So do the other 100 people posting the "ooh! the editors fucked up!" posts.
Really, attacking the slashdot eds' inability to run a site is like attacking a retarded kid's inability to factor primes. You can only expect so much of them, and it's probably best to ignore their mistakes.
But we can't go on. You see, I've found a man with a much larger wang, and I must leave you now. I hope that one day you'll see how a woman like me could never be pleased by a wang as tiny as yours. I will always miss you, and I will always wonder what it would have been like if only you had a bigger wang.
and the metal kids down the street can all get fucked. i've got to get up at four in the god damned morning. if they don't knock that shit off i'm going to head over and drop off a fucking hail of bullets.
Thank you for your +1 Informative post, doctor. I was having trouble forming an opinion on Linux package managers, so I think I'll use yours.
It's people like you that keep me reading and posting to slashdot. You are truly a man among men. I salute you, my good man.
I like how you use your PhD to get what you want. I do the same thing, but with my penis. Once people see my righteous wang, they know I mean business. Like if I can't find the bath towels in Wal-Mart, I just drop my trousers and within a few seconds an employee shows up, ready to answer my question. It appears that great minds think alike.
I have to end this post now, because my tea is done.
Do you ever get the feeling that you're being followed?
Are you not familiar with the book of Revelations of St. John, the final book of the Bible prophesying the Apocalypse? They forced everyone to receive a mark on his right hand or on his forehead so that no one shall be able to buy or sell unless he has the mark, which is the name of the Beast or the number of his name, and the number of the Beast is 6-6-6.
What can such a specific prophecy mean? What is the mark?
Well, the mark is the bar code, the ubiquitous bar code that you'll find on every bog roll and every packet of Johnny's and every poxy pork pie and every bar code is divided into two parts by three markers and those three markers are always represented by the numbers 6-6-6-6!
Now what does it say? No one shall be able to buy or sell without that mark. And now what they're planning to do in order to eradicate all credit card fraud and in order to precipitate a totally cashless society - what they're planning to do, what they've already tested on the American troops - they're gonna subcutaneously laser tattoo that mark onto your right hand or onto your forehead. They're gonna replace plastic with flesh!
FACT!
In the same book of Revelation when the seven seals are broken open on the Day of Judgement, and the seven angels blow their trumpets - when the third angel blows her bugle, wormwood will fall from the sky, wormwood will poison a third part of all the waters and a third part of all the land, and many many many people will die. Now, do you know what the Russian translation for 'wormwood' is?
'Chernobyl'!
FACT!
On August the 18th, 1999, the planets of our solar system are gonna line up into the shape of a cross. They're gonna line up in the fixed signs of Aquarius, Leo, Taurus and Scorpio, which just happen to correspond to the four beasts of the Apocalypse as mentioned in the book of Daniel!
Another FACT!
Do you think that the amoeba ever dreamed that it would evolve into the frog? And when that first frog shimmied out of the water and employed its vocal chords in order to attract a mate or to deter a predator, do you think that that frog ever imagined that that insipient croak would evolve into all the languages of the world, into all the literature of the world? And just as that froggy could never possibly have conceived of Shakespeare so we can never possibly imagine our destiny. Look, if you take the whole of time represented by one year, we're only in the first few moments of the first of January. There's a long way to go. Only now we're not gonna sprout extra limbs and wings and things because evolution itself is evolving. When it comes, the Apocalypse itself will be part of the process of that leap of evolution. By the very definition of Apocalypse mankind will cease to exist, at least in a material form. Well, he'll evolve into something that transcends matter, into a species of pure thought, you with me?
I am a man, a man with four fingers A man with four fingers on my hand I am a man, a man with four fingers But that doesn't coun't my thumb.
I am a man, a man with three fingers A man with three fingers on my hand I am a man, a man with three fingers But that doesn't count my index finger or my thumb.
I am a man, a man with two fingers A man with two fingers on my hand I am a man, a man with two fingers But that doesn't count my middle finger, my index finger, or my thumb.
I am a man, a man with one finger A man with one finger on my hand I am a man, a man with one finger But that doesn't count my ring finger, my middle finger, my index finger, or my thumb.
I am a man, a man with no fingers A man with no fingers on my hand I am a man, a man with no fingers But that doesn't count my pinky or my ring finger, my middle finger, my index finger, or my thumb
--
Sorry to have to do this, but I need to unload some karma. This post is a tribute to The Lyrics Guy.
Lately I've seen red I've killed with words I've wished and hoped and swam through a river of snot twice as wide as the mighty Mississippi, but I wanna know about the commercial An Irish guy walking through a field of green whistling one of those Irish jigs and a woman walks up and says "manly yes, but I like it too." Then the guy pulls out a huge knife and cuts off his first two fingers and somehow catches them in what's left of his left hand and hands them to the woman. Did I mention they are both dressed in green? Then they both sing this song together "Are you icky, are you sticky, are you hot as anything hey cut off two of your fingers and stab yourself in the eye!" then he stabs himself in the eye and hands her the knife and she stabs herself in the eye okay, okay. So what about that? Then they join arms and do this Irish folk dance while taking turns dismembering each other this was a commerical for deoderant I think or soap or somthing now all the body parts are lying in a heap but the heads are still singing "Are you icky, are you sticky, are you hot as anything hey get away from summer and cut off all your limbs!" Then all the body parts start hoppin' and boppin' around like little bunny rats then they jump in the mouths of the singing heads but then they just slip right out of the severed necks and keep boppin' about it's very beautiful music that is playing there's and Irish flute and a mandolin I think and the background singers sound just like the Clancy Brothers it's really a wonderful comercial spectacular it must of cost a fortune to make the kind of commercial you would see during a Super Bowl maybe where the advertising time cost a million dollars a half a minute wow imagine that a million dollars for half a minute anyway by the end it looks like the two of them have been a juicer or a food processor or a blender or somthing it's just a pink puraid of blood bone and flesh in a big bucket but it's still singing somehow are you icky, are you sticky, are you hot as anything hey blend yourself, proccess yourself become a glass of animal juice haven't you had enough of fruit juices and vegtable juices next time company comes over offer them a cool refreshing glass of youself give 'em yourself stop being such a selfish piece of snot, okay? okay, okay. and now back to our program
So then i got a job at pizza hut, but it sucked. I had to anwer the phones and sometimes make pizzas. I usually did a terrible job making the pizzas. They would end up with like a mound of cheese on one side and none on the other. People got pretty pissed off about those pizzas, and about half the time I'd get a call back about it. We'd usually send them another pizza free, but it, like the other pizza, was poorly made. I look back on those salad days with fondness, knowing that I got paid four bucks an hour to make sure that people got bad pizzas.
Slashdot Mirror
Why don't you just buy a Mac?
Oh, that's right. Open source projects don't actually pay money.
Have you ever taken a dump and it's like, pellets? It's lots of round turds instead of the one big stinky I'm used to seeing.
Has this got something to do with my diet? Should I be worried?
Thanks in advance for your replies.
Yes, you do.
So do the other 100 people posting the "ooh! the editors fucked up!" posts.
Really, attacking the slashdot eds' inability to run a site is like attacking a retarded kid's inability to factor primes. You can only expect so much of them, and it's probably best to ignore their mistakes.
If it doens't fit in the sig, it probably shouldn't be a sig.
BenFran sounds like Franklin's username or something.
BenFran console Oct 30 16:07
GeoWash ttyp1 Oct 30 16:00
TedRoos ttyp2 Oct 30 16:05
Silly.
But we can't go on. You see, I've found a man with a much larger wang, and I must leave you now. I hope that one day you'll see how a woman like me could never be pleased by a wang as tiny as yours. I will always miss you, and I will always wonder what it would have been like if only you had a bigger wang.
Jennifer Lewis
How many tubs of Crisco do you think I'll need?
MS .
and the metal kids down the street can all get fucked. i've got to get up at four in the god damned morning. if they don't knock that shit off i'm going to head over and drop off a fucking hail of bullets.
goodnight, slashdot
You made me miss my fp.
Bastard.
Thank you for your +1 Informative post, doctor. I was having trouble forming an opinion on Linux package managers, so I think I'll use yours.
It's people like you that keep me reading and posting to slashdot. You are truly a man among men. I salute you, my good man.
I like how you use your PhD to get what you want. I do the same thing, but with my penis. Once people see my righteous wang, they know I mean business. Like if I can't find the bath towels in Wal-Mart, I just drop my trousers and within a few seconds an employee shows up, ready to answer my question. It appears that great minds think alike.
I have to end this post now, because my tea is done.
Do you ever get the feeling that you're being followed?
Are you not familiar with the book of Revelations of St. John, the final book of the Bible prophesying the Apocalypse? They forced everyone to receive a mark on his right hand or on his forehead so that no one shall be able to buy or sell unless he has the mark, which is the name of the Beast or the number of his name, and the number of the Beast is 6-6-6.
What can such a specific prophecy mean? What is the mark?
Well, the mark is the bar code, the ubiquitous bar code that you'll find on every bog roll and every packet of Johnny's and every poxy pork pie and every bar code is divided into two parts by three markers and those three markers are always represented by the numbers 6-6-6-6!
Now what does it say? No one shall be able to buy or sell without that mark. And now what they're planning to do in order to eradicate all credit card fraud and in order to precipitate a totally cashless society - what they're planning to do, what they've already tested on the American troops - they're gonna subcutaneously laser tattoo that mark onto your right hand or onto your forehead. They're gonna replace plastic with flesh!
FACT!
In the same book of Revelation when the seven seals are broken open on the Day of Judgement, and the seven angels blow their trumpets - when the third angel blows her bugle, wormwood will fall from the sky, wormwood will poison a third part of all the waters and a third part of all the land, and many many many people will die. Now, do you know what the Russian translation for 'wormwood' is?
'Chernobyl'!
FACT!
On August the 18th, 1999, the planets of our solar system are gonna line up into the shape of a cross. They're gonna line up in the fixed signs of Aquarius, Leo, Taurus and Scorpio, which just happen to correspond to the four beasts of the Apocalypse as mentioned in the book of Daniel!
Another FACT!
Do you think that the amoeba ever dreamed that it would evolve into the frog? And when that first frog shimmied out of the water and employed its vocal chords in order to attract a mate or to deter a predator, do you think that that frog ever imagined that that insipient croak would evolve into all the languages of the world, into all the literature of the world? And just as that froggy could never possibly have conceived of Shakespeare so we can never possibly imagine our destiny. Look, if you take the whole of time represented by one year, we're only in the first few moments of the first of January. There's a long way to go. Only now we're not gonna sprout extra limbs and wings and things because evolution itself is evolving. When it comes, the Apocalypse itself will be part of the process of that leap of evolution. By the very definition of Apocalypse mankind will cease to exist, at least in a material form. Well, he'll evolve into something that transcends matter, into a species of pure thought, you with me?
From Negativland's A Big 10-8 Place
I am a man, a man with four fingers
A man with four fingers on my hand
I am a man, a man with four fingers
But that doesn't coun't my thumb.
I am a man, a man with three fingers
A man with three fingers on my hand
I am a man, a man with three fingers
But that doesn't count my index finger or my thumb.
I am a man, a man with two fingers
A man with two fingers on my hand
I am a man, a man with two fingers
But that doesn't count my middle finger, my index finger, or my thumb.
I am a man, a man with one finger
A man with one finger on my hand
I am a man, a man with one finger
But that doesn't count my ring finger, my middle finger, my index finger, or my thumb.
I am a man, a man with no fingers
A man with no fingers on my hand
I am a man, a man with no fingers
But that doesn't count my pinky or my ring finger, my middle finger, my index finger, or my thumb
--
Sorry to have to do this, but I need to unload some karma.
This post is a tribute to The Lyrics Guy.
I am a troll. Please stop modding my comments up.
I like them at -1, Unmoderatable. I appreciate that you appreciate my comments, but I don't need your stinking karma. It makes me very unhappy.
plsfxkthx.
Your lord and saviour,
SweetAndSourJesus
or are people who use the word "paradigm" almost always talking out their ass.
Maybe it's just me.
I'm tired as hell and I don't want to be at work and all that beer is really churning my bowels this morning.
Ugh.
I call it "STROKING an ERECT PENIS until STUFF comes out, too.
Man, I'm bored.
I've got plenty of things I could be doing, but I'm not doing them.
Don't you hate that?
An article on batteries? Seriously, how boring is that?
There's something seriously wrong with software when people are saying "sure, it crashes a lot and takes forever to load, but fsck m$ doodz!"
Seriously.
I'm on slashdot!
Go me!
I love you for 20 seconds!
saturday night post
i feel like such a loser
i never get laid
I just need like an eighth.
Kindbuds only, schwag dealers need not apply.
Lately I've seen red
I've killed with words
I've wished and hoped
and swam through a river of snot
twice as wide as the mighty
Mississippi,
but I wanna know about the commercial
An Irish guy walking through a field of green
whistling one of those Irish jigs
and a woman walks up and says
"manly yes, but I like it too."
Then the guy pulls out a huge knife
and cuts off his first two fingers
and somehow catches them in what's
left of his left hand
and hands them to the woman.
Did I mention they are both dressed in green?
Then they both sing this song together
"Are you icky, are you sticky, are you hot as anything
hey cut off two of your fingers and stab yourself in the eye!"
then he stabs himself in the eye and hands her the knife
and she stabs herself in the eye okay, okay.
So what about that?
Then they join arms and do this Irish folk dance
while taking turns dismembering each other
this was a commerical for deoderant I think
or soap or somthing
now all the body parts are lying in a heap
but the heads are still singing
"Are you icky, are you sticky, are you hot as anything
hey get away from summer and cut off all your limbs!"
Then all the body parts start hoppin' and boppin' around
like little bunny rats
then they jump in the mouths of the singing heads
but then they just slip right out of the severed necks
and keep boppin' about
it's very beautiful music that is playing
there's and Irish flute and a mandolin I think
and the background singers sound just like the Clancy Brothers
it's really a wonderful comercial
spectacular
it must of cost a fortune to make
the kind of commercial you would see during a Super Bowl maybe
where the advertising time cost a million dollars
a half a minute
wow imagine that
a million dollars for half a minute
anyway by the end it looks like the two of them have been
a juicer or a food processor or a blender or somthing
it's just a pink puraid of blood bone and flesh in a big bucket
but it's still singing somehow
are you icky, are you sticky, are you hot as anything
hey blend yourself, proccess yourself
become a glass of animal juice
haven't you had enough of fruit juices and vegtable juices
next time company comes over offer them a cool refreshing glass
of youself
give 'em yourself
stop being such a selfish piece of snot, okay?
okay, okay.
and now back to our program
So then i got a job at pizza hut, but it sucked. I had to anwer the phones and sometimes make pizzas. I usually did a terrible job making the pizzas. They would end up with like a mound of cheese on one side and none on the other. People got pretty pissed off about those pizzas, and about half the time I'd get a call back about it. We'd usually send them another pizza free, but it, like the other pizza, was poorly made. I look back on those salad days with fondness, knowing that I got paid four bucks an hour to make sure that people got bad pizzas.
carry on, carry on
Would have been closer to FP, butI had to wait for IE to load.
Fuck you, microsoft.