As the legal representatives of the Perfume Industrial Trade Association (PITA), we hereby order you to cease and desist from reproducing the scent of one of our represented products, specifically, "Putrid". We have determined that your sweat glands contain the same olfactory composition as "Putrid", which is copyrighted in the U.S. the E.U., China, Japan, and Hell and its environs (incl. Detroit). Pursuant to this order, you are hereby enjoined to:
Prevent raising your arms such as to expose your armpits and thus release the copyrighted odors;
Change your underwear at least once per day so that the copyrighted odors are not emitted;
Wash thoroughly on a regular basis with soap sufficient to remove or mask the copyrighted odors
To ensure compliance with this order, a PITA representative will on a weekly basis inspect your domicile, your motor vehicle, your place of business, and any locations you frequent to detect any olfactory residue that might allow the transmission of copyrighted odors.
PITA reminds you that without stern enforcement of copyright law, the public would not be able to enjoy the fruits of the research laboratories of the perfume industry, including such products as "Putrid", "Rancid", "Nauseating", and "Ecch!".
In a surprise move today, Google announced the launch of GEvil, the second portal devoted to all things mean, nasty, and underhanded, the first of course being the website of the Republican Party.
CEO Eric Schmidt said that "There's a lot of evil in the world already, but we feel that by bringing our first-class infrastructure and youthful energy to bear, we can take evil to new depths. Soon, there will be no escape from evil - we will make it available everywhere.
Asked how the move fits in with the company's motto, "Don't Be Evil", Schmidt replied, "See, that's the beauty of it right there. In truth, we've been evil all along, and our deceptive motto is itself a form of evil. Our researchers and engineers refer to this self-reflexive immorality as "meta-evil", and you'll see it spread through all our company products and services in the future, which by the way will be a bleak and terrible one."
So far Microsoft has not commented on whether they will claim that GEvil infringes on its patent for evil.
Ugh. What a horrible acronym. It sounds like some nasty disease:
Doctor: So, what seems to be the problem?
Patient: Well, I have this persistent burning sensation, um, "down there".
Doctor: I see. Do you also feel as if a hundred tiny spiders are crawling up your anus?
Patient: Wtf!? How did you know that!?
Doctor: Uh-huh. Sounds like SCOTUS. You'd better drop your pants. I'll get the probe...
It was good enough back in the days of wood-burning computers
Oh man, that brings back some memories! Late nights cranking out code on my Bunyan 2500 - that puppy went through three cords of oak a week, and it kept the place warm to boot. And we didn't need any of that fancy book learnin' to make it work either; if you were a good hand at whittling, you could be a programmer. Never had a lick of trouble with the Bunyan, except for the occasional splinter. Oh sure, you had to keep some kindling around to get her started, but once she got goin' she could do anything - add, multiply, and of course, branch.
Internet? Pfft. We modulated the smoke exhaust by opening and closing the flue - you could see it for miles, unless it was raining, or windy. Hell, we had peer to peer networks back before most of you guys were even a swimmer in your dad's testicals.
There's still a few Bunyans around, if you know where to look. Auditors like them, since they're so good at logging, and keeping a paper trail. I think the Vatican still has one, though they only fire it up when they elect a new Pope. Ah, the good old days...
This eventually leads to an uninspired and unmotivated underclass
The same thing happens in other social systems. If there is no way to get ahead, you just do what is necessary to get along. It doesn't matter whether you are rolling cigars for Fidel, or stitching shirts for Wal-Mart.
Your criticisms of communism could just as easily apply to any authoritarian governmental system. Whether you call it Fascism, Communism, Monarchy, or Plutocracy doesn't really matter. When power is concentrated in the hands of a few, the few end up enriching themselves at the expense of the many. If they are unlucky, the many are occasionally rounded up and put to death (Stalin's purges, Nazi genocide, etc.)
The trick is to limit the power of the central government, something we have done in the U.S. with some degree of success. When that happens, rich folks fight each other for the right to exploit the rest of us, which is a better situation than if they combine forces to run (and ruin) everything.
The idea underlying the economic aspect of communism, whether you call it socialism, or "communitarianism", or just "sharing", works well in many facets of society, especially at the local level. We don't think twice about pooling the resources of society to do those things that work better that way, like running police departments, fire departments, or building infrastructure, etc. For those areas where it is less clear that it works well, like education and health care, we battle constantly to work out what is the best approach. And for areas where private citizens risking their capital produce the best results, we have a free enterprise system.
All governmental systems suffer from the negative aspects of human nature. Communism is particularly bad because it so completely centralizes power and decision-making, but other systems share its drawbacks to the extent that they do the same thing.
Anything else which the society in question wants to do (finds worth doing), it does through a government, whether these actions be enforcing social order, making citizens go to church, exploring space, giving away tax revenues to the company with the most lobbyists, whatever.
Replace "society in question" with "ruling class", and I'll agree with that statement.
Words have power. Arguing about the meaning of words, and how concepts are represented by words, is a natural part of the development of language. When we fight over words, we are helping to shape the language of the future.
I don't claim to have thought of this - I just finished listening to Bruce Sterling's excellent address on The Internet of Things, where he makes an interesting argument about early computers. They were described by many people as "thinking machines", and much of the effort expended in researching and building them was shaped by this idea of their nature. Sterling makes the point that a "thinking machine" is probably not as useful as a machine that is good at ranking, sorting, tagging, etc. - in other words, Google. What if we had thought of computers as something other than thinking machines? Would their development have been different? Would we be further along now if we had done so?
Maybe the statement "Wikipedia is not an encylopedia" is saying something really important about Wikipedia.
Well, they sent it back through time, and of course the Library of Congress is much bigger in the future.
So, just one actually.
As to why the Library of Congress was sent back through time, you have to understand that in the future, books are fighting an endless war with Google, which by that time controls all information, or at least, all electronic information. The libraries managed to stop Google's plan to assimilate all printed matter in 2012, and have been fighting back ever since. Sending the Library of Congress back to the past was a desperate maneuver. The idea was to take out Google's campus in Mountain View, California, shortly after they moved there in 2003. A direct strike was calculated to destroy the entire operation, and leave nothing but two wisps of smoke rising from Sergey Brin's charred Birkenstocks. The LOC volunteered for the mission, knowing it was a one way trip.
Sadly, it seems that the books were off in their calcuations not only in space, but also in time. So the future ascendancy of Google is assured.
Well, technically I suppose jaywalking and speeding are infractions, not misdemeanors, so they aren't really "crimes". Or if they are, we are all criminals.
I do think the GP was fully justified in calling 911 - he had a thief in his sights, red-handed, who was likely (hell, 99.999% certain) to commit another crime in the near future. Definitely the right time to drop the dime.
Using (pirated) PC-based video editing software, enterprising movies pirates have issued a new, improved version of the Da Vinci
code. A plot summary follows:
If you doubt the Market is artificial, ask why we don't just get rid of contract law. I mean, buyers will just gravitate to sellers who live up to their contracts, right?
This point is often lost on "free market" proponents. A strong legal system of contracts and regulations is an important factor in success of an economy. Countries without those structures fare very poorly - their economies tend to be dominated by corrupt, inefficient companies, or everything is decided by family connections or "warlords".
Slashdot Mirror
Dear Sir,
As the legal representatives of the Perfume Industrial Trade Association (PITA), we hereby order you to cease and desist from reproducing the scent of one of our represented products, specifically, "Putrid". We have determined that your sweat glands contain the same olfactory composition as "Putrid", which is copyrighted in the U.S. the E.U., China, Japan, and Hell and its environs (incl. Detroit). Pursuant to this order, you are hereby enjoined to:
To ensure compliance with this order, a PITA representative will on a weekly basis inspect your domicile, your motor vehicle, your place of business, and any locations you frequent to detect any olfactory residue that might allow the transmission of copyrighted odors.
PITA reminds you that without stern enforcement of copyright law, the public would not be able to enjoy the fruits of the research laboratories of the perfume industry, including such products as "Putrid", "Rancid", "Nauseating", and "Ecch!".
You know, a thought just occurred to me. If an eco-terrorist blows up a dam or something, and dies and goes to paradise, does he get 72 vegans?
Google Announces GEvil
In a surprise move today, Google announced the launch of GEvil, the second portal devoted to all things mean, nasty, and underhanded, the first of course being the website of the Republican Party.
CEO Eric Schmidt said that "There's a lot of evil in the world already, but we feel that by bringing our first-class infrastructure and youthful energy to bear, we can take evil to new depths. Soon, there will be no escape from evil - we will make it available everywhere.
Asked how the move fits in with the company's motto, "Don't Be Evil", Schmidt replied, "See, that's the beauty of it right there. In truth, we've been evil all along, and our deceptive motto is itself a form of evil. Our researchers and engineers refer to this self-reflexive immorality as "meta-evil", and you'll see it spread through all our company products and services in the future, which by the way will be a bleak and terrible one."
So far Microsoft has not commented on whether they will claim that GEvil infringes on its patent for evil.
Ugh. What a horrible acronym. It sounds like some nasty disease:
Doctor: So, what seems to be the problem? ...
Patient: Well, I have this persistent burning sensation, um, "down there".
Doctor: I see. Do you also feel as if a hundred tiny spiders are crawling up your anus?
Patient: Wtf!? How did you know that!?
Doctor: Uh-huh. Sounds like SCOTUS. You'd better drop your pants. I'll get the probe
This will be especially difficult as companies frame DRM as a good thing for the consumer.
I think my sig has never been more apropos ...
It was good enough back in the days of wood-burning computers
Oh man, that brings back some memories! Late nights cranking out code on my Bunyan 2500 - that puppy went through three cords of oak a week, and it kept the place warm to boot. And we didn't need any of that fancy book learnin' to make it work either; if you were a good hand at whittling, you could be a programmer. Never had a lick of trouble with the Bunyan, except for the occasional splinter. Oh sure, you had to keep some kindling around to get her started, but once she got goin' she could do anything - add, multiply, and of course, branch.
Internet? Pfft. We modulated the smoke exhaust by opening and closing the flue - you could see it for miles, unless it was raining, or windy. Hell, we had peer to peer networks back before most of you guys were even a swimmer in your dad's testicals.
There's still a few Bunyans around, if you know where to look. Auditors like them, since they're so good at logging, and keeping a paper trail. I think the Vatican still has one, though they only fire it up when they elect a new Pope. Ah, the good old days...
Answer: July 4, 1776
This eventually leads to an uninspired and unmotivated underclass
The same thing happens in other social systems. If there is no way to get ahead, you just do what is necessary to get along. It doesn't matter whether you are rolling cigars for Fidel, or stitching shirts for Wal-Mart.
Your criticisms of communism could just as easily apply to any authoritarian governmental system. Whether you call it Fascism, Communism, Monarchy, or Plutocracy doesn't really matter. When power is concentrated in the hands of a few, the few end up enriching themselves at the expense of the many. If they are unlucky, the many are occasionally rounded up and put to death (Stalin's purges, Nazi genocide, etc.)
The trick is to limit the power of the central government, something we have done in the U.S. with some degree of success. When that happens, rich folks fight each other for the right to exploit the rest of us, which is a better situation than if they combine forces to run (and ruin) everything.
The idea underlying the economic aspect of communism, whether you call it socialism, or "communitarianism", or just "sharing", works well in many facets of society, especially at the local level. We don't think twice about pooling the resources of society to do those things that work better that way, like running police departments, fire departments, or building infrastructure, etc. For those areas where it is less clear that it works well, like education and health care, we battle constantly to work out what is the best approach. And for areas where private citizens risking their capital produce the best results, we have a free enterprise system.
All governmental systems suffer from the negative aspects of human nature. Communism is particularly bad because it so completely centralizes power and decision-making, but other systems share its drawbacks to the extent that they do the same thing.
Anything else which the society in question wants to do (finds worth doing), it does through a government, whether these actions be enforcing social order, making citizens go to church, exploring space, giving away tax revenues to the company with the most lobbyists, whatever.
Replace "society in question" with "ruling class", and I'll agree with that statement.
Words have power. Arguing about the meaning of words, and how concepts are represented by words, is a natural part of the development of language. When we fight over words, we are helping to shape the language of the future.
I don't claim to have thought of this - I just finished listening to Bruce Sterling's excellent address on The Internet of Things, where he makes an interesting argument about early computers. They were described by many people as "thinking machines", and much of the effort expended in researching and building them was shaped by this idea of their nature. Sterling makes the point that a "thinking machine" is probably not as useful as a machine that is good at ranking, sorting, tagging, etc. - in other words, Google. What if we had thought of computers as something other than thinking machines? Would their development have been different? Would we be further along now if we had done so?
Maybe the statement "Wikipedia is not an encylopedia" is saying something really important about Wikipedia.
Well, they sent it back through time, and of course the Library of Congress is much bigger in the future.
So, just one actually.
As to why the Library of Congress was sent back through time, you have to understand that in the future, books are fighting an endless war with Google, which by that time controls all information, or at least, all electronic information. The libraries managed to stop Google's plan to assimilate all printed matter in 2012, and have been fighting back ever since. Sending the Library of Congress back to the past was a desperate maneuver. The idea was to take out Google's campus in Mountain View, California, shortly after they moved there in 2003. A direct strike was calculated to destroy the entire operation, and leave nothing but two wisps of smoke rising from Sergey Brin's charred Birkenstocks. The LOC volunteered for the mission, knowing it was a one way trip.
Sadly, it seems that the books were off in their calcuations not only in space, but also in time. So the future ascendancy of Google is assured.
I do think the GP was fully justified in calling 911 - he had a thief in his sights, red-handed, who was likely (hell, 99.999% certain) to commit another crime in the near future. Definitely the right time to drop the dime.
You lost me after 'First,'
Does Godwin's Law apply if the post is on-topic??
Great. Thanks for posting that, now I need to sponge off my keyboard.
My photo will feature a great big Groucho Marx mustache and a Bozo wig. And I will supply a DNA sample ... from my cat.
Oh right, I'll just look it up. That'll take care of everything. You've been so helpful! How much do I owe you? and where do I send the check?
Using (pirated) PC-based video editing software, enterprising movies pirates have issued a new, improved version of the Da Vinci code. A plot summary follows:
Middle-aged Harvard professor Robert Langdon is giving a lecture in Paris when he is confronted by a police detective, who shows him a picture of a man who has been murdered in a gruesome fashion. Langdon, who has been living in an airport terminal, takes off in search of the holy grail, which has been stolen by a young Leo di Caprio. A gratuitous time warp takes him back to WWII to save Matt Damon from being killed by Nazis. Returning to the present, a slingshot around the moon reveals his presence to vengeful mobsters, who are unimpressed by his skill at ping-pong and shrimping. Escaping from them via Fed-Ex cargo plane only leads him to a close encounter with a volcano and a young Meg Ryan, with whom he has a cheesy and banal romance that only a woman could appreciate. With a newfound attitude towards the fairer sex he agrees to coach a group of weepy baseball players, but mysteriously, without even sleeping with any of them, he contracts AIDS and dies. But that doesn't stop our hero. He returns from the dead, bangs a mermaid, and brings joy to millions of kids before returning back to Paris where he started, which makes you wonder why the hell he left in the first place.
Isn't that what you get when you date a vegan chick who likes wheatgrass?
They should vanish in a brilliant flash of green ...
Oddly enough, "purge" is what I did to my stomach contents when I read about this story about Windows Media Player 11...
This point is often lost on "free market" proponents. A strong legal system of contracts and regulations is an important factor in success of an economy. Countries without those structures fare very poorly - their economies tend to be dominated by corrupt, inefficient companies, or everything is decided by family connections or "warlords".
I'd hack the President's shirt. Every time he came out of the bathroom his shirt would read, "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!"
I, for one, welcome our new shrink-proof, color-fast overlords...
"What's that Lassie? You say you found these pirated DVDs in a shipment from overseas?"
"Woof!"
"And all those DVDs contained copyrighted material stolen from my clients?"
"Woof!"
"And you say one of crates contained 500 copies of 'Bio-Dome' starring Pauly Shore? How would you describe his performance?"
"Woof!"
"Your Honor, I rest my case."