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Dumb Laws
Guyle writes "DumbLaws.com is the most hilarious site I've ever been to. The people who run it went to an amazing amount of trouble to find strange laws from all fifty states in the US, as well as a few other countries. Ever wanted to know where and when you could legally beat your wife, or where you can be fined for not flushing the toilet? Find out for yourself! " This is definitely worth a read. Funny stuff.
I often thought that a lot of the really "off-the wall, is that really a widespread problem?" laws were probably enacted long ago to combat a specific individual.
such as:
Old Joe likes to walk past the front of St. Jude's Methodist Assembly in Peoria at precisely 11:45 each Sunday with an Ice Cream Cone shoved in his pocket for the benefit of the Mayor and his wife as they leave services to go to a late brunch with their friends. No one knows why, and this really irks Mrs. Mayor no end as she thinks that this is some kind of perverted kick for Old Joe who just strolls by there silently grinning with rocky road slowly melting away in his coveralls.
Mayor calls the Sheriff who can't come up with anything to arrest Joe for, he's not a vagrant, he's not loitering, he's not making any obscene gestures or doing anything else illegal, he's just walking along on the public sidewalk with Ice Cream in his drawers.
So the Mayor gets the city council to pass an ordinance that you can't walk on the sidewalk on Sunday with ice cream in your pocket. The Sheriff runs Joe in the next time he does this and the Judge fines him $20 or holds him in the tank overnight to make his point. Joe sees that the joke is over and either backs off or starts chaining wheelbarrows to his front yard tree with a for-sale sign on it.
If you look at the laws in Illinois, you will see one in Park Ridge that you have to park a truck in an enclosed garage. Actually, the oridinance in Mt. Prospect is that a commercial vehicle cannot be parked in a resident's driveway, it has to be in a garage. This ordinance was not the result of hundreds of complaints by enraged citizens that their neighbor who drove a repair truck was parking their truck in the drive next door, this was the result of one village board member's personal fued with his neighbor who happened to work for Sears and drove his service van home every night and parked it in his driveway behind his other two cars blocking the sidewalk.
The oridinance was never enforced. It was put on the books by this wacko trustee who managed to force it trough so he could call the cops on his neighbor when he wanted to.
Perhaps someone could start up a site and research some of those stranger laws and get the stories behind them...
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
In Seattle, Washington, it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon longer than six feet in length.
I wonder if this was made a law before - or after - the guy who decided to march back and forth downtown with a longsword a couple years back got TV coverage.
The point though... You've got to be pretty damn tall to conceal a weapon six feet long.
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If a tree falls on an anonymous coward yelling 'first post' in the forest, does anybody hear?
Hey, that's a great idea.
If a law had to be renewed every 25 years or so, stupid old laws like the ones about firing a gun when coming into town to warn people about motor cars would be dropped.
So much easier than tracking these down and repealing them.
...is a law against pouring hot grits down your pants :)
In a few years, people will look at it and wonder where the heck *that* came from.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I'm a schitzophrenic, and so am I.
And there are a bunch of other 'Dumb Laws' that are perfectly reasonable when you understand the context.
I remember a law about not being able to water your lawn with an automated device during the summer. That's just to make sure people don't set the timer to overwater because the reseviors were low. Many arid climates have similar laws.
Some laws are either dumb, or so antiquated as to be laughable, but some make sense if seen in context.
Here's a law that truly applies to Memphis drivers...
Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and pedestrians.
Always knew there was a reason nobody around here can drive..
"It is illegal to wear hot pink pants after midday Sunday." -- now there's some good legislation!
http://www.dumblaws.com/aust.shtml
Napster-to-go says "Fill and refill your compatible MP3 player", which is a lie. It's not MP3. It's WMA with DRM.
Interrogations Illicit Redundant Comments.
+&x
The Scottish ones are a bit misleading I think. It's legal to trespass in Scotland, cos there's no trespass law. The reason for this is that much of Scotland is made up of large estates, and particularly in the Highlands, many folk live in crofts on those estates. They don't own the land they live on, but pay rent (though it's fairly minimal, and they have special rights to stop the estate owner throwing them off the land). If there was a trespass law, it would mean that there would be very few places you'd be allowed to wander about in the Highlands...there are plenty of other laws to stop people destroying the place...
The "guilty until proven innocent" one refers (I think) to poaching. If you're caught with a salmon, for example, on someone's estate, it's up to you to prove you came by it legally, rather than the other way about....what's more, if you're found guilty, anything you used in the process of poaching the salmon (including that shiny new Range Rover you have parked just down the road) can be confiscated. This is indeed a crappy law.
As for the others, AFAIK if a Scottish law falls into disuse, then it's no longer considered valid legally....maybe some expert can expand on that one...I believe that this is not the case in England.
dylan_-
--
Igor Presnyakov stole my hat
The majority of donkies are too big to fit in a bathtub. If you're a donkey, sleeping in a bathtub is one of the worst things you can do, it gets your back out of shape, your legs tighten up, and it's overall just uncomfortable, making that early-morning hay hauling a real pain in the ass.
It's not a bad law. The air waves are a public resource, as such use of them should serve the public.
If the radio stations played only the top40 songs from the USA, they would be hurting Canadian artists.
And it's not a question of "If it's crap, it doesn't deserve airplay." Canada is a small country and thus people in Canada don't have the huge local market that USA artists do so it's hard to reach the critical mass needed to get onto channels like MTV. It's only a Canadian content law, forcing stations to play some Canadian content, that keeps them from simply doing the easy thing and playing only USA artists.
The law isn't such that 1/5th of your CDs must be from Canadian artists, and 1/5th of your books must be from Canadian authors. Because those things you buy inependently.
Users of public resources, TV and radio stations, are forced to follow these laws because it benefits the Canadian economy by helping local artists and studios.
If you don't like it, buy MTV dance mix CDs and play them in your car.
I'm Sorry for the rash post. How about adding citations in the future? That would REALLY add value to your site. I was telling someone about a law, and she told me I was full of shit. I couldn't contradict her because it was simply your site's word against hers. A citation would clear everything up.
Sig goes here
Read about Onan. Tell me what that says, at least with regards to spilling your seed outside of the vagina. Seems pretty clear to me what it's saying.
The modern interpretation of the story of Onan is that after his brother's death, Onan had obligations to his brother's widow to help her have children. Those children would help her live a modestly comfortable life in that time and those children would inherit his brother's estate. But Onan wanted it for himself and refused to impregnate the woman.
The story is not about masturbation. It is about failing to live up to the obligations that society puts upon you.
I have discovered a truly marvelous sig, unfortunately the sig limit is too small to contain i
I always wondered where they got the venture capital.. :}
No, it's enough that if we do slip on someone's unshovelled sidewalk, we can get medical treatment without needing to sue them.
People who live in glass countries...
In a bombing-prone country, if you leave your luggage unattended you create noise for the bomb squad, which needless to say would rather get busy on the signal.
There is a difference between a dumb law and one hopelessly outdated..
Maybe there is a good reason for keeping a donkey from sleeping in a bathtub and it's just that we don't own donkeys now (the average person) and so don't understand it.
A little history, just a line or two, would put this in context and make it a lot more interesting.
Then there are the good, or just not-bad laws that don't really need to be listed. If there's a practical reason for a law and it doesn't severely infringe on civil rights, it probably isn't interesting enough to bother listing.
The 'dumb laws' are the current ones that are still being enforced but for the wrong reasons. This list contains ones like the six or more women living in one house law.
Having laws sorted in these categories, dumb, outdated, and rational (removed from the site) would IMHO improve it a bit.
You might be able to solicit help from the Alt.folklore.urban people in tracking down some of the more oddball laws (see the AFU article on 'rule of thumb' mentioned earlier.)
Actually, having a section on laws that don't really exist but that most people think exist would be good too... Such as "A common misconception is that you were allowed to beat your wife with a stick not to exceed..." and some citations regarding this.
A site with that is one that I would browse for fun and refer people to, both for humor and to correct their misconceptions.
BTW, Moderators, mark Andy's post up, it's probably the most ontopic one on this thread.
> All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday. (Repealed) In
> Massachusetts (where I live)
>
> Interesting, but what is the point of all men bringnig rifles
> to church?
Security.
Many states in the US back in the wild days recognized that the
Government simply did not have the resources to protect citizens
from criminals and indians ( who they were always starting wars
with ).
So what they did was not just allow people to go around armed but
require each man to be armed and take personal responsibility
for his family. "Over my dead body" was to be taken literally
in cases of raping the daughter for instance.
There is a strong temptation to not bring weapons to the house of
God. Many feel it is almost blasphemy to do so. Everybody
knows this and would rob the bank while all the men were in church
and unarmed.
You get around that kind of problem by giving the solution the
force of law.
--= Isn't it surprising how badly I spell ?
If Quebec is 80% French speaking, then the stores which didn't cater to that population would quickly go out of business.
If they didn't, it shows that the language issue isn't as important as the politicians would have you believe.
This whole distinct society thing is crap. Grow up and quit whining. If everyone around you speaks English, then speak it yourself or at least don't cry when people don't want to speak to you.
Exactly. You understood my point!
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icq:2057699
seumas.com
It's an interesting site, but I think it would be a lot more interesting if they referenced at least some of the laws to the ordinance number or section of state law, etc. What's to stop me from submitting a fake law that says "It is illegal for anyone in Madison WI to not be drunk on a football game day." Of course, you're stupid not to be, but that's a different story.
Like most people I would like to know how the laws started but more importantly I would like to know how you would get caught. Like some people have said that oral sex was illegal at one time, but in order to get caught the cop would have to break into your house, then your bedroom. At which point I would assume the mood would be killed and there would be nothing to catch you doing.
And how on earth are the cops going to know that a donkey is in your bathtub?
If you like dumblaws.com, you'll love:
www.dumbcriminalacts.com/
$1055? Isn't that a lot of money to spend to be able to not pay speeding tickets? (Yes, yes, I know about the "points" possibilities, but you have to consider the principle of it all.)
For more information, click here.
Your everyday /usr/games/fortune has a lot of this crap as well. Quite a number of them are untrue and totally made up. IIRC, there was a guy who purposely made up some of these "laws" and circulated them around long enough to get some into the default fortune list. It is on record somewhere on the net. Go find it. The same applies to this website as well. Many of the so-called "laws" are just bad interpretations of legal speak. Come on, when was the last time you saw a law that said in simple words, "Lollipops are banned"? I know it is meant to be funny and all that, but give me a break. It doesn't take wit to interpret laws in a twisted way, take them out of context and translate into something weird. Go ahead and laugh. But don't spread the word and fool a lot of the naive out there as well. Or add a pinch of salt to go.
Sreeram.
Not all the laws mentioned are stupid:
Rememeber that England has suffered from a prolonged civil war (known as "our little problem with Northern Ireland") with frequent bomb attacks on civilians. These bombs were often left in luggage on stations, airports, department stores and other corwded places.
This law therefore makes perfect sense. I rememeber when I first came to England, I was wodering why there were no luggage boxes on the stations. Such youthful innocence...
God (and the IRA et. al.) willing, this particular war should now be over. Now the poor English can concentrate on the ALF, the anti-capitalism terrorists, and whatever today's new violent fringe group is.
I would have liked the web site to have contained references to the law texts. That would have made it much more trustworthy. How many of the laws mentioned, I woder, are nothing more than urban legends?
Hi!
I used to Live in Missouri. A law on the books until the 70's was that it was legal to shoot a Mormon on site. In Buckner, MO, last I checked about 10 years ago, there was a law on the town's books that it was legal shoot a [black person] after dark in a public place.
And in Kansas, last I checked, you can still have the option of being hanged for capitol offenses.
Oral Sex is illegal? This calls for civil disobedance!!!
Do not wright in this space.
It is against the law for animals to have sex in the city limits.
It is illegal to whistle underwater
It is illegal to whisper "dirty" things in your lover's ear during sex.
Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays.
Hm. I do not see It is illegal to defy the laws of Newtonian physics in here. Someone better get off their donut-fattened legislative ass and rectify that!
While such things are humorous and almost never enforced, you cannot help but feel a little queasy that such stupidity is not only legislated, but law. Orwell's future has been around through much of our past. If you truly think you're a free person in this country, just try using a kernal of corn as bait to fish or taking a bath without a full-length bathing suit on.
To hell with worrying about your rights to burn the American flag or to encrypt your email. In a lot of places, you don't even have the legal right to walk down the sidewalk and knock a snake's head off with a cane.
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icq:2057699
seumas.com
It goes WAYYYY back to the first colony days, when church attendance on Sunday was mandatory, but you had to get there and home again alive too.
A township would be granted based on its families' building a "meeting-house" in a central place. The town I grew up in, Bedford, was carved from surrounding towns' territories because those towns were so large that travel from outlying farms to the church in the town center every Sunday was a hardship.
Things may have started out peaceably in the Massachusetts Bay Colony, but after a while, the original occupants of the area got sufficiently annoyed at the flood of newcomers, and the treatment they got from them, to start pushing back, hard. Plus, not that far away, the French/Indian Wars got underway, with some tribes allying with the French and making forays into English-speaking settlement territories (and vice versa), so travelers in the colony were vulnerable to bullet or arrow. A muzzle-loaded rifle was a burden to carry in addition to food for the all-day church session and travel from and back to one's own farm, but a necessary one.
Yeah, I meant population, not area. But until Moose start buying CDs we won't have much clout in the music industry.
I've seen a lot of maps from the USA where the countries (Mexico and Canada) to either end just aren't there, there's a big hole between Alaska and Washington... Or worse, Alaska is moved down into the water off the Washington shore.
With visual aids like that in schools, it's not hard to understand the problems people can have.
There are some on here that don't really seem that stupid. for instance:
China:
To go to college you must be intelligent.
Italy:
Striking someone with a fist is considered a felony
Singapore:
Cigarettes are illegal at all public places
Austrailia:
The legal age for straight sex is 16, unless the person is is in the care/custody of the older person, in which case it is 18.
Netherlands:
It is semi-legal to smoke pot.
Prostitution is legal but the prostitutes must pay taxes like any other business.
Israel:
If you have been maintaining an illegal radio station for five or more years, the station becomes legal.
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My favorite dumb law, though is this one from Sigapore:
Oral sex is illegal unless it is used as a form of foreplay.
So basicaly, if you give some one oral sex, you're legaly required to have sex with them then? Could you get a woman thrown into jail for not doing it??
I also like this one from Chico CA:
Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine.
ReadThe ReflectionEngine, a cyberpunk style n
I found a couple listed there.
Denmark:
Encrypting data files, owning, distributing etc. of encryption programs and creating such programs for any electronic medias is now against the law in Denmark due to fear for terrorists, left and right wing extremist, fundamentalists and distributors of illegal pornography.
Uxbridge, Ontario. In Canada:
Residents are not allowed to have an Internet connection faster than 56k.
These guys didn't list stupid US national laws though. Oh well
ReadThe ReflectionEngine, a cyberpunk style n
In Kansas City, MO, it is legal to break the speed limit once per year. There are so many laws related to speeding, they might as well make it legal again or clean up the whole mess of laws on the books.
With the help of a lawyer and a total of $1055, I got out of 5 speeding tickets in one year due to things like wording of the ticket, the wording of the law did not state the difference between year and a calendar year, and a few not technicaly defined in city limits.
Now that I look back on these laws, I grew out of my bad habits and have had no traffic violations in several years. I realize that the legal system can really be unfair to many or just a game for a few when it is enforced.
That law is actually a leftover from England around 300 years ago, and is where the expression "Rule of thumb" came from.
I heard that in Kansas its illegal to teach evolution in school...
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We cannot reason ourselves out of our basic irrationality. All we can do is learn the art of being irrational in a reasonable way.
Hm. I do not see It is illegal to defy the laws of Newtonian physics in here. Someone better get off their donut-fattened legislative ass and rectify that!
Actualy, that would be pretty uninforceable.
Newtonian physics is only an aproximation, and broken 100% of the time (Though, for the most part you don't notice unless you're moving at a significant persentace of the speed of light, or if you're looking at geometry smalle enough for quantem effects to be aperant)
ReadThe ReflectionEngine, a cyberpunk style n
I think maybe they just needed some filler or something, but if you read the site there are plenty of "Hey what's wrong with that one" type laws, maybe they should rename the site to www.littleknownlaws.com or something or either take out the legitimate ones, it makes is sound like they are for infant death.
Actualy, those laws limit the speed of actualy 56k modems to 53kbits/sec. This wouldn't stop someone from using wireless ethernet from there office, or getting a t1 line or somthing.
ReadThe ReflectionEngine, a cyberpunk style n
- In the City of Denton, it is illegal to park your horse on the town square after 4PM on Sunday.
- Again, in the City of Denton, dancing on the square in Sunday is prohibited.
- Town of Oak Point says that no plot of land for sale may be smaller than 10 feet by 10 feet.
- City of Lewisville bans advertising signs on telephone poles and inserted into the ground, but laying them on the street is OK.
- In Flower Mound, the cutting of a tree on your property is illegal without a permit.
- In Marshall Creek, you may not have a home that is larger than 1800 square feet (this is interesting, considering the town is only about 200 acres anyway).
Have fun.--------------------
I heard that in Kansas its illegal to teach evolution in school...
Um... then you heard wrong, or you have some sort of reading deficiency. In Kansas it is no longer Required to teach "Macro" evolution, IE species evolving from other ones. It is still required to teach "Micro" evolution, Evolution within a species.
I'm not defending the law, just pointing out what it actually is.
ReadThe ReflectionEngine, a cyberpunk style n
I believe that this law has been changed since then, and it is now even higher. In Canada we call it Canadian content, and it does not have strong support from the people, especially in the west, where we feel that it takes away our freedom to choose what want to listen to or watch on tv. The CRTC, the regulatory body has a great deal of power, and makes it very difficult to get a tv station, even with only Canadian content. This law is dumb, but it is not near as bad as the laws in Quebec, which include the French sign law which require the French on any sign to be larger than the English. This is NOT cultral protection, but persicution of other cultures.
However after being to Quebec, the worst law is the no left turns on red, i did this right in front of a police car, but they were frienly and gave me a warning in perfect english. In my home province of Alberta, the best law is
The difference is that this law would not hold up, but the language and Canadian content laws willDrunk grey squirrels are nasty critters. I've met a couple. Greys are abusive to begin with, but when drunk they're foolhardy too. I had a drunk grey throwing things at me, before jumping on my head, and he would probably have bit me, if I hadn't removed him quickly. He was cursing vociferously in squirrel throughout. Normally, greys do scream and throw things at creatures that enter their territory, but they do not normally attack large predators (which is what humans are, essentially -large, pack-hunting, apes which can run, swim and climb, powerfully built with nasty teeth (an adult male human bite can do lethal damage, on a par with other large predators, it's just our upbringing which restrains us.))
So - if your little borther feeds cider to some squirrels, wiat for them to sober up before trying to go into the garden...
It seeks to address the symptom, and ignores the cause of the problem, like most dumb laws.
Interested in XFMail? New XFMail home page.
Yes - here I am. Andy Powell of the http://www.dumblaws.com site that someone found worthy of posting on slashdot (I was surprised to see dumb laws on slashdot - I read slashdot regularly, and this seemed like a good time for a first post). I'm thrilled to see that people have found dumb laws so interesting. I see that some of you have had a couple objections to the content. For example - the "not so stupid" laws (the crib regulations, English baggage law, Arizona water etc.), and the "must be blatantly fake". I'm with everyone about the baggage and the crib - they don't need to be on the site. The blatantly fake? Well we probably need to research them. I'd guess a few legends have crept in during the past year.
Yes, there are outdated laws on the site. I meant for it to be that way - some of them, I don't know if they are still on the books or not. I found them funny anyhow. Should outdated laws be marked as such? I suppose I hadn't paid much attention to that. I'll try to get it all 'up to par' soon - the site should be undergoing a major overhaul soon, as we've had that same design for over a year. I'd appreciate all the suggestion everyone has - I'll be checking this board, or you can e-mail me directly at comments@dumblaws.com
By the way, this isn't my full time job - and I'm not a lawyer or anything like that. In fact, I'm not even a high school graduate, I'm currently in the tenth grade, so between that *and* the site, things get challenging.
Thanks,
Andy
I and any other Angelinos should be proud to hear this one: :)
"it is illegal to beat your wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent" in Los Angeles.
And people wonder why we have the nation's highest divorce rate
--
"Some people say that I proved if you get a C average, you can end up being successful in life."
I think there is a world market for maybe five personal web logs.
After taking a quick glance at the Swiss section, I (as a swiss national) have the feeling that the research done by the operators of the site has been somewhat sloppy:
Clothes may not be hung to dry on Sunday. You may not wash your car on a Sunday. It is considered an offense to mow your lawn on a Sunday, because it causes too much noise.
These are purely social conventions and not enforced by any law I know of.
It is illegal to flush the toilet after 10 P.M. if you live in an apartment. A man may not relieve himself while standing up, after 10 P.M. If you forget you car-keys inside the car and you leave the car open, you will be punished.
Utter nonsense. Whilst such norms might be part of rental or insurance contracts, they are certainly not part of a national law.
Though it is illegal to produce, store, sell and trade absinth (special alcohol), it is legal to consume it.
This is no longer valid as of Jan 1, when the constitution of 1874 is replaced by the new 1999 revision.
The highest speed allowed on national freeways is 120 km/h
So what? I don't call that dumb.
Maybe I'm a bit too legalistic here... but we Swiss have a reputation to lose in that regard.
This one is confirmed from a former PA Turnpike manager
It is illegal to have sex in a turnpike ticket booth. This is in response to a situation when a female turnpike employee had sex with a truck driver in the booth.
No lie, no legend.
Bruce
Bruce Perens.
Too bad it wasn't part of the Constitution (all of them) that all laws have to have expiration dates - each law has to be thoroughly audited by the appropriate legislature & repassed to maintain its existence.
That situation might be a good incentive for the Congressional Critters(tm?) to keep the laws simple, so they can review them w/in their own lifetimes...
But some of the "dumb laws" seem to be people airing their personal gripes, for example. Sorry, I don't recall the specific locations, but I remember these:
- people pissed off about getting speeding tickets -- "In City, State, you can only go 30 mph downtown".
- people pissed off that they couldn't paint their house purple -- "city legislates acceptable house colors"
- someone pissed off that they have to go to smoke outside -- listed as a dumb law: "In ____, ___, smoking indoors is prohibited".
So I guess there is mayhem anytime a high school has a football game.
It's just something to keep all the lawyers busy.
To prevent procreation, surely. And/or enacted for some fatcat to do this legally.
There is a defante difference between Canadians and Americans, however the culture is very similar. Although i would like to see a drop in the amount of Britney Spears, why not let us choose what music we listen to. The law is there to help canadian musicians, not to protect 'Canadian Culture', but i do not like my freedom to choose being taken away, and i think it sets a bad precident. I agree that these are of great benifit to Canadian artiest, but i do not like having to here Alanis Morriset 12 times a day. Most Canadian radio stations are really good to Canadian artists and would act in good faith with out having to repeat songs, there are 10 times the number of Americans.
As far as the turning on red lights, it is a hard hibit to break, and different from everywhere's else. As for Alberta dirvers, most are awful, we have one of the highest injury rates in Canada, and it's in the cities and major highways, it is so fustrating driving on a road where some jackass is going 10Km below the limit in the passing lane.