"The billennium party at OpenProjects.Net rocked!"
Okay, sound like a wild party with beer and titties so far.
"Check out the log for the whole event over here."
Logs? He meant pictures, or videos, I guess?
**** BEGIN LOGGING AT Sat Sep 8 21:30:01 2001 21:30:01 --> You are now talking on #billennium 21:30:01 --- Topic for #billennium is Who brought the 6e0 packs?:) 21:30:01 --- Topic for #billennium set by robster at Sat Sep 8 20:00:22
[snip...]
WTF? IRC logs, was that your "party" that "rocked"? Gee what kinda fucking braindeath monkey would even think of doing a party over IRC, morons. And why is this posted on Slashdot? Go back to your StarTrek Gay Fest where you belong.
A friend is someone who likes you even though you smell like shit.
A friend is someone who likes you even though you're disgustingly ugly.
A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself.
A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your loser life.
A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really think you should be raped by a mad goat and then thrown to vicious dogs.
A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet and vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English, no sorry that's the cleaning lady.
My name is Billy Evans. I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me, because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is because I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except when I try to breathe. The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on account of us having no money or insurance.
I would like to have a body transplant, but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work because she said nobody hires crying people. I said,"Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap bag. Mommy always gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her sneeze and chafes her real bad.
I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this email to very one you know. Forward it to people you don't know, too. Dr. Johansen said that for every person you forward this email to, Bill Gates will team up with AOL and send a nickel to NASA. With that funding, NASA will collect prayers from school children all over America and have the astronauts take them up into space so that the angels can hear them better.
Then they will come back to earth and go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection in church and send all the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me get better then.
Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Right now I can only be third base. Every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can take more prayers to the angels and my dream will be closer to coming true.
Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body.
I don't want my leaves to rot before I turn 10. If you don't forward this email, that's okay. Mommy says you're a mean and heartless bastard who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only a head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long, slow, horrible death and then burn forever in hell. What kind of cruel person are you that you can't take five freakin' minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can feel guilt and shame about ignoring a poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?
Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish I had a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty that wouldn't chew on me and try to bury its turds in the leaves of my burlap body. I wish that very much.
According to this article a group of Hungarian scientists have found another potential evidence of life
on Goatse.cx. Apparently some groups of dark spots spread every goatian spring. They say this could be caused by
photosynthetic organisms.
With my bare hands. The figlets came from this place and a bit of automagic manipulation to counter fuck the lameness filter in a wink wink nudge nudge sort of way. Search usenet for more shit, that's about it.
Welcome to the club. I broke mine when a homeless hippy in wheelchair jump kicked me with his nubs.
Please tell your friend to fuck off. BBS is died decades ago.
BeOS is antique as well.
"The billennium party at OpenProjects.Net rocked!"
Okay, sound like a wild party with beer and titties so far.
"Check out the log for the whole event over here."
Logs? He meant pictures, or videos, I guess?
**** BEGIN LOGGING AT Sat Sep 8 21:30:01 2001 :)
WTF? IRC logs, was that your "party" that "rocked"? Gee what kinda fucking braindeath monkey would even think of doing a party over IRC, morons. And why is this posted on Slashdot? Go back to your StarTrek Gay Fest where you belong.21:30:01 --> You are now talking on #billennium
21:30:01 --- Topic for #billennium is Who brought the 6e0 packs?
21:30:01 --- Topic for #billennium set by robster at Sat Sep 8 20:00:22
[snip...]
aaaaaannnd.... Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Oh my God! There was this guy and he came over and he was like, "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Oh my God! i went over to my mom and she'd be like, "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
That's so funny. Cause i went home and i said, "Hey Dad, Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Oh my God! And then there was this guy and he goes, "Hey, i gotta knife" And i go, "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Yo, i went up to a thug gangster and he was like, "Yo, motherFucker" "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Yo, i saw Ar-Two-Dee-Two on the street and he was like, "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
"Bleep!"
Yo, i saw this kid in a wheelchair going over a hill really fast "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Yo, i was watching a movie theater and this guy, he was like, "Oh, i got popcorn"
And i was like, "Oh my God... Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
When you're a kid and ya wanna go, "Weee!" But you ain't got drugs yet... You hold out for your life. Hold on to your little gonads... and strife.
Gonads and Strife
Gonads and Strife
Gonads and Strife
Gonads in the lightning!
Gonads in the rain! "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Yo, i saw a squirrell run across the street and he didn't get hit by a car, so he was like, "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
_ _|\__/|
/ o `./
{o__, \ {
/ . . ) \
`-` '-' \ }
'---.~_ _ _|
Gee $5249 for a RealDoll, are you out of yer fucking mind?
Shell out a few bucks to buy a lady a drink or something. It definitely tops humping a stuffed toy.
My name is Billy Evans. I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me, because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is because I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except when I try to breathe. The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on account of us having no money or insurance.
I would like to have a body transplant, but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work because she said nobody hires crying people. I said,"Don't cry, Mommy," and she hugged my burlap bag. Mommy always gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her sneeze and chafes her real bad.
I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this email to very one you know. Forward it to people you don't know, too. Dr. Johansen said that for every person you forward this email to, Bill Gates will team up with AOL and send a nickel to NASA. With that funding, NASA will collect prayers from school children all over America and have the astronauts take them up into space so that the angels can hear them better.
Then they will come back to earth and go to the Pope, and he will take up a collection in church and send all the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me get better then.
Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball. Right now I can only be third base. Every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can take more prayers to the angels and my dream will be closer to coming true.
Please help me. Mommy is so sad, and I want a body.
I don't want my leaves to rot before I turn 10. If you don't forward this email, that's okay. Mommy says you're a mean and heartless bastard who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only a head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long, slow, horrible death and then burn forever in hell. What kind of cruel person are you that you can't take five freakin' minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can feel guilt and shame about ignoring a poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?
Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish I had a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty that wouldn't chew on me and try to bury its turds in the leaves of my burlap body. I wish that very much.
Thank You,
Billy "Smiley" Evans
Shut the fuck up, dildo. ICANN has way more horse power than Slashdot.
Why, thanks! Laden or unladen?
False alert, scientists found out it was organisms on the telescope lens.
I post auto -1 and some moderators on crack are stupid enough to mod me down. Go figure.
You submitted too early. Post at least 3 months after the original story was published and it will get on Slashdot.
According to this article a group of Hungarian scientists have found another potential evidence of life on Goatse.cx. Apparently some groups of dark spots spread every goatian spring. They say this could be caused by photosynthetic organisms.
It's a well known fact that judges read Slashdot, a great source of unbiased news.
I remind you that 1999 is hot news here on Slashdot. They will post this story again 3 more times next year.
Where do I find wood? There's no such thing on Price Watch
Q. How do you make a dead baby float?
A. Take yer foot off of it's head and let it rise to the surface
Q. What is more disgusting than a pile of 100 dead babies?
A. One live one in the middle is eating its way out.
Q. Why do you put babies into blenders feet first?
A. So you can see the expression on their faces.
yyyyyyy yyyyyyy ooooooooooo uuuuuu uuuuuu
y:::::y y:::::y oo:::::::::::oo u::::u u::::u
y:::::y y:::::y o:::::::::::::::ou::::u u::::u
y:::::y y:::::y o:::::ooooo:::::ou::::u u::::u
y:::::y y:::::y o::::o o::::ou::::u u::::u
y:::::y y:::::y o::::o o::::ou::::u u::::u
y:::::y:::::y o::::o o::::ou::::u u::::u
y:::::::::y o::::o o::::ou:::::uuuu:::::u
y:::::::y o:::::ooooo:::::ou:::::::::::::::uu
y:::::y o:::::::::::::::o u:::::::::::::::u
y:::::y oo:::::::::::oo uu::::::::uu:::u
y:::::y ooooooooooo uuuuuuuu uuuu
y:::::y
y:::::y
y:::::y kkkkkkkk
y:::::y k::::::k
yyyyyyy k::::::k
k::::::k
ssssssssss uuuuuu uuuuuu cccccccccccccccc k:::::k kkkkkkk
ss::::::::::s u::::u u::::u cc:::::::::::::::c k:::::k k:::::k
ss:::::::::::::s u::::u u::::u c:::::::::::::::::c k:::::k k:::::k
s::::::ssss:::::su::::u u::::u c:::::::cccccc:::::c k:::::k k:::::k
s:::::s ssssss u::::u u::::u c::::::c ccccccc k::::::k:::::k
s::::::s u::::u u::::u c:::::c k:::::::::::k
s::::::s u::::u u::::u c:::::c k:::::::::::k
ssssss s:::::s u:::::uuuu:::::u c::::::c ccccccc k::::::k:::::k
s:::::ssss::::::su:::::::::::::::uuc:::::::c ccccc:::::ck::::::k k:::::k
s::::::::::::::s u:::::::::::::::u c:::::::::::::::::ck::::::k k:::::k
s:::::::::::ss uu::::::::uu:::u cc:::::::::::::::ck::::::k k:::::k
sssssssssss uuuuuuuu uuuu cccccccccccccccckkkkkkkk kkkkkkk
SHOUT-OUT TO:
JUVENILE, MANNIE FRESH, B6, BIG TYMER$, HOT BOYZ, LUDACRIS, MYSTIKAL, BLACK ROB, OUTKAST, NELLY AND ST. LUNATICS, FOXY BROWN, JUNIOR M.A.F.I.A., EVE, LIL' KIM, FUNKMASTER FLEX, DMX, JA RULE, MISSY ELLIOTT, BUSTA RHYMES, RAMPAGE, SPLIFF STAR, RAH DIGGA, JAY-2, LIL' CEASE, TRICK DADDY, LIL' BOW WOW, MOBB DEEP, DR. DRE, SNOOP DOGG, NOREAGA, CAPONE, NAS, EL-P AND COMPANY FLOW, XZYBIT, M.O.P., SCARFACE, PRODIGY, RAS KASS, DEL THA FUNKEE HOMOSAPIEN, HIEROGLYPHICS IMPERIUM, SOULS OS MYSTCHIEF, THREE 6 MAFIA, CORMEGA, BOOT CAMP CLIK, THE NEPTUNES, LL COOL J, ACEYALONE, FREESTYLE FELLOWSHIP AND PROJECT BLOWED, DILATED PEOPLES, JURASSIC 5, LATYAX, BLACKALICIOUS, Q-TIP AND A TRIBE CALLED QUEST, BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY, DIGABLE PLANETS, MC LYTE, QUEEN LATIFAH, MONIE LOVE, SPECIAL ED, KID CAPRI, JUVENILE, MANNIE FRESH, B6, BIG TYMER$, HOT BOYZ, LUDACRIS, MYSTIKAL, BLACK ROB, OUTKAST, NELLY AND ST. LUNATICS, FOXY BROWN, JUNIOR M.A.F.I.A., EVE, LIL' KIM, FUNKMASTER FLEX, DMX, JA RULE, MISSY ELLIOTT, BUSTA RHYMES, RAMPAGE, SPLIFF STAR, RAH DIGGA, JAY-2, LIL' CEASE, TRICK DADDY, LIL' BOW WOW, MOBB DEEP, DR. DRE, SNOOP DOGG, NOREAGA, CAPONE, NAS, EL-P AND COMPANY FLOW, XZYBIT, M.O.P., SCARFACE, PRODIGY, RAS KASS, DEL THA FUNKEE HOMOSAPIEN, HIEROGLYPHICS IMPERIUM, SOULS OS MYSTCHIEF, THREE 6 MAFIA, CORMEGA, BOOT CAMP CLIK, THE NEPTUNES, LL COOL J, ACEYALONE, FREESTYLE FELLOWSHIP AND PROJECT BLOWED, DILATED PEOPLES, JURASSIC 5, LATYAX, BLACKALICIOUS, Q-TIP AND A TRIBE CALLED QUEST, BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY, DIGABLE PLANETS, MC LYTE, QUEEN LATIFAH, MONIE LOVE, SPECIAL ED, KID CAPRI, JUVENILE, MANNIE FRESH, B6, BIG TYMER$, HOT BOYZ, LUDACRIS, MYSTIKAL, BLACK ROB, OUTKAST, NELLY AND ST. LUNATICS, FOXY BROWN, JUNIOR M.A.F.I.A., EVE, LIL' KIM, FUNKMASTER FLEX, DMX, JA RULE, MISSY ELLIOTT, BUSTA RHYMES, RAMPAGE, SPLIFF STAR, RAH DIGGA, JAY-2, LIL' CEASE, TRICK DADDY, LIL' BOW WOW, MOBB DEEP, DR. DRE, SNOOP DOGG, NOREAGA, CAPONE, NAS, EL-P AND COMPANY FLOW, XZYBIT, M.O.P., SCARFACE, PRODIGY, RAS KASS, DEL THA FUNKEE HOMOSAPIEN, HIEROGLYPHICS IMPERIUM, SOULS OS MYSTCHIEF, THREE 6 MAFIA, CORMEGA, BOOT CAMP CLIK, THE NEPTUNES, LL COOL J, ACEYALONE, FREESTYLE FELLOWSHIP AND PROJECT BLOWED, DILATED PEOPLES, JURASSIC 5, LATYAX, BLACKALICIOUS, Q-TIP AND A TRIBE CALLED QUEST, BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY, DIGABLE PLANETS, MC LYTE, QUEEN LATIFAH, MONIE LOVE, SPECIAL ED, KID CAPRI, JUVENILE, MANNIE FRESH, B6, BIG TYMER$, HOT BOYZ, LUDACRIS, MYSTIKAL, BLACK ROB, OUTKAST, NELLY AND ST. LUNATICS, FOXY BROWN, JUNIOR M.A.F.I.A., EVE, LIL' KIM, FUNKMASTER FLEX, DMX, JA RULE, MISSY ELLIOTT, BUSTA RHYMES, RAMPAGE, SPLIFF STAR, RAH DIGGA, JAY-2, LIL' CEASE, TRICK DADDY, LIL' BOW WOW, MOBB DEEP, DR. DRE, SNOOP DOGG, NOREAGA, CAPONE, NAS, EL-P AND COMPANY FLOW, XZYBIT, M.O.P., SCARFACE, PRODIGY, RAS KASS, DEL THA FUNKEE HOMOSAPIEN, HIEROGLYPHICS IMPERIUM, SOULS OS MYSTCHIEF, THREE 6 MAFIA, CORMEGA, BOOT CAMP CLIK, THE NEPTUNES, LL COOL J, ACEYALONE, FREESTYLE FELLOWSHIP AND PROJECT BLOWED, DILATED PEOPLES, JURASSIC 5, LATYAX, BLACKALICIOUS, Q-TIP AND A TRIBE CALLED QUEST, BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY, DIGABLE PLANETS, MC LYTE, QUEEN LATIFAH, MONIE LOVE, SPECIAL ED, KID CAPRI, JUVENILE, MANNIE FRESH, B6, BIG TYMER$, HOT BOYZ, LUDACRIS, MYSTIKAL, BLACK ROB, OUTKAST, NELLY AND ST. LUNATICS, FOXY BROWN, JUNIOR M.A.F.I.A., EVE, LIL' KIM, FUNKMASTER FLEX, DMX, JA RULE, MISSY ELLIOTT, BUSTA RHYMES, RAMPAGE, SPLIFF STAR, RAH DIGGA, JAY-2, LIL' CEASE, TRICK DADDY, LIL' BOW WOW, MOBB DEEP, DR. DRE, SNOOP DOGG, NOREAGA, CAPONE, NAS, EL-P AND COMPANY FLOW, XZYBIT, M.O.P., SCARFACE, PRODIGY, RAS KASS, DEL THA FUNKEE HOMOSAPIEN, HIEROGLYPHICS IMPERIUM, SOULS OS MYSTCHIEF, THREE 6 MAFIA, CORMEGA, BOOT CAMP CLIK, THE NEPTUNES, LL COOL J, ACEYALONE, FREESTYLE FELLOWSHIP AND PROJECT BLOWED, DILATED PEOPLES, JURASSIC 5, LATYAX, BLACKALICIOUS, Q-TIP AND A TRIBE CALLED QUEST, BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY, DIGABLE PLANETS, MC LYTE, QUEEN LATIFAH, MONIE LOVE, SPECIAL ED, KID CAPRI, AND ALL MY DEAD HOMIEZ
what happen?
DUETOLONGMONITOREXPOSURE.. GOTTA GO TO SLEEP NOW
With my bare hands. The figlets came from this place and a bit of automagic manipulation to counter fuck the lameness filter in a wink wink nudge nudge sort of way. Search usenet for more shit, that's about it.
There IS a place to hide, bro. Will they ever dare to look in there?