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Googling For Prospective Date Unmasks Fugitive

Posted by simoniker on from the a-different-name-would-be-good dept.

pgrote writes "So you're a guy on the run - you decide to switch towns, put down some roots and start dating again. But if your special new friend happens to be someone who checks her potential dates by searching on Google, you're in trouble. Seems that LaShawn Pettus-Brown was caught by his date's discovery of him on an FBI site of fugitives, even after local Cincinnati news media couldn't find him. Score one for the Internet."

56 of 381 comments (clear)

  1. phew!!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

    Wow. That's even worse than finding your wifes picture on a dating site!!!

  2. What if she finds out... by nmoog · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...that I post to slashdot. Oh dear.

    1. Re:What if she finds out... by TiggsPanther · · Score: 2, Funny

      Well, chances are that unless she, herlelf, is a geek, she won't know what slashdot is.

      Then again, you might get the "Oh so you're the guy I modded '-1 offtopic' last week" treatment.

      Tiggs
      --
      Tiggs
      "120 chars should be enough for everyone..."
  3. rofl! by f13nd · · Score: 5, Funny

    owned by a geek-chick

    --
    www.necroticobsession.com
  4. In Cincinnati... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0, Funny

    ...the Internet searches for you!

  5. Technology is a double edged sword.. by grub · · Score: 5, Funny


    1980: Do you have Herpes?

    1986: Do you have AIDS?

    1995: I have pepper spray.

    2004: I have Google.

    Oh well.. at least RealDolls can't use search engines.. yet..

    --
    Trolling is a art,
    1. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by thdougherty · · Score: 5, Funny

      Oh if only I knew of RealDolls before I got married...

      They're so lifelike!!!

    2. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by kfg · · Score: 3, Funny

      Don't be silly. They never say a word.

      KFG

    3. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by CoolVibe · · Score: 3, Funny
      And how exactly is that a bad thing? If only some women in my life had a mute button.

      (I am trying to be funny here, no disrespect, just brainless male bushido)

    4. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by kfg · · Score: 2, Funny

      I am trying to be funny here, no disrespect

      Well, yes, and none taken. But that was my joke. :)

      Another reason aren't lifelike is because they don't make you put them through college, buy them a new car and then take your house away from you.

      No, I'm not bitter. What makes you think that?

      KFG

    5. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      Can you please show off and post a picture of your wife? I think you should be less introverted and be proud of the great person she is. Thanks.

      P.S. Don't forget the picture. Thanks.

    6. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by Darken_Everseek · · Score: 3, Funny

      eh ... just brainless male "code of the warrior"?

      I suppose that's -one- way of looking at pissing off a large group of females. Really though, I think Hari-kiri might be the better term for that activity though.

    7. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by Cipster · · Score: 2, Funny

      And that's a bad thing????? Oh the money I'd pay....

    8. Re:Technology is a double edged sword.. by squaretorus · · Score: 2, Funny

      please forgive me, I cannot resist saying this -- she's a stunning blonde, tall, gorgeous, busty, and has a degree in mathematics. Ca-Ching!

      I have a good friend who insists HIS woman is a gorgeous busty blonde with a comp-sci degree. She certainly has a degree, and she is certainly a BIT blonde.... and so long as HE thinks shes gorgeous he's happy. In fact - she's rough as hell. Bung her onto hotornot and test your taste! Anything less than an 8.9 and your deluding yourself and should trade up!

  6. Major Major Major by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Man, I bet this guy is wishing his parents had given him a more common name than "LaShawn Pettus-Brown"...

    1. Re:Major Major Major by robbyjo · · Score: 5, Funny

      I bet this guy is wishing his parents had given him a more common name

      Yeah, like... Anonymous Coward... That would score 138K hits in Google

      --

      --
      Error 500: Internal sig error
    2. Re:Major Major Major by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      That's the trouble with being black - you just can't use any name that's appeared in print prior to the date of your birth.

  7. You have to wonder by nizo · · Score: 5, Funny

    If your potential date discovers you sell penis enlargement items on the internet for a living, will that help or hurt your chances?

    --
    I Am My Own Worst Enemy
  8. OK, geeks... by Black+Parrot · · Score: 2, Funny


    That's why you know it's best not to date.

    --
    Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
  9. That's not me... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    That's just someone with my name... and my picture... and my fingerprints.

  10. All backwards! by Complicity · · Score: 3, Funny
    ...was caught by his date's discovery of him on an FBI site of fugitives...
    Hmmm, I wonder how many people use the FBI Fugitive List in order to find potential dates...
    --
    - c -
    1. Re:All backwards! by bilbobuggins · · Score: 2, Funny
      Hmmm, I wonder how many people use the FBI Fugitive List in order to find potential dates...

      i would.
      but for some strange reason my last copy of the fugitive list didn't have any phone numbers or adresses with the pictures...

  11. Re:BE CAREFUL OF LINK! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Porn? It's not porn! It's just a website where lonely geeks can find a friend who is rather...easy to burst into flames if too close to a fire. That's discrimination, brother!

  12. damn by CAIMLAS · · Score: 2, Funny

    Oh, damn. Here I was, thinking google was starting a new dating service - called Fugitive. :)

    It'd probably be immensely popular. "Check to see if this man is a fugitive? Yes | No"

    --
    ~/ssh slashdot.org ssh: connect to host slashdot.org port 22: too many beers
  13. Unbelievably cheap bastard by SysKoll · · Score: 5, Funny
    From the article: The city lost more than $184,000 on the project after investing heavily in Pettus-Brown's failed plan to rehabilitate the 90-year-old theater on Vine Street. The FBI has said that nearly $93,000 of the money the city paid Pettus-Brown is missing.

    So the guy steals about 100K and invites a date to freaking Applebee?! EIther he's really a cheap bastard or he already spent it all.

    Men these days. You cannot even get a French restaurant date out of a rich thief anymore.

    --

    --
    Mad science! Robots! Underwear! Cute girls! Full comic online! http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/

  14. Googling for dates? by artemis67 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hmmm... could be interesting... lemesee...

    +blonde +thirtysomething +"blue eyes" -kids +"36 24 36" -smoker +5'11" +model +"into geeky guys"

    Wha? Zero results?

    1. Re:Googling for dates? by utahjazz · · Score: 4, Funny

      Afer triimming this down to "+blonde, +"blue eyes" - kids - smoker +model +"into geeky guys", Google said:

      Do you mean "+blonde, +"blue eyes" - kids - smoker +modell +"Greek guys"?

      My God that's dissapointing, Damn racist computer program engine favors some crappy island over it's own maker.

      I think Captian Kirk had something to say on the subject. Can't...find...link....

    2. Re:Googling for dates? by leftie_hater · · Score: 2, Funny

      Guess you're not "feeling lucky" then, eh?

      --

      ---------
      George W. Bush in 2004!
  15. Re:IPO Coming, can Scroogol be far away ??? by I+Be+Hatin' · · Score: 2, Funny
    I wonder if they are planning to capitalize on it, maybe a reference service like Froogle, but for dating.

    If they're launching a dating service, they should call it "Go ogle". Dating services are already known to be meat markets...

    --
    I know god exists. I read it on the internet, so it must be true.
  16. Re:IQ test by eric2hill · · Score: 5, Funny

    I called our phone company at work and asked if they sold Caller IQ because, as I explained, there are many idiots at our office and I would like to screen my callers based on their IQ. The sales person didn't have it available yet. Dammit.

    --
    LOAD "SIG",8,1
    LOADING...
    READY.
    RUN
  17. Re:thankfully... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    :::searches google::

    "Jonathan Cain" -Journey

    You sexually assaulted a donkey back in 1977?!?!

  18. Eluding the FBI for Dummies... by fatray · · Score: 2, Funny

    suggests that you not use your real name when you are on the run from the FBI. It might also be a good idea to steal more than $180k--that won't let you live it up for long in NYC.

  19. Re:What else would you expect? by rosie_bhjp · · Score: 2, Funny

    heh same here. Remember what Mark Twain said about Cincy...

    "When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Cincinnati because it's always twenty years behind the times."

    --
    A radio maverick jumps to internet only. The Future of Rock n Roll
  20. Maybe it works the other way as well. by Karplusan · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hmmm, so if girls check google on their guys... Say, how does one go about getting their webpage put in the top of Google? I was thinking of trying to register http://www.heisthebest.com/ and of course, put my name all over it. I see no flaws in my plan.

  21. Re:Now that's journalism by LanceTaylor · · Score: 3, Funny

    The newpaper editor Googling skills might have improved, but not their proofreading skills.

    Neither have yours... ;-)

  22. Re:BE CAREFUL OF LINK! by martinX · · Score: 5, Funny

    who the hell would look at naked dolls

    Ken?

    --
    When they came for the communists, I said "He's next door. Take him away. Goddam commies."
  23. Make sure they don't read /. by jaymzter · · Score: 2, Funny

    If you have a common enough name and **aren't** on the lam you might be okay. Just make sure she doesn't know your l337 /. name or you're dead!
    ...Oh shit, you're all heading for Google now...

    --
    If thou see a fair woman pay court to her, for thus thou wilt obtain love
  24. Re:Tsk, tsk... no using Googling as a verb... by TelcusFreshbreeze · · Score: 2, Funny
    Did you google for that?

    Woops, I mean did you search the Internet using a popular engine for that?

  25. They Never Caught Me by dbCooper0 · · Score: 2, Funny
    I use this moniker or a derivitive of it almost everywhere on line :) Gets me into some cool conversations like "how much of that $100k you got left" or "did you pack your own parachute?"...mostly from people in the Pacific NW.

    I do a Google for my real name, and it comes up with nothing even close - of course there are 21,300 hits when I use quotes!

    --
    db
    Cig:
    ôô
    /`
  26. next thing you'll know by Indy1 · · Score: 2, Funny

    you'll see him at http://www.writeaprisoner.com/

    --
    Lawyers, MBA's, RIAA? A jedi fears not these things!
  27. Re:Now that's journalism by MushMouth · · Score: 2, Funny
    Oh yeah, its slashdot. Nobody ever reads the articles.


    Not even the editors

  28. Re:I had a similar experience by AvantLegion · · Score: 4, Funny
    If you're not superstitious or spooked by that sort of stuff, it's a great way to get a cheap house.

    Not to mention the Coolest House Evar.

    Charge goths and New Age geeks to hold seances there every Thursday night. Pretty soon, the already-cheap house will pay itself off!

    Built-in excuse to keep away unwanted guests! "No, mother of my wife, I don't think you should stay, because our house reeks of death."

    Great for scaring children and keeping them out of the flower beds! "Yes Billy, the owner of the house before the Johnsons really did die in there".

    The possibilities are endless. There need to be real estate websites with these sort of listings! Heck, when the next Dot-Com era comes, I'll start one!

  29. Gossiping coworkers by Neo-Rio-101 · · Score: 2, Funny

    My girlfriend did a search on my name on google, and on the first 3 hits she found some page out of a BBS where some of my co-workers were slagging me off. Needless to say I will be calling them by their internet handles at work from now on.

    --
    READY.
    PRINT ""+-0
  30. Re:There is a trait highly common in criminals by ameoba · · Score: 2, Funny

    [blockquote]That's not to say there haven't been some really smart crooks, the smartest of which we likely know nothing of...[/blockquote]

    What do you mean? We voted them into office...

    Oh, wait. You said smart, not successful.

    --
    my sig's at the bottom of the page.
  31. The Jerk 2k4 by n3tkUt · · Score: 2, Funny

    Look I'm in the google engine! -I'm finally somebody! I'm somebody! I'm in the google engine!

  32. SouthPark Refrence. by glk572 · · Score: 2, Funny

    halfy-"I Would."
    "oh shut up halfy you don't have any legs you coulden't screw anything."

    Halfie

    note, link is a clip from a different episode, but it has the same point.

    --
    Well art is art isn't it, but then again water is water; and east is east; and west is west; and if you take cranberries
  33. Re:IQ test by kfg · · Score: 2, Funny

    Pardon me sir, but do you have a license for the parent poster?

    KFG

  34. Just don't post it to Slashdot using your name by xixax · · Score: 4, Funny
    ... and several other convictions of assult and death threats. So the moral of the story is, if you have suspicions, it doesn't hurt to take 1 minute to run a quick google search.

    Just don't post the results to Slashdot using your real name in case your neighbours are also using Google to check you out.

    Maybe seed Google with your own bogus details, "John is Amish and does not own any consumer electronics worth stealing, he has a black belt in Karate and breeds rattlesnakes as a hobby..."

    Xix.

    --
    "Everything is adjustable, provided you have the right tools"
  35. Are you kidding? by raehl · · Score: 2, Funny

    Wife's picture on dating site = free pass.

    --
    paintball
  36. There's a common acronym for a SMART crook.... by raehl · · Score: 3, Funny

    CEO

    --
    paintball
  37. It's all downhill after... by westendgirl · · Score: 2, Funny

    Once WKRP left the airwaves, baby, you'd just have to wonder, wonder what ever became of Pettus-Brown...

    --

    -- SYS 64738 --

  38. Found Out She's a Porn Star by Lordofohio · · Score: 2, Funny
    I googled a girlfriend a year ago and found out she's a British pornstar.

    I was relieved to see that it was just the same name, not the same person. Now when
    I look back however, I think of all the things that could have been..... :-)

  39. Data minning 101 by Felinoid · · Score: 4, Funny

    The problem with the search is it's way too spec.

    All a girl has to be is an inch off and the search fails.
    Also if she says "I'm into brainy guys", "I'm into nerdy guys" or "Geeks make me hot" the search fails... Not that I'd expect anyone to say "geeks make me hot" just giving an example...

    As for the "Into geek guys" forget it she's gone by now... Every Slashdot geek had sent her a preposal.... well ok I'm more a tweek thow.. (Diffrence between me and a geek? I've got less brains and I'm insain...).

    +blonde +thirtysomething +"blue eyes" -kids +"36 24 36" -smoker +5'11" +model +"into geeky guys"

    Ok let's try remaking this to be a more realistic search ok?

    +blonde This is fine.. Every "yellow" haired woman calls herself blonde.

    +thirtysomething Changes are you'll get her exact age why should she even bother with the term "thirtysomething" strike it..

    +"blue eyes" ok... A bit exssesive but the search would work...

    -kids This is vage enough it will block all "with kids" it will also knock out "Not ready for kids" or "can't stand kids"... But it's a reasonable filter we can knock it out later.. if needed.

    "36 24 36" Are we searching for a date or giving specs for a fembot? Human beings aren't going to fit an exact mold. Strike it...

    -smoker Like kids this filters "I am a smoker" and "I am not a smoker"... This is probably not the kind of thing you want to filter... Leave it in for first search.

    +5'11" Ahem.. So if she's 5'10" or 6'" your not intrested?
    +5' This will give you everyone who is 5 foot...

    +model Ahem.. are we searching for dates or phone sex? If she says she's a model she is eather lying or to busy to actually date.
    Strike it...

    +"into geeky guys" Way to detailed... She'd have to actually use that exact phrase.

    Try just +geek.. This will scoop up "I'm a geek girl looking for a geek guy"

    Now we have: +blonde +"blue eyes" -kids +5' +geek

    1,630 results.... Exelent...
    Now I can screen them by hand for... dear god no Huston we have a problem.

    +woman

    1,060 results... Good.

    Let's trim this down a tad +female. The search results still had to many guys "looking for a woman"... Just need to imprint on the search the importance of finding a FEMALE date..

    Ok to many unrelated results... Oh sure I like "Buffy the vampire slayer" but reading about how much fans like Spike dose not get me anywhere.

    +dating

    Well.. I'll ferther refine this but that will be to my personal tasts...
    Damn it thow.. I find a post on Japanise intrested in western and it's Japanise MEN looking for western wemen.
    Oh the +blond thing kinda makes that not happen anyway.

    I'm srapping "blue eyes" becouse I don't care about eye color.. Then add +California becouse that is where I live.

    424 results... I'll be refining this all freaking night...

    Well I found this nifty link and I can finish my search that way.

    And that is how you ue google to find a date.
    Oh dear god I'm pathetic... Finding dates by computer... I'm affrade I need to bash my self senseless now.

    --
    I don't actually exist.
  40. good new business to start by cheekyboy · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hey sounds like a great business to start, give IT/businesplans to criminals and such.

    Define their goal/problem and solve it with a powerpoint slide presentation define their solution and step by step guide on what to do and not to do so they can succeed.

    add in the papar
    "Are you a dumb crook, too stupid, left highschool at 15 and now are looking for quick bucks but dont want to be caught by FBI who left school at 18? Then call us , CRIMEDOESPAY(for 10% fee) , tell us what you dont or plan to do, and we will define a business plan to make sure you will succeed and not get 'trapped'. All details are highly confidential and all data will be destroyed after consultation and fees paid. Call 555-CRIME. or check us out online www.defeat-the-fbi-mmmkay.com " ;-)

    --
    Liberty freedom are no1, not dicks in suits.
  41. Too much time at jailbabes by Dukael_Mikakis · · Score: 2, Funny

    Dude, I'm never double-dating with you.

  42. Re:BE CAREFUL OF LINK! by NanoGator · · Score: 3, Funny

    "(not that I looked ...)"

    I think your pants are on fire.

    --
    "Derp de derp."