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User: Quiet_Desperation

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  1. OK, people... on US Claims Satellite Shoot-Down Success · · Score: 3, Funny

    I've seen the term "dick waving" quite enough for one day.

    Leave it to the Protocols of the Elders of Slashdot to put a negative spin on even this story.

    OK, you want conspiracy?

    Well, what *I* heard from my brother in law who knows a guy who reads the web site called thegovernmentislyingtoyou.org is that they are shooting down the spy satellite as a warning to the Space Station. It's basically NASA saying "We brought you into this world, and we can take you out of it."

    The astronauts will be taken from the Atlantis and flown directly to the Vatican (the *real* Vatican hidden under the Antarctic ice pack) where they must restate their loyalty oaths to the New World Order, or face prolonged sentences in pain amplification devices at Gitmo. Those patches on the spacesuits are actually agonizers.

    Seems those guys up there, especially when there's Russians on board, have been having whispered conversations (picked up by secret microphones placed on the ISS by the NSA, the DEA, the NRO, the Department of the Interior and the National Endowment for the Arts) involving phrases like "independent colony" and "breakaway republic in orbit" and similar subversive things.

    Oh, and according to enterprisemission.com, smokingscalarweapon.com and the Facebook page of a former alien abductee, the window for shooting down USA 193 is defined by the eclipsed moon passing through the seventh house of Jupiter, and the alignment of Mars with a portion of the sky identified in ancient Vedic texts describing a nuclear war in India in 14,000 B.C.

  2. Re:Linux is too commercial now man! on Google Funds Work for Photoshop on Linux · · Score: 4, Funny

    I predict if they get Photoshop running properly on Linux, Linux users will abandon the OS in favor of something even more obscure and difficult to use. There is another theory that states that this has already happened.

  3. Re:I can assure you on Cringely Looks at the WikiLeaks Debacle · · Score: 5, Funny

    would rather see a Paris Hilton sex video.

    I've seen it. That bank documents are more arousing.

  4. Re:Losing relevance... on New Science Standards Approved in Florida · · Score: 1

    The Roman Catholic church has recognized evolution essentially as fact and completely compatible with the bible. So I don't really understand what the problem is with Protestants in this country.

    Just a guess: Protestant != Catholic

  5. OK on Gravity Lamp Grabs Green Prize · · Score: 1

    So now we just build one 200 feet tall, and an array of 5000 of them, and we eliminate out energy problems forever!

    Build them in Kansas. They don't believe in gravity there anyway, so they won;t see them.

  6. Well! on 1.8 Million US Court Rulings Now Online · · Score: 1

    I see my summer reading plans are set! Woot!

    They should get Phoenix Wright, Ace Attorney to be the site avatar/host now that he's retired.

  7. Wow on NASA Plans Lunar Mobile Phone Network · · Score: 3, Funny

    "Guess where *I'm* calling from!"

  8. Bleah on Alienware Planning Android iPhone Killer? · · Score: 2, Interesting

    So nearly half of its structure is junky looking "futuristic" plastic just for looks?

    If they got rid of hat and just put the keyboard there, they wouldn't need a failure prone moving slider part.

  9. Re:moto on Rush Limbaugh Begs Steve Jobs For Bug Fixes · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    Yeah. Where's the "let's all come together" Obama-mania?

    I hear more vitriol from Obama supporters and *anyone* else.

  10. Give me fuel, give me fire, give me that which I.. on Hydrogen-Powered cars with Zero-Carbon-Emission? · · Score: 1

    ...desire.

    There's an even better way to separate the hydrogen and carbon. Burn it. :-)

    Eample: C7H16 + 22 O2 = 7 CO2 + 8 H20

    Yeah, your C and H gets all mucked up with that nasty O, but there ya go.

  11. The best argument... on EU Commissioner Proposes 95 year Copyright · · Score: 1

    ...against people living off early works is the Phil Spector Syndrome.

    You wind up with things like this prowling around and causing deaths.

  12. Re:Absurd on EU Commissioner Proposes 95 year Copyright · · Score: 4, Insightful

    So get a job, honestly, nobody inherently deserves to be able to survive decades from doing something once early in life Or *invest* those earnings from the big hit and live off of that. I have no sympathy for people who were millionaires due to some one time hit and then frittered it away.
  13. Re:dubious? on How Spam Was Done 70 Years Ago · · Score: 0

    Puritan? I was arguing the exact opposite. They aren't dubious pleasures, they're great pleasures! Add in hookers and I'm in heaven!

    I really have to remember that the average IQ of Slashdot has fallen in recent years, and that I need to add explanatory supplements to every little quip.

  14. Who cares? on Whatever Happened To The Joystick? · · Score: 1

    They're in the same place as the buggy whip, hand cranked Ditto machines, wire voice recorders, the Zune and the Underwood typewriter.

    Let it go. Move on.

  15. Because... on Australia's Geekiest Man · · Score: 1

    Why have a key to open your front door when you can have an RFID tag implanted in your arm that will do the trick? Because someone, somewhere, will think, "Hmm, if I chop off that guys arm, I can get into his house."
  16. Re:Save energy: don't send so much light into spac on DOE Shines $21M on Advanced Lighting Research · · Score: 1

    Interesting. Do you have any references for properly lighting your home for maximum crime deterrence?

    Not handy. Google is your friend. The studies were more focused on commercial zones, if I recall correctly.

    I have a streetlight right in front of my house, but have still had a couple minor criminal incidents.

    Oh, well, that disproves everything then.

  17. dubious? on How Spam Was Done 70 Years Ago · · Score: 4, Funny

    gambling, liquor, and other dubious pleasures There's nothing dubious about them.

  18. Re:Save energy: don't send so much light into spac on DOE Shines $21M on Advanced Lighting Research · · Score: 1

    Well, I was speaking more about street and public lighting in commercial areas. They thought one of the factors was that a crook has to use a flashlight, and that's noticeable.

  19. Re:Save energy: don't send so much light into spac on DOE Shines $21M on Advanced Lighting Research · · Score: 5, Insightful

    There's even studies that show a lot of lighting does NOT deter crime. All it does is let the crook see what he's doing.

  20. Yeah on Disney Takes Another Stab at the House of the Future · · Score: 1

    Closets will help pick out the right dress for a party. Countertops will be able to identify groceries set on them and make menu suggestions. I know when I wake up in the morning I think, "Gosh, I wish my house yammered at me more."

    I dunno... this all this sounds really annoying.
  21. Re:Maybe too late. Already weened. on Writers Strike Officially Over · · Score: 1

    Well, I'll stick with a nice large TV. Better for the gaming.

    And I'll still eat in front of the TV. It's multitasking. It's efficient. :-) I even bought special plates that they use in mental institutions to reduce spills. :-D

    I've been considering going strictly to DVD for television shows. I'm already doing that with Dexter because I won't subscribe to Showtime for one show. Besides, I still don't forgive them for canceling Dead Like Me.

    Everything hits DVDs eventually, even stuff with short runs like Firefly, and Netflix reduces the cost to a minimal amount It's about $1 a rental for my rate of turnover + a few cents for blank media if I want to keep a copy.

    I've fallen away from BitTorrent. A few too many broken files and weird video codecs. Just gimme a disc.

  22. Re:What a waste... on The Shadow Space Race · · Score: 1

    We're not going to make it, and we don't deserve to. I found it all really interesting.

    It's "Oh woe is us!" attitudes like yours that make *me* misanthropic.

    What are these wondrous other things we could be doing in space? Ever consider that if they were really practical and provided the return you thought they did, someone would be doing them? I work in the space industry, and most people have no damned idea was a pain in the arse it is to do anything.
  23. Don't like "Vista Capable?" on Microsoft Had Doubts About the 'Vista Capable' Label · · Score: 1

    How about Handi-capable?

  24. Oooo! The X-Force! on Web Browsers Under Siege From Organized Crime · · Score: 1

    I didn't know IBM hired Rob Liefeld. Did they put Cable in charge of the investigation?

    Organized crime, huh? When they hit your browser, does the screen just go black?

  25. Re:I believe it on Internet "Creates Pedophiles" According to "Expert" · · Score: 1

    It doesn't matter what you believe or are feeling, the Internet is big enough that you can find a group of people just like you.

    I dunno... After 20 years on the internets I'm still looking. :-(