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Trent Lott Invented the Paperclip!

DRF writes "The Washington Post has a story where Trent Lott claims he invented the paperclip making fun of Gore's earlier claim to have invented the Internet. It's funny. " Interestingly enough, I invented poster putty, lava lamps, DNA, and discovered that ice floats in water. And that was just last week!

56 of 130 comments (clear)

  1. Joel Ness created the internet by Roland · · Score: 1

    Joel ness helped make "info" at the university of minnesota, which became gopher, so joel helped to create to internet, so there, his address is jness@d.umn.edu, tell him how cool he is.

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    whee -Me
  2. WTF is `poster putty'? by stevied · · Score: 1

    Does he mean blu-tack?

  3. George W. Bush for president!!! by Micah · · Score: 1

    He's the man! He actually *knows* something. And he doesn't resemble a tree trunk!

  4. Taking the internet for credit [cards] by Tony+Shepps · · Score: 1

    Well that's off-topic, but I'd wager your credit card problem happened after the secure transaction, not during. Just because the "lock" symbol appears does not mean that the system on the far side is going to protect your information after it gets there.

  5. I invented Microsoft Windows by gavinhall · · Score: 1

    Posted by stodge:

    According to Gores' aides, if I promote MS Windows, does that mean I invented it? So MS owes me billions of dollars. Yay I'm going to be mega-rich!

  6. Campaign 2000 started a year ago by pingouin · · Score: 1
    Glad to see you've started watching. Lott's "joke" is just another lame salvo in the campaign - he would have done better to just keep schtum and bask in the ridicule that Gore was receiving.

    Unfortunately for your hypothesis, it will take quite a bit of marketing genius to pull off a GOP victory. There is much damage to undo, thanks to Hype, Barr, Livingston, Lott, and others who piled on Bubba.

    BTW, Bob, not Liddy, is the real Oprah-like Dole. A prolonged campaign might reveal that.

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  7. Go Mrs. Dole! by pingouin · · Score: 1
    Libby Dole has NEVER been ELECTED to anything in her whole life.

    She was always the "token woman", appointed to be the pretty face in front of ugly policies. She's gotten the chances to put her finishing-school charm to good use, and succeeded - she's also quite capable of doing the job of POTUS. Unfortunately, behind the charm lies a snow job; her presidency would wipe the smile off of many a face.

    [temp sig: my mind is in one time zone, my ass is in another; bear with me. At least I brought my password]

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  8. I am Scum Boy! Bow before me! by pingouin · · Score: 1
    How so? Or are you just a mysoginist?

    Yup 'n' proud of it hyuh hyuh hyuh :)

    No I'm not a mysogynist. I respect Mrs Dole; it's just that I've seen way too many Mrs Doles during my stays in North Carolina (where she's from). Her rise in the GOP ranks comes, in part, because she's very "nice" (in a charm-school-inculcated way). I find her husband to be the more genuine article of the two Doles, which isn't necessarily a compliment to Bob.

    Remember: on election day, we don't just pull the lever for one person. It's very important to take a look at the company that person keeps, and whether or not he (or she!) will keep the more odious company (e.g. the Christian Coalition and supply-side economists) at arms-length. I don't have much faith in Liddy keeping right-wing monsters at bay, however "Oprah-like" she may seem on the campaign trail.

    There's lots of good Republican women: Gov Whitman from New Jersey, and many New Englanders, like Sen Olympia Snowe. I'd vote for either one in a heartbeat, especially if Al Gore were the opponent. But Whitman and Snowe wouldn't survive the right-wing-skewed primary process, and they wouldn't stand a chance in the biggest primary of all: the "Money Primary" - Mrs Dole has spent years preparing for this run by hooking up to the necessary sources of money needed for the bid. That - and name recognition - is why she's a "viable candidate".

    I drove 18 hours from Toronto so I could vote for Clinton last time (a last-minute decision); if I'm out of the country in 2000, I'll probably just smoke a Cuban cigar with the travel expenses I'll save.

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  9. plausible deniability by pingouin · · Score: 1
    Gore wouldn't have made the statement unless he could back it up with something from the Congressional Record. It doesn't have to be necessarily the absolute truth, just some votes and sponsored amendments to bills. It's typical politico stuff, not unique to Our Al. Don't expect any clarification or apology from him.

    But AFAIK, a lot of the events at the beginning of Cringely's Nerds 2.0.1 took place while Gore was a photographer in Vietnam. I could be wrong, though.

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  10. I invented the hot water! by anaZ · · Score: 1

    I invented the hot water!

  11. Yeah, Speaking of "dumb-fucks"... by tjones · · Score: 1

    Quit rationalizing and face the fact that Gore said it.

    He's a typical politician, trying to weasel his way on to the "right" side of an issue. The difference is, this time, he got caught in a bald-faced lie.

    The only thing sleazier than media is rationalizing fools who refuse to believe the truth in defense of "thier" guy.

  12. I thought... by Daniel · · Score: 1

    ...that Microsoft invented the paperclip? Isn't it integrated into Office 98? ;-)

    Daniel

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    Hurry up and jump on the individualist bandwagon!
  13. Trent invents dirty politics! by William+Tanksley · · Score: 1

    A joke about a patently silly statement is dirty politics? Wake up. You may be able to fool some of the people into believing that, but not me. And I hope not the majority of voters.

  14. Sex is not completely bug free by Jeremy+Erwin · · Score: 1

    Chlamydia, ghonorrhoea, HIV, herpes simplex, syphilis, children...

  15. Taking credit for the internet by dattaway · · Score: 1

    Gore can take credit for helping to ban widespread use of cryptography and secure ecommerce on the internet. That's the dark ages to me.

    It might be a coincidence, but a credit card number I used on a dumbed down Internet Explorer web transaction to buy my boss a sound card was later used for $2000 of fraud. It was a shopping spree at Kmart in silicon valley by one person. Nothing but 128 bit encryption for me from now on.

  16. I invented the Wheel.... by burnsbert · · Score: 1

    ...of course my version was square. A rival inventor stole my idea, tweaked it a little, and made a fortune. And I never get any credit.

    -Grog

  17. Trent Lott is an idiot. by Ken+Broadfoot · · Score: 1

    Everyone knows that Microsoft invented the paper clip. It's right there on Outlook.

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    Bitcoin pyramid: Join here: http://www.bitcoinpyramid.com/r/1427 it's FREE!
  18. I Patent The Big Bang by Ken+Broadfoot · · Score: 1


    So there....


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    Bitcoin pyramid: Join here: http://www.bitcoinpyramid.com/r/1427 it's FREE!
  19. Evolution of Useful Things by drowsy · · Score: 1
    read this



    This book will tell all about the paperclip and other stuff. It is well written. You will finish before you realize you have read an entire book on the paperclip, the staple, etc...

  20. George W. Bush for president!!! by akharon · · Score: 1

    I must agree...we definitely need a leader who 1) stands for something, rather than taking a poll and seeing what to do (the publcic can't make up their minds ever anyways), 2) one who won't be another dan quayle, and 3) NOT LIE!. that trusting the leader of your country is a good thing, i don't see people talking about the credibility of tony blair or jean chretien (sp?). this is making a joke of the country, and when you have a guy who rents out the whitehouse for campaign funds, that tells me he believes in self before country...

  21. CmdrTaco Accomplishments.... by anneke · · Score: 1

    actually, yeah, he did. He posted about it ("Rob Finishes College") when he graduated a few months ago, in December.

    -- Anneke

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    "Real Women Use Linux"
  22. I invented Microsoft Windows by kat_skan · · Score: 1

    But then you'd have to promote MS Windows. Ewwwwwwwwwwww

  23. Children by JTek · · Score: 1

    Is it just me, or does this whole thing remind you of elementary school?

    Gore: I invented the internet.
    Repub: Oh yeah? well I invented the paper clip!
    Gore: oh yeah, of course you did, you're a dinosaur!

    Politicians. Hmph!

  24. I invented the electron by dumptruck · · Score: 1

    I invented the electron the neutron and the proton

    This means that anything that has mass of any sort owes me very large amounts of money

    My rate now is 1 us cent per any one of these (there are no bulk rates or site licensees)

    Please pay now

  25. Trent invents dirty politics! by CodeRed · · Score: 1

    Along with the rest of those dirty republicans.

    I'd vote Gore in before any of those other crooks.

    Republicans are the sadest group of politicians in the world today.

    Look at there values... They want to remove freedom of choice just because it might make us think. Yeah, those are winners. Remember last election, and hope it repeats.

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    CodeRed, the lower user #. No relation to SirCam.
  26. Check MSNBC's poll results: by Byteme · · Score: 1
  27. You lie Rob by malus · · Score: 1

    Just jump on that bandwagon '0 theives why don't you. We both know quite well that I invented DNA. Back off, buster. You're risking nuclear attack, which I also invented.

  28. I invented Al Gore by Software+Cowboy · · Score: 1

    Unfortunately, I didn't get all the bugs worked out of the AI routines - witness the claim to have invented the internet. I think what he meant to say was that he invented the @ sign which allows all of us to send email.

    I'll have to upgrade his OS to Linux I guess. In retrospect it was a truly bad idea to try and build anything reliable on NT.

  29. Gore really stepped in it... by trims · · Score: 1

    This has to be one of the few times I've seen Al really screw up something horribly. He's usually very good at being a technically-savvy politican, and actually isn't stupid (at least, the couple of times he visited us (and I actually got to talk to him!) at the Media Lab). One wonders what Tipper fed him that morning. Or maybe... IT'S A REPUBLICAN PLOT!!!! THAT'S IT!!!

    My personal opinion is that I like Al (though Libby intrigues me) - GWB, Jr isn't my style. Just my opinion though (hey, remember to express yours - VOTE next November)!

    On a side note to the above poster:

    • The internet caught on long before the WWW. I happened to be using it quite nicely way back in '89 for what it was originally intended for: research communication.
    • If you mean "mass-culture acceptance", well, it has to do more with NCSA's Mosaic than the base WWW. The WWW was being used for 3-4 years before Mosaic came along. B-L's stuff is the underpinnings of the WWW, just like IP is the underpinnings of the Internet. The mass-appeal is the interface, not the structure. That's not to say B-L's wasn't crucial to the development of the Internet today. It's all a bunch of Lego blocks - all important, but remove one, and the whole thing falls apart.

    -Erik

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    There are always four sides to every story: your side, their side, the truth, and what really happened.
  30. Sliced Bread Sucks by NYC · · Score: 1

    White bread is just thick toilet paper. I need bread with some kick: nice thick crust. Northern Italian bread or French bread does the trick. Ummmm, I'm getting hungry. Hey! It's almost dinner time.

    --Ivan, weenie NT4 user, Jon Katz hater: bite me!

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    --weenie NT4 user: bite me!
    "Computers are nothing but a perfect illusion of order" -- Iggy Pop
  31. Oh Yah!? Well I REinvented the wheel! by rnturn · · Score: 1

    A buncha times :-)

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    CUR ALLOC 20195.....5804M
  32. Silly putty to stick up your posters? by falser · · Score: 1

    I dunno all these american terms.

  33. Sex is already distributed under the GPL by Mycroft-X · · Score: 1

    Hmmm...wouldn't porn be the equivalent of screenshots?

  34. hi 2 all u slashdot duodz Y0 CHIQZ HERE by Zog · · Score: 1

    you spelled to, you, dudes, yo, chicks, be, for, the, and women wrong...

  35. This is good. by dirty · · Score: 1

    We are seeing real press about Gore lying. I wasn't expecting that to happen. Not that I like his oponents any, maybe we should form a slashdot party.

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  36. Think Free Love, not Free Beer! by vpp · · Score: 1

    not quite... the love(source) would have to be made availble.. but they dont have to have it if they dont want to, most women i know just want the sex(binary).

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    Scott Aaron Bamford (vpp) "We`re giving you the chance to skrew it up in a whole new and exciting way" sab@clara.net
  37. It's nice to see... by grappler · · Score: 1

    these politicians, with their latest batch of jokes about inventing things, effectively admitting that they are useless. They know that none of their kind has ever made such a contribution, and they recognize the absurdity in any statement that says otherwise.

    Just my $0.0000002

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    Vidi, Vici, Veni
  38. You're right about Franklin, of course. by grappler · · Score: 1

    Before the days of career politicians, when the leaders had a more active role in other aspects of society. I guess I just don't even consider him one of their kind, ya know?

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    Vidi, Vici, Veni
  39. What? No way! by webslacker · · Score: 1

    When you start integrating raisins into your sliced bread, I sue. Millions of consumers will be inconvenienced by your "innovation" by having to remove your integrated raisins and putting my superior raisins in.

  40. Patent by Royster · · Score: 1

    Well, I patented First Post! You owe me. Vinnie and Guido will be over in the morning to discuss "licensing terms".

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    I have discovered a truly marvelous sig, unfortunately the sig limit is too small to contain i
  41. Kang is too Arrogant by Doomsayer · · Score: 1

    I'm surprised that Kang would lie to the American people. My conscience therefore directs me to vote for Kodos.

    Kang-- We must go forwards not backwards, sideways not upwards...
    Kodos-- What are you going to do, waste your vote HAHAHa
    Homer-- It's not my my fault Marge, I voted for Kodos

    From the Simpsons episode
    http://www.snpp.com/episodes/4F02.html

  42. How Arrogant by Evro · · Score: 1

    ``During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet.''

    The Internet, originally called ARPANET, dates to 1969, when the Defense Department began funding the project. Gore, then 21, was still eight years away from joining Congress.

    Gore aides say their boss has a rightful claim, having promoted the Internet and government funding for the project while in Congress.


    I figured he would say something like "Oh, I really meant..." but instead his aides are saying he really did invent the internet. No, not in those words, but they said he "has a rightful claim."

    He plainly said, "I took the initiative in creating the internet," implying that he had something to do with the creation of the internet. "Promoting" and getting "government funding" for the project are so far removed from creating the internet that his aides' assertion that he is correct is an insult to the American people.

    I like Gore much more than Dole or Bush, but to come out with an in-your-face lie like this is simply unacceptable. The fact that he stuck with his claim instead of apologizing is really a blow against him.

    Plus, I don't see how any of his "promotion" or "government funding" had anything to do with the internet at all. The internet caught on because of Tim Berners-Lee's wonderful world wide web.

    Truly politics at its worst. I guess next year will be a lesser-of-two-evils campaign for me.

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    rooooar
  43. Think Free Love, not Free Beer! by SeanNi · · Score: 1

    hehe... sorry... just had to say it :-)

    But really, under GPL, the act of charging money for it would be perfectly legal, as long as you always distributed the love (source), not just the sex itself (binaries).

    If anyone else has an alternative take, my eyes and... umm... ears... are open!
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    - Sean

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    It's a fine line between trolling and karma-whoring... and I think I just crossed it.
    - Sean
  44. WRONG! by SeanNi · · Score: 1

    They know that none of their kind has ever made such a contribution

    Wrong, wrong and WRONG!

    ...or I suppose you have never heard of Bejamin Franklin. A very pre-eminent politician who did happen to have a hand in inventing more than a few things!

    Ok... maybe you have to go back a few (hundred) years, but don't make sweeping generalities like the one above. Not all politicians are good for nothing...
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    - Sean

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    It's a fine line between trolling and karma-whoring... and I think I just crossed it.
    - Sean
  45. Constructive idea for my American friends by quax · · Score: 1

    Why not grilling all prospective candidates on their stance on the use of cryptography and lame software patents?

    Then give your vote to whomever has some decent ideas how to deal with those issues.

    Just my 2 cents of wisdom, I can't vote for any of them anyway.

  46. Sex is already distributed under the GPL by Stalke · · Score: 1

    Just look at sex as if it were distributed under the GPL. That would mean that only free, open-source sex is legal, and sex that is charged for would be illegal. Isn't that the case now? But what about porn. I guess maybe because its free between the people who are having it and it is the people who view are charged a fee it must mean that sex is actually under the LGPL. Any legal experts out there?

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  47. Dole's Red Cross Blood Scandel by NotoRand · · Score: 1

    There are rumors of a blood testing scandel which is bound to come out with a Dole presidential campaign. Her management of Red Cross left many enemies and I think her campaign will become quite messy.

  48. i invented something to by hacketti · · Score: 1

    i invented this world

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    - http://www.penguin.nl - if you can't beat them, /join them -
  49. I Patent The Big Bang by Krobotha · · Score: 1

    Well, that'd include most deities

  50. Go Mrs. Dole! by Rombuu · · Score: 1

    How so? Or are you just a mysoginist?

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    DrLunch.com The site that tells you what's for lunch!
  51. Go Mrs. Dole! by Rombuu · · Score: 1

    How so? Or are you just a misogynist?

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    DrLunch.com The site that tells you what's for lunch!
  52. Not BS by thmitch · · Score: 1

    In an interview on CNN Al Gore said "During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet."

    Terry

  53. bio-inventor by pandora · · Score: 1

    Well, I invented Gore, so I guess it was really my fault, I really shouldn't have made him say that.

  54. CmdrTaco Inventions by pandora · · Score: 1

    what for? He probly "invented it"

  55. Yopu -definition- by pandora · · Score: 1

    Might that be some form of farm animal? Intercourse is not advised.

  56. I invented wire by ChrisGoodwin · · Score: 1

    Trent Lott owes me royalties.

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    Pretend there is some witty statement here.