
Oh yah! thats all well and good for the spring creators, But what are the gear creators and screw creators supposed to do ?
Spying Creators Update
No. Every major update does three things:
1: Installs as if you're doing a dirty reinstallation of the OS, leaving you a "Windows.old" directory to revert to (if you're lucky it'll actually work).
2: Completely changes a bunch of Group Policy settings and Registry keys for things system admins need to control, like the various spying "features", the ads in the start menu and notification pane, the automatically deployed applications from the Store, etc.
3: Fucks your drivers, because fuck you.
In terms of actual features for users? Nothing anyone cares about. The "big thing" now is the SUPER ULTRA ULTIMATE PERFORMANCE mode. Which just means it disables relevant power plan shit so your CPU never clocks down because of Windows. (The hardware itself will still be able to control its own clocks, of course.) I have no idea why anyone would want this. It would be a placebo. The CPU ramps up when under load faster than anyone would ever notice.
Remember, when a few years ago, we were all "information workers". We were either creating, modifying, or consuming information. Now, we are all "creators". If you post anything, if you type anything, if you draw anything, you are a creator. You haven't changed one iota, but your label changed and someone genius in marketing just justified his or her Masters by putting a new ribbon on the barrel of shit.
Other then Windows 10 being annoyingly persistent in frequent upgrades, sketchy updates that many times require more updates to fix. Besides the crappy apps I get every time a upgrade comes out of which I never will use and don't want. Well at least I have switched 80% of my PC's to something other then Windows. I thought I had endured the worst of Windows such as Me, Vista, Win 8. But obviously Microsoft has a learning disability about its past and not repeating mistakes over and over.
I've got a bunch of W10 home laptops to look after. Before anyone tells me to get "Pro", it's an inherited problem and there's no budget to upgrade. These are your entry level lenovo "back-to-school" budget models with adequate memory and HDD, but Celeron processors.
I'm playing a never-ending round of trying to get all these machines to the same OS/patch level before I can block windows update servers at the router firewall. 1709 was a 5GB update over domestic ADSL (~13MBits down), so I tried letting the first one update, then switch on the Delivery Optimisation so that the next laptop I turned on would be able to get the updates locally. I wasn't able to confirm it, but *perhaps* it happened a little faster. It took a week to get them all done.
While that was happening I set about finding and adapting powershell scripts to remove the games and disable cortana, turn off the telemetry, and disable Windows Update. i just needed to get them all to the same level before I activate a ruleset at the router. The script was successful (and fast), so I'll put it into the Task Scheduler to run every logon. When i get the time, I'll investigate disabling the Windows Upgrade Assistant, which appears to not need or use the Windows Update service (or BITS).
It's frustrating, because i shouldn't have to play whack-a-mole with Microsoft.
They sentenced me to twenty years of boredom
Darn, I was hoping for spring break update
Also, I still use my iPhone 6S and I save 65$ a month by keeping using it. As a very special customer, I can get a new free phone from Sprint whenever I want!
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Also, I have updated my sig yet one more time! I am now selling vacuum cleaners, going door to door while picking up second-hand lottery tickets at the same time!
Now, talk about efficiency! We will see who gets the last laugh when I collect all those royalties.
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MOD THIS MEANINGLESS KARMA WHORING COMMENT DOWN!!!
Christopher Dale Reimer, aka cdreimer, aka creimer, aka cashews, is a well-known toxic bachelor and serial digital pest!
Do not allow this tiresome dullard to copy and paste his own Cryptofeces Reimerium back on here to collect karma points!
We just went through the whole process of getting him contained at -1 like medical waste in a BFI container.
If you are not happy about it, complain to management by clicking on "Flag as inappropriate". There is no point in bitching in the comments.
Yesterday, I got a comment about "making fascism great a..." removed from the main thread so there you go!
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It's a typo and should read "Creationist Update".
I feel so sig.
Remember how we all go excited when Microsoft said 10 would be an OS that got updates forever?
Actually, no, I don't remember that. I remember thinking that Microsoft was going to use this as a means to collect data and push ads or subscriptions on to everyone. You'd have to be stupid if you were happy when they announced Windows 10 as a "service".
There is no point in bitching in the comments.
That's not true at all.
Bitching about it in comments is the third component of what we in the information security world refer to as C2^3
C2^3: The Creimer Containment Triad (MISsion):
Mod down comments, story submissions, metamod. --This is self explanatory
Identify Sockpuppets -- Sockpuppets are attempts to create new accounts that may one day have mod points to undermine Moderation
Shitpost on shitposts -- Slashdot is a pretty group of folks but our opinions are easy to predict, Creimer loved to karma whore fresh threads with the right opinions. Shitposting ensures he doesn't violate containment by being the first person to post "Ajit Pai is a douchebag" in a net neutrality thread.
Remember your MISsion is keeping Slashdot safe. When he's contained it seems hard to imagine how bad it would be with him making thousands of karma whoring shitposts and advertisements with an army of sockpuppet moderation to defend his karma.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
"Are you're trying to insult"
And I are know that I are am winning because your old crammar gives you away, again!
SUPREME ALERT SUPREME ALERT SUPREME ALERT SUPREME ALERT SUPREME ALERT
The fat nuisance known as cdreimer has somehow clawed his way out of -1 terrible! PLEASE MOD DOWN !!!!!
Oh my. What happened to "one and only one troll", jiggle nuts?
"it would explain why you're still commenting on an old thread."
And what explains your checking on old replies? Narcissism? Why else would you think you can "save slashdot"? No one really cares about you and your stupid videos. We do like throwing meat at the chained yard dog however.
Woof woof, dummy!