Slashdot Mirror


User: HarveyBirdman

HarveyBirdman's activity in the archive.

Stories
0
Comments
1,390
First seen
Last seen
Profile
(view on slashdot.org)

Comments · 1,390

  1. Louder-who? on The Ten Worst Products of the Year · · Score: 1
    Have a GigaHappy holiday

    Who listens to the words of someone who uses a phrase like that? I mean, damn, that line alone is a shooting offense in parts of Texas, Oklahoma and Greater Antilles.

  2. Re:Documentation? on Legal Rights for Computers · · Score: 1
    I wouldn't call it mental illness, but it does take a willful blindness to facts and logic, the same sort of thing we see in creationists.

    And that's a form of delusional mental impairment, especially when combined with the persecution fantasies as you call them. I think some of these kids have had nothing but ideological manure stuffed into their heads (from parents, teachers, media "artists") for most of their formative years. I'm not sure ANY amount of mental therapy would help.

    It's actually made ME think about moving to another country. Not because of what the government is doing, but because there is a generation coming up that is composed of ignorant lunatics. It reminds me of a Matt Groenig "Life In Hell" comic where a bunch of kids were asked what they want to be when they grow up. The last panel was little Bongo saying, "I don't want to be here when the rest of them are grown up."

    But then I'm just an Gestapo agent according to the previous oh-so-oppressed poster, so what do I know? Oh well. ;-)

  3. Re:Documentation? on Legal Rights for Computers · · Score: 1
    And yes, the United States may really be one of the most hideous and oppresive societies to exist.

    You really shouldn't go off your meds. The above statement is the result of one of two things: mental illness or thermonuclear fuckheadedness.

    As your counsel, I advise the insanity plea.

  4. Re:Documentation? on Legal Rights for Computers · · Score: 1, Offtopic
    Could you kindly document this assertion?

    Dude. Don't bother. You're dealing with wannabe freedom fighters who don't even know what to do with the freedoms they already have. There's young folk in this country right now who think we are worse than Nazi Germany. It's a bizarre segment of our society. I think they look at past civil rights struggles with a romantic tint, and they want something similar, so they fabricate this wacky worldview where United States 2005 is one of the most hideous, evil and oppressive societies to ever exist. It's pathetic, but what can you do? They're mentally ill.

  5. I'm sorry on Legal Rights for Computers · · Score: 1
    but this is just dumb.

    The day we grant legal rights to machines is the death of *human* rights. Time to take down the flag, shut off the lights, and move to a more rational continuum.

  6. I know why this problem exists on FCC Indecency Rules Don't Apply to Satellite Radio · · Score: 2, Insightful
    Here is the source of the problem: idiots.

    On both sides.

    On one side are those who would just make every other word in a script a four letter one. South Park did a great parody of this in their "shit" episode. It started as one network show saying the word "shit" once, to an episode of Drew Carrey where people just yammered "Shit shit shitty shitter shit shit..."

    And on the other side there's the people whose heads explode if someone uses the word "hell" even in an academic context, or the letters c, o, n, d, o and m are used in close proximity to one another.

    So you have to find some balance. It seemed like we had it for a long time. I'm not entirely sure what happened to make it all start resonating.

    You don't don't want to censor to the point where only two year olds are served by the airwaves, and you don't want zero restraint that allows the airwaves to degrade into a river of shit. Neither state serves the public interest. Both cases are catering to a lowest common denominator, albeit different types- idiots who are idiots because they are 2 years old, or idiots who are idiots because they are dumbfuck asshats.

    The solution is to kill more people.

  7. Re:pornography and satellite TV on FCC Indecency Rules Don't Apply to Satellite Radio · · Score: 2, Informative

    A couple of the DirecTV pr0n channels- The Hot Network and Spice Platinum- show a lot of EU porn.

  8. Re:WTF!?! this is totally stupid on FCC Indecency Rules Don't Apply to Satellite Radio · · Score: 5, Insightful
    otherwise what is the fucking point of the FCC?

    Spectrum management. Period.

  9. Let's make up statistics! on Astronaut: 'Single-Planet Species Don't Last' · · Score: 1
    Or as they call them in Arkansas, sah-teestics.

    There is a 1 in 3500 chance of the Earth being invaded by blue, puffy aliens who are defeated when someone realizes you can pop them with a lit cigarette. The final alien holdouts are in the unfortunate areas that banned smoking.

    The stars predict a 1 in 579 chance of George Clinton becoming President Of The United States because people think he's Bill Clinton running again. George declares the United States a "Funkadelic Zone".

    My sources say there is a 2 in 2111 chance that a revolt against reality television will, somehow, lead to Paris Hilton being elected pope, and France becoming a rabid hyperfundamentalist Islamofascist dictatorship. The pedophilia problem in the Catholic church will worsen, but the official attitude of France toward the USA will remain pretty much the same.

    I prestidigitate a 1 in 4567 chance that the Apocalypse will occur in the next 10 years, and the Anti-Christ will be revealed to be an unholy soul-sharing triumverate of Eddie Vetter, Al Franken and Condoleeza Rice.

    Scientific projections indicate a 1 in 1 chance that supersymmetric superstring theory will unify the forces of nature and prove, once and for all, that the true color of humanity is seventeen shades of suck. A despondent mankind will actually send a mission into space to redirect an ELE asteroid TOWARD the Earth.

  10. Re:Books? No -- I want a glass cutting laser watch on Secret Agents Hold Code-Breaking Contest · · Score: 1
    Screw that. If a bunch of secret agents are running a contest, I expect to win at least a friggin' mini-missile launching pen or some C4 toothpaste w/ detonator toothbrush.

    Pfft! Keep your toys. I want to win the date with a sexy Russian agent.

    Hey, I spent my formative years with James Bond films. I know how to show a sexy Russian agents a good time as long as she doesn't mind if the Aston Martin is a rental.

  11. I am not a mama's boy! on Secret Agents Hold Code-Breaking Contest · · Score: 2, Interesting
    But I must give this to me mum. She solves the simple daily cryptogram puzzle in the paper in her head. She startes at it for a minute, and, boom, she just has the decrypted version. I always told her she would have made a good spook.

    She did work in the aerospace industry before retiring, though. Hmm...

    Another good thing about the article was I didn't know Singh had a new book coming out. Cool. I keep "The Code Book" here at work and it's been beaten up through many borrowings by coworkers.

  12. Huh? on Secret Agents Hold Code-Breaking Contest · · Score: 2, Insightful
    even if you're not brave enough to actually send in an entry."

    What's brave got to do with it? Is this more tinfoilhatism? I think it's a fun idea.

  13. Re:gah! on Le Guin Peeved About Earthsea Miniseries · · Score: 1
    I don't understand why it's so hard to get decent actors. I go to my local playhouse several times a year. I see dozens of people in these plays who do it just for kicks (they have "real" jobs outside of the plays), and most are an order of magnitude or more better actors than a lot of what I see on television, especially in these made for teevee movies and miniseries.

    I think one problem is the need for known actors by the viewers. A friend of mine dated a woman who simply would not go see a movie if it didn't have some big name star in it that she liked. I fear a lot of people are like that. Mention a new movie to most people, and they ask "Who's in it?"

  14. Niven on Le Guin Peeved About Earthsea Miniseries · · Score: 1
    I believe Ringworld has entered production.

    If I were a Hollywood insider, I'd pitch a Man/Kzin Wars *series* to HBO so we could go completely nuts. Do the tales in the books, but hire decent SF authors to do more, maybe about 4 seasons.

    Oh, what you could do these days with a fight between a Kzinti and the human soldiers trained specifically to battle Kzin in hand to hand combat. What were they called? I forget. They had a special tattoo on their foreheads. Why do I remember this stuff?

  15. I think it's a simple meme on Yahoo Video Search Beta · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Well, the story *I* heard was that someone, somewhere (it's usually described as a pre-WWW Usenet post- probably written on a papyrus scroll) typed it that way accidently, a few people on the same thread copied it, and it sort of took off from there. That's my preferred theory, anyway, as I like memetics.

  16. Porn? on Yahoo Video Search Beta · · Score: 3, Funny

    What's porn? Did you mistype pr0n?

  17. Video search BETA? on Yahoo Video Search Beta · · Score: 5, Funny

    Will I be able to search VHS videos soon?

  18. "portrait-style photographs" on USPS Service Kiosks Taking Pictures of Customers · · Score: 1

    Are they nice portraits? Soft focus and candlelight? Can I get a couple 8x10's with me in my sexiest lingerie? Can they remove the mole near my [WORD DELETED BY THE FCC]? Oh, I feel all a twitter!

  19. Fence sitters will be executed! on USPS Service Kiosks Taking Pictures of Customers · · Score: 2, Funny

    Stand at attention, maggot!

    On one hand, I value my privacy, and I dislike such intrusions.

    Oh, we know what's in your hand, boo-boo, when you're in private. No need to clarify, Sparky. Now get on those knees and give me twenty!

    It's a complicated issue with no simple answers.

    Hah! Typical! We can't ba having this sort of mamby-pamby, nancy-boy, wibbly-wobbly, clap-trap, hoo-hah here, toots! Youse either for it or agains'it. This is Slashdot! Global repository of supergeniuses like "gamerdood69" and "spoogloriousspoo193" and "wileycoyoteesq"! No mistakes are made here! You will bow to the monochromatic wisdom!

    So get your wet panties out of their twist, girlie, and pick your side.

  20. The responses so far on U.S. Makes Plans for GPS Shutdown · · Score: 2, Funny
    • "Let me see if I understand this" followed by complete and total misunderstanding. 2,581
    • "I hate the government!" 1,867
    • People who would hate Bush even if he singlehandedly created workable fusion power, nanotech sexbots and everlasting gobstoppers in a single afternoon of intense activity. 1,120
    • Unfocused hysteria. 987
    • Focused idiocy. 619
    • Posts explaining what the article actually said modded down as Trolls. 599
    • Uninformed kneejerk reactions. 583
    • Actually insightful, and not just dumbasses modding up their fellow dumbasses. 42
    • Yet another snotty, holier than thou Birdman analysis. 1
  21. Re:Mental note... on FCC to Allow Wireless Access on Planes · · Score: 1
    Pack cellphone jammer in carryon bag next time I fly...

    ...right to Guantanamo. Sheesh!

  22. Re:X-Play! on Editorial: On the SpikeTV Video Game Awards · · Score: 1

    Anime Unleashed is good. Serial Experiment Lain and Last Exile were great. I went out and bought the DVDs of both of those. ALthough now that I'm on Netflix, I can do all my anime previews with them, but AU is still a good show. They do seem to get some decent stuff now and then. Oh, and that inventors show is good.

  23. Re:X-Play! on Editorial: On the SpikeTV Video Game Awards · · Score: 1

    Oh, I dunno... After some growing pains in the first few weeks of "X-Play", I think they've recaptured the old humor that clicks with me. And Sessler used to have a cohost in the old days. I forget her name. She was an odd looking redhead that turned me on for some reason. Anyway, I still dig the show. The visit to the auction this week was really good.

  24. X-Play! on Editorial: On the SpikeTV Video Game Awards · · Score: 2, Funny
    Yeah. Give me a ketchup-splattered, katana-weilding Morgan Webb in a "Kill Bill" satire over some pointless parade of dumbass whores any day of the week, Pedro. Listening to Howard Stern give simple IQ tests to these stripper types over the years has actually turned me off to women like that. Seriously, some of them can't answer the question, "Who is the President right now."

    And Adam Sessler may get goofy, but it's a self-referential type of goofiness that's funny. The best part of X-Play is that they spend the whole review showing extensive and varied game footage. No one else does that.

  25. Re:Are you Serious on Editorial: On the SpikeTV Video Game Awards · · Score: 1
    And by the way, exactly what is wrong with scantily clad females?

    It's like Fry said in Futurama. The Internet has made me bored of pronography. At any moment I can turn on my computer and 30" Cinema Display and see all the unclothed, orgasming, cum-splattered women my poor eyes can handle. It's just no big deal anymore, so I'd rather non-pr0n things just stick to the topic at hand rather than toss herpes-laden bitch-whores on top of everything as some sort of icing.