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SCO Run-Time Licenses: Get 'em While They're Hot!
ddtstudio writes "Well, if you've been holding off your payments to SCO for your Linux usage, eWeek reports that you need wait no longer. SCO has now made available for your IP pleasure their run-time licenses -- that is, if you can get one. Seems there are some problems getting even sales people at SCO to answer the phone. Is this any way to run a business?"
what to point darlmcbride.com to next...?
answers on a postcard..
Seems like an appropriate title.. Thieving bastards...
-B
It must be like using the gtk file dialog, except with acid in your eyes!
When is the business world gonna wake up and *SMACK* SCO so I can cover my short positions? Frickin' knew I shoulda bought at $10, instead I placed my faith in justice and shorted them... Oh well, at least I can add my name to the list of those screwed by SCO ;-)
Think outside the... Hey, where'd the friggin' box go?
The reason you can't get through to the sales staff is because they're too busy operating their huge laser on the SCO death star.
As a businessman with a lot at stake for the various companies I have responibility for, I'll be carefully considering whether I should buy one of these licences. I know that won't be a popular position here, but I have to be practical about this.
Of course, I haven't dicussed any of this with anyone at SCO so far, so I don't know yet how good a case they have.
The real Ralph Yarro posts as Anonymous Coward. Anyone else is an impostor.
Is this any way to run a business?
Therein lies the key. Since when did it become a business? I thought the consensus had pretty much realized by now this was a Pump-And-Dump scheme?
"PC Load Letter? What the $@#% does that mean?!"
"SCO also wants customers to be aware that the license is a binary, run-time-only license"
I'm sorry but having to search the web for vb300.dll or whatever was so 1990's.
SCO is on the run now, that's why its called Run-Time
New year Resolution: Don't change sig this year
NOBODY expects the SCO License Audit! Our chief weapon is suprise... surprise and fear... fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise... and a littany of grandiose claims in press releases.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and grandiose claims... and an almost fanatical devotion to the UNIX license.... Our *four*... no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry... are such diverse elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again. (Exit and exeunt)
I think I'll wait until the next minor release of the license once it's more stable.
This is SCO's idea of the travelling salesman problem?
Quoth the article:
...and the other 600 were /. users DDoSing the phone network in Utah. Great job guys!
SCO got more than 900 calls the first week after announcing the licensing program, Stowell said. Of those, 300 were serious inquiries that could immediately be followed up on...
a run-time license that lets buyers use the company's intellectual property that is contained in Linux distributions
In other words, a zero-length file...
Oh wait, my mistake; there are millions of lines of SCO code in Linux. Entire programs, even.
The problem is with the magic-8-ball they use to make decisions and decide on business models. Right now it's "try again later" function is in an endless loop. Don't worry, someone will come along and reboot it soon (shake shake shake) and it will be back to "no", "maybe", and "file a lawsuit."
Crisco, too.
They say the first thing to go is your penis. Well, it's either that or your brain. I forget which...
SCO Director Blake Stowell said the company is willing to negotiate pricing
Here in America we don't negotiate with terrorists.
Someone you trust is one of us.
We will give you a license to run this code we fail to identify. It's not a license to all unix code but only the code we claim is in linux kernels 2.4 and 2.5, and it's a binary only license but we don't actually compile it, someone else does. We won't actually tell you what you are paying for, and what you may not modify or contribute to. You are just going to have to trust us.
Well... I think it's only approperate to respond in binary... Enclosed is a hex represnation so in order to bypass the lameness filter
46 55 43 4B 20 5A 4F 55 21 21 21
There is no sanctuary. There is no sanctuary. SHUT UP! There is no shut up. There is no shut up.
Seems there are some problems getting even sales people at SCO to answer the phone
What does a litigation company need with sales people?
The last thing we need is a bunch of RIAA clones, flooding the network with worthless files.
Litigious bastards
SCO got more than 900 calls the first week after announcing the licensing program, Stowell said. Of those, 300 were serious inquiries that could immediately be followed up on
Man, I'd *love* to hear recordings of those other 600 calls!
2003-07-01 03:36:56 Is this SCO? Yeah, hi. I think I have SCO intellectual property up in my ass. Do you want me to send you the toilet paper tomorrow after I wipe for verification, or should I just go ahead and buy the license? Is that per cheek or can we cover both with one? Hello?
2003-07-24 09:45:22 Can I talk to Darl McBride? My name is Darryl Smith and I'm pretty sure that Darl is an unauthorized derivative work on my name which I own the copyright on. Sure I do! Yeah, I need to talk to him right now he owes me a license? What? Okay I'll call back every five minutes until he comes in.
2003-07-25 10:25:02 Hello, SCO? This is Bill. Crazy busy right now but I wanted to let you know, you guys are doing great! Keep up the good work. I'll be sending some suggestions and money next week.
I will happily pay SCO $699 for a copy of the list of THOSE 300 customers! Seems like a good investment ;-)
By reading this sig, you agree to the terms of my sig license.
goatse.cx ?
Slackware, what else when it must be secure, stable, and easy?
Beat the rush! Get yours now while there are still some left!
Just tear off as much as you need, sign it (in brown), then mail it to SCO using the appropriate recepticle..
(You'll know what to do!)
10 acres of that premium land in Queensland for $200 an acre and a first class seat on the Scientologists spaceship.
After the spaceship arrives...
To know that you know what you know, and that you do not know what you do not know, that is true wisdom. --Scooby Doo
This headlines are getting boring. I have some sugestions:
SCO to Sue God
Darl McBride Caught in Bizarre Love Triangle With Bill Gates, Penguin
Darl McBride to Rename Self Darth McBride, Builds Death Star
SCO Accidentally Sues Self For 10 Billion
Local Man Wonders What Is This SCO Shit
SCO Enters Partnership With Gorzo the Mighty (subtitle: New Corporate Motto: "Seize Him!")
Infinite Number of Monkeys Write UNIX, Sued by SCO
Dear RIAA,
It has come to our attention that D McBride is using this SCO product to build file sharing technolgy at a mega level. He has secretly assembled a complete catalog of some 472,000 songs that he will offer via his web site.
Dear SCO,
It has come to our attention that Capitol Records is using 4500 copies of Linux to run their offices with.
This is my sig.
If I only have one foot, am I exempt, since I am not using your SMP code???
try this handy script in case they actually answer the phone ;)
SCO Slave: "Hello, Thank you for calling SCO, owner of %110 of Linux sources, how may I own^H^H^Hhelp you today?"
You: "Yes, I was considering going for a walk, and I was curious if you own my legs."
SCO Slave: "Why yes we do, we own your right leg. You're required to sign up for our $50,000 right-leg usage license."
You: "Alright, so, after I pay for my leg, I'll be able to do what?"
SCO Slave: "oh, you'll be able to go for a walk, and continue using your legs like you used to."
You: "Legs? I thought you said my right leg."
SCO Slave: "Of course not, we own both your legs, and as I said before, the license fee is $70,000."
You: "But I grew these legs myself!"
SCO Slave: "Our research has determined that your legs contain parts stolen from our leg product"
You: "What?"
SCO Slave: "Your legs contain our patented 10-Toe module, as well as the version 3 rotating ankle."
You: "Alright, so if I pay $70,000 for the use of my legs, you'll leave me alone."
SCO Slave: "That's right, $100,000 for the use of your legs and torso."
To find out how the story ends, call them yourself, and share you results!
Klowner
Hot indeed....with all the torching, it's gotta be hot.
MoFoQ grabs some more pitchforks and flaming torches from a local Pitchforks and Things.
DUH! Dude, this comment was so insightful! I think just shit my pants!