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User: Max(10)

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  1. What do you do? on Game Distribution Platforms Becoming Annoyingly Common · · Score: 1

    But what happens when you have programs from Valve, Stardock, Activision, 2k Games, Take-Two, Codemasters, Microsoft, Eidos, and Ubisoft?

    You check yourself into a video game addiction clinic.

  2. Duke Nukem Forever on How Do You Measure a Game's Worth? · · Score: 1

    is priceless.

  3. Re:College campuses are full of unusual on What Clown On a Unicycle? · · Score: 1

    > ...a clown isn't that unusual for a college campus.

    Right. The frats, for example, are populated entirely by clowns.

    Right. I'm sure at least 90% of all the sober people there would have noticed Gates McFadden riding a unicycle, now that's something amazing and unexpected!

  4. Re:The disc is DRM on Nintendo Wii To Get Netflix Streaming · · Score: 4, Funny

    But... on the internet, everybody is a dog. Besides, their streaming service is so shitty on the PC that many subscribers of the service still pirate online just because it's easier than trying to convince Silverlight to work.

    And that's the real reason for the disc requirement - piracy. If you take a closer look at the disc you'll notice that it has a jagged edge, but an average person wouldn't normally notice the difference when handling the disc. Now imagine someone reporting you for pirating movies and your little disc spinning at 25,000 rpm then being shot out at 200 mph.. DRM now stands for Decapitation & Radical Maiming.

  5. Forget LAPD, I'm waiting for FEDs on Forget LCDs and LEDs, Here Come LPDs · · Score: 2, Interesting

    FEDs (Field emission displays) are superior to CRTs, LCDs and these new LPDs in every way. FEDs have the same thin 2-4 mm profile as LCDs, but unlike LCDs produce very bright and clear images even in direct sunlight (which is why they were used as HUDs in airplanes) while consuming up to 10 times less power. Sony had a 36" FED prototype that consumed only 14 W, which is 1/8 of what a typical LCD and 1/2 of what an LPD of that size would consume.

  6. The first never-ending MMORPG on Game Endings Going Out of Style? · · Score: 4, Funny

    There is no real 'finish' to most MMORPGs.

    Duke Nukem 3D was one of the last multiplayer games to feature a cool ending. 3D Realms then decided to set a new trend of never-ending MMORPGs with Duke Nukem Forever. Playing other MMORPGs while waiting for the release of Duke Nukem Forever is the first never-ending MMORPG.

  7. Re:RCA on Is RCA's Airnergy Snake Oil? · · Score: 1

    Plus, don't let the RCA brand fool you into thinking this must be from a legitimate company

    Yes, when I am confronted with an RCA TV, the first thing I think is, "a legitimate company produced this."

    Some people are old enough to remember when there was an actual legitimate RCA.

    Now get off my lawn.

    Or you'll whip them with a pair of RCA cables?

    Introducing the all new RCA whoopass whipenergy device! It's not wireless, but it gets your point across time after time after time.
    Brought to you by RCA, the first company in the world to break the 1 Mbps barrier over CAT9 cable.

  8. Re:Already a disappointment on Star Trek Online Open Beta Starts Today · · Score: 1, Insightful

    I'm trying to figure out why people are continually surprised when non-Windows MMO clients are not available. You want to have a high percentage chance of being able to play a non-console, non-browser based game, get a Windows machine. End of story.

    Spoken like a true Microsoft rep. If you expect and demand nothing, that's exactly what you will get. At least 30 million people expect and demand more and refuse to just "get a Windows machine" to be able to play a particular game or use a particular application, which is why more and more applications and games are being released for non-Windows operating systems.

  9. Parrot Parrott on Smartphones Receive Holy Blessing · · Score: 1

    Canon Parrott raised his voice to the heavens to address the Lord God of all Creation. "May our tongues be gentle, our e-mails be simple and our websites be accessible," he said.

    I hope I don't go to hell for this, but Canon Parrott sounds a bit like a parrot.
    May redundancy be gone.

  10. Already a disappointment on Star Trek Online Open Beta Starts Today · · Score: 1, Insightful

    Cryptic live up to their name, I searched their site in vain for this:

    Cryptic has announced that they will release a Windows version of STO, and a possible console version also. During the August 10 Las Vegas conference, Cryptic announced that there would be neither Linux nor Mac versions for the original launch, though they did not rule out the possibility of later port releases.

    They were just trying not to infuriate the Fek'lhr worshiping Linux fans, but the truth is that they will never release a Linux or Mac version of STO. After watching the trailers and finding out that there would be no Linux or Mac versions, Captain Picard decided to share his feelings about STO.

  11. Freaking ninja cryptographers! on Second 3G GSM Cipher Cracked · · Score: 1

    For a nanosecond I was worried that Mugen Tenshin ninja cryptographers had attacked Kasumi!

  12. Prions on New "Wet Computer" To Mimic Neurons In the Brain · · Score: 1

    From TFA:
    "Recent work has shown that when two such lipid layers encounter each other as the cells come into contact, a protein can form a passage between them, allowing chemical signaling molecules to pass. Second, the cells' interiors will play host to what is known as a Belousov-Zhabotinsky or B-Z chemical reaction. Simply put, reactions of this type can be initiated by changing the concentration of the element bromine by a certain threshold amount."

    And then some scientists are shocked to find out that prions can evolve.

  13. Re:Don't do it! on Futuristic Sex Robots Now Just "Sex Robots" · · Score: 2, Funny

    "DON'T DATE ROBOTS!"

    Data, something tells me you have strong feelings about this issue... What has Tasha Yar done to you?
    No, I mean, we want details.

  14. Re:Yes but... on OpenShot Video Editor Reaches Version 1.0 · · Score: 2, Informative

    "Is this one usable, unlike the other ones for linux?"

    IMO, it already features everything that most people will ever need and it seems quite stable, too, but I prefer Kdenlive.

  15. Re:Or, how about... on Why Programmers Need To Learn Statistics · · Score: 1

    "Statisticians need to learn programming or I will kill them all."

    No, please don't, leave at least half a dozen so they can do the statistics on your killing the others and then we'll use the Pearson correlation coefficient on their results to find the most incompetent statistician of the bunch whose future work we'll then use to seed our PRNGs.

  16. Qi Pixel Qi Adam Slate, but coming soon on Tegra 2 Tablets/Slates Impress At CES · · Score: 1

    So when they make a Pixel Qi Adam Slate that can be charged wirelessly, it will be called Qi Pixel Qi Adam Slate? Gee, Pikachu's late, too.

  17. Sir John of MI6 on The Gradual Erosion of the Right To Privacy · · Score: 1

    "Mainly that's because, as an adult, I have an awareness of consequence (having suffered through enough such consequences over the years to have gained an appreciation of the power of my own stupidity.)"

    Sir John, is that you?

  18. It still rocks on Duke Nukem Forever Not Dead? (Yes, This Again) · · Score: 2, Interesting

    "I think the whole world has. Like you said, the main draw of Duke Nukem over similar games was the swearing/stripper angle, and even for today's kids that role was long ago taken by the Internet."

    I actually played Duke Nukem 3D recently on Linux using eduke32 and it was still a lot of fun. Back when Duke Nukem was popular some kids may have played it because of the swearing/stripper angle, but I don't know of any adults who played it just because of that. My friends and I enjoyed playing Duke Nukem so much because it contained a lot of humor and it was also one of the first multiplayer games that worked well and in which you could interact with the environment in a more realistic way. The multiplayer mode was great, 8 of us could play Duke Nukem at the same time in the computer lab and when one of us found something he wanted to share he'd just yell "My view!" and we'd all switch to his view. I may be wrong, but I think that Duke Nukem was the first game to feature the ability to switch to another player's view in multiplayer mode.

  19. Rip 'em a new one on Duke Nukem Forever Not Dead? (Yes, This Again) · · Score: 0

    "No, no, don't be disappointed, read between the lines why am I not allowed to talk about it?"

    Because you know I have a pipebomb and know where to find you?

  20. Re:Car Analogy on Golden Ratio Discovered In a Quantum World · · Score: 1, Interesting

    You get a grant to analyze a car in order to find something really special about it. You measure its top speed, acceleration, etc. and spend 3 years analyzing it, but find nothing special about it, it's an average car. At this point you already spent all the money and you need to somehow justify spending all that time and money, so you start comparing all the measurements you took in order to at least find some kind of well known constant and that's when you notice that the diameter of the AC vent is 1.618 of the diameter of the cigarette lighter.

  21. Re:So everyone will soon look like on Control Your Apps Without Your Finger · · Score: 0, Troll

    Elaine dancing?

    Only when rearranging the desktop icons. Here's a list of the most common gestures:
    - raise arm and perform air-wipe over icon = launch application
    - raise arm all the way up and perform slam-dunk motion = close application in active window
    - perform one finger salute motion = shutdown -p now
    - raise both arms, look up as if asking "Why, God, why?", drop arms and shake head = restart Microsoft Windows after a hard reset

  22. Re:Pronunciation? GESTAPO! on Intel Launches Wi-Di · · Score: 1

    I pronounce HiFi as high fee (high fidelity) and WiFi as wifey (diminutive of wife). It may sound strange to some people, but to me it's logical, HiFi systems used to be very expensive (high fee) and wireless fidelity implies being faithful to one's wife when she's too far to yank one's {wire,USB {keychain,dongle}}.

    I'd probably pronounce WiDi as widey, which sounds a lot like whitey, but I'm tired of these silly acronyms, people keep pronouncing everything their own way anyway and most sales people seem to think that their pronunciation is the only correct one.

    GESTAPO (Gotta Eliminate Silly Technology, Acronyms, People and Organizations)!