Again, I'd like evidence. I've never had such training for an MS Office upgrade, I've never even heard of anyone having training for such an upgrade. Do you have evidence this is widespread, or even happens?
The news was carried in an obituary run by Bloomberg late last night, which was pulled when news of his resurrection came through.
"They don't call it the Jesus Phone for nothing," Jobs laughed with reporters, before eating their tasty, tasty brains.
Jobs' new cyborg arsenal includes wifi, 3G, laser cannons, a flame thrower and a can opener, all running on Mac OS X Robosteve. Bundled applications include an enhanced hypnotic force field based on the one he uses at MacWorld keynotes. "I can't wait to try it on Bill," he said.
Disney, in which Jobs is the single largest shareholder, remained unaffected. "Steve's just working with the way we do things here," said the disembodied computer-hosted soul of Walt Disney, who was decanted to a computer in 1966 to avoid being declared legally dead, so that copyright in his works would never, ever run out.
Training? You must work in some different office to everyone else. No-one gets training in the latest weird shit MS Office pulls. I'd like evidence that such training is widespread, or even happens.
The tech press in general are whores, cheap diseased ones. Blogs like this that aspire to being tech press are even cheaper ones. Previously
whores to print advertisers, now whores to ad-banner trolling.
So
unsubstantiable bullshit is the order of the day, because IT GETS THE
CLICKS.
It's so much nicer dealing with the mainstream press - at least they
can spell "journalism."
Several police forces had advised the IWF concerning the site, swearing their actions had nothing to do with anything in the site about senior policemen or their behaviour.
"The fourth most popular website in the world is an encyclopedia," said IWF Obersturmgruppenwhitehouse Myra Hindley. "What sort of message does that send about the youth of today? They should be using mobile phones, dealing drugs, smoking cracks to 'jazz' music in discos and knifing each other in the streets. God help us if they see record covers!"
Police across the country used sophisticated hammer-detecting equipment to swoop on the homes of rumoured Wikipedophiles. All computers, mobile phones, televisions and any technology more sophisticated than scissors will be confiscated for investigation, and will be returned in due process in twelve to eighteen months when the filthy fucking nonces have been brought to trial, assuming they survive multiple beatings in jail.
"Fuck these filthy fucking fuckers," said Zoe fucking Hilton of the NSPCC. "And give us money, or you're a filthy fucking kiddie fucker yourself. Turd."
"We absolutely won't be adapting the system to discussion of ID cards," said Home Secretary Jacqui Smith. "Nor will MPs raising the issue have their offices or homes raided. Probably."
Virgin Media users had failed to notice any difference, assuming the connection problems were service as normal, and went back to watching the football except for the last ten minutes of the game.
Star Wars fans are to feel the force of the seminal sci-fi films and their iconic soundtracks on stage, screen, television, Game Boy, comic book and Internet in major new releases, which will launch next year.
In Star Wars: Journey To The Bottom Of The Barrel, the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra will play a live score as recreations of scenes from the six films with amusingly-captioned kittens are shown on a cinema screen.
It will not be a traditional musical with actors playing characters from the films, but will feature live narrators, speaking authentic lolcat dialect, as painstakingly reconstructed by linguists.
As well as the destruction of the Death Star (an exploding Wikipedia puzzle globe) and various love scenes between Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala (rendered with the relevant LEGO(tm) figures), there will be several of the epic battle scenes for which Star Wars is famous, featuring Airfix model spacecraft taking on miniature cardboard battleships, as held in the jaws of cute kittens.
"Star Wars holds memories for practically everyone," said George Lucas. "I can't think of anyone who won't be simply thrilled to have those memories lovingly caressed by these reconstructions. They'll be particularly pleased to know that JarJar Binks is back, warning Han that Greedo is about to shoot first."
PHONING IT IN, mid-afternoon - An ambulance service has praised a five-year-old boy after he successfully called 999 to report that his mother had collapsed and was unconscious in their home.
In other news, a pet wears a seatbelt, alleged scientists have yet again discovered a formula for the perfect attractive woman (it apparently involves being short with long legs and large breasts), there's a piece on ancient Roman bikinis, how to make the perfect cup of tea and lots of pictures of sunburnt, drug-addled women in bikini tops at a summer rock festival, including ones that aren't Amy Winehouse.
Crop circles have fallen out of favour in recent years. How the A-levels these days aren't as good as proper A-levels were back in my day, you mark my words, remains a perennial favourite. With pictures of students in bikini tops.
"We're holding out hope of the first skateboarding duck of the season," said one of the few reporters still left in the office. "In the meantime, I'm researching a story about a long, short-breasted, large-legged sunburnt woman in a Roman bikini top making me the perfect cup of tea."
Remember: it's the Watchdog of the Press that protects our democracy.
Don't do it unless you want to take on the job of cleaning the shit out every time you go over there. If you want to visit frequently and they like you visiting frequently, and spending your time fixing their damn computer, fine. But, uh, no.
Yes, it is that basic. I work with adults who use a computer all day every day and think it's a magic box - they quite literally do not understand the concept that it follows a precise idiot sequence of instructions, and that's all it does for everything. When they do realise this, their faces light up like it's a revelation. So yes, please beat this into their heads early.
That number's Microsoft's, and Nvidia noticeably failed to deny it.
I do realise an end user shouldn't expected to care. They expect their hideous shit to just work. And they expect a pony. With stripes. And a propellor.
No, I mean that Microsoft doesn't want to have a non-moving target out there, because they know that when their competitors do that the other term for "non-moving target" is "sitting duck."
Microsoft are very good at competing with actual better products when they have to. It just seems they don't know how to compete with themselves.
A lot of what Microsoft does involves staying a moving target, so competitors are always playing catch-up. XP is a stable target, so Wine can catch up to it (and is doing rather well).
Yes. It helps to keep in mind that Unix was basically invented as the first integrated development environment. Language, editor, compiler, all there on the command line! And Linux came with all the GNU tools you needed to write your own apps. And then later, MacOS X came with the developer tools included for free. Microsoft had to get its tools into order. I'm surprised they hadn't started giving them away earlier, but they did start out as a compiler and interpreter company.
Microsoft compete very well when they need to. They pulled some evil crap to kill Netscape, but it wouldn't have worked if IE4 and then IE5 hadn't been vastly superior web browsers to Netscape 4.
Seriously, I think the 3D desktop in Vista is really a very good idea. It's the way to go for the future. I'm on KDE4 and I'd never voluntarily go back to KDE3. Same in Mac OS X. It's just such a pity they made it so fat and couldn't even get together a slow software version for the older graphics chips, like X11 can.
Backward compatibility is more important for the enterprise than many home users realise. Solaris 10 retains twenty years of backward compatibility on Sparc. And is a pretty good Unix for the present day at the same time. Of course this is easier when you build on a good base like Unix rather than something hacked together by fresh grads to a rough plan by a genius (Dave Cutler).
I've just installed OpenBSD on qemu to test Wine compilation on OpenBSD;-)
OpenBSD is the ultimate bastard test of a virtual machine, because OpenBSD doesn't put up with any questionable crap from software or hardware and will break on bugs rather than leave a possible security hole open. VirtualBox fails because it cuts corners, and the VirtualBox devs admit it but won't fix it because there aren't paying customers demanding it. qemu with kqemu on Linux fails, only pure qemu works for it. VMWare works.
Slashdot Mirror
I'm just waiting for Microsoft to go to Washington for a bailout.
Again, I'd like evidence. I've never had such training for an MS Office upgrade, I've never even heard of anyone having training for such an upgrade. Do you have evidence this is widespread, or even happens?
Steve Jobs, visionary leader of Apple Computer, has died - and come back, better and stronger.
The news was carried in an obituary run by Bloomberg late last night, which was pulled when news of his resurrection came through.
"They don't call it the Jesus Phone for nothing," Jobs laughed with reporters, before eating their tasty, tasty brains.
Jobs' new cyborg arsenal includes wifi, 3G, laser cannons, a flame thrower and a can opener, all running on Mac OS X Robosteve. Bundled applications include an enhanced hypnotic force field based on the one he uses at MacWorld keynotes. "I can't wait to try it on Bill," he said.
Disney, in which Jobs is the single largest shareholder, remained unaffected. "Steve's just working with the way we do things here," said the disembodied computer-hosted soul of Walt Disney, who was decanted to a computer in 1966 to avoid being declared legally dead, so that copyright in his works would never, ever run out.
Working on it!
It's the lack of that ribbon, isn't it.
Training? You must work in some different office to everyone else. No-one gets training in the latest weird shit MS Office pulls. I'd like evidence that such training is widespread, or even happens.
The tech press in general are whores, cheap diseased ones. Blogs like this that aspire to being tech press are even cheaper ones. Previously whores to print advertisers, now whores to ad-banner trolling.
So unsubstantiable bullshit is the order of the day, because IT GETS THE CLICKS.
It's so much nicer dealing with the mainstream press - at least they can spell "journalism."
One future prediction: MSDN discs make excellent scarecrows.
Like the old Usenet .sig: "When I collect two solar masses of AOL discs I will collapse the Sun."
Yes, my phone was melting for two days when it happened ...
If you think I'm ever, ever going to visit America ...
The Internet Watch Foundation, protectors of the British citizenry against uncceptable material on teh intarweb, have declared Wikipedia illegal in the UK.
Several police forces had advised the IWF concerning the site, swearing their actions had nothing to do with anything in the site about senior policemen or their behaviour.
"The fourth most popular website in the world is an encyclopedia," said IWF Obersturmgruppenwhitehouse Myra Hindley. "What sort of message does that send about the youth of today? They should be using mobile phones, dealing drugs, smoking cracks to 'jazz' music in discos and knifing each other in the streets. God help us if they see record covers!"
Police across the country used sophisticated hammer-detecting equipment to swoop on the homes of rumoured Wikipedophiles. All computers, mobile phones, televisions and any technology more sophisticated than scissors will be confiscated for investigation, and will be returned in due process in twelve to eighteen months when the filthy fucking nonces have been brought to trial, assuming they survive multiple beatings in jail.
"Fuck these filthy fucking fuckers," said Zoe fucking Hilton of the NSPCC. "And give us money, or you're a filthy fucking kiddie fucker yourself. Turd."
"We absolutely won't be adapting the system to discussion of ID cards," said Home Secretary Jacqui Smith. "Nor will MPs raising the issue have their offices or homes raided. Probably."
Virgin Media users had failed to notice any difference, assuming the connection problems were service as normal, and went back to watching the football except for the last ten minutes of the game.
Star Wars fans are to feel the force of the seminal sci-fi films and their iconic soundtracks on stage, screen, television, Game Boy, comic book and Internet in major new releases, which will launch next year.
In Star Wars: Journey To The Bottom Of The Barrel , the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra will play a live score as recreations of scenes from the six films with amusingly-captioned kittens are shown on a cinema screen.
It will not be a traditional musical with actors playing characters from the films, but will feature live narrators, speaking authentic lolcat dialect, as painstakingly reconstructed by linguists.
As well as the destruction of the Death Star (an exploding Wikipedia puzzle globe) and various love scenes between Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala (rendered with the relevant LEGO(tm) figures), there will be several of the epic battle scenes for which Star Wars is famous, featuring Airfix model spacecraft taking on miniature cardboard battleships, as held in the jaws of cute kittens.
"Star Wars holds memories for practically everyone," said George Lucas. "I can't think of anyone who won't be simply thrilled to have those memories lovingly caressed by these reconstructions. They'll be particularly pleased to know that JarJar Binks is back, warning Han that Greedo is about to shoot first."
PHONING IT IN, mid-afternoon - An ambulance service has praised a five-year-old boy after he successfully called 999 to report that his mother had collapsed and was unconscious in their home.
In other news, a pet wears a seatbelt, alleged scientists have yet again discovered a formula for the perfect attractive woman (it apparently involves being short with long legs and large breasts), there's a piece on ancient Roman bikinis, how to make the perfect cup of tea and lots of pictures of sunburnt, drug-addled women in bikini tops at a summer rock festival, including ones that aren't Amy Winehouse.
Crop circles have fallen out of favour in recent years. How the A-levels these days aren't as good as proper A-levels were back in my day, you mark my words, remains a perennial favourite. With pictures of students in bikini tops.
"We're holding out hope of the first skateboarding duck of the season," said one of the few reporters still left in the office. "In the meantime, I'm researching a story about a long, short-breasted, large-legged sunburnt woman in a Roman bikini top making me the perfect cup of tea."
Remember: it's the Watchdog of the Press that protects our democracy.
Indeed. Apple reliability will take Apple hardware control.
1. Don't.
2. Really. Just don't.
Don't do it unless you want to take on the job of cleaning the shit out every time you go over there. If you want to visit frequently and they like you visiting frequently, and spending your time fixing their damn computer, fine. But, uh, no.
Note that even Ubuntu isn't immune - I commend to you this story from Liam On Linux.
Yes, it is that basic. I work with adults who use a computer all day every day and think it's a magic box - they quite literally do not understand the concept that it follows a precise idiot sequence of instructions, and that's all it does for everything. When they do realise this, their faces light up like it's a revelation. So yes, please beat this into their heads early.
"Never had a single one on any of my hardware."
That number's Microsoft's, and Nvidia noticeably failed to deny it.
I do realise an end user shouldn't expected to care. They expect their hideous shit to just work. And they expect a pony. With stripes. And a propellor.
No, I mean that Microsoft doesn't want to have a non-moving target out there, because they know that when their competitors do that the other term for "non-moving target" is "sitting duck."
Microsoft are very good at competing with actual better products when they have to. It just seems they don't know how to compete with themselves.
Tilt bits?
A lot of what Microsoft does involves staying a moving target, so competitors are always playing catch-up. XP is a stable target, so Wine can catch up to it (and is doing rather well).
Yes. It helps to keep in mind that Unix was basically invented as the first integrated development environment. Language, editor, compiler, all there on the command line! And Linux came with all the GNU tools you needed to write your own apps. And then later, MacOS X came with the developer tools included for free. Microsoft had to get its tools into order. I'm surprised they hadn't started giving them away earlier, but they did start out as a compiler and interpreter company.
Microsoft compete very well when they need to. They pulled some evil crap to kill Netscape, but it wouldn't have worked if IE4 and then IE5 hadn't been vastly superior web browsers to Netscape 4.
Seriously, I think the 3D desktop in Vista is really a very good idea. It's the way to go for the future. I'm on KDE4 and I'd never voluntarily go back to KDE3. Same in Mac OS X. It's just such a pity they made it so fat and couldn't even get together a slow software version for the older graphics chips, like X11 can.
Backward compatibility is more important for the enterprise than many home users realise. Solaris 10 retains twenty years of backward compatibility on Sparc. And is a pretty good Unix for the present day at the same time. Of course this is easier when you build on a good base like Unix rather than something hacked together by fresh grads to a rough plan by a genius (Dave Cutler).
I've just installed OpenBSD on qemu to test Wine compilation on OpenBSD ;-)
OpenBSD is the ultimate bastard test of a virtual machine, because OpenBSD doesn't put up with any questionable crap from software or hardware and will break on bugs rather than leave a possible security hole open. VirtualBox fails because it cuts corners, and the VirtualBox devs admit it but won't fix it because there aren't paying customers demanding it. qemu with kqemu on Linux fails, only pure qemu works for it. VMWare works.