Boeing Throws Space Station Parts Away
Bob Plankers writes: "Boeing staff were seen combing a landfill looking for $750,000 worth of space station parts that were inadvertently discarded. You can get the full details on CNN. " Luckily, there were spare parts still around -- but it's a pretty funny story nonetheless.
Finally. I'm now an initiated troll!
Moderate this down to (Score:-1,Troll)
Trollz rool.
Nuff said.
Really, the way the space program's going, was anyone really surprised by this? I mean, it really seems to have been a while since something actually worked! At least this one can't be pinned on aliens.....
"Isn't that the sweetest little well-balanced undergraduate-level philosophy of life."
Reading this article, I wonder about the usefulness of this. I personally think that "Using Enzymes to help fight CO2 build-up" is pretty pointless. I think that "Using Enzymes to petrify Natalie Portman" would be a more productive use of taxpayer dollars.
I'm completely Libertarian.
As a Libertarian, I'm opposed to using taxpayer money to fund scientific research. But as a sensible human being, logic demands that ANY PRICE neccessary to turn Natalie Portman to stone MUST BE PAID. The taxpayers will understand that their money is being taken for a good cause.
Other than that, I'm completely Libertarian.
All taxation is evil and must be abolish, except for taxation used to fund research into transforming actress Natalie Portman into a nude marble statue. People should be required pay 40% of their income towards this goal.
Other than that, I'm completely Libertarian.
Well, I *DO* think everyone in the world is also entitled to receive, from society if they are unable to afford one, exactly one (1) nude petrified teenage girl. Not neccessarily Ms. Portman, because there's only one of her, but SOME teenage girl.
Other than that, I'm completely Libertarian.
Of course, we don't have enough cute teenage girls in the world for everyone to have one. Therefore, I support the genetic engineering of teenage girls, and I support the citizenry being required to parent and raise these girls who, upon reaching the age of 17, will be turned over to the government for petrification.
Other than that, I'm completely Libertarian.
Those who are required to parent and raise these future statues will be given a 5% tax deduction. Those who are not required but volunteer will receive a 10% tax deduction.
Other than that, I'm completely Libertarian.
Some may say that cute teenage girls like Natalie Portman have the right not to be turned to stone. But I believe it's okay, because it's FOR THE GOOD OF SOCIETY.
Other than that, I'm completely Libertarian.
I also think European people have very bad attitudes and should be banned by law from society.
Other than that, I'm COMPLETELY Libertarian!
Dear Slashdot:
Tired of MPAA oppression? Tired of their attempts to censor and supress every instance of the DeCSS source? Want to put it somewhere where it will be visible to the public now and forever, and they can never take it away? There's such a place.
That's right, Natalie Portman's ass.
Only by tattooing the DeCSS source on Natalie Portmans's shiny nude buttocks can we be sure that it will be ours now and forever. Natalie Portman's ass belongs to America, and the anti-American MPAA can NEVER take it away from us. The "AA" in MPAA actually stands for ANTI-AMERICAN.
Also, MPAA stands for Ms. Portman's Ass = American. They KNOW that Natalie Portman's ass is a historical landmark which can't be robbed from us. And they're afraid that once the DeCSS source is tatood there, they'll never be able to take it away again.
Well, they're RIGHT. Once the DeCSS source is tattood on Natalie Portman's ass, we will see it time and time again on television and in movies, in magazines and in many other exciting places.
Natalie Portman's ass holds the key to our freedom... are we going to explore Natalie Portman's ass, or are we going to turn our backs to Natalie Portman's ass, and the sweet comforts it offers?
Only YOU can decide, America. Only YOU can decide.
CHRIS AND CHRISTINE NAKED AND PETRIFIED
HELLO!!!
I think they're cute. I'd like to petrify both of them into nude marble statues while they're engaged in the act of sexual intercourse with each other! I'm aroused by the ideas of couples (and friends, and family members) being turned to stone together!
HOW SEXY CAN YOU GET.
I think that we should replace the traditional wedding. Instead, at weddings, the bride and groom should remove their clothing and then THE BRIDE AND GROOM SHOULD BE TURNED TO STONE! THEY THEY WOULD BE A PAIR OF CUTE NUDE MARRIED MARBLE PETRIFIED STATUES!
This is the most 1337 idea I've ever had!!!!
I'm too sexy for this site
Too sexy for this site
Too sexy, daaaaamn right
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
And I'm, too sexy for JonKatz,
Too sexy for JonKatz,
what's he think about that?
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
I'm too sexy for you trolls
Too sexy for you trolls
Go back into your holes.
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
And I'm to sexy for AC's
Too sexy for AC's
They wish they could write posts like these
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
I'm too sexy for Roblimo
Too sexy for Roblimo
Nobody ever liked himo.
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
And I'm too sexy for RedHat
Too sexy for RedHat
It is bloated dumb and fat
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
I'm too sexy for Trollmastah
Too sexy for Trollmastuh
His posts are inferior to mine, basta'
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
And I'm too sexy for your karma
Too sexy for your karma
Go post at ZD-net you harma
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
I'm too sexy for Signal11
Too sexy for Signal11
He dies but he doesn't go to heaven.
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
I do my sexy thing here at Slashdot.
Yeah here at Slashdot, yeah
I post a lot of posts here at Slashdot.
MY FAVOURITE PASSTIME IS TO ROUND UP A BUNCH OF 16-YEAR-OLD FEMALE CHEERLEADERS IN SHORT SKIRTS, AND TRANSFORM THEM INTO A BUNCH OF PETRIFIED MARBLE 16-YEAR-OLD CHEERLEADER STATUES!!!!!!!!!
IF THE MPAA TRIED TO STOP ME FROM DOING THIS, I'M GOING TO BUST THEIR ASSES BACK TO THE STONE AGE. NOBODY STANDS BETWEEN ME AND MY PETRIFIED MARBLE CHEERLEADER STATUES!!!
***WHAT REALLY HAPPENED ON MARS*** (Score:0)
by Anonymous Coward on 07:24 PM January 17th, 2000 CST
(#109)
Everyone *CLAIMS* the lander was shot down by aliens.
This is FALSE.
Those of us REALLY in the know are aware that the lander was
ACTUALLY ambushed by a squad of petrified cheerleaders who
weren't wearing any panties so you could life up their
cheerleader skirts and see their PETRIFIED BUTTOCKS.
But WAIT, I know what you're saying. Petrified cheerleader
can't move. How did they ambush the polar lander?
EXACTLY. They didn't have to do a thing. They polar lander
saw them, the guys at NASA controlling the thing got
erections and started masturbating, and they lost control of
the lander. But they STILL have the camera pictures of the
petrified girls, and they're STILL wacking off to pictures
of
"THE FAMOUS PETRIFIED CHEERLEADERS OF MARS"
Natalie Port-man, Natalie Port-man
Doin' the things that a Natalie can
Is she a woman, or is she a statue?
Nobody knows, Natalie Port-man.
Natalie Port-man, Natalie Port-man
Got turned to stone by a frying pan
When she's underwater does she get wet?
YES she does, and it's really hot,
that's what I think, Natalie Port-man.
Roblimo Man, Roblimo Man,
Roblimo Man gr0ks Natalie Port-man,
He have a fuck, Natalie orgasms,
Then she turns to stone, Natalie Port-man.
JonKatz Man, JonKatz Man,
JonKatz Man writes an article about Natalie Port-man.
Slashdot insults, Natalie doesn't care,
Because she's a statue, Natalie Port-man.
AC-Man, AC-Man,
AC-Man hates JonKatz man.
So does everyone else, but they like Natalie Port-man,
Hot naked girl, Natalie Port-man.
Natalie Port-man, Natalie Port-man
Doin' the things that a Natalie can
Is she a woman, or is she a statue?
Nobody knows, Natalie Port-man.
Y0V F0RG07 N4K3D 4ND P37R1F1ED!!!
Y0V N33D 2 4DD 4 \/\/H013 107 0F 5747V3 57VFF 70 7H3 1157!!!! 4ND M4YB3 GR175 F0R U4R137Y!!!!!
Seriously now, I bend over backward to write in-depth, meaningful "NAKED AND PETRIFIED" articles for this site, and THIS is the thanks I get? C'mon. Include the Naked and Petrified movement in your list. We need all the help we can get!
I've had over 100 moderation points spent on my posts so far (20 on the Open Letter to ESR, 34 on my "First Post!!!", and 1 on about 50 other posts). 1 4M 50 31337!!!!
Any reason you're being such a jerk? There's not really much merit to what you say. But I'll address it anyway.
I guess a lot because people aren't buying into this. I guess it's in the same vein as "Gee well I guess because people are black/jewish/gay/straight/different in any way we will hurt them, torture them, and then cremate them in ovens it is just abhearent.
Is it "abhearent" to give someone an eternal, peaceful life if they choose to accept it? I'd never really turn a girl to stone long-term against her will. If I ever implied I would, it was just to upset the Politially Correct crowd out there. And it worked! Your analogy is very poor. First, generally when hurting someone, the activity is being performed AGAINST HIS/HER WILL! And even if the person were masochistic or something, you'd still be HURTING someone. You've got no way of establishing that being transformed into a statue could be considered "harm," especially if it were a willing transformation.
In a word no. Basically this is just an indication of a control oriented invididual who wishes to have unlimited sexual contact without any consequences. An ego taken into extreme preportions.
I simply want a world of statues. A world where there are ONLY females, and the females are statues, because males are bad and don't deserve to live, and it is wrong to force females to live in an animate, biological state and to grow old and die. Being a male, I have no place in this world. I will be dead. But I will be happy that I fulfilled my purchase in life. Can the dead be controlling and egotistical? If I were controlling and egotistical, why would I want the females to remain stone after I died? I wouldn't be getting anything out of it after my death. So why not set it up to restore them after my death?
BECAUSE I'M NOT MOTIVATED BY PERSONAL GAIN!! I only want what's best for the women and the world.
Including you? I doubt it from your views. Since cells will be replaced with crystaline formations (you said stone) that will be the basis for this new "life form". It get's a little fuzzy about exactly how the need to reproduce is eliminated. As a biological person I may elect not to reproduce or to sit in a bunker under ground for the rest of my life. See the need for sex has been eliminated.
The statues the girls will be transformed to will not be "alive" in the biological sense, but they WILL be CONSCIOUS, which to many people is perfectly good definition of "alive" even if the consciousness isn't inhabiting a body that is biologically alive. Don't you know anything about statues? When's the last time you saw a statue reproduce? The girls will not need to perform any biological functions, and will be incapable of moving or reproducing in any way. They will be STATUES. Say that out loud.
Statuephile? Sounds like a new doctorine. I have a hard time believing that this is something other than something quite recent. Have you ever had sex before with a real person? Other than your mother? Well people find it interesting because there is a massive endorphin release from doing said act. If you have a method of releasing endorphins directly into your pleasure center of your brain I would love to hear about it.
Those who live only for the lusts of the flesh (endorophins included) are doomed to die to the lusts of the flesh, after living lives of sin and decadence.
We've been around forever, but it's only within the past decade that, thanks to the Internet, we've begun to find each other, and organize. For most, there IS no doctrine, it's just a sexual interest, they don't believe in any particular philsophy as I pretend to do in these troll-posts. It's just what they like instead of, or in addition to, sex. Most enjoy sex as well. Some don't. To each his or her own.
Yes, I have had sex, with a woman, when I was 18. I didn't enjoy it, just as I knew I wouldn't. And I'm never going to do it again. Because I choose not to.
So you think that the christian second comming of christ will bring about an end to sexual reproduction? Ineresting unless he kills all of us there still has to be a method of reproduction that is simple and quick and sexual reproduction fits the bill.
There's simply NO excuse for this. You obviously haven't even read the Bible. If you did, you'd know that we'll ALL be transformed into our spiritual bodies at Christ's return. The Bible states over and over again that we have exactly TWO bodies, no more, no less. One is a physical, earthly, mortal body that is prone to sin and death. The other is our spiritual body, which is celestial, immortal, not subject to the desires of the flesh, and is incapable of feeling pain, being damaged, lusting, or reproducing. When a person dies, he instantly enters his/her spiritual body, the body in which he will eventually stand judgement. When Christ returns, all who remain alive will ALSO enter their spiritual bodies, and we will be the same as those who have died. We will not all perish, but we will ALL be changed into our spiritual bodies.
If you read the Bible, you'd know this stuff. There's NO excuse not to!!!
Don't trip over your shoes billy or maybe all the used porn magazines that you colored the skin grey on to make them look like statues. Your father and I have really had concerns about your welfare ever since you started handing out with those terrible slashdot kids. You have started to do strange things and quite frankly we are concerned. Now take your prozac and a glass of warm milk and get ready for military school in the morning ok?
That was just a mindless, insulting troll and doesn't deserve a response. So it won't get one.
Any reason you're being such a jerk? There's not really much merit to what you say. But I'll address it anyway.
I guess a lot because people aren't buying into this. I guess it's in the same vein as "Gee well I guess because people are black/jewish/gay/straight/different in any way we will hurt them, torture them, and then cremate them in ovens it is just abhearent.
Is it "abhearent" to give someone an eternal, peaceful life if they choose to accept it? I'd never really turn a girl to stone long-term against her will. If I ever implied I would, it was just to upset the Politially Correct crowd out there. And it worked! Your analogy is very poor. First, generally when hurting someone, the activity is being performed AGAINST HIS/HER WILL! And even if the person were masochistic or something, you'd still be HURTING someone. You've got no way of establishing that being transformed into a statue could be considered "harm," especially if it were a willing transformation.
In a word no. Basically this is just an indication of a control oriented invididual who wishes to have unlimited sexual contact without any consequences. An ego taken into extreme preportions.
I simply want a world of statues. A world where there are ONLY females, and the females are statues, because males are bad and don't deserve to live, and it is wrong to force females to live in an animate, biological state and to grow old and die. Being a male, I have no place in this world. I will be dead. But I will be happy that I fulfilled my purchase in life. Can the dead be controlling and egotistical? If I were controlling and egotistical, why would I want the females to remain stone after I died? I wouldn't be getting anything out of it after my death. So why not set it up to restore them after my death?
BECAUSE I'M NOT MOTIVATED BY PERSONAL GAIN!! I only want what's best for the women and the world.
Including you? I doubt it from your views. Since cells will be replaced with crystaline formations (you said stone) that will be the basis for this new "life form". It get's a little fuzzy about exactly how the need to reproduce is eliminated. As a biological person I may elect not to reproduce or to sit in a bunker under ground for the rest of my life. See the need for sex has been eliminated.
Important Poll for Slashdot, please answer
If you could transform any 5 (or 10, or 50, whatever you feel like) young women into statues:
1. What females would you choose, in order from my favorite downwards?
2. Why would you choose those females?
3. What kind of stone (or other immobile substance, natural or manmade) would you transform them into?
4. Describe the pose each girl would be in.
5. Describe the facial expression each girl would have.
6. Explain what each girl would be wearing, if anything.
7. Explain what you would do with the girls after they were petrified.
8. Anything else you'd care to add here.
Thanks for your participation!
Ladies (and faeries), you can list men instead of women if you're so inclined. I don't discriminate.
I spend all my time fantasising about petrification; more specifically, thinking about magically transforming cute naked teenage girls into cute naked teenage marble statues, and then admiring and them and perhaps having some sexual contact with them and perhaps masterbating while looking at them and ejaculating on their petrified bodies.
I have no normal sexual desire at all. I consider sexual intercourse or any sexual contact with a biological person to be the most disgusting thing imaginable. Petrificaion is all that I care about. I spend like 4 hours a day masterbating while thinking about cute girls like Natalie Portman and Lacey Chabert being turned to stone.
Maybe there's nothing wrong with this. I dunno. You tell me.
So you want to advance science?
You want exploration?
You want excitement?
You want to waste millions of dollars of taxpayer money?
FUCK MARS
Work on a way to turn cute teenage girls to stone!!
That's what would REALLY help out humanity!!!
So, you say that the 99% should be able to supress and trod all over the 1%, and the 1% are supposed to just sit there and take it?
I realize my letter was too harsh. But after being crushed under the heel of the sexualist regime for my entire life, I'm sure you'll feel a little pent-up anger is justified. Just as Linux, BSD, and BeOS folks are rather justified in feeling a certain amount of hostility towards Microsoft.
But I apologize for my confrontational tone. Can we not just accept that statuephiles are statuephiles, and sexualists are sexualists, and live in peace without insulting on another?
I'm prepared to, if the other side is willing to at least try to be respectful.
And if not, I'm currently in legal discussion about begining to file suit against those who practice discrimination against statuephiles in states that ban discrimination based on sexual orientation, and pressing for laws in states where homosexuals are protected under Hate Crimes laws for statuephiles to be protected as well. If such laws cannot be passed, I may challenge the constitutionality of every law that protects or favours homosexuals but not of other sexual-orientation groups such as heterosexuals, heterostatuephiles, and homostatuephiles. I will not rest until the SUPREME COURT itself has struck down every one of those discriminatory laws. There are also a number of people I have in mind to take to court for slander, libel, and threats against me and others in the statuephile community.
Want to compromise, or want to get legal?
AN OPEN LETTER TO THE SEXUALISTS ON SLASHDOT
Dear Slashdot,
I'm a statuephile, but I have many sexualist friends (it's hard not to, seeing that the world is probably at least 99% sexualist), and many sexualist enemies.
I don't really have anything AGAINST sexualists. I can't say I understand their philosophy at all. And I consider what they do -- carnal acts involving the intersection of human genitals -- to be absolutely disgusting. I consider sex to be the most disgusting thing in the world. But they have their desires, just as I have mine. So I don't criticize them. I do unto them as I would have them do unto me.
But do I get the same treatment in return? No. Because I prefer preservation rather than destruction, glorification over violation, I'm called a "bad guy", a "freak", "sick", etc. etc. etc. I've even been compared to a rapist! Try figuring that one out... next they'll be comparing Bill Clinton to a good president.
Anyway, just another example of the tyrrany of the majority. Anything that is different is wrong. Anything that seems strange to them must be sick, twisted, perverted, and evil.
But regardless of how the two sides treat each other, there is one simple fact:
SEX IS KILLING OUR WORLD!!!
Sex kills. Sex can cause life. But sex DOES cause death. Sex spreads disease which are ravaging and destroying millions of lives and hundreds of cultures of this worlds. Not only practicing sexualists are affected, innocent children often inherited these sexually transmitted diseases from their sexualist parents.
Sex destroys. The gratitious sex in societies all over the world today result in millions of unwanted births and a population explosion that is rapidly depleting the resources of our world. It can't last forever. The sexualists will eventually see the folly of their ways. But it'll probably be too late.
Sex damns. Almost everyone in the world today engages in premarital sex, homosexual sex, or some other kind of sex that violates God's law. This has reached UNACCEPTABLE levels. We're becoming a world of lost people.
And yet, anyone who doesn't buy into the destructive sexualist paradigm is a "freak." Sex violates. Sex hurts. Sex demeans. Sex insults. Petrification glorified. Petrification preserves. Petrification perfects. Which sounds better to you?
People are too guided by their penii and clitorii to even think about these things clearly!!! They see statuephiles as a threat to their destructive paradigm and immediately say "VILLAIN!!" "FIEND!!" "FREAK!!", then they go out, get drunk, and search for someone who's genitals they'd like their own genitals to come in contact with. All they care about is where their next piece of "action" is coming from.
THAT is their life. Hollow, empty, just a constant quest for sex, sex, and more sex. That is the life of a sexualist. They refuse to see past their penii or clitorri and look at what they're DOING to the world. They refuse to look at the consequences of their reckless lifestyles.
All I advocate is HAPPINESS. I envision a world ruled by thousands of happy, nude, petrified teenage girls. It's a dream, but it's fun to think about.
And I'm some kind of monster because of this. Just look at all that's been said about me so far.
It's getting hard to care about the world. The sexualists will never change. They'll never realize that what we REALLY need to do is band together, find a way to turn girls to stone, and make it happen. In the Statue Age, the girls will be happy. The world will be happy.
Now, I know most people reading this are going to read it and say "his philosophy is something I've never heard before, and I don't agree with it, so that means he MUST be crazy." Typical Slashdot attitude. Typical WORLD attitude. We're all tempted to think like that sometimes. You guys in the majority have it easy. But please think about who you're judging.
I'm not asking you to agree with my beliefs. I'm not asking you to be a statuephile. I'm not asking you to march in any Statuephile Pride Marches. I'm just asking you to ACCEPT my beliefs, odd though they may be to you, just as I accept your beliefs, odd as they are to me. I think that putting one's genitals inside of what basically amounts to a moist bag of mucous, vomit, human waste, and foul fluids of all sorts is DISGUSTING. You think that transforming young women into statues is DISGUSTING. We agree on that. But can't we just accept each other's beliefs, and move on?
If you can at least agree to that, then all I'm asking you, for the sake of all of us, is PLEASE, reply to this message, and say "I will accept your beliefs, as long as you accept mine. We are all brothers and sisters. Lets not dwell on differences." Please do that, at least for YOURSELF.
Good day, and God bless.
Regards,
Anon. Coward #232362369
I HEAR THEY HAVE WAYS OF TURNING TEENAGE GIRLS TO STONE!!!
DID YOU KNOW THAT IN SOME STATE A FEW YEARS BACK, IN THAT TOWN NEAR AN FBI PLACE, FIVE REALLY FINE-ASS 16-YEAR-OLD GIRLS VANISHED FROM THEIR HOMES AND NOBODY COULD FIND THEM!!!
THEN, A YEAR LATER, THEY FOUND FIVE NAKED TEEN STATUES IN THE LIKENESS OF THE FIVE GIRLS!!! STATUE EXPERTS EXAMINED THE STATUES AND CONCLUDED THAT THE DETAILS SEEMED TOO FINE TO HAVE BEEN MAN-MADE!!!
ONE OLD WOMAN SAID THAT THE FBI WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR TURNING THE GIRLS TO STONE
!!!!!!********* BUT SHE DISAPPEARED TWO DAYS LATER ****************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WARNING: THE FBI TOOK AWAY THE OLD WOMAN BECAUSE SHE KNEW THE TRUTH!!!! THE STATUES ***********MUST*******8 HAVE BEEN THE PETRIFIED GIRLS, OTHERWISE THE OLD WOMAN NEVER WOULD HAVE DISAPPEARED. IT MUST BE THE FBI.
THE FBI WANTS TO TURN OUR TEENAGE GIRLS TO STONE! THEY WANT TO TURN OUR DAUGHTERS TO STONE! THEY WANT TO TURN OUR SISTERS TO STONE! THEY WANT TO TURN OUR GIRLFRIENDS TO STONE!!! THEY WANT TO TURN OUR FRIENDS TO STONE!!!
******************WHAT ****** ***WILL** ---YOU--- ---DO--- %%%WHEN%%% ***THE*** ---FBI--- $$$TURNS$$$ !!!###@@@###!!!YOUR!!!###@@@###!!! FAVORITE SEXY 16-YEAR-OLD GIRLTO STONE??? WHAT WILL YOU DO??????
STOP THE FBI BEFORE IT'S TOOOOOOOOOO LATE!!!!!!!
-----------------------------------------------
I don't really have anything AGAINST sexualists. Heck, 99% of the world is composed of sexualists. However, I think it's odd that I'm villified for preserving and glorifying, while the sexualists are praised for regularly violating, defiling, and engaging in carnal acts of all sorts. They are seen as big heroes because they've managed to get their genitals to come in contact with the genitals of somebody else. OOOOOOooo, I guess we're one step closer to world peace, now? No. One step closer to curing AIDS? No. SPREADING AIDS? Yes. Sexualists spread all kinds of filthy diseases, and cause thousands of unwanted pregnancies every year.
SEX IS KILLING OUR WORLD!!!!!!
And the sexualists don't even care. All they care about is where their next piece of action is coming from.
---------------------------------------------
We need a new AIBO feature
A FEATURE THAT TURNS GIRLS TO STONE!!!!!!!
Dear Slashdot:
This is what we need more than anything.
Please write to Sony and DEMAND that the next model of AIBO be fully able t
o transform cute teenage girls into cute teenage statues!!!
Let's imagine a sexy 17-year-old girl. Let's call her Sarah. Thanks to th
e new AIBO, we can have all KINDS of fun now.
It's Christmas morning.
Sarah is wearing this really sexy little pink silk dress.
She opens up a gift.... it's an AIBO!!
"Hooray!!" She's so happy. She plays with her new pet.
And then I, hiding outside, push the button on the special petrification re
mote control. Sarah looks down at the dog, smiling, and before she knows w
hat happened, the dog zaps her with the on-board petrification ray and she
hardens into a pretty little marble statue.
Then I go inside and feel her up a little bit, and take her and the dog bac
k to my place, where they will be my two best friends.
Then I pet the AIBO, and say "Good dog!!!"
THANK YOU FOR LISTENING
A.C.
-----------------------------------------------
Ha ha, he said "statue."
I bet he'd just LOVE to turn NATALIE PORTMAN into a statue, and have his way with her marble body!!!
-----------------------------------------------
Can Dark Matter turn girls to stone?
I wonder, is there possibly a way of turning girls to stone here? I'm not
really up on the latest science, but please, fill me in. I need to find a
way to transform some cute teenage girls into statues, so I'm asking if Dar
k Matter might be able to help me. Please help. I'm lonely. I need statu
es.
Tell me all about dark matter and how it might be useful for turning girls
to stone.
-----------------------------------------------
*** A VERY IMPORTANT POLL FOR SLASHDOT ***
This is to everyone in the Slashdot community. Please respond.
If you could transform any 50 cute teenage girls into statues, what 50 cute
teenage girls would you choose? What type of stone substance would you tr
ansform them into? Would they be wearing clothing? What sort of pose would
they be in? What kind of facial expressions would they have? Would you k
eep them petrified indefinately, or would it be a temporary job, or would i
t be part-time?
PLEASE USE AS MUCH DETAIL AS POSSIBLE
THANKS,
A.C.
-----------------------------------------------
HELLO FRIENDS:
PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME
PLEASE WRITE A VIRUS PROGRAM FOR ME SO THAT I CAN SEND IT TO CUTE GIRLS, AND WHEN IT IS RUN ON THEIR COMPUTES IT WILL TRANSFORM THEM INTO STATUES THROUGH THE MAGIC OF PROGRAMMING TECHNOLOGY!!!
PLEASE MAKE IT SO IT RUNS ON LINUX AND WINDOWS BECAUSE THE GIRLS WHO USE LINUX AND WINDOES ARE THE **CUTEST**!!!!!!!!!! THERE'S NO NEED FOR IT TO RUN ON BSD BECAUSE ***NO*** CUTE TEENAGE GIRL USES BSD!!! OR MACINTOSH!!!
REALLY ALL I WANT IS THE PROGRAM TO TURN THE TEENAGE GIRLS TO STONE, SO LIKE IF I'M TALKING TO A HOT GIRL ON IRC, I CAN JUST PUSH SOME BUTTONS AND SHE'LL BE TURNED TO STONE IN REAL LIFE!!!
PLEASE HELP ME DO THIS!!!!!!!
Thanks,
A.C.
-----------------------------------------------
GATHER ROUND, FRIENDS.
IN THE YEAR 2000, LET'S ROUND UP MILLIONS OF CUTE TEENAGE GIRLS, ASK THEM POLITELY TO
REMOVE THEIR CLOTHING, AND THEN ONCE THEY'VE DONE SO, HAVE THEM STAND ON
PEDESTALS AND USE EITHER MAGIC OR SCIENCE (WHICHEVER YOU PREFER) TO TRANSFORM
THEM INTO STATUES!!! I *LOVE* STATUES!! I LOVE TEENAGE GIRLS WHO HAVE BEEN
TRANSFORMED INTO STATUES!!!
WHO'S WITH ME ON THIS. LET'S GET IT ON.
WE'LL LET Y2K BE THE YEAR THAT A BUNCH OF TEENAGE GIRLS GET TURNED TO STONE. THEN
THE 21ST CENTURY WILL BEGIN, AND IT'LL BE KNOWN AS THE CENTURY OF THE PETRIFIED
TEENAGE GIRLS.
WE WILL ALL GATHER ROUND AND LOOK AT THE TEENAGE GIRLS WHILE WE.... Y'KNOW. Y'KNOW.
NUDGE NUDGE, NUDGE NUDGE, KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
***** ALMOST THE YEAR 2000, IT WILL BE THE LAST YEAR WE HAVE TO TURN GIRLS TO STONE
BEFORE THE 21ST CENTURY BEGINS LET'S NOT SQUANDER IT *****
-----------------------------------------------
Dear Slashdot:
I really really really need a way to transform cute, naked teenage girls into cute, naked teenage st-one girls. But, I'm having a bit of trouble actually making it happen. So I need help, from y'all, the best and brightest of the Unternet. I mean, Internet. Sorry.
Anyway, this "Redhat Software," with all this stuff they're buying up.... is there any way they might be able to help me turn hot young girls into hot young stat-ues that I can use for purposes of sexual gratification? If you can think of ANYTHING, please help me out here.
If anyone can provide me with an effective method of transforming teenage girls into stat-ues, in such a way that the girls remain conscious, and the condition is easily reversible, OR even provide me a good lead to such a method, I will provide him or her with a large sum of money.
Also, I am looking for cute teenage girls to volunteer to be stat-ues. This will pay moderate sums of money also. I would prefer if you were willing to be nude, however we can reach a compromise, I'm sure. Swimsuits would work for me. As long as you're st-one. TEENAGE GIRLS PLEASE RESOND TO THIS IS INTERESTED.
IF ANYONE KNOWS HOW TO TURN TEENAGE GIRLS TO STONE PLEASE RESPOND TO THIS!!!
Regards,
A.C.
p.s. This is *URRRRRGENT*
-----------------------------------------------
Someday, as soon as I can figure out how, I'm going to turn
a WHOLE BUNCH of cute teenage girls to stone. Then I'll
have a WHOLE BUNCH of cute teenage statues. They will be my
friends. They will be my companions. I will talk to them,
and hug them, and love them, and be their friends, and watch
television with them, and touch them in ways that will make
them happy. I will live with them in a little cabin in the
woods away from civilization. Just me and my petrified
girls. We will be together for all the rest of my life.
K?
-----------------------------------------------
I ENJOY FINDING TEENAGE GIRLS, PULLING DOWN THEIR PANTS, TURNING THEM (THE GIRLS, NOT
THE PANTS) TO *STONE*, AND THEN TOUCHING THE PETRIFIED BUTTOCKS!!!
I ENJOY FINDING TEENAGE GIRLS, PULLING DOWN THEIR PANTS, TURNING THEM (THE GIRLS, NOT
THE PANTS) TO *STONE*, AND THEN TOUCHING THE PETRIFIED BUTTOCKS!!!
I ENJOY FINDING TEENAGE GIRLS, PULLING DOWN THEIR PANTS, TURNING THEM (THE GIRLS, NOT
THE PANTS) TO *STONE*, AND THEN TOUCHING THE PETRIFIED BUTTOCKS!!!
I ENJOY FINDING TEENAGE GIRLS, PULLING DOWN THEIR PANTS, TURNING THEM (THE GIRLS, NOT
THE PANTS) TO *STONE*, AND THEN TOUCHING THE PETRIFIED BUTTOCKS!!!
I WOULD ENJOY FEEDBACK ON THIS, AS I'D LIKE TO IMPROVE MY TECHNIQUE. PLEASE POST YOUR
THOUGHTS ON PETRIFYING TEENAGE GIRLS. IF YOU HAVE ANY TIPS ON THE SUBJECT, PLEASE
SHARE THEM. HOW OFTEN DO YOU TURN TEENAGE GIRLS TO STONE? WHAT ARE YOUR
THOUGHTS ON IT? COMMENTS PLEASE!!!!
-----------------------------------------------
DEAR SLASHDOT:
WHAT I WOULD REALLY LOVE WOULD BE TO FIND A PLANET WHERE THERE ARE PEOPLE LIKE US,
AND THIS PLANET HAS A LOT OF CUTE TEENAGE GIRLS, AND THE PLANET IS REALLY HOT SO
THEY RUN AROUND IN SWIMSUITS, AND IT'S REALLY REALLY SEXY.
ANYWAY, ON THIS PLANET, THEY DON'T LET THEIR CUTE TEENAGE GIRLS GROW OLD AND DIE
LIKE WE DO ON OURS. THEY TREAT THEIR TEENAGE GIRLS RIGHT. THEY USE MAGIC ALIEN
TECHNOLOGY DEVICES TO TRANSFORM THE NAKED TEENAGE GIRLS INTO STATUES, THEN THEY
KEEP THE STATUES, AND WORSHIP THEM, AND LOOK AT THEM AND STUFF, AND MASTERBATE
WHILE LOOKING AT THE STATUES OF THE PETRIFIED GIRLS!!!
AND THE PETRIFIED GIRLS ARE *VERY HAPPY* AND THEY ARE HAPPIER THAN THEY WERE WHEN
THEY WERE ANIMATE, AND THEY ARE SEXY AND NAKED AND STONE AND TEENAGED FOREVER!!!
PLEASE PROVIDE FEEDBACK FOR THIS
HERE IS MY IDEA: WE BUILD A LARGE ROCKET-SHIP AND USE IT TO TRAVEL TO THIS PLANET. WE
TAKE WITH US THE FOLLOWING CUTE TEENAGE GIRLS:
-LACEY CHABERT
-NATALIE PORTMAN
-JESSICA ALBA
-THE OLSEN TWINS HA HA JUST KIDDING
-MAE LING MAK OKAY SHE'S NOT A TEENAGER BUT WE CAN PRETEND
-ALL THE CUTE TEENAGE GIRLS WHOSE NAMES I CAN'T REMEBER
WE TAKE THEM TO THIS PLANET AND THEY GET TURNED TO STONE BY THE ALIENS ON THE
PLANET!!! AND THEN WE CAN TOUCH THEIR ASSES AND STUFF.
PLEASE HELP ME TO DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TELL ME HOW TO GET TO THIS PLANET!!!!!! PLEASE TELL ME
HOW TO BUILD A ROCKET-SHIP SO THAT I CAN TAKE THE GIRLS TO THE PLANET!!!!!! PLEASE TELL
ME HOW TO GET THE GIRLS ONTO THE ROCKET-SHIP!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE TELL ME HOW TO SPEAK THE
ALIEN LANGUAGE AND HOW TO TALK TO THEM AND STUFF!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE HELP ME WITH DETAILS
OF THIS PLAN I MIGHT NOT HAVE THOUGHT OF!!!! WE ALL HAVE TO WORK TOGETHER IF THIS IS
GOING TO WORK!!!!
-----------------------------------------------
GATHER ROUND, FRIENDS.
I KNOW THERE ARE PLENTY OF CUTE GIRLS IN AUSTRALIA. I'D LIKE TO TURN THEM ALL TO
STONE. LET'S ALSO PETRIFY SOME KANGAROOS ALSO. THAT'D BE KINDA SEXY!!!
*** LET'S GET IT ON ***
*HOORAY FOR PETRIFIED GIRLS*
WE WILL TURN EVERY CUTE TEENAGE GIRL IN AUSTRALIA TO STONE, THEN THEY WILL TRULY BE
FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
IN THE YEAR 2000, LET'S ROUND UP MILLIONS OF CUTE TEENAGE GIRLS, ASK THEM POLITELY TO
REMOVE THEIR CLOTHING, AND THEN ONCE THEY'VE DONE SO, HAVE THEM STAND ON
PEDESTALS AND USE EITHER MAGIC OR SCIENCE (WHICHEVER YOU PREFER) TO TRANSFORM
THEM INTO STATUES!!! I *LOVE* STATUES!! I LOVE TEENAGE GIRLS WHO HAVE BEEN
TRANSFORMED INTO STATUES!!!
WHO'S WITH ME ON THIS. LET'S GET IT ON.
WE'LL LET Y2K BE THE YEAR THAT A BUNCH OF TEENAGE GIRLS GET TURNED TO STONE. THEN
THE 21ST CENTURY WILL BEGIN, AND IT'LL BE KNOWN AS THE CENTURY OF THE PETRIFIED
TEENAGE GIRLS.
WE WILL ALL GATHER ROUND AND LOOK AT THE TEENAGE GIRLS WHILE WE.... Y'KNOW.
Y'KNOW. NUDGE NUDGE, NUDGE NUDGE, KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
***** ALMOST THE YEAR 2000, IT WILL BE THE LAST YEAR WE HAVE TO TURN GIRLS TO STONE
BEFORE THE 21ST CENTURY BEGINS LET'S NOT SQUANDER IT *****
-----------------------------------------------
I REALLY REALLY WANT TO REMOVE NATALIE PORTMAN'S PANTS, TOUCH HER BUTTOCKS, AND
TRANSFORM HER INTO A STONE STATUE, THEN I WILL HAVE A PETRIFIED AND NAKED NATALIE
PORTMAN, WITH A BUTT THAT I CAN TOUCH ANYTIME I WANT!!!!
PLESE HELP ME TO DO THIS!!!!!
I REALLY REALLY WANT TO REMOVE NATALIE PORTMAN'S PANTS, TOUCH HER BUTTOCKS, AND
TRANSFORM HER INTO A STONE STATUE, THEN I WILL HAVE A PETRIFIED AND NAKED NATALIE
PORTMAN, WITH A BUTT THAT I CAN TOUCH ANYTIME I WANT!!!!
PLESE HELP ME TO DO THIS!!!!!
I REALLY REALLY WANT TO REMOVE NATALIE PORTMAN'S PANTS, TOUCH HER BUTTOCKS, AND
TRANSFORM HER INTO A STONE STATUE, THEN I WILL HAVE A PETRIFIED AND NAKED NATALIE
PORTMAN, WITH A BUTT THAT I CAN TOUCH ANYTIME I WANT!!!!
PLESE HELP ME TO DO THIS!!!!!
I REALLY REALLY WANT TO REMOVE NATALIE PORTMAN'S PANTS, TOUCH HER BUTTOCKS, AND
TRANSFORM HER INTO A STONE STATUE, THEN I WILL HAVE A PETRIFIED AND NAKED NATALIE
PORTMAN, WITH A BUTT THAT I CAN TOUCH ANYTIME I WANT!!!!
PLESE HELP ME TO DO THIS!!!!!
-----------------------------------------------
DEAR DEBIAN:
IF YOU COULD TRANSFORM ANY 50 HOT YOUNG WOMEN INTO STATUES, WHAT 50 HOT YOUNG
WOMEN WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
-----------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------------
I am the original poster (and the person who started the "naked and petrified" trend on Segfault, though a bunch of other lame-brains picked up on it... the sexually explicit comments were NOT mine, and I'm also the author of the famous "immobilized and not fully clothed" letter to ESR, the first ever "naked and petrified" post to reach a moderation point of 5, and stay there), and I would like to clarify.
I would NEVER transform a girl into a statue unwillingly if she didn't enjoy being a statue. If she did NOT like being a statue, I would immediately restore her to her animate state, apologize thoroughly, and go look for females with more of a proclivity for being marble.
Rufies are NOTHING of the sort. They do NOT actually transform flesh into any kind of inert substance while preserving the consciousness of the transformed person. That's what's important.
In all of my fantasies, the women LOVE being statues. In fact, the transformation is usually voluntary, or at the least, temporary. Many of the women I talk to about this say they DON'T think they'd probably enjoy being statues. But until science or magic actually advances far enough to find out, we don't know WHAT it would be like to be a statue, and whether or not the women would enjoy it.
So how can you decide if it's good or bad?
And since it's something that can never happen, in our lifetimes or probably ever, what is the bag fat hairy yak-brained idea??
Petriphilia (or statuephilia) is a VERY common interest. You'd be surprised how many hundreds of us there are on the Internet, and how many THOUSANDS in the world. So before you switch into FLAME FLAME FLAME FLAME mode, maybe you should read what this article is actually saying. How would you like it if I criticized YOUR sexuality?
Okay, I'll do just that.
GOD, YOU'RE SICK! YOU ACTUALLY HAVE *SEX* WITH PEOPLE! THAT'S DISGUSTING! YOU CAN GET ALL KINDS OF DISEASED AND PREGNANCY AND STUFF DOING THAT!!! SICK SICK SICK!! YOU SEXUALISTS MAKE ME WANT TO VOMIT! I'M HEVER READING SLASHDOT AGAIN!
There. You didn't like it very much, did you.
Throw stones elsewhere, or better yet, don't throw stones at all.
I was actually rather disheartened when this got moderated up. That's not what's supposed to happen. My "Open Letter to ESR" was supposed to be moderated up, and it was. Because, not to brag, it was very clever. This was no more clever than my favorite cartoon, Pokey the Penguin. It was meant for those who, like me, keep thresholds at -1, sort by score, and always skip to the bottom of the article to find the REAL good stuff.
I apologize for the inconvenience caused by it being moderated up.
For those who want to learn more about people who love turning girls to stone:
http://www.oaktree.net/argoforg
http://members.xoom.com/meddie/Medusa
We're really quite normal, good, honest people. Please don't judge us based on the fact that one of us (me) enjoys a good Troll now and then!!!
Good day, and God bless.
this was on wonko over a week ago. slashdot is lagged behind everything.
They're obviously a bunch of air-heads down there...not exactly on a higher plane...
I'm an engineer in Huntsville (not with Boeing, thank goodness!), so we got the details first-hand. Apparently, (or "allegedly", if you prefer), Boeing actually sent workers into the landfill to attempt to recover the parts! They found bits and pieces, but nothing big enough to haul back.
I'm guessing there's a tank with a light coating of peanut butter and banana peels sitting up on blocks in a redneck's yard by now . . .
I don't know the exact size of those puppies, but the ones that I have seen and worked with on other sections of the station (I work for Boeing) were big enough not to be easily "mis- placed." (roughly the size of a standard propane tank on a gas grill)
A good rule of thumb:
If you have a $750,000 piece of equipment in a nondescript crate sitting outside a building;
a) make it descript and label it profusely as NOT trash.
b) have someone watch it so it doesn't get stolen or sent to the trash.
But I guess (or hope) they won't make that mistake again.
IANAL, but I play one on
Thats sorta funny, people wonder why planes have been crashing....now this? Heh, maybe the producers should pay more attention, if the top of the line space parts could be confused with trash then, im not sure they should be used. (read the story? story? yeeessss......)
"Hey, Curly and Larry! Look, those boxes have SPACE painted on them. They must need space and want us to take them to the dump! Let's help them out, fellas!"
boeing staff were also seen combing their pants looking for $750,000 worth hot grits inadvertently poured down their pants. thank you.
These kind of incidents are why we need better policing of dumps. For example, each company should be audited once a week to make sure that aren't disposing of any environmentally harmful material such as gasoline or CFCs. And where the hell are the electric cars? If the government wasn't so busy trying to gouge prices on gasoline, we'd all be driving in flying, solar-powered cars. Anyone who's ever seen The Jetsons knows that an invention like this is not far out of our reach.
Write your Congressmen and Congresswomen. Demand change.
"Say, Kid, you haven't seen a couple of solid-fuel rocket motors lying around these parts, have you?"
"What do you mean, your dad's bolting them to the back of his pickup..?"
That was a dangerous situation for Boeing and possibly the US Government to be in. If a foreign organization found the spare parts then they could possibly steal Boeing's ideas and possibly start a space station.
On the other hand the parts may have been damaged, and if they were to be installed into a running and operational space station they may pose a danger to the crew on board.
This just shows how sensitive technology is these days.
US businesses that currently accept chip and PIN/signature
And if they can't find them, who did? I think it's pretty funny that there might be someone out there playing with a peice of the international spacestation.
Of course this all might be an exuse to buy more time for the station project to begin with...
"Out of all the things I lost in life, I miss my mind the most." --Ozzy Osborne
There have already been enough problems with the space station. This is the last thing we need. I hope Boeing is going to have to suffer the loss on this one since it was due to their stupidity.
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."
I also met a guy when I was in the Navy who was making a bundle buying nuclear grade parts by the pound at military auctions, doing a little research back to the manufacturer and either selling it back to the Navy or the manufacturer. Said he one made $40K off one valve alone.
And you wonder why the government spends so much money. (P/S. I work for a Navy Shipbuilder now, imagine losing a set of screws for an aircraft carrier).
"God fights on the side with the best artillery." - Napoleon, Marshal of France - speaking truth to power
"How much? Well, seein' as how you'z dressed whitey, I think it be pretty expensive."
I'll pay you $500,000.
"Ohhhh!!!!! This is it. This is the big one! Aaaaooohhh! I'm a comin' to join you honey!"
"Houston we're, uh, having a little trouble breathing up here...getting a little.... light... headed...."
"Ahhh jeez"
"What?"
"KNEW we forgot something... Sorry guys, theres no oxygen tanks on the station, pretty soon you guys are gonna be breathing pure CO2."
"..."
"Guys?"
How possibly a gas tank (of whatever kind -- it definitely isn't larger than the space station itself, and it is supposed to contain such a simple thing as liquified oxygen or nitrogen) can be this expensive? Doesn't it look like Boeing is being paid much more than what its products can possibly be worth?
(and if I am wrong, I would like to hear the explanation)
Contrary to the popular belief, there indeed is no God.
Bet if it was useful to anyone it got salvaged,
people are always finding treasure at the dump.
Like any labyrinthine corporate bueaucracy,no-one
could find their ass with both hands and a map,big
surprise there.
*Repent!Quit Your Job!Slack Off!The World Ends Tomorrow and You May Die!
"Uh, sir... We were on our way to the Bingo Parlor... and Uh..." I wonder if they have an opening in the janitorial dept? "Son there is a difference between dumb people and stupid people. Dumb people don't have a clue that they are idiotic things, while stupid people know that they are doing idiotic things and do them anyways." -- Dad
"Simple words such as 'better' or 'faster' are best used by simpletons. Life [...] is more complicated." - TMC
$700 for a pair of pliers, $900 for a toilet
seat... $750,000 for a couple of air tanks...
and would they have used the tanks if they
*had* found them??? talk about required
certification documents at every step from
production to installation...
I'm sure in the wrong field...
Ohh yeah ... and 2 new cars ... stupid me I left them too close to the curb ... the garbage people must of just picked them up by accident.
Ignore the "p2p is theft" trolls, they're just uninformed
Trollin' for Yu Suzuki
-=United Coalition of NINJAS for te Abolition of Moderaiton=-
TILL TROLL DAY!!!
Go ahead, m0d me down.
It's a Lisa!
---
As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
Unless Boeing comes public with a pledge that they'll absorb the cost, the perceived effect on the taxpaying community will be that the taxpayer gets to absorb the overrun resulting from Boeing's egregious mistake, and that Boeing suffer's a mere moment's bad PR. Perhaps the rest of /. finds this to be high comedy, but I'm of the mind that the space station and the space program in general suffer enough from public image woes as it is.
I'm looking forward to the day that the public looks upon our ailing space program (and, by extension, nationally funded R&D) as something more than an enormous public works project. No amount of positive spin can undo the damage caused by a handful of silly mistakes such as this.
Okay, 750 Grand would be more then enough to keep me more then happy for life. But in Aerospace Industrial terms, that is about the equivalent of me throwing away a box of Lil' Debbies that still had a bar in it.
This could be just about anything...plumbing fixture, space shuttle pain, gallons of tang. Who knows?
Hopefully I didn't put any [] around my words.
CAPE CANAVERAL, FL - A tragic day for the Earth as two astronauts have perished in space due to the idiocy of Boeing engineers. Two air tanks which would have provided air to the astronauts aboard the shuttle Endeavor were mistakenly left upon the ground, and in fact, in a land fill.
Amazingly, our under cover agents have been able to obtain a top secret audio recording of the communications just before the untimely death of America's newest heroes. Unfortunately, names are not yet known of the deceased:
[Astronaut #1] Mission Command, we have a problem. Our instruments show we're losing air up here. Please confirm.
[Mission Control] Uhh, Affirmative Endeavor. We show a slight drop in breathable air. Give us a minute, we'll get back to you on that.
[Astronaut #2] Tell them to hurry the fuck up! This dial isn't going anywhere but southward!
[Astronaut #1] Just.. give.. them.. some.. time. I'm.. sure.. they'll.. have.. an answer.
[MC] Endeavor, this is Mission Control. We recommend you use your suicide capsules within the next few minutes
[Astronaut #2] WHAT!? You're telling me..... there's no air.... aboard this fucking ship!?
[Astronaut #1] Stop yelling fool! You're wastin all the air!!
[MC] Well, guys, have a good one. Everyone down here is hailing your mission as a victory for all mankind... Make us proud gentlemen!
[Astronaut #1] Well, fuck... what do we do now?
As you can see, a shameless show of disregard for the lives of these brave astronauts. And all because Boeing couldn't keep track of a couple of fucking air canisters.
THIS WAS A JOKE. IF YOU CAN'T ACCEPT IT AS SUCH, DON'T READ IT
You should never take life too seriously - You'll never get out of it alive.
-Brad
I'd like to think that the largest tech-worker strike in history counts as "news for nerds" (After all, _I_ work there...). Propaganda at http://www.speea.org. Also photos of about 25 undelivered planes sitting out on the line. Good news collection at Yahoo .
-a Boeing Employee
Moe: Hey Larry, remember those nitrogen and oxygen tanks I gave you last month? Do you remember what happened to them?
Larry: Sure Moe, I gave them to NASA. They said they needed them to decorate the 'Mars Polar Lamp' or something...
Curley: Nyuk, Nyuk, Nyuk!
"Can of worms? The can is open... the worms are everywhere."
Well, at least the tanks for storing hot grits are ok.
--Chris
You have violated Yu Suzuki's Golden Rule by including the Devil's Letter (also known as 'H') in your post. Please refrain from using tis vile letter in future posts and repent so tat Yu Suzuki may save your sinful soul. For your convenience, a corrected version of your post appears below.
I had a clean up department at a hospital trash $10k in parts, but leave empty boxes next to the parts. If they could be used on anything but what I was using them for, I'd expect to see the parts show up on ebay. blah.
Trollin' for Yu Suzuki
-=United Coalition of NINJAS for te Abolition of Moderation=-
I'm sure they will build some more.
Trollin' for Yu Suzuki
-=United Coalition of NINJAS for te Abolition of Moderation=-
-- @rjamestaylor on Ello
If it had been Seattle instead of Huntsville, they probably would have ended up in Boeing's Surplus store for $0.10/lb or so. I've seen everything from machine tools and empty VCR cases to office equipment (yes, even PC's) to 737 landing gear parts and aluminum beams sold by the pound. No doubt someone simply hauled them away from the landfill for nothing, so Boeing didn't even get the ten cents per pound they could have in Seattle.
Landfil worker to supervisor, "Think we should look around again for them tanks?"
Supervisor, "Nah, don't waste your time lookin', it ain't been found by now, ain't gonna be. Go on and take a break."
Worker with cigarette to supervisor, "Got a light?"
TV News Anchor, "Just minutes ago an explosion ocurred here at the landfil, killing two, others have been injured. Cause as yet is undetermined but there is concern that the lost Oxygen tank may have caused or enhanced the explosion."
"Open code, in other words, can be a check on state power." -Lawrence Lessig
Hi, I'm an orange. How are you, Mr. Orange? I'm fine, Mr. Grape. Shall we go down to the beach? I'd love to, Mr. Grape. First I will put on my trousers. Okay. Let's get a parsnip. Where will we find a parsnip? Let's look in the cave. But there are moles in the cave. Are you scared of moles? Yes. We can play rock-paper-scissors against the moles. Oh, okay. I want some water wings. Oh, do you now? Yes, I do. Well, you can't have them. This makes me a sad panda. You are not a panda, Mr. Grape. Well, I did not know that. Mr. Grape, will put on your trousers, please? I am not Mr. Grape. Yes, Mr. Grape, you are Mr. Grape. Well, I must be leaving now. Why are you leaving? I have a date with Mrs. Raspberry. Oh, do you, now? Yes, I do. But aren't we going to the beach? No, we are not. Why not? Because I have a date with Mrs. Raspberry. Oh, okay. Well, talk to you later. Goodbye, Mr. Grape. I will see you later. Yes, goodbye.
Thanks,
CmdrTaco
They didn't "loose" the tanks. The tanks were placed in an extreemly low geosyncronous orbit in advance of final component assembly.
First, the hardware is being designed for human use in space, so there are an incredible number of specifications it must meet -- and each specification carries with it at least one test, and probably more. The final hardware must be certified as having been tested to each of these specs, and having passed. So a very large part of what's being paid for is the cost of meeting the required specs, and then maintaining the paperwork trail. (It's a common saying in the aerospace industry that you can't fly something until the paperwork weighs more than the vehicle; this is way too conservative for space stuff, though.)
Second, because it's space hardware, NASA is paying for it to be light weight; with each pound orbited by the Shuttle costing between $5K and $10K (depending on how you do the accounting, but I won't go there), time-consuming design work and lightweight-but-expensive construction is cheaper than orbiting a quickly-designed (and overdesigned), heavy version. Added to this is the complication that it is for space use, and there are design considerations you don't face here on earth (things like the zero-gee environment -- you have to stir liquid gasses, because there's no convection -- safety requirements for both on-orbit use and for transport in the Shuttle's cargo bay, and so on). All these add to the cost, too.
Third, the production run on these parts can be counted on the fingers of one hand, probably -- one set for the station, one or two sets of spares, and two or three more sets for testing here on earth. So there's no cost savings from amortizing the upfront engineering costs over a large production; it's all on the handful that are produced. And note that the cost of the ones used in testing is absorbed into the station set and the spares, too -- so they cost something like double what you might expect just from that alone.
Having said all that in defense of the cost, I do have to confess that it probably doesn't cover the entire price quoted in the article. There is no doubt a pretty fair chunk of the cost that exists solely because it's an aerospace contract for NASA; some of this is because they can get away with it, and some is because they have to put up with NASA being a pain in the ass... (I've worked on a number of contracts for NASA; it's hard to charge enough for PITA, because they are pros at it!). If the parts were spec'd, designed and built in-house, for a Boeing-funded project, I suspect they would cost a fraction of the quoted value -- even for the identical application.
And now that you know, I'm going to bet that it doesn't really make you feel all that much better, does it?
---
---
Politics is about making compromises. Religion isn't. --Michael Horton
Some of us would rather carry around large bills than dollar bills and coins. What about us? Shall you to oppress us?
(TM Ion Storm)
You forgot one: I'm an engineer in untsville (not wit Boeing, tank goodness!), so we got the details first-and. Apparently, (or "allegedly", if you prefer), Boeing actually sent workers into te landfill to attempt to recover the parts! Tey found bits and pieces, but noting big enoug to aul back.
In the early days of planning for the ISS, NASA officials were not gaga about the project. However, do you want to piss off Congress?
For those of you who would be inclined to critize NASA for this, I would like to say the following. Don't totally blame NASA. NASA does not really want the ISS. NASA wants cheaper, faster, woops...where did it go? (Sorry, I couldn't resist:-))
Nah man,
LISA was much smarter than the people responsible for this
When I was a little boy I found the most annoy statements where the ones starting with When I Was a Little Boy, dont you
Word missin' there, sonny. Ah, back in my day, I reckon we had to lurn grammer real gun.
This story is three days old: evidence
I'm new to Slashot. Please explain why the post I am replying to was rated as a "Troll." I posted it in all sincerity and I am confused as to why it received a (-1, Troll) score. Thanks!
-nt-
Trolling is highly inappropriate, sir.
Get serious, if any of them had any goddamn money they could do it... big deal. Only the US has the money to undertake such a joke for the hell of it.
These guys don't know WTF they're doing. They send up Galileo with a reactor on board, then guess what? It may endanger Europa which we now think has life in its oceans (bad enough we kill everything on Earth, now we start killing off life elsewhere). So we have to waste Galileo now by crashing it into Jupiter. What a joke!
PU-TAnG!!!!!!
For god's sake, it's only 3/4 of a million dollars worth of parts.
.02 ;)
When I was in the Marine Corps. somone lost a pair of Night Vision Goggles in the field. These were old Army hand-me-downs that were probably only worth a few thousand bucks brand new.
Once they realized they were lost they made the entire company (~250 men) go back out on the weekend and cover about 15 miles of terrain looking for them.
We eventually found them in a muddy-mire by having us all get in a line and going through it on our hands searching.
If these Boeing and NASA Engineers (I'm an engineer now too, BTW) want to piss away my tax money, they should have a seargeant there putting his jungle boot up their ass to find it.
Just my
They didnt "loose" the tanks. The tanks were placed in an extreemly low geosyncronous orbit in advance of final component assembly.
Either that, or they were undergoing performance tests in the field to demonstrate the rigorous construction of the tanks.
Insert mind here.
I think what really happend was the CEO needed some money to pay off his loan shark and dissappeared $750k as lost parts.
Andover.Net, an internet media company which owns the popular "Slash-dot" web site today lost $750,000 in server hardware. CEO Bruce Twizzler was reported as saying "It simply disappeared. One moment it was there then 'Poof!' it's gone". The servers, computers which power the stream of information on the global network known as the Internet, contained an advanced artificial intelligence program known as "Rob Malda". According to Adam Blue, Andover CTO, the program was designed by freshmen in the Hope College Computer Science department as part of an introduction to Microsoft's powerful "Visual Basic" programming language. "Well, we still have 'Hemos' running, though it's not quite as good", he added. Andover, which uses the recently released Windows 2000 operating system to power the Slash-dot site say that they hope to recover the missing servers within the week. "It's just a freak coincidence, really", one staff member was quoted as saying, "We had hoped to open source to Malda program, but hey, it's gone." From ABC News, this is Peter Jennings.
Hope all these problems won't delay the construction of the space station... it will be a safe place for me hide from the clown and finally get some sleep.
Wow...something gets screwed up involving astronauts and space! i'm surprised Lockheed Martin didn't have a hand in this! hehehe
-FluX
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Your Ad Here!
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"It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once." -David Hume
:-P~ ~ ~~C====8 licking it up
Sheesh, those tanks cost a lot!
What the hell is so special. Are they made out of platinum?
I heard this is the place the Boeing workers visited on their way to work.
I have never knowingly done anything wrong!!!
This sig will bend over for a dollar!
...THAT THEY WILL APPEAR ON EBAY FOR HALF PRICE BY THE END OF THE WEEK. ALL THE GOVERNMENTS ARE PUSSIES FOR BUYING NEW WHEN EVERYTHING CAN BE HAD ON EBAY, THE WAL-MART OF THE INTERNET, FOR HALF PRICE OR EVEN LESS. ANY HONEST WOMAN WILL AGREE. IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHO I AM, LOOK AT WWW.HUGEJANUS.ORG ACTUALLY, I AM YOUR NEIGHBOR. GO OUTSIDE AND SCREAM "I AM LOOKING FOR A HUGH JANUS IN MY NEIGHORHOOD" 7 TIMES JUST AFTER MIDNITE AND I WILL COME SEE YOU. OH! CALL THE DOCTOR! MY ASS IS BROKEN! IT HAS A BIG CRACK IN IT.
"What shall we do then?" asked Mr. Zipper. They joined hands, twisted round each other. Long kiss, deep sigh. "Satisfying", he observed. "Yet somehow obscene" said the demure Mr. Greene. Still standing face-to-face, Mr. Zipper allowed his gaze to pass through the wrinkled face of Mr. Greene, still holding tightly, to the space beyond. Suddenly, he lurched backwards, feverish. Mr. Greene fell to his knees beside him, taking the other by his hand. Mr. Zipper's weary, young eyes looked up at him, saw in him a thousand false messiahs, and withdrew from this world. Mr. Greene, it must be said, could feel nothing. Never having been exposed to it, what could he do? Tied to the earth, always coitus, never cogito, he was trapped. With no Mr. Zipper, no other, he died there, thirty silver coins and all, as neatly and poorly as he had lived.
Damn.. and they cut 40% off my salary to waste on
"space program" and alike.. here is how it spent.
90% gets lost or stolen here on earth and the
rest is used to make space station they cant find.
I hate that..:( I work hard and this is what i get..
MOO FUCKAZ
... if they don't do something about all these idiot trolls.
Someone should remind the Slashdot people that they're part of a public company now, responsible to their stockholders.
That you might not have all the details on this? I've seen a lot of posts castigating Boeing for this. Did you stop to think it might be NASA's fault? Or maybe the Redstone Arsenal trash contractor's? This happened at Marshall Space Flight Center, didn't it? So what if it was a part Boeing made. Who put the part outside the building in the first place? We have very few facts, and there are numerous possible explanations for how this could have happened. And no, I do not work for Boeing. I don't even work in Huntsville.
Getting tired of Slashdot... moving to Usenet comp.misc for a while.
At the very least, Boeing didn't double-charge the government.
They could have, y'know? They could have charged the gov't for things that are "needed", no matter if those things were thrown away in the first place or not.
Muchas Gracias, Señor Edward Snowden !
Of course they didn't find the tanks. I got 'em first, and sold them to Fidel Castro. Suck on that, Bill Clinton. hehehehe :)
#define X(x,y) x##y
#define X(x,y) x##y
Peter Cordes ; e-mail: X(peter@cordes ,
About ten years ago I was working for a government "think tank" here in Los Angeles. One afternoon a frantic supervisor yanked me out of my office and, along with a few other fellas, drove us about 1/2 mile down the street to an intersection covered with THOUSANDS of sheets of paper... all SECRET documents!
Seems the messenger between facilities had taken off with a box left on TOP of the van; a few blocks down the road the box fell off and burst into a rain of classified schematics! (I think that particular project had something to do with hypervelocity missiles).
We spent the next half hour frantically snatching up documents-literally ripping them out of curious onlooker's hands. Around the time we finished cleaning up the last of the visible strays, a dark blue sedan pulled up with two Men In Dark Blue- Pentagon security auditors. They ended up pulling the clearance of the van driver (a serious career limiting move) and we suffered from increased ultra-paranoid security in our facility for the next few months.
In the end, 17 individual sheets were unaccounted for, although we received reports of individual sheets washing up on the beach (they had been carried down to the ocean in storm sewers) for the next few months. The more cycnical employees "pshawed" the whole thing... saying "you couldn't find a Russian to buy it off you, they had all that shit six months ago."
Note for non-guvmint types: "Secret" was one of the three levels of classified documents we worked with; "Confidential," "Secret," and "Top Secret." Each individual is cleared to one level, which allows access to documents at that level and below. My classification was "Secret."
Marc Siry || interactive media professional, motorcycle enthusiast ||
I suggest boeing to burn every document regarding their ISO9001 certification, this will liberate some shelf space to put valuable equipment on.
I'm sure they can find them on ebay. Some redneck has probably dug them up and auctioned them off already. Why not? Everything else is up there.
I am that that is, not that that is not, that is.
Do you work for a local TV station or something?
Medicines That Kill When Taken In Extremely Large Doses! Is your family in danger???
Details after this crap about the local fire department...
Search first, ask questions later.
Landfills are something I have great personal experience with as a former designer/inpector (no I'm not kidding).
People invariable come to the landfill looking for something they threw away (wallets, rings..), usually they never find it. If they get there befor the truck they can get the truck dumped out to the side and look.
My favorite was a consered looking woman who showed up at 7 am and wanted to know if any of us had seen a silver box she threw out a week before. No we told her, although she was welcome to look for it.. What was in the box? "An awfull lot of money...." She never found it, and we didn't either.
ooops.
If the crates of space stuff were noticed, they are probably in some landfill workers back yark or were sold for scrap.
CNN needs to start using the "foot" icon for some of their own stories. Or maybe a foot icon as the new Boeing logo?
don't dispair, but you are low on air
we'll be sure to send regrets to your mom.
Something smells fishy with this story; no pun intended.
I wonder how extensive the landfill search was, and how long ago the tanks were "discarded"?
Maybe it's possible that a sanation worker or boeing insider decided to appropriate these tanks! =)
Of course, I haven't a clue what they would be any good for... hmm... what would one do with such a tank... put it in the living room? Y2K bunker maybe? I wonder how big the tanks are?
4 March 2000: Boeing's missing tanks not explosive, Huntsville Times
"Huntsville workers for Boeing accidentally threw away the two $375,000 tanks last month and later found a piece of their protective covering in the Huntsville landfill.
Boeing has said that if the tanks must be replaced, then NASA, not Boeing, must pay for them, due to terms of a contract between the organizations."
By coincidence, this month is "Property Awareness Month" at NASA MSFC ...
Here's the URLs:
The Nasa Watch site
Boeing's missing tanks not explosive
Pay for the snafu
Space Station parts go in trash
Workers Seek Space Station Parts
>If these Boeing and NASA Engineers (I'm an
>engineer now too, BTW) want to piss away my tax
>money, they should have a seargeant there
>putting his jungle boot up their ass to find it.
How exactly do you piss huge LOX canisters up your own butt-hole? And what hope has any sergeant alive got of extracting them with a jungle boot? Sorry, I know you might not find this funny, but I just love the sick images your statement conjured up.
"What is freedom of expression? Without the freedom to offend, it ceases to exist." Salman Rushdie
The rumour going around here regarding the Mars polar lander is that it got to within 1 foot of the ground just fine. There was supposed to be a cutoff switch built into each of the 3 legs that automatically killed the retro rockets upon contact with the ground, but during the software design phase someone accidentally disabled the cutoff switch. The rockets kept firing . . . the lander kept trying to `fly' while sitting on the ground . . . it kicked up a huge cloud of dirt (thus incapacitating itself with dust), or maybe skidded along the ground until it flipped over.
Nothing on the space station is very new, technologically. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt . . . now let's stop pissing around in low earth orbit and do something useful in space.
What would be useful? How about
Well mister ninja, you may have temporarily set back Boeing's plans, but did you know that those missing tanks were actually MAPLE SYRUP tanks, destined for use in the Maple syrup Pancake Logistics Module (MPLM)?
The MPLM is a sophisticated pressurised pancake container built by the Alenia Company in Italy. It's true! They are building three of them and naming them Leonardo, Raphael, and Donatello. (I dunno what happened to Michaelangelo).
Silly Italians think they're named after famous artists, but we PANCAKE engineers know that they're really NINJA TURTLES! Can you dig it?!
Boeing junks two pieces of perfectly good equipment, and NASA (and by extension you and I (assuming you're a US citizen, like me (sorry to nest parentheses))) has to foot the bill!? So Boeing can MAKE MONEY off of tossing stuff out?
I can see it now "Uh... hi, remember that space shuttle, I think it was called Atlantis? Well, funny thing, it got hauled away as garbage and we can't find it... so, will you be paying for a new one by check, or just expensing it?"
Damn, why can I ever get involved in contracts where the other guy pays for our stupidity. Oh wait, that's what for-pay tech support is for...
Considering the policies of some landfills, they probably had to pay by the pound to get rid of them.
That said, there ARE other reasons for these to be so expensive. When something is in space, it is subject to a harsh environment completely different than what a gas grill tank is. There is radiation, pressure (or lack thereof), temperature extremes, and major reliability needs.
There are other costs that are coupled into the $750,000. R&D is a major section of this. This involves the 20 engineers designing it and the 400 managers who sat in meetings for a year to come up with the acronym ;)
Another cost is in the manufacturing: tooling, machining, building, etc. After a few are built (prototypes, test subjects, etc) they have to be certified for space and this costs A LOT.
"Space Certification" for a CPU is on the order of $1 million. This is a reason why almost all of the CPUs on the Space Station are 386's instead of PIII 800's.
IANAL, but I play one on
Editor's note: word is spreading fast at NASA MSFC that Boeing may have actually sold the two ISS tanks at a surplus property sale for $50. The tanks cost NASA $750,000.
Stay tuned.
Some information about these tanks from a guy who works in the building they were lost from.
First of all, what were these tanks? The space station uses an oxygen/nitrogen atmosphere that approximates sea level composition, without the 1% argon and trace elements. As the crew breathes and uses up oxygen, the Carbon Dioxide Removal Assembly scavenges the CO2 and dumps it overboard. The oxygen tank provide the replacement O2 to make up what is lost. The space station modules have many cables and pipes that go through the walls of the modules, and the modules are bolted to each other. There is a certain amount of leakage at these points (on the order of a pound a day). Since the station atmosphere is 80% nitrogen, you need to replace that too.
You need to play with the composition of the atmosphere in the airlock to prepare for a spacewalk (reduce dissolved nitrogen in the blood to prevent the bends), and also to refill the spacesuit tanks afterwards. For this reason these tanks are mounted on the outside of the Airlock module, which is still under construction here in Huntsville.
There are up to three tanksets that can be mounted on the airlock at any one time, each tankset consisting of two pressure tanks, the 'doghouse'
that covers them and provides insulation and protection from space debris, and the structural mountings, plumbing, valves, and wiring. It's not clear to me what exactly was lost, but from the size of the box it was likely one tankset, which is about 3x3x4 feet in size. There are something like 8-10 total tanksets in existence, since full ones would be brought up to replace the ones on orbit that were empty, plus spares for 10 years of operation.
Why do they cost $750,000? Boeing and it's subcontractors spend about $45,000 a pound to design airplanes or space stations. Pound for pound they cost the same to develop, because it's the same guys following the same design standards, using the same type of CAD workstations, etc. And the airplanes sell for $600 a pound. So assume the tankset weighs 300 pounds (I haven't looked up the weight, that's an educated guess based on the size). So the total design cost would have been $13.5 million spread over 10 units, or $1.35 million per unit, plus a manufacturing cost of $180,000 per unit. The quoted cost of $750,000 is less than this because the tankset is simpler than average for the station or an airplance as a whole , being mostly structure rather than a mix of structure and active components like computers and life support systems.
How did they get thrown out? Most likely (I have no official information to go on) sloppy inventory tracking and labeling. I'm pretty sure someone didn't walk out with them, since the storage yard outside the building is behind two barbed wire fences, and with crate you are talking about a 500 pound item. Most of the US portion of the Space Station is being assembled in this building, and crates of components are arriving all the time. A trash contractor periodically picks up dumpsters full of packing materials and the empty crates, and I suspect the screwup was something like parking a full crate over by the empty crate pile, and no one bothered to check to see if it was really empty. The overall impact to the program isn't so bad, since you effectively have lost one of your spare units (you have 9 now instead of 10), and they will simply produce a replacement.
They'll definitely never find the missing pieces. Just a few more parts, a couple thousand gallons of LOX, and BANG- I'm off this rock! Sure ended up being a lot cheaper than I planned. All I've gotta do then is find those moon maidens, or space amazons...~ ~~~~~~~
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Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?
Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?
Guess which wrote this...
at the dump was stupid. I guess this will show them!
..and we've all seen the videos where an F-14 fails to take off from a carrier, crashing into the ocean beyond the runway. $40 million a pop makes $750,000 fluke look pretty insignificant.
Judging from the media attention this has garnered, I don't think NASA has a habit of throwing away million-dollar toys. Except for the Mars Lander...
License: By reading this you are agreeing that you agree with me.
Friend, Boeing is a private company that picks up government contracts occasionally. So is Whistler, the company that makes radar detectors but on the side supplied some components for the F-4. Amtrak is a government company. Get it straight.
I wish there was a choice that said "Factually Wrong -1" when I mod.
No offense at all.. but it might be time for a new keyboard.. looks like you're missing some "h"'s!