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Iceman Otzi was a Fighter
Theatetus writes "Yahoo! News is running a story from USA Today that Otzi the iceman's murder is more complicated than we thought. It seems Otzi had blood on his clothes and knife from four different people in patterns that suggested he took out two with his bow and carried a wounded or dead person over his shoulder. I sense an action movie in the making..." If you don't remember Otzi, read the original story.
I tried to read the article, but I didn't understand it.
Because I'm just a cave man!
Ah, Phil, we barely knew ye...
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... The Straight Dope
I can see it now! It's got action! It's got Drama! It's got this hot, sexy half-naked female co-star! Throw in some young stud like Vin Deisel as Otzi, and we've got a surefire winner!
Alright, who's with me to bid on the movie rights?
Karma Whoring for Fun and Profit.
He's a distant ancestor of John Oconnor.
All Troll + "offtopic" mods are meta moderated as "Unfair", because you abused the system.
With all the DNA tech we have now, we can make an arrest, right?
The coolest voice ever.
Since this murder case is still open, I suggest we get together and frame Darl McPrisonBride for it.
because he was telling copyright fire side stories.
bronze age riaa
"And they were killed in the manner best befitting virgins" ---- "He's dead Jim"
"We deal in lead" - Roland of Gilead
with his leathered 5000 yr old skin, his bronze axe, knife, quiver, his grass cloak (usually worn by heardsmen until the last century) and series of wounds (did I mention self-ritualized death?).. Otzi reminds us that life in the alps is cold, dangerous, and just not worth it. (for it, see *MURDER*)
btw.. i think it's great that they used the pollen (which various form found are only released in Autumn) to figure out what things were like when he died. Harsh, autumn is in the alps.. he was fighting many men for days at a time in dead brutal conditions.. RAD.. go otzi
p
** "It's not my job to stand between the people talking to me, and the ones listening to me." -- Pego the Jerk
or, to tie in to a previous story, perhaps Otzi is a chimera?
Tanking is a bitch.
But at least that's better than going off looking for a Yeti!
+5, Female
He had blood on his back from one person, and blood on his knife from two more. So the theory is he carried a wounded friend, and fought two assailants. His own DNA set is included in the count of 4. I saw the first discovery show they did on him, was pretty neat. Looking forward to the next one.
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-- Fighting mediocrity one bad post at a time.
Next they'll tell us he was actually from the year 1865 sent back in time 5000 years to protect a hot, but dumpy looking cave-chick from the Steam powered Terminator sent from the same future to kill her before she fathered the distant ancestor of Rudolf Diesel...
The Rock will portray Otzi in the movie...
My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle...
he could have been a bandit that tried to rob the wrong people. Didn't they find him in a pass? Perfect place to ambush some travelers.
you can tell from how well the bruises on his hips were healed.. among other injuries, and also, he died slowly.. he ritualistically placed a few items in a pattern below his chest.. they remained there perfectly until he was moved for study
p
** "It's not my job to stand between the people talking to me, and the ones listening to me." -- Pego the Jerk
Whatever! Sounds to me like he had smacked his would-be wife over the head with a club, and was about to drag her back to his cave, when three ninjas jummped out from behind a rock and started freeking out. Sadly ninjas live the life of the sword, and came to a fitting end. Even if this sword was just a pointy knife.
-makoffee
...you are an archeologist and would like a good cry.
It's a bit boring and slow at times, but overall pretty interesting. The most memorable piece of the book describes hikers and local police/government types hacking at the ice and mud that Otzi was frozen in, irreparably damaging the corpse...breaking the bow (& arrows) in half by snapping it off in the ice when trying to pry it out of the frozen muck. The initial discover of Otzi was nothing less than a tragedy for science.
The book also discusses in detail all the political BS that went along with the discovery...whether he was found in Italy or Austria and who really "owned" Otzi. One big mess, really...
Soon, SCO jokes will be treated with the same loathing as "All your base", "In Soviet Russia", and "Imagine a beowolf of..."
no comment
Also, note that his name wasn't Otzi, and that the introduction of the knife aspect causes us to re-examine previously ruled out suspects.
Maybe he should run for Governor of California.
* rimshot
Just raise the taxes on crack.
He's a distant ancestor of John Oconnor.
In the all-Irish universe where O'Dyson builds O'SKYNET and unwittingly unleashes the O'Terminators?
"I'll be back, ye swags!"
The coolest voice ever.
simple story... he is a fighter...
Conclusion: He failed his last saving throw.
I only look human.
My mother is a halfling and my dad is an ogre, so that makes me an Ogreling
... and what level?
4?
5?
Gashes, arrow wounds, wow, he definitely had more than 10hp!
Nice Fortitude saves, too
[Error 407: No signature found]
Yeah, Otzi was a fighter. So was SCO. Let's just hope that SCO also winds up stabbed, dead, and frozen in the cold alpine mountains.
Is it any surprise that we're all so bored at work. Yes it's busy and I have to work hard. But it feels completely pointless. Obviously it's because I haven't had to fight anyone to the death lately. Really, If we evolved from these people and they evolved to fight for their lives most of the time what is happening now that we don't use any of these skills. My last meal took fighting it out of the plastic bag into the microwave. I actually got mad that I had to wash a fork to eat it. Excellent use of those skills that took hundreds of generations to develop.
Scientists discover 5,300 year old, mumified, Italian badass.
Next season on NBC:
Law and Order: Special Caveman Unit
Presumably because the statute of limitations for murdering a neanderthal is 5,301 years.
Come on, he has a knife and a bow, is dressed in leather armor, so he must be a RANGER!
Mode (3) smart-aleck mode. Press * to return to main menu.
Yeah I know, "not a neanderthal at all", but I couldn't resist the alliteration.
"Otzi" is a nice cute name. Maybe if they'd named him something like "Shiv" or "Kane" people's imaginations wouldn't bestow such benevolent traits upon him automatically.
Maybe he was a cannibal, who was carrying someone he killed back to his lair to consume, when he was attacked by the brothers of his victim, who were intent upon ending his rein of terror over the local populace.
Or maybe I'm a cynic. Heh.
I must say that I find the theory that he caried a wounded friend a bit far fetched. The blood on his back may just as well have come from another attacker. Otzi may himself have been the one who wounded that man, or the man may have accidently wounded himself before or during the fight (e.g. by somehow hitting the rocks), or he may have been wounded by the mysterious friend of Otzi, or ...
While we're at it, for instance, let's speculate that Otzi simply found "his" cape after it had been lost by one of several other man who were indeed having a fight, but who never ever saw Otzi. It's improbable, but not impossible.
Remember that there are just about as many theories about what he was doing up there and how he died as there are (groups of) people who looked into it all.
Linux user since early January 1992.
It's interesting how people automatically assume he was some explorer, a hero of his time.
Dig
It had Brendan Fraser doing a reenactment of the Iceman getting trapped.
--
"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
Otsi J. was seen driving away in a white Ford Flinstonemobile.
Due to the lack of the correct Umlaut character in english, you made his name "Otzi".
In fact its "Oetzi", or with the correct Umlaut its "Otzi" (an O with two dots on top)
The name comes from the area "Oetztal" where he was found.
Too bad he didnt carry his ID, maybe his real name is Larry or so.
I can just imagine the ancient food advertisement: "Got Crotch?"
They'll discover that he actually had *three* arrows in him, and a cloven horn by his side. Turns out that jerk Aragorn didn't put Boromir in a boat after all.
With reasonable men I will reason; with humane men I will plead; but to tyrants I will give no quarter. -- William Lloyd
we see what we want to. And what we want are heroes, not villians. Given an unknown, we want that unknown to be Vin Diesel fighting the good fight, not Ted Bundy making of with a co-ed.
He put his boots up on the table and made a face. "The sig," he smirked. "You can waste your life in search of the sig."
If he was murdered, why didn't the murderers take his knife, axe, etc? Surely these would have been valuable commodities back then. Why would they have been left with the body?
Proverbs 21:19