I was mildly embarrassed to be dropping off a urine
sample for a 24 hour calcium test, which is a *huge*
jug of piss collected over 24 hours.
Some other guy was trying to hand off
a 'sample' to one of the lab techs.
She said very loudly (for all to hear): "I can't take your semen.
Semen samples can only be accepted between (some time range)
on (some specific days)."
I thought they had more discrete ways of handling
samples like that. It sure made me feel less awkward.
Please use plenty of bleach on those cloth diapers.
While walking in a nearby park, I noticed what looked
like small squares of of artwork hanging on
a chain link fence. At a distance I thought they were
tie dye patterns.
On closer inspection, they were cloth diapers hung
to dry on the fence. The 'patterns' were various layers
of faded shit and piss stains. Ugh.
Maybe you just aren't thinking of the correct punishment.
What about forcing the offenders to wear green Toughskin jeans
that only reach halfway between the knees and ankles?
Emotionally scarring for sure, but the ends justify the means.
Slashdot Mirror
I'm wondering where the samples came from...
My guess is a graduate student, intern, or other disposable meat bag.
Alaska, here I come!
That seems to be working for Ted 'Internet Tubes' Stevens.
That guy is seriously old.
Reminds me of a visit to a medical lab.
I was mildly embarrassed to be dropping off a urine sample for a 24 hour calcium test, which is a *huge* jug of piss collected over 24 hours.
Some other guy was trying to hand off a 'sample' to one of the lab techs.
She said very loudly (for all to hear): "I can't take your semen.
Semen samples can only be accepted between (some time range) on (some specific days)."
I thought they had more discrete ways of handling samples like that. It sure made me feel less awkward.
Please use plenty of bleach on those cloth diapers.
While walking in a nearby park, I noticed what looked
like small squares of of artwork hanging on
a chain link fence. At a distance I thought they were
tie dye patterns.
On closer inspection, they were cloth diapers hung
to dry on the fence. The 'patterns' were various layers
of faded shit and piss stains. Ugh.
You think a crotch full of gas would be fun?
As long as it is not my crotch it could be entertaining.
I think I saw that in Jackass 2.
Choose three.
Not without a Cowboy Neal option.
Maybe a frozen rat humping an ice cube?
(as opposed to a red dog humping a blue beach ball)
You don't believe punishment can change behavior?
Maybe you just aren't thinking of the correct punishment.
What about forcing the offenders to wear green Toughskin jeans
that only reach halfway between the knees and ankles?
Emotionally scarring for sure, but the ends justify the means.
Why do people automatically say that if someone drives a fast, expensive car that they have a small penis?
That is a particularly disturbing generalization if the driver is a woman.
9 years of experience programming with C# and .net who is willing to work for $18,500 per year.
I have 9 years experience at sea, a sharp knife, and a fish net.
But even I won't work for 18.5K per year.
BTW, it's 'post a resume like a pirate' day.
wtf? skin? hurt?
Chafing maybe?
You know, from.. uh.. repetitive movements.
I am off to the ATM down stairs. I could use a little extra cash.
Make sure you smile for the camera :-)
Crabby Prehistoric Man?
Woah, no need for buggy whip! It was just a joke.
Tis not the end of your torment laddie,
the next dawn brings the salty sting of an ITLAPD dupe.
How did CBS get to show them, much less get permission to tart them up?
TV executives and tarts?
I suspect money is the enabler.
Defendant: "I'm innocent, can I go free?"
tap tap tap...
Computer says no.
*cough*
No problem, I'm cooking up a sample right now that
I would be thrilled to give to my boss.
I'll just leave it in his in-box.
When a captain could slap his short skirted
yeoman on the butt and say "Get me some coffee, honey."
When a giant space Lincoln could use words like 'nigress'.
They don't make them like that anymore...
It plays a video of Steve Ballmer doing the
monkey dance to the tune of 'Turkey in the Straw'.
Damn, that is one catchy tune.
I hate people...
I hate people...
I hate people...
I hate people...
Froggy, froggy, all green and bumpy.
Why do you frown and act so grumpy?
Yeah, brother.
[queue groovy Spock harp jam]
Use both laxative and Jalapenos,
and replace the toilet paper in the bathroom with rabid gerbils.
Few things are as painful as wiping your burning anus with a rabid gerbil.
penile/scrotal cupholder just sounds like an STD-spreading device
Sounds like Paris Hilton.
Internet + Lower than expected profits = Piracy
That's worth a Field's medal. Arrr...
i will just be hungry the next day and die a day later than before.
That pretty much sums up the mechanics of life.
That's why I would train the rat to dance, so I could enjoy some entertainment with my remaining days.