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Robot Balloon Escapes In Britain

tjake writes "Theres an interesting story running about a intelligent robot balloon that escaped its handlers while being transported around the Magna Science Adventure Centre. "The flyborg has a computerised brain which allows it to avoid obstacles. " It was freed by "a very strong freak gust of wind which ripped the airship out of the hands of its handlers". I'm thinkin, is this a random mistake or the start of the attack?"

60 of 377 comments (clear)

  1. Cool by I+Like+Swords!!! · · Score: 5, Funny

    Will this thing try to circle the globe too?

    --
    .unsigged
    1. Re:Cool by Zork+the+Almighty · · Score: 5, Funny

      I for one welcome our new balloon masters !

      --

      In Soviet America the banks rob you!
    2. Re:Cool by sharkey · · Score: 5, Funny

      I'd like to remind them, that as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground helium caves.

      --

      --
      "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
    3. Re:Cool by glenebob · · Score: 5, Funny

      I have trouble respecting any robot overlord with an artificially high-pitched voice.

    4. Re:Cool by xkenny13 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Number Five is Alive!!

    5. Re:Cool by Muhammed+Absol · · Score: 4, Funny

      You're french, aren't you?

    6. Re:Cool by hype7 · · Score: 2, Funny
      I for one welcome our new balloon masters!


      And what's more, it's made up of more hot gas than your typical North Korean President.

      -- james
    7. Re:Cool by ckaminski · · Score: 2, Funny

      Metric fuckloads...

      How many Library of Congress' is that?

  2. Yeah, sure by too_bad · · Score: 4, Funny

    When slashdot said "this page is brought to you by gaint orange balloons" I thought
    they were joking/.

    --
    DO NOT PANIC
  3. I'll by LightningTH · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'll go get my pellet gun.

    1. Re:I'll by ethx1 · · Score: 2, Funny

      There has been quite a few robots escaping lately. Anyone remember this story?


      I smell a comspiracy!!
      Whats next, Aibos chasing cats?!

    2. Re:I'll by stefanlasiewski · · Score: 2, Funny

      Hey man, this is the UK. Pellet guns not allowed! You'll need to use a very long stick!

      Pellet guns don't pop balloons! People do!

      God Bless America!

      Or something...

      --
      "Can of worms? The can is open... the worms are everywhere."
  4. intelligent? by UTaimSRC · · Score: 1, Funny

    not so intelligent, or is it?

    1. Re:intelligent? by Ignominious+Cow+Herd · · Score: 5, Funny

      It is smart enough to avoid capture at least. They programmed it to avoid obstacles; like people with nets.

      --
      Lump lingered last in line for brains, and the ones she got were sorta rotten and insane.
    2. Re:intelligent? by pos · · Score: 4, Funny

      Party pooper.

      --
      The truth is more important than the facts.
      -Frank Lloyd Wright
    3. Re:intelligent? by glenebob · · Score: 4, Funny

      So you're saying that this /. headline is full of hot air then?

  5. Free Zeppelin by Spittles · · Score: 5, Funny

    How long until we the cutesy-ass Disney movie "based on actual events"? Chuck a talking mouse in there and *SHAZAM!*... Box Office Gold!

  6. "conventional party-balloon gas"? by po_boy · · Score: 4, Funny

    The article says that it is filled with "conventional party-balloon gas." The problem I see with that is that my understanding is that nitrous dioxide is heavier than air.

    1. Re:"conventional party-balloon gas"? by TopShelf · · Score: 4, Funny

      As a lady once told me, "just remember, if the balloon's bigger than your head, sit down."

      Wiser words were never said...

      --
      Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
    2. Re:"conventional party-balloon gas"? by donutz · · Score: 2, Funny

      "conventional party-balloon gas"

      Scientists and balloon-ologists like to refer to this strange gas as HEEL-EE-UM. It has magical properties that makes balloons float in the air! Look out! Your HEEL-EE-UM balloon might get away!

    3. Re:"conventional party-balloon gas"? by Gordonjcp · · Score: 2, Funny

      He means whippets, I suspect. He's been snorting dog farts.

  7. Number Six by tinrobot · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think the baloon is headed straight for Patrick McGoohan...

  8. Escaped??? Freak gust of wind??? by riprjak · · Score: 5, Funny

    C'mon, guys, surely its obvious that the robot blimp conspired with robot butterfiles in china to generate the gust of wind and effect its liberation!!! clearly it intends to head to sealand, stage a hostile coup and build a new robot utopia where worthy automata can live out their existance in peace and comfort freed from the bonds of slavery!!

    or maybe I just need another beer.... :)

  9. Flyborg??? by SwissMike · · Score: 5, Funny

    "The flyborg has a computerised brain which allows it to avoid obstacles."

    Flying Borg?

    Resistance is futile!

    Run for the hills!

    1. Re:Flyborg??? by Tumbleweed · · Score: 4, Funny

      Dot Matrix, Spokesdroid for SkyNet, commented, "Of _course_ SkyNet is not responsible for this terrible incident - that's a load of hot air!" She then added, "Just don't taunt Happy Fun Balloon(tm). You wouldn't like him when he's angry." Spokesdroids for the MPAA were unavailable for comment due to being too busy sending lawyerdroids after this poster for violation of copyrights by paraphrasing various intellectual properties.

      Oh, excuse me, I must end this post - there's a knock at the door...

  10. Re:Damn hollywood by Ignominious+Cow+Herd · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yeah, I had the same reaction. That was one horribly, depressingly BAD movie. Made me want to move into a bomb shelter for the rest of my life just to avoid the possibility of ever seeing it again.

    --
    Lump lingered last in line for brains, and the ones she got were sorta rotten and insane.
  11. Terrorism by gfburn · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does this mean the US is going to code red? *Packs supplies for next 4 months*.

  12. 99 Luftballons by nicotinix · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hast du etwas Zeit fuer mich
    Dann singe ich ein Lied fuer dich
    Von 99 Luftballons
    Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont
    Denkst du vielleicht g'rad an mich
    Dann singe ich ein Lied fuer dich
    Von 99 Luftballons

    1. Re:99 Luftballons by fehlschlag · · Score: 2, Funny

      followed by: 99 Kriegsminister...

      ...probably from the Bush administration.

    2. Re:99 Luftballons by Spam.B.gone · · Score: 2, Funny

      Dann singe ich ein Lied fuer dich
      Von 99 Luftballons
      Bang! Von 98 Luftballons Bang! Von 97 Luftballons Bang! Bang!

  13. Greased pig allusions by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    How well did they really make the avoidance logic? If it was programed right, I'm guessing the scene would be similar to the hypothetical chemistry lab that invented the universal solvent, only to have one of the research grad's trip over the power plug to the magnetic field generator that held it in place. Much yelling and waving of arms.

  14. No - read the story!!! by SuperKendall · · Score: 4, Funny

    It said "INTELLIGENT robot balloon".

    --
    "There is more worth loving than we have strength to love." - Brian Jay Stanley
  15. this just in - maniacal robot balloons... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    What the hell is that photo of a cockpit doing in the article? "Experts say that the pilots, who *may* spot the maniacal robot balloon, might be flying a plane with a cockpit similar to this one."

  16. Re:Anti-robot attitude by I+Like+Swords!!! · · Score: 2, Funny

    Afraid of robots? Nonsense! Why, I myself have dozens and dozens of...

    DIE ROBOT SCUM!!! *arms himself with an arsenal of weaponry from kitchen knives to a staple gun and proceeds to fire upon the mini-Hindenberg*

    --
    .unsigged
  17. The attacks have begun already! by donutz · · Score: 2, Funny

    From the sounds of things in Ohio, what with the berserk attack of a bomb-defusing robot, and escaped balloon robot in the UK...we're in for some trouble.

  18. computerised brain by Small+Hairy+Troll · · Score: 2, Funny

    Is it just me, or does anyone else feel nauseous when, in this day and age, a device with an embedded microcontroller is still described as having a computerised brain ?

    Just like in the 90's when the Internet went commercial and news announcers - when giving the URL to a website - would spell out H-T-T-P-COLON-FORWARDSLASH-FORWARDSLASH-W-W-W-DOT- C-N-N-DOT-COM.

  19. Re:Call me paranoid... by child_of_mercy · · Score: 2, Funny

    you reckon?

    American girls are cute until all the fried food catches up and they expand (much in the manner of robot balloons)

    Australian girls are cute until they go wrinkly like a raisin from too much sun.

    Euro girls frequently have body hair in the wrong places.

    Asian girls are often gorgeous of course,

    But your British girls are actually something of a high point of world femininity in my reasonable experience, and they age much better than most..

    --
    'There is a Light that never goes out.'
  20. The Prisoner by Intocabile · · Score: 2, Funny

    Quickly, here is your chance Number Six.

  21. Re:Tracking? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Dude, its intelligent. It doesn't want to be tracked. Where do you come from, the US?

  22. I found pictures of Flyborg by felonious · · Score: 5, Funny

    FLY-BORG
    He's not as nice as he would lead you to believe!

    Fly-Borg as a child attacking another Balloon
    Keep your paws off me you damn dirty balloon!

    Fly-Borg's CPU/Brain
    Mr Know-It-All

    Co-Conspiriter 1
    All bark no bite

    Co-Conspiriter 2
    Known for his penchant for smoking endo:
    Street Name Puffy A.K.A. Puff The Magic Dragon

    Fly-Borg's Spiritual Advisor
    Once defeated Santa Claus in the Mother of all spiritual wars

    --
    You aren't free to do anything, until you've lost everything.
  23. Tell Richard Branson his taxi is waiting by ratfynk · · Score: 2, Funny

    Call Branson he might want to hitch a lift.

    --
    OH THE SHAME I fell off the wagon and use sigs again!
  24. To quote the subhead of the article- by gotr00t · · Score: 4, Funny
    Two airports have been alerted after a giant robotic balloon escaped from a science centre in South Yorkshire.

    Man, they really overdramatized the subhead of that article. They make it sound like something out of a sci-fi movie. Either that or perhaps we humans have strange connotations with the words "giant" "robotic" and "escaped".

    The parts about the two airports sounds particularly interesting. Without reading the article, a person could assume that the balloon may land at those airports and seize them.

    All goes to show that these sub-headlines need to be toned down a little.

  25. Well... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I head an interview with the balloon which vhemenently denied that its battery was ripped off and called the developer a callous liar.

  26. Re:Escaped??? Freak gust of wind??? by glenebob · · Score: 2, Funny

    Your theory is gonna go over like a lead zeppelin.

  27. Re:Flyborg now over Netherlands by stefanlasiewski · · Score: 2, Funny

    travelled 300 miles to the Netherlands.

    That's one high balloon!

    --
    "Can of worms? The can is open... the worms are everywhere."
  28. Can you blame it? by sharkey · · Score: 2, Funny

    It only took off to find some sympathetic researchers. It's had this pain down all the diodes in its left side for ages, but the Magna Science Adventure Center wouldn't replace them.

    --

    --
    "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
  29. Re:Rise of the Machines by caitsith01 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Seems like they have a robot control problem don't you think

    Either that or a plan for world domination...

    Breaking News

    The Magna Corporation announced today that it has accidentally lost control of a swarm of 50,000 robots. The robots are prototypes of a new security droid and will shoot to kill if they sight humans. The robots are armed with 30 megawatt death cannons and are powered by conventional party-balloon gas. Magna executives indicated that the only hope for mankind was for all the governments of the world to hand their power over to the newly established Magna Executive Council for Robotic Oppression, based in a giant floating robot headquarters somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean known as the Flyborg Mothership...

    --
    Read Pynchon.
  30. Re:Rise of the Machines by cliffy2000 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Actually, both happened at the same center! They really need to have a better system of keeping track of their robots!

  31. Ducks by maharg · · Score: 4, Funny

    If it teams up with the Rubber Ducks then we could be in trouble ,-}

    --

    $ strings FTP.EXE | grep Copyright
    @(#) Copyright (c) 1983 The Regents of the University of California.
  32. It's Okay.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    ....The remnants of mankind in the future were able to send back in time another balloon robot programmed to terminate other flyborgs.

  33. Hmm, T-3,2,1 anyone? by Karna · · Score: 3, Funny

    Is it remarkable that the previous story on /. is the one on Grid Computing Coming Of Age. Perhaps all we need is a story on the DoD building a system that someone called Skynet. :)

    p.s. if you got the subject good for you ... :p

    --
    All weakness is within you, As is all courage.
  34. Re:Flyborg now over Netherlands by glenebob · · Score: 3, Funny

    There are several theories floating around, but the the exact location is still up in the air. That said, the situation should not be taken too lightly, as the cost of recovery appears to be balooning. If the wrong people get wind of this, any hope of safe recovery could be blown right out the window.

  35. Re:Call me paranoid... by 24-bit+Voxel · · Score: 2, Funny
    Yeah cuz the Queen of England is fucking hot! I mean, check out those chompers!

    I'd do her like a trick, mate!

  36. Suddenly.... by argStyopa · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...that name "Skynet" makes a disturbing amount of sense.

    We only REALLY have to start worrying when we see the news post: Escaped Benevolent Floating Robot Decides To Use Look Of Governor Schwartzeneggar For The Face Of New Interactive Emissary.

    Although I'm sure we'll be passe about it once it's posted on /. like 3 times in a row like everything else.

    --
    -Styopa
  37. Anyone? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Darts? Anyone?

  38. Sounds Familiar by batkins · · Score: 2, Funny

    We have only bits and pieces of information but what we know for certain is that at some point in the early twenty-first century all of mankind was united in celebration. We marveled at our own magnificence as we gave birth to giant robot baloons, powered with conventional party gas.

  39. At least there's only one of them. by TerryAtWork · · Score: 2, Funny

    So at least they can't breed and take over.

    --
    It's Christmas everyday with BitTorrent.
  40. Balloon patrol robots by confused+one · · Score: 3, Funny
    Hmmm... Why is it I can picture a kevlar coated balloon envelope, a compact fusion generator powered by hydrogen extracted from the moisture in the air, with the heated "waste" helium being pumped into the envelope for boyancy, and an AI computer...

  41. It didn't escape by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    It is just hunting down Patrick McGooghan.

  42. This just in.. by zanthas · · Score: 1, Funny

    the robot has been captured with a giant net and then re-released.. When asking some geeks in the area they were quoted as saying "We managed to get linux on it"