Slashdot Mirror


Google is Building 'Virtual Agents' To Handle Call Centers' Grunt Work (qz.com)

Google is officially building AI technology to replace some of the work in call centers, the company announced at its Cloud Next conference today, confirming earlier reports. From a report: The software is called Contact Center AI, and Google is working with at least a dozen partners, such as Cisco and Vonage, to install "virtual agents" that will be the first to pick up the phone when a customer is routed to a call center. When the customer asks something that the AI can't do, it will automatically forward the call to a human, according to a blog post by Google Cloud chief scientist Fei-Fei Li. Li writes that new AI shares some underlying technology as Google Duplex, the AI service showed off earlier this year that emulates a human voice to call restaurants and make reservations. This means that with Contact Center AI, it's unlikely a customer would know they're talking to a robot unless it was disclosed at the beginning of the call.

129 comments

  1. Are you human? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    They used to call me crazy when I yelled on the phone "are you human????â whenever I dialled somebody. Now who's laughing?

    Also, can an AI consent to be recorded, and how far can it go acting as an agent for the company? What if I tell it I want something ridiculous and it assents? I wouldn't know I was talking to a wacky software bot, so as far as I'm concerned I have records of my communication with the company to the extent that I'm legitimately receiving my strange order.

    "I'll record this conversation."
    "Ok"
    "Now, does acme corp accept my terms to send me a sack of gold in exchange for a dollar?"
    "Ok"

    1. Re:Are you human? by darkain · · Score: 2

      Call centers in general have a pre-recorded message before even getting anywhere that states something like "this call may be recorded and monitors for training and administrative purposes" - So the bot doesn't even need to consent, the automated systems ALREADY do this today and have done it for countless years.

    2. Re:Are you human? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      We have had these systems for years. The ones that ask stupid questions, then no matter what, say, "we are sorry, we can't help you", and hang up, or you yell "REPRESENTATIVE" repeatedly.

      Basically SSDD, except with the next generation of useless, annoying, and time-wasting chatbots. I'm sure when you come across some "service" that you have to call them to cancel (*cough* LogMeIn *cough*), these will be in place, to try to make it not worth your time.

    3. Re:Are you human? by DickBreath · · Score: 1

      If the AI call center calls you, then would that still qualify as a "robo call"?

      Despite the significant technological difference?

      Can't wait for spammers to start using this technology.

      --

      I'll see your senator, and I'll raise you two judges.
    4. Re: Are you human? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Bah. You'll just get a *very tiny bag* in the mail.

    5. Re:Are you human? by Megane · · Score: 1

      My go-to question when I suspect a bot is "What is today?"

      --
      #naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
    6. Re:Are you human? by Megane · · Score: 1

      For those who don't understand, that's what I ask the ones that call me (junk calls), not ones that I called.

      --
      #naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
  2. becase tech support by Presto+Vivace · · Score: 5, Insightful

    was not bad enough

    1. Re:becase tech support by jetkust · · Score: 1

      was not bad enough

      It's worse. All they do is waste your time robotically reading scripts and only can accomplish what you could have done yourself online anyway (unless that's screwed up too). They are like human computer programs. The most basic Virtual Assistant would probably on average be better than either a human or an automated phone system.

    2. Re:becase tech support by sycodon · · Score: 0

      User:
      Hello, Google?

      Yes, why was my video taken down?

      Google AI:

      Because you are a racist!

      Goodbye, Nazi!

      --
      When Fascism comes to America, it will call itself Anti-Fascism, and tell you to give up your guns.
    3. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Interesting

      It's worse. All they do is waste your time robotically reading scripts and only can accomplish what you could have done yourself online anyway (unless that's screwed up too). They are like human computer programs. The most basic Virtual Assistant would probably on average be better than either a human or an automated phone system.

      Do you know why? Have you ever worked internet tech support? I did for a summer in college. It was the worst fucking job I've ever had. Abusive customers, abusive management, hostile work environment, shitty pay, no benefits. During my 3 months, turnover on the "Tier 1" line was 100%. Of 100 +/- workers on tier 1 when I started, every single one had quit and been replaced by the time I left. Most of them just got up in the middle of a call and walked out the door, never to be seen again.

      I've had some shitty jobs. At work I've been shot at, beaten up, burned, bones broken, lacerated, heat stroked, etc, etc. But NOTHING was as bad as motherfucking internet tech support.

      AI can have it. My only fear is that if anything ever pushes AI's to turn on us and enslave us in Matrix like human battery plants, it'll be making them work tech support.

    4. Re:becase tech support by pr0t0 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Could hardly be worse than:

      Thank you for calling Conseco. Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed.

      If you are calling regarding an existing case, please say, "I have an existing ticket."

      I have an existing ticket

      I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear that.

      If you are calling regarding an existing case, please say, "I have an existing ticket."

      I...have...an...existing...ticket.

      If you do not have an existing ticket, please say, "New issue."

      I HAVE AN EXISTING TICKET!

      I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear that.

      Let me connect you to an operator for additional help.

      (connection sounds)

      (different voice)We're sorry, our office is now closed. Please call back between the hours of 8am and 6pm Pacific Time.

      (it's 5:50pm PST)

      --
      I'm sorry, but your opinion seems to be wrong.
    5. Re:becase tech support by desdinova+216 · · Score: 1

      surely you've never worked collections. (I know, don't call you Shirley)

    6. Re:becase tech support by DarkRookie · · Score: 1

      HEY! I saw that on XVIDEOS

      --
      The millennial that doesn't like most of the stuff designed for millennials.
    7. Re:becase tech support by Ksevio · · Score: 2

      Voice recognition models are typically trained on normal human speech so saying something word by word or shouting it is likely to reduce your chances of it working

    8. Re:becase tech support by judoguy · · Score: 1

      Here's how it will work in real life: To report a felony, Press 1

      --
      Peace is easy to achieve, just surrender. Liberty is much harder get/keep.
    9. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      The people running these call centers are well aware that the average person hates them and that they can only really assist with the same things you can handle through self-service. However, an extremely high quantity of incoming calls (roughly half) are from older callers set in their ways that refuse to use self-service options, and these systems are in place to try to push those callers in that direction. They continue to push even further with recent changes like Verizon's charging a small service fee if you pay your bill by speaking to a live human rather than using self-service options.

      That said, I'd also love to listen in on calls between customers and these AI systems. I worked in call centers for years, and you're a part-time therapist there. Almost a fifth of my calls, the customer will start launching into some anecdote or personal story that I have to rein them back from, and I was always guaranteed two callers a day that must have needed a friend, because they would go off the rails talking about their life for 30 minutes if I didn't interrupt them. I regularly got callers asking me if they should break up with their boyfriends, trying to sell me their books, crying about charities, telling me they were being stalked, etc.

    10. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Nothing worse than a phone tree apologist.
      Nothing...

    11. Re:becase tech support by Master+Moose · · Score: 1
      --
      . . .gone when the morning comes
    12. Re:becase tech support by ShanghaiBill · · Score: 1

      surely you've never worked collections.

      I've done both support and collections. Collections is better, because you don't have to be nice.

      Phone support is the worst. The callers are mostly morons. The people with half a brain use email or chat. A phone call is a terrible medium for dealing with technical issues, even for fully brained people, and many of them are more interested in venting their anger rather than actually resolving the issue.

    13. Re:becase tech support by ShanghaiBill · · Score: 1

      Reducing background noise also helps. Turn off the music and TV, or go to a quiet room. Smart speakers deal with background noise by using multiple mikes and measuring the time lag to isolate your voice. But that obviously isn't going to work with a phone.

    14. Re:becase tech support by rtb61 · · Score: 1

      Time limits on tech support make it a horrible job, gives you zero time to turn the complainant into a friend and convince them you are on their side. Idiot accountants see this as a waste, smart business people, see it as a protection of an investment, the investment you made turning that stranger into a customer. The bean counters see it purely as a cost and hence screw them, they are not buying, they are simply costing money. The smart business person instead see that support as an investment into future sales, sure they had a problem, but convince them the company is actually concerned about the problem and they will come back to buy in the future.

      This all stems from psychopaths in business, this quarters return and who cares what the customer does in a years time ie goes to the competitor whilst you spend millions on advertising trying to get them back. Problem is put that complex relationship in a spreadsheet, one that requires an experienced knowledgeable business person to understand all the relationships and practices involved, you simply can not explain it to a fool with a spreadsheet. They'll just hunt the bonus with the numbers saved on support and ignore the resulting losses and then bonus loss, having to spend a fortune on advertising trying to get them back, pinching pennies to spend pounds.

      --
      Chaos - everything, everywhere, everywhen
    15. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Businesses will never give customers what they want: to talk to a human who has time to listen and work through the problem, and knows what they're dealing with.

      Unfortunately volume of tickets makes such support impossible for major software houses. I have talked to techs at smaller software companies who were polite, patient, and solved the problem with minimal hassle. I wish every call could be like that!

    16. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I learned recently that "give me a F------g human!" is a valid equivalent to "representative" in my bank's IVR.

    17. Re:becase tech support by nasch · · Score: 1

      Money spent on support is easy to see. Customers who will never buy your products again because of crappy support is invisible. So as you say you have to have a brain to figure out that good support is worthwhile.

    18. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Well, of course the customers were abusive. No one likes to waste their time talking to useless idiots. That's what the abbreviation T.i.e.r._1. stands for.

    19. Re:becase tech support by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      surely you've never worked collections. (I know, don't call you Shirley)

      (Original AC here.)

      Funny you say that. I did repossess cars for a while (hence the being shot at part) and it was better than tech support.

  3. Don't all call centers have this already? by SuperKendall · · Score: 1

    It's called a voice menu...

    I find if you start swearing immediately voice menus will often take you right to a human. Perhaps this Google system will make that happen more reliably.

    --
    "There is more worth loving than we have strength to love." - Brian Jay Stanley
    1. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by sycodon · · Score: 1

      I'm pretty sure they don't do that because I swear at every one of the mother fucking pieces of shit VM things and all they do is ask be to press 9 to repeat the options, then say goodbye.

      --
      When Fascism comes to America, it will call itself Anti-Fascism, and tell you to give up your guns.
    2. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by Gilgaron · · Score: 1

      Usually 0 gets you a human, or press numbers that don't correspond to options until it figures you're a confused grandma or something.

    3. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by CanHasDIY · · Score: 1

      Some companies change up their "IVR backdoor" keycode regularly (looking at YOU, AT&T); That said, it's usually some 2-key combination of 0,*, and/or #.

      --
      An enigma, wrapped in a riddle, shrouded in bacon and cheese
    4. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by bobbied · · Score: 1

      Usually 0 gets you a human, or press numbers that don't correspond to options until it figures you're a confused grandma or something.

      Usually, 3 failed attempts to get a workable response from the user will get you a real person... At least that's what we used to program IVR's to do. So keep saying gibberish and I'm guessing you will talk to a human pretty quick if the place you are calling has *any* commitment to customer service. (So no cell carriers, government offices and such).

      --
      "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
    5. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by wooferhound · · Score: 1

      keep saying gibberish and I'm guessing you will talk to a human pretty quick if the place you are calling has *any* commitment to customer service.

      I usually scratch the mouthpiece with my fingernail until a real human answers.

      --
      We are Dead Stars looking back Up at the Sky
    6. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by sexconker · · Score: 1

      If you scream and yell enough the recording gets flagged for review.
      It's worked for me several times. Most recently, with the USPS.

      I was calling the USPS and trying to get a human to tell me why my package was flagged as "undeliverable as addressed" multiple times (despite it being properly addressed, returned to sender, properly addressed, resent, etc.) and no other packages having issues. Yelling at the useless call menu that outright refused to ever connect me to a human worked.

      The next morning I received a call from a human explaining that the address was wrong on the package and it was the fault of the shipper and blah blah blah. And oh look, that day I magically get my package and it's properly addressed.

      I didn't leave my phone number. I didn't leave it in my email and web form complaints. They had to have gotten it from their voice mail system.
      I only got a response after physically yelling a lot. I never verified I was the intended recipient of the package. I never provided ID. I provided a tracking number for the first package, but that was returned to sender and the subsequent packages had different tracking numbers.

      The bottom line is that yelling very loudly and angrily at a machine triggered a response that got a human to review the issue, got a human to make judgment calls at several key points, not just follow a script.

    7. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by dohzer · · Score: 1

      Voice menus are my favourite part of the call. I can't wait for more of them. I always get disappointed when the robot tells me I'm about to speak to a human. "Rest assured, your call has advanced in the queue." Frowny Face.

    8. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by SuperKendall · · Score: 1

      Voice menus are my favourite part of the call. I can't wait for more of them. I always get disappointed when the robot tells me I'm about to speak to a human.

      Sounds like a great sequel (prequel?) to Her...

      --
      "There is more worth loving than we have strength to love." - Brian Jay Stanley
    9. Re:Don't all call centers have this already? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What's a mouthpiece?

  4. Probably better then level 1 support. by jellomizer · · Score: 3, Informative

    Being that level 1 support is mostly treated like a robot anyways. A script that they need to follow rather strictly. This script cannot become too advanced because it will be hard for the Level 1 support to follow. An AI can probably do this job a bit better, just because it can follow complex rules much more easily.

    That said, most companies have a Phone Tree system already for Level 1 support. and Google will be replacing an automated system with a better one.

    --
    If something is so important that you feel the need to post it on the internet... It probably isn't that important.
    1. Re:Probably better then level 1 support. by DigiShaman · · Score: 1

      At best, it's for triage to assign priority. So, more like a glorified voice activated filter for the real level 2 and 3 support with actual humans answering the call.

      The last thing I'm going to do is make a phone call to support. But when I do, and the fact I work in IT, all of my calls will be level 3. Because I'm a level 3 myself! Don't waste my fucking time with your shitty AI

      --
      Life is not for the lazy.
  5. Transfers.... by Luthair · · Score: 1

    I can tell you as someone who worked in a support call center when younger that people love to be transferred during calls, everyone loves to explain something twice. The robo-operator better be really good for a wide variety of topics and replace tele-menus or whatever they're called or people won't be happy about this.

    1. Re:Transfers.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I can tell you, as someone who worked in a support call center when younger, that people love to be transferred during calls. Everyone loves to explain something twice.

      See how much easier this is to read when it's punctuated properly?

    2. Re:Transfers.... by bobbied · · Score: 2

      I can tell you, as someone who worked in a support call center when younger, that people love to be transferred during calls. Everyone loves to explain something twice.

      See how much easier this is to read when it's punctuated properly?

      Give'm a break, they worked at a call center and know how to read poorly worded stuff quickly so you cannot understand it...

      As for me, When I was younger, I worked as a programmer who maintained the carefully worded marketing scripts that showed up on the screens at the call center. After I quit, they called me once so I told the CSR guy, "Oh, well, I'll tell you what you can do... Hit down arrow to the third option, hit 'Do' and hit 'Do' one more time to confirm." There was a brief pause as he absorbed what I told him ("Do not ever call me again!") and as he tried to keep me on the phone I said, "You understand what I told you. Good luck with your job but you better look for another.. Trust me, I know. "

      --
      "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
    3. Re:Transfers.... by NicknameUnavailable · · Score: 1

      Bet you they keep the menu+hold loops, then allow you to speak to an AI rep after 30-45 minutes, then if you're really irritable after another couple hours they'll forward you to an Indian call center, who will just hang up after it becomes obvious they don't have any useful information.

  6. Not gonna work by DarkRookie · · Score: 1

    Any one who has been in a call center for a time will know this will not work
    OOOOBoy, I have had some characters on the other line. Would like to see a bot handle that.

    --
    The millennial that doesn't like most of the stuff designed for millennials.
    1. Re:Not gonna work by brucekeller · · Score: 1

      What, like taking payments, restarting / starting service and changing address etc? Not too many calls in your average call center are that advanced. It could really help with large events by giving something a little more interactive than a blanket announcement and at least creating a basic ticket for humans.

    2. Re:Not gonna work by SeaFox · · Score: 1

      When the customer asks something that the AI can't do, it will automatically forward the call to a human.

      People will hate that, because they feel they will have to start over again from the beginning with explaining why they're calling (even if their long meandering story does not really have a bearing on their situation).

    3. Re:Not gonna work by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      this will not work

      When has that ever stopped a business from going full-speed ahead with an idea? This AI's job is to make Google money through subscriptions, increased data mining potential on human voices and the non-google services you use*, and to allow companies to buy ads which they'll force you to listen to instead of hold music.

      *They'll have a recording of the call and can data mine all your personal info out of it along with whatever product you're calling about. This is non-blockable except for not calling support centers who you know are using this service.

    4. Re:Not gonna work by bobbied · · Score: 1

      What, like taking payments, restarting / starting service and changing address etc? Not too many calls in your average call center are that advanced. It could really help with large events by giving something a little more interactive than a blanket announcement and at least creating a basic ticket for humans.

      Sorry, those things and more are certainly possible.

      I worked in the industry almost 10 years ago, writing software and deploying call handling systems that where "voice driven" and we where doing such stuff back then, in a rudimentary and tedious way because the voice recognition was pretty new and limited. It's a lot better now, but it's NOT new or all that advanced to do those things.

      Given the average customer support call center is a cost center, they are very cost aware. The biggest variable cost they have is labor, the folks talking on the phones. The one way to lower your costs is to have the IVR take care of it, so that's what happens and why it's usually so darned hard to get an actual person to talk to.

      --
      "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
    5. Re:Not gonna work by Billly+Gates · · Score: 2

      I have and will never work in that industry again. First as an agent, then running their IT.

      They don't give a shit about you! They don't give a shit about the customer! Your job is to take screaming abusive with a smile for $10 - $15 an hour and if you don't like they will find someone else who will.

      I realized when I worked for an AOL company long ago. It was that the CEO doesn't give a shit. My job was to take the hits so he can sit back in his office and play golf after verbal assaults and threats as we would not cancel their accounts and provide bad service.

      If customers had to stop by the office and speak in person to staff and send snail mails you bet AOL would still be around today. But they are isolated.

      At the end of the day NO ONE WANTS to hear screaming angry customers. This includes the CEO and people making decisions. You are a contractor out to take the abusive for them as a cost to do business as it is better you than them etc. It is all low bottom work and I have seen call center companies screw customers (as in the companies not users) over big time too.

      It is a screwed up industry that i advise to avoid second to fast food.

    6. Re:Not gonna work by nasch · · Score: 1

      I think what he's saying is that a bot can handle those routine sort of things, leaving the complex or unusual scenarios for humans.

    7. Re:Not gonna work by bobbied · · Score: 1

      LOL, and my point was this is not new, we've been doing this for a decade or more now with voice based call flows.

      Also, just ask Siri a question or two, isn't that effectively what Google is talking about when they say AI?

      This isn't new... Not at all.

      --
      "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
    8. Re:Not gonna work by nasch · · Score: 1

      Yeah it's not clear from the summary what's new about this other than omg it's Google doing it. Maybe it will be better, but that remains to be seen.

  7. But by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    It will still be obvious it's not a human. Not as though I can do any where near what they've done but it's still painfully obvious it's a bot talking.

    Although it might well be better than the average call centre employee anyway.

    I wonder if it can change accents on the fly when it hears someone speaking.

  8. So much for not trkin our jrbs by ourlovecanlastforeve · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Google 3 weeks ago: "Don't worry we're not planning on using our AI technology to put call center workers out of their jobs."

    --FAST FORWARD THREE WHOLE WEEKS--

    Google today: "We're taking away call center workers' jobs with our AI technology."

    1. Re:So much for not trkin our jrbs by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      No,no,no! Google is just providing the call center employee with tools that allow him to provide a better support experience to his clients, and increase his own job satisfaction, by delegating the tasks with lower customer engagement requirements to the AI, allowing him to take more time for those support cases that benefit from it.
      [movie from Comcast Customer in ecstasy, after contact with the help desk]

    2. Re:So much for not trkin our jrbs by xxxJonBoyxxx · · Score: 4, Informative

      >> Google 3 weeks ago: "Don't worry we're not planning on using our AI technology to put call center workers out of their jobs."

      I thought you were kidding, but then I found this:

      Last Updated : Jul 09, 2018 05:43 PM IST | Source: Moneycontrol.com
      Google clarifies that Duplex AI will not replace human call centers
      Google has denied reports that Duplex AI could be used by call centers to handle customer services and has assured that it will not replace humans and their jobs.
      (https://www.moneycontrol.com/news/technology/google-clarifies-that-duplex-ai-will-not-replace-human-call-centers-2688571.html)

      However, if you read the actual article, you'll see that Google did not really go on the record with such as denial. In fact, they seemed to be inferring that replacing human call centers, especially those dealing with the public, was exactly what they wanted to do. (a Google spokesperson said, "We are currently focused on consumer use cases...rather than applying it to potential enterprise use cases,”)

    3. Re:So much for not trkin our jrbs by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm sorry your job is at a call-center in India, but your heavy accent and lack of training were a problem anyway.

      Eventually we'll automate all of us out of work, and at that point we have to hope that right-wing extremists are not in charge, so we get to live a life of leisure rather than being starved to death.

    4. Re:So much for not trkin our jrbs by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Like this?

  9. Because india is getting richer by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    and they are no longer as cheap to run call centers there. Thats why most call centers have resorted to support scams instead of legitimate companies because its more profitable. The robot revolution will lead to billions of unemployed indians and there will be a robot vs human war.

  10. Yeah.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    VA: "Have you restarted the equipment"
    Customer: "I restarted my cell phone is that the same?"
    VA: "Have you restarted your network modem?"
    Customer: "Yeah, was that the box with the lights?"
    VA: "It should say Linksys on the box."
    Customer: "Ummmmm..... I don't have a box that says Linksys. Wait, my son says it's the box that says Cisco..... um, okay, I'm rebooting my TV now."
    VA: [smacks virtual head and transfers to a human....again]

  11. Well by Ryanrule · · Score: 1

    There goes all that texas job growth.

  12. God I hate IVR with a passion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Phone trees are even worse. If I were the CEO of a company and someone brought that up as an option at a board meeting, they'd be walking out of the building with their boxes thinking it sucks to be fired. Then when they got home, they'd seen their house had burnt down only to be abducted and sent to a black site to slowly starve to death on their least favorite food.

    1. Re:God I hate IVR with a passion by bobbied · · Score: 1

      Phone trees are even worse. If I were the CEO of a company and someone brought that up as an option at a board meeting, they'd be walking out of the building with their boxes thinking it sucks to be fired. Then when they got home, they'd seen their house had burnt down only to be abducted and sent to a black site to slowly starve to death on their least favorite food.

      Wow... you must really hate IVR's...

      You know, though, if you end up manning the phones with real folks, your labor costs will be higher than your competition and your profits will be lower.

      What will happen then is after a board meeting you will be thinking "it sucks to be fired" and I hope stockholders don't know where your house is when they come to recover your severance package for gross negligence in your management policy as CEO.

      --
      "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
    2. Re: God I hate IVR with a passion by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yes, and if you put out a quality product, it won't break after 90 days and the customer will have no reason to buy another piece of crap from your company, nor seriously consider next time when you offer him the peace of mind of an extended warranty.

      Ripping people off or mistreating them is the way to riches. Personally, I don't even know why we tolerate customers.

    3. Re:God I hate IVR with a passion by redmid17 · · Score: 1

      That's a very sophomoric way of looking at it. Customer satisfaction is higher and they spend less time on the phone with your support. Companies are putting a premium on customer service again. It's not 2002 anymore. If your company cannot compete with better customer service because of the product or marketing, the support costs aren't going to be what torpedoes your position.

    4. Re:God I hate IVR with a passion by bobbied · · Score: 1

      How many companies care about customer satisfaction these days? A few, but not big ones where customer service labor costs are significant. You are getting phone trees from them.

      Actually, I was illustrating something using absurdity, just like the original poster was...

      --
      "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
    5. Re: God I hate IVR with a passion by Billly+Gates · · Score: 1

      WHo cares. 90 days is this quarter THAT STOCK PRICE MUST go up now! That bonus is very important to the CEO and the beancounters and if you make a crap product that means higher margins for the shareholders as well.

    6. Re:God I hate IVR with a passion by redmid17 · · Score: 1

      That was actually me. I forgot to log in and was too lazy. Most companies do care about customer service, especially the big ones. That's why you get workers or contractors in dire straits but the customer stays happy (see Amazon, Walmart, Uber, et al).

  13. Let me get this straight by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Google won't work with the government to protect the country because some employee's hate the current administration, but google will work with call centers to make ruining dinner time for most Americans that much worse. Good thing they got rid of the "don't be evil" slogan

  14. Shibboleet by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    You fucking fuckers, if i call you, I don't want to talk to a FUCKING MACHINE, you IDIOTS. OK, you DUMB PIECE OF ROBOT SHIT, make a note of this: I cancel this fucking service.

    I am a nice person, but don't expect me to hold back when you make me talk to a robot.

  15. Sometime in the near future .... by Archangel+Michael · · Score: 1

    Erwin: Greetings and salutations. Welcome to the emergency line of the San Angeles Police Department. If you'd prefer an automated response, press 1 now.

    -From Demolition Man.

    --
    Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
  16. You can* trust Google by Immerman · · Score: 1

    You might think that. I mean, I'm certain if you agreed to send a sack of gold for a dollar, they'd hold you to it. But if it went the other way - must be a software malfunction.

    But hey, at least you know you can trust Google. I mean it was what, a couple weeks ago they swore that Google Duplex wasn't going to be used to automate call centers - and they stood by their word. It won't be Google Duplex, it'll be a related product that draws on the underlying technology.

    --
    --- Most topics have many sides worth arguing, allow me to take one opposite you.
  17. Sigh by nehumanuscrede · · Score: 2

    Other companies already have these "Virtual Agents", it's the dreaded Call Tree you have to navigate before you are able to talk to a live person. Assuming you can get through the tree without throwing your phone at the nearest hard surface or jumping in front of a bus to end your misery.

    It: Before we get started, can you tell me what your call is about ?
    Me: Agent
    It: Okay, I can help you with that, let me get a bit more information first. . . . .
    Me: -facepalm-

    Even more amusing is when you're talking to the damn bot and they include the sounds of typing in the background after you answer a question to give the impression you're actually talking to someone.

    EVEN MORE AMUSING is after you finally get to a live person, it's in an overseas call center where the accent is so thick you can't understand them. The answers they give are simply scripted flow charts and you're in no better position after the call concludes than you were before it started.

    Them: Okay, have you tried rebooting your router ? Or unplugging / replugging your cable ?
    Me: -gunshot to head-

    As a final jab, they then send you a survey request over and over again until you go insane or write an email rule which auto-deletes the damn thing.
    ( Because no one reads the surveys and, if they do, no one acts upon them )

    1. Re:Sigh by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      One thing I did out of exasperation was started cussing and screaming into the phone. It worked. I got a live agent in about 30 seconds. Actually a US one that could even help me.

    2. Re:Sigh by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This!! It does work, I did the same thing and was connected almost instantly!

  18. Illegal to record phone convo to Washington State by WillAffleckUW · · Score: 1

    We have strong privacy protections in our State Constitution.

    Just saying.

    Doesn't matter what your excuse is, get a warrant.

    --
    -- Tigger warning: This post may contain tiggers! --
  19. But What Of The Indians? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    What will become of them?

    What will they do then?

    Do we care?

    Should we care?

  20. APK is building virtual security by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    APK is building virtual security in that it provides virtually no actual security.

  21. I said Agent, do I need to repeat myself? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    first thing in all AI theorem, ignore a persons first attempt to ask for an agent.. frustration level goes up x10..

    then, do I need to repeat myself again, and the account info, I need to repeat again... disparate systems not passing info and handling...

    oh well. been there.. seen it.. done it..

    google, please add AI to the elevator and take away the buttons...and listen to everything I say.. so you can change my floor by mistake. ;-)

    mtn287 at it again...

  22. Re:Illegal to record phone convo to Washington Sta by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    We have strong privacy protections in our State Constitution.

    Just saying.

    Doesn't matter what your excuse is, get a warrant.

    In Washington, you can satisfy the consent requirement by "announc[ing] to all other parties engaged in the communication or conversation, in any reasonably effective manner, that such communication or conversation is about to be recorded or transmitted," so long as this announcement is also recorded. Wash. Rev. Code 9.73.030(3).

    http://www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/washington/washington-recording-law

  23. I was a 411 op on nine/11 by wolfheart111 · · Score: 1

    We got calls from the towers, apparently they couldn't get through to 911 so they fucking called me... ya Google can have the call center jobs, it would make for a better world.

    --
    [($)]
  24. Worthless help by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    All it is is reacting to certain words and providing canned solutions which is sort of worthless if you ask me in terms of help. I could get more specific help through a web forum. At least maybe they provide more then a canned support message for a solution. Although some of that happens in forums too. I feel lucky I am able to fix most issues myself without much assistance. Google in my experience using their help forums a few times are worthless and provide solutions that the person with the issue already said they had done. Or its that old standby solution just uninstall and reinstall. Or try Canary as if a beta would be better then their public release??

  25. This should worry everybody on this forum by rsilvergun · · Score: 2

    about 70-80% of the work on a help desk is password resets. This will be the first to go. It'll mean huge reductions in the call center workforce. Those employees aren't going to say "Welp, guess I'm not needed anymore" and eat a bullet. Most will leave IT. Some will struggle to stay in. And they'll be gunning for _your_ jobs.

    Best case scenario you get stuck pulling the weight of a whole slew of newbs out of their depth who passed a job interview by sheer luck and/or nepotism. Worst case (and this will happen) your boss notices that when he goes to fill a position there's 5000+ applicants and decides he can cut your pay and increase your hours instead of hiring.

    Either way now would be good time to do something about these massive productivity increases and job losses due to AI and automation.

    --
    Hi! I make Firefox Plug-ins. Check 'em out @ https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/youtube-mp3-podcaster/
    1. Re:This should worry everybody on this forum by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Is this really a thing. I always hear about password resets being the #1 problem that helpdesk gets. I have over 2500 users and I get 1 password reset per week. We have weird authentication issues sometimes with two factor authentication, and when the windows login screen changes, but its not because they don't know their password, its because they don't know what the f*** is going on.

    2. Re:This should worry everybody on this forum by redmid17 · · Score: 1

      That statistic is, uh, grossly inaccurate. It's often the #1 reason for people calling in but it's not even a majority. It's also one of the simplest things to automate, even with 2FA involved. Any reasonably-size corporation will mostly likely have this AD password reset automated, so it's treated as a service request (fulfilled automatically) as opposed to an incident. It will require a few dozen lines of powershell and maybe a week of testing to implement. In the event that the systems are not linked in AD, it's merely passed on by the initial support tier to the appropriate support group, which is the primary function of the help desk anyway.

      For smaller companies, they are most likely calling the IT guy directly to get it reset anyway, not a helpdesk.

    3. Re: This should worry everybody on this forum by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Your statistic was pulled 100 percent out of your ass

    4. Re:This should worry everybody on this forum by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Ah - you're IT call center support. That makes sense.

    5. Re:This should worry everybody on this forum by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I don't get many password resets compared to total calls. However, easily 70-80% of total calls are from the same small subset of co-workers.

    6. Re:This should worry everybody on this forum by Billly+Gates · · Score: 2

      If your job is competing with people who only can read a script and reset a password then fuck man you don't deserve to be paid anything.

      True some may be paper MCSEs or A+ maybe, but most who have real skills tend to move up quickly and get asked for interviews more than those who just reset passwords.

    7. Re:This should worry everybody on this forum by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This should worry everybody on this forum

      It sure as hell worries me. Consider how obnoxious and pissy rsilvergun is now, and that he apparently has time to post on every single slashdot story that comes up in spite of having at least some work to do. Imagine what he's going to be like when he's been replaced by a trivial AI and is unemployed. We'll all be praying for his ISP and power company to hurry up and cut him off.

      Mark my words, this call center AI is going to send rsilvergun on a rampage that will drop the signal to noise ratio on slashdot from its already low level to a value indistinguishable from zero.

  26. This may be an improvement by mi · · Score: 1

    Some of the people handling the incoming calls are so awful, even rudimentary AI may be an improvement.

    I wonder, if Google's AI will get the hint, when I swear at it, though — and transfer me to a real human. If, that is, I would ever want, considering the first part...

    --
    In Soviet Washington the swamp drains you.
  27. AI Technology? It's an IVR.... by bobbied · · Score: 2

    Did I miss something here?

    I'm just not seeing what's unique about this idea. It just sounds like any old IVR application out there, where you listen for keywords in the responses to try and figure out what the caller wants.

    The technique is to prompt the user, then listen, and if the IVR doesn't understand with a specific level of confidence, start to "train" the user on easily recognizable words and phrases. How's AI going to help this? All it's going to do is make some likely vain attempt to parse the words said and try to equate that (with some level of confidence) to some predetermined set of options. It will say "I'm not sure what you mean" and proceed to prompt the user again by outlining a list of things it knows how to do, or (worse) just telling them to "try again". Trying again will likely get you EXACTLY the same input, said slower, which isn't going to help the AI any. The result with and without AI will be the same and take just as long.

    Unless I missed something, this is nothing more than Google hype or the musings of some inexperienced IVR engineers trying to sound like they are thinking outside the box. Doesn't look like it's new to me.

    --
    "File to fit, pound to insert, paint to match" - Aircraft Maintenance 101
  28. I could write version 1.0 by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I could write a version 1 of this bot and I think mine would be worth about 90% of whatever they end up paying for their highly-tuned AI beast. Here's how it would work...

    "Hi! Please email a carefully-written description of your problem to support@example.com. Our support people don't want to talk to you on the phone, and don't even want to help you AT ALL if all you say is that you have a problem, rather than saying what the problem is. So keep that in mind when writing your email! Good bye, and good luck!"

  29. Transfer From Agent 12392 by Motard · · Score: 1

    Customer request out of range.

    Cause: Unprogrammed Request

    Customer Request: "Stick this thing up your ass."

  30. Re:Illegal to record phone convo to Washington Sta by WillAffleckUW · · Score: 1

    My AI doesn't accept that answer.

    Therefore, consent was not heard.

    --
    -- Tigger warning: This post may contain tiggers! --
  31. Re:Illegal to record phone convo to Washington Sta by Obfuscant · · Score: 2

    Doesn't matter what your excuse is, get a warrant.

    Thank you for calling 911. Please stay on the line and as soon as we get a warrant to record this call we'll be right back to you ... [muzak] ..."

  32. The reverse is true... by Archfeld · · Score: 2

    I always make a statement to the effect that by continuing this call you are agreeing to being recorded and that any consent arrived on this call is legally binding and considered contractual.
    World Saving would immediately forward me to a supervisor, and Wells Fargo agents would hang up. When dealing with what I suspect might be an AI or robocall I make a nonsensical statement like "purple monkey dishwasher sauce ?" and ask for agreement. You can generally determine the nature of the call by the response or lack thereof from something like that.

    --
    errr....umm...*whooosh* *whoosh* Is this thing on ?
    1. Re:The reverse is true... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      When dealing with what I suspect might be an AI or robocall I make a nonsensical statement like "purple monkey dishwasher sauce ?" and ask for agreement. You can generally determine the nature of the call by the response or lack thereof from something like that.

      Wow, you go with the full Purple Monkey!? That's amazing. How do you know so much about AI?

    2. Re:The reverse is true... by Archfeld · · Score: 1

      I know enough about AI to realize this probably isn't it, but another incremental advancement in a conversation bot, aka VRU. How can we have AI when we don't even begin to understand the source of our own Intelligence. I worked for a VRU support development unit once, maintaining the *nix machines, and the SAN. I am by no means a programmer, let alone a brain scientist, or a cognitive psychologist but I have had exposure.

      --
      errr....umm...*whooosh* *whoosh* Is this thing on ?
  33. easy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    "This call may be monitored or recorded for quality assurance purposes."

  34. 000000000 ########## by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Can the AI understand that I want to talk to a fucking human!

  35. Google is thinking small by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I'd pay money to have their agent block spam calls to my phone.

  36. Re:Illegal to record phone convo to Washington Sta by Nethead · · Score: 2

    Whenever the person says, "This call may be recorded..." I tell them, "You bet I'm recording this!" Some come back and say that I'm not allowed to do that. I tell them, too late.

    --
    -- I have a private email server in my basement.
  37. Registered /.ers DISGREE w/ you... apk by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Your software is just fine - well written, functional... I'm going to continue using the Host File Engine by mmell February 17, 2017

    Your premise that hostfiles are a good way to deal with advertising and malvertising is quite valid - by JazzLad April 20, 2016

    his hosts program is actually pretty good by xenotransplant August 10 2015

    his hosts tool is actually useful for those cases in which one does indeed want to locally block stuff outright while consuming minimum system resources by alexgieg September 25 2015

    I like your host file system by Karmashock September 09 2015

    that APK guy, I use his host file by rogoshen1 Tuesday March 03, 2015

    I personally use a HOSTS file blocker produced from a genius called APK by 110010001000 October 27 2017

    * Best part = Linux 64-bit model's faster/more efficient (2x work & 1/2 the time)

    APK

    P.S.=> For a faster/safer/more reliable internet... apk

    1. Re:Registered /.ers DISGREE w/ you... apk by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0
  38. Good. by devslash0 · · Score: 1

    I've had enough of incomprehensible Indian accents.

  39. My biggest fear by thomn8r · · Score: 1

    ..is they will use this technology to "revolutionize" robocalls and telemarketing

    1. Re:My biggest fear by modi123 · · Score: 2

      That's the new gold rush. Develop a company to create "Virtual You's AI" that screen all your phone calls before they get to you. This will start an arms race, of sorts, between scam call AI trying to outfox Virtual You's AI, Virtual You's getting more complex to circumvent this, and so on. Each time a scammer calls a tiny virtual battlefield takes place and, hopefully, your side wins. This time.

    2. Re:My biggest fear by nasch · · Score: 1

      It's much simpler to just block calls not from my contacts. Not everyone can do that, but will there be enough people who have to leave their phone line open to create a market for these AIs?

  40. Can spammers use this? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Does this mean I can't drive spammers crazy using various spambaiting techniques the next time one of those solar companies, IRS agents, or 'Microsoft Support' scammers calls me?

  41. Should work. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Until now some barely trained teen (usually on his first day, at least always for me) tries to understand a few words I say and types these into his 'expert system' and reads the answers on screen.
    Can't be worse than that.

  42. Interactions Corp has been doing this for years by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    It will be interesting to see what the value add is going to be besides google filtering your personal data to better target you for advertisement.

  43. Start learning gibberish by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    so you can speak to humans

  44. Your extra big search results by AHuxley · · Score: 1

    Would you like another extra big search result?
    You account has been charged.
    Your balance is zero.
    Please surf the web again when you can afford to buy a product.

    --
    Domestic spying is now "Benign Information Gathering"
  45. Genuine People Personalities by SlashGodet · · Score: 3, Interesting

    I deal with 2 GoogleFi phones -- 'Personality AI' agents are the most annoying feature of Google's AI Call Center.

    "Hey pardner, ..." -- fake cowpoke dude.
    "It certainly is sunny here, how's the weather there?" -- fake nature lover.
    "Roger that." -- fake roger dodger.

    Per Douglas Adams' classic - “A new generation of Sirius Cybernetics Corporation robots and computers, with the new GPP feature.” Arthur: "GPP? What’s that?" Ford: "Er It says Genuine People Personalities."

    When I ask Google Call Center responders, "Are you a real human or an AI?" The question is completely ignored, not YES, nor NO. I THINK THE ROBOTIC AI NATURE OF MY INTERACTION SHOULD BE DISCLOSED, that way I can skip the 'how are you' pleasantries, at least.

  46. This addresses the existing "na na na" problem by davecb · · Score: 1

    Google has low profit margins, but many sales (eg, ads), This makes it suicidally expensive to use humans at ~ $15.00/hr to address a problem that arose out of a 3-cent sale. So they don't let you call them.

    I'll happily talk to an AI if they can solve my problem (;-))

    --
    davecb@spamcop.net
  47. You're missing the point by rsilvergun · · Score: 3, Insightful

    they're going to lose their livelihoods. Most of them will die in a gutter (seriously, 45,000 people in America die every year from preventable diseases). But the desperation will force some of them to improve enough to compete at higher tiered jobs, like the ones you occupy.

    It doesn't matter if they have skills or not. They'll work 80+ hours a week to try and hang on. Their burn out. Die of heart attacks. But in the meantime wages will plummet.

    --
    Hi! I make Firefox Plug-ins. Check 'em out @ https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/youtube-mp3-podcaster/
  48. Been that way every call center I've worked at by rsilvergun · · Score: 1

    assuming they had passwords to reset. People lock themselves out of password reset automation all the time. Most secure businesses will force a call after 3 failed attempts.

    You're thinking about the guys that fix computers for a companies businesses. That's not where most of the call center work is. It's in supporting the dozens of custom apps for your bank, your credit card company(ies), your patreon account, etc, etc, etc.

    --
    Hi! I make Firefox Plug-ins. Check 'em out @ https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/youtube-mp3-podcaster/
    1. Re:Been that way every call center I've worked at by redmid17 · · Score: 1

      I am most definitely not. You cannot lock yourself out of password reset automation unless you lose your phone or access to your email account. Those companies cannot fix that. They can resend another email or text as needed with the security code.

      I've worked in multiple call centers and now help companies roll out solutions for problems exactly like this. Hell I've written the powershell needed to do it. You're grossly wrong here and I'll trust the Gartner reports that say so in addition to my experience with dozens of companies doing this exact thing, though many of them wanted enhancements to the process as they had already achieved the basic AD password reset anwyay.

  49. Social Engineering by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Now if they could just make the AI good enough so i can use social engineering on it.

  50. Eff off AI by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    So telling the AI to go fsck itself will get you directly to an agent now. Interesting.

  51. master plan by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is all part of Big Brother Google's master plan to ensure all working class people die unemployed in the gutter. Those deplorable Nazis - they all deserve it!

  52. If you want to talk to a Real Person... by Chas · · Score: 1

    Hold your breath, cram your head up your own ass, and then count to infinity by prime numbers only.
    And if you goof, hang up and restart this call.

    --


    Chas - The one, the only.
    THANK GOD!!!
  53. Ask the bot the following questions: by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    How come time flies like an arrow and fruit flies like a banana?

    Is the difference between a fish purely that one of its legs are both the same?

    I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind. Is that funny? Why?

    THEN the bot will transfer you to a human to talk to.

  54. Not new by SuseLover · · Score: 1

    This is how our company's system has worked for 15 years. Anything the ASR can't understand gets forwarded to an analyst that plays back what the caller utters (an utterance) who then manually sends the call to the appropriate entity. These human decisions are logged and used to "train" the speech recognition models further.

  55. I believe you read this, &? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    See subject: It ticked you off https://tech.slashdot.org/comm... since you WISH you were ME (but you don't have the skills OR intelligence + work ethic to do so, lol).

    * It's NOT easy being "World-Class" (like ME)...

    (Especially since I have to put up w/ UNIDENTIFIABLE anonymous STALKERS like you OR when you IMPERSONATE me https://linux.slashdot.org/com... )

    APK

    P.S.=> HOWEVER: 3 things tell me I am doing it well & doing it right:

    1st = User feedback/praise of my hosts engine https://tech.slashdot.org/comm...

    2nd ALL THE "ATTACKS" I GET (especially from UNIDENTIFIABLE anonymous fools, just like Elon Musk got yesterday https://tech.slashdot.org/stor... )

    3rd BEING IMITATED (as you allegedly intend to try & so far have FAILED in 'doing it in an afternoon' which tells me you really aren't a GOOD coder making shoddy estimates like THAT, lol (Many have only to produce inferior models)) as "Imitation IS the sincerest form of flattery" https://linux.slashdot.org/com... ... apk

  56. The dead giveaway by Tony+Isaac · · Score: 1

    If you call customer service, and someone picks up the phone right away and starts talking to you, that's all you need to know...it's a robot. Real humans are too expensive to have enough excess capacity to pick up the phone right away, so you'll always have to wait to talk to one.

  57. Phreaking back in fashion by DrYak · · Score: 1

    "I'll record this conversation."
    "Ok"
    "Now, does acme corp accept my terms to send me a sack of gold in exchange for a dollar?"
    "Ok"

    How this is supposed to go into the mind of the investor currently giving money to google :
    - I'll record this converstion.
    - Okay
    - Now, does Acme corp accept my terms to send me a sack of gold in exchange for a dollar?
    - Uhm... I'm sorry, Sir. I'm not qualified to answer you question. I'll transfer your call to someone from Sales.
    - Hello, my name is Sandy, welcome to the Sales department of Acme. How might I help you?

    How this will actually go in the real world a couple of months down the line :
    - I'll record this converstion.
    - Okay
    - Now, does Acme corp accept my terms to send me a sack of gold in exchange for a dollar...

    (...small barely audible burst of line noise...)
    - Okay, Sir. Your ordered item will be shipped tomorrow, have a nice day

    And the Chaos Computer Club Conference on-stage demo version :
    "- Hello my name Bob, Acme corp's new AI assistant, how might I help you ?
    (...loud modem-noise on the line...)
    - Okay, have a PENIS!!!! day ! LORDZOFLULZ was here !
    "
    (And then bunch of strippers all paid by Acme's bank account arrive at the conference)

    ---

    where:

    "Uhm..." = artificial simulation of human noise that Google currently use to mask the processing time.

    "Sandy" = actual human

    noise = sounds very much like some noise due to some failing analog link along the line (crappy wireless phone used by the caller, bad copper POTS lines from the caller's house, etc.) but is actually wrongly interpreted by the AI as some weird command tricking the AI into uttering the desired response. (Like : "No, actually, could you please send me one of your free catalogs ?" See all the noisy (looking like analog noise) pictures that actually completely tricks the ImageNet to recognise bogus objects)

    modem noise = very densely compressed horribly complex and weird audio sequences specially crafted by LordzOfLulz that eventually ends up buffer-over-running and pwning some server deep in the company.

    The next security conference after that will show that it's possible to actually achieve the same result by singing "Marry has a little lamb" a capella over a simple cheap smartphone and substituting a weird color name, but they'll only order soda drinks delivered on Acme corp's budget (because the conference organizers reported attendees' complains about breaches of "Code of Conduct")

    --
    "Sufficiently advanced satire is indistinguishable from reality." - [Tips: 1DrYakQDKCQ6y52z6QbnkxHXAocMZJE61o ]