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User: User+956

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  1. it's all i got on Consumers Starting To Realize Gadgets Can Be Fixed · · Score: 5, Funny

    From the article: 'Most other gadgets come with batteries that are easy to replace without custom tools.

    When i'm working on a piece of electronic equipment and I see "custom tools", my brain responds with "hammer". But then, that might be part of the problem in the first place.

  2. so i can protect you on Why the US Consumer Doesn't Deserve A Decent Robot · · Score: 3, Funny

    PC Magazine has up a lengthy look at how differing cultural approaches and expectations for robots are setting the stage for Amercian consumers to miss out on the best robots have to offer.

    Look, they have stairs in their houses, and we have stairs in our houses. What's so hard about this?

  3. clever wording on Bill to Require Open Access to Scientific Papers · · Score: 1

    Bill to Require Open Access to Scientific Papers

    Oh, they'll give you free access to all the papers you want. But nobody said anything about charging for the ink.

  4. reverse psychology on Students In UK Tracked With RFID Chips · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think this is a very responsible use of "human monitoring". Its voluntary, its in there CLOTHES, and its only useful at school.

    Yeah, but when you start requiring specific clothes, all you're going to do is entice the teenagers to get naked. You don't want to have naked teenagers on your hands, do you? I know I would. I mean, wouldn't. Right.

  5. government logic on Students In UK Tracked With RFID Chips · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Ten kids in a pilot program in the Hungerhill School in Edenthorpe, England will participate in a program that puts RFID chips in students' uniforms to keep track of their whereabouts.

    Clearly, this measure is needed, as the government doesn't yet have enough cameras to track everyone individually.

  6. yes, and..... on 38% of Downloaders Paid For Radiohead Album · · Score: 3, Interesting

    ...And with all the free publicity, EMI (their old label) has decided to cash in-- selling their back catalog on a USB drive that retails for TWICE what the CD box set costs.

    That pretty much explains the music "industry" in a nutshell.

  7. i hate to sound like a pessimist... on REAL ID In Its Death Throes, Says ACLU · · Score: 4, Insightful

    The rights organization believes that REAL ID is doomed.

    Yeah, but they'll just do what they did with CARNIVORE. Wait a few months, change the name, and go about their plans as usual.

  8. obvious on Ultracapacitors Soon to Replace Many Batteries? · · Score: 3, Funny

    Some researchers expect to soon create capacitors capable of storing 50% as much energy as a lithium ion battery of the same size

    Yes, but are they as incendiary as a SONY battery of the same size?

  9. i learned it from dick cheney on First RIAA Case Victim Finally Speaks Out · · Score: 1, Insightful

    my attorney filed a motion to have the verdict thrown out or to have the judgment reduced based on the constitutionality of the judgment.

    That would be true, except that in this country the constitution is not so much a law, as it is a theory.

  10. nothing can stop it on CNet Tracks the History of the Digital Camera · · Score: 4, Funny

    The resulting camera, pictured above on its first trip to Europe recently, was the size of a large toaster and weighed nearly 4kg. Black-and-white images were captured on a digital cassette tape, and viewing them required Sasson and his colleagues to develop a special screen.

    Even if those conditions were the norm today, I guarantee you, pr0n would still be widely available in that format. and it would be completely awesome.

  11. is it warm in here? on Volcanoes May Have Caused Mass Extinctions? · · Score: 4, Funny

    The Deccan volcanism was a long cumulative process that released vast amounts of greenhouse gases into the atmosphere.

    Yeah, but with our advanced technology, we can cut that time in half.

  12. all the fun stuff on Anti-Terrorism and the Death of the Chemistry Set · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Those that remain are shallow boring versions of the old kits.

    What, no more ammonium nitrate, sodium pellets, and hunks of magnesium? Ah well, there's always mail-order.

  13. you could make it a flowchart on Why Everyone Should Hate Cellphone Carriers · · Score: 5, Funny

    In a world where worse things happen all the time amid the muck and despair of human existence, having to pay for premium text is hardly worth worrying about, is it?

    That depends. Are you paris hilton? If yes, then yes.

  14. nothing new... on Germany Seeks Expansion of Computer Spying · · Score: 4, Funny

    Germany is seeking authority to plant secret Trojan viruses into the computers of suspects that could scan files, photos, diagrams and voice recordings, record every keystroke typed

    We already have something like that in America. It's called Geek Squad.

  15. Also, Duncan Hill Coffee on Intel in the GHz Game Again - Skulltrail Hits 5 GHz · · Score: 4, Funny

    Everything that TG Daily describes sounds like Skulltrail PCs will be very limited in availability and insanely expensive.

    Obviously, it's the only architecture hand-designed by Dethklok.

  16. unrealistic goals on Privacy Groups Mull 'Do Not Track' List for Internet · · Score: 4, Funny

    Rather than burying privacy policies in fine print, companies should also disclose them more fully and provide easier ways to opt out, the groups said.

    Also, they want world peace, and a pony.

  17. what? on Vinyl To Signal the End for CDs? · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Another reason for vinyl's sonic superiority is that no matter how high a sampling rate is, it can never contain all of the data present in an analog groove

    Never? Really? Never? This is a technology website, and you're using the word "Never"??

  18. d'oh on Origin of Cosmic Rays Confirmed · · Score: 4, Funny

    research that seems to confirm and support current theories of how cosmic rays are created.

    Oh, great, now that everyone knows how to make them, the Fantastic Four are going to be up to their eyeballs in supervillainry.

  19. it's not a truck on Senators Call For Hearing On Carrier Content Blocking · · Score: 5, Funny

    Comcast will probably want to come up with some new talking points as their old ones were leaked.

    Well, leaks happen when your whole infrastructure is nothing but a series of tubes.

  20. captain obvious on Using Old Medications to Defeat Tuberculosis · · Score: 4, Funny

    those efforts could take years to bear fruit.

    I don't think fruit is going to help against tuberculosis.

  21. also, find sarah connor on NASA Ikhana Assists SoCal Firefighters · · Score: 1

    Wednesday, Ikhana (a NASA drone) took off from Edwards Air Force Base for a 10 hour mission to observe forest fires in California

    So, when do we get a NASA drone that will terminate forest fires in California?

  22. solution on $2 Million on the Table for DARPA Urban Challenge · · Score: 5, Insightful

    DARPA says its third-annual Urban Challenge program has the lofty goal of developing technology that will keep soldiers off the battlefield and out of harm's way.

    We already have that. It's called congress. It's just broken right now.

  23. what department is that in? on Looking for gPhone Clues in Google Patents · · Score: 4, Funny

    according to Google patent scrutinizer Stephen Arnold.

    Is that an actual job title these days, or is that just his hobby?

  24. GREAT TRANSACTION on eBay's Lobbying Efforts May Include the CIA · · Score: 5, Funny

    The Washington Post reports that eBay was among eight entities that lobbied the CIA during the first six months of 2007

    A+++++++++ WOULD DEFINITELY COLLUDE WITH AGAIN

  25. it's funny because it's true on Hundreds of Black Holes Found · · Score: 4, Funny

    'The findings are also the first direct evidence that most, if not all, massive galaxies in the distant universe spent their youths building monstrous black holes at their cores.

    That's funny, because I've heard the same thing about Dick Cheney.