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Online Gaming for Couples?
psuedo_samurai asks: "My longtime girlfriend recently had to move to complete her studies at a University, which is nowhere near where I live. Talking on the phone is quickly becoming old, as I'm a typical guy and hate being on the phone longer than 3 minutes, but I try. So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two? So are there any online games suggested for couples using a headset? I can't see Counter-Strike or Rainbow Six working, but I was thinking maybe DDR Ultramix on Xbox Live? How about PC titles with headset support? Any suggestions?"
you can try cybersex
...Gibbin' the ole' GF to show her your true affection.
Nothing disturbs me more than blind loyalism towards some unrealistic and over-idealistic notion of one's nationality.
Cyber online using Good ol' Netmeeting and Notepad.
And why did you staple the trout to the RAM?
A friend of mine and his girlfriend, plays AA together. They use TS.
Duke Nukem, he loves the ladies so I would suggest, Duke Nukem 3D. Oh wait . . .
So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?
How come this guy has a girlfriend and I don't?
I've found that a lot of girls really like the communication and character outfitting aspects of Phantasy Star Online. Back in the days of the Dreamcast, my sister would lord over my copy for hours on end.
Whether they prefer typing (GCN) or voice (XB) communication is pretty much the only difference in the versions.
- colin
...but my wife and I both play neverwinter nights- great multiplayer game that can provide good laughs if you have a good module. I highly suggest the nordock module.
Looking for Book Reviews? Check out Literary Escapism.
I really don't see how gaming would help. The idea is communication and gaming would just cloud that with alterior motives. Not only that but you would also both have to choose "avatars" in the gaming world presenting more complications.
How about writing letters, sending nice postcards, and an occasional phone call. Or even if you must go the technological route a communal blog?
.... how you suggest that one. Or your character may lose all his nookie points. What!?!? So talking to me is so hard...... You may not wanna go there.
Free Mac Mini Yeah, it's
Unless she likes games too, this doesn't stand a chance in hell of working out well for you. You are trying to use logic -- guy logic -- to deal with women. The sooner you learn how futile this is, the better it is for you.
I'm a typical guy and hate being on the phone longer than 3 minutes, but I try. So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?
Not knowing the full situation I have to ask: Have you asked her if she'd like to be in an online game for longer than 3 minutes? If she's like many (most?) women she would want to have your full attention during a conversation (the 4 other
It sounds like you want to have your cake and eat it too; make sure this is what she wants before you send her all sorts of geek gear. She may just twist your intentions into thinking you're pushing her away.
Trolling is a art,
My girlfriend and I were in a similar situation. We played Civ:CTP (via email). This had several advantages:
1) Being that it was via email, we could do it "asynchronously" as needed.
2) While we were chatting online (which we both prefer to the phone), we could still play, and it was easy enough to do since it was still email based.
3) It was a fun game!
4) We could "show off" to each other based on our Civilisation building skills. (Hers were always better.)
5) I played it on Linux, and she played on Windows, and there were no problems!
All in all, it was a good experience, and allowed us to game together while far apart.
libertarianswag.com
"So I was thinking - I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?"
The question is does *she* like games. I'm not going to try to give relationship advice here, but you'd probably be better off asking *her* what game she'd like to play (if any) rather than asking Slashdot.
Hey man,
... hope this helps man, and good luck!
The only problem is the games she'll enjoy probably won't have voice comm right out of the box. But if you used Teamspeak or Roger Wilco you'd have your voice channel open no matter what games your playing! I'd reccommend Gunbound as my gf spends more time playing it than I do!! It's essentially a free, online only, Worms/Scorched Earth clone but when you win a match you get gold which can be spent on new gear for your avatar! Wait till she sees some of the dresses she can buy! Anywho
Kleedrac
Sure we wang, can.
...you're asking for couples' advice on /. ? ;-)
you mean, he'll dress up as an elf, and she'll be the barbarian :)
A friend of mine plays Star Wars galaxies online with his wife. They have a club setup where she can dance for visitors and he usually listens to the band playing. They have full conversations/arguments online in front of other people visiting their club.
It's the most interaction between people I have seen in an online game before.
Although you have to pay the monthly gaming fee which I think is in the range of $15/month.
Those who trade in their freedom for security, deserve neither.
your girlfried would appreciate you talking to her while playing? Most girls I know require the full attention of the male CPU....
It's my experience that you don't get to talk much while playing a game.
I guess it depends on which game you are playing, but still. Odds are you'll be too busy focusing on the events of the game to be typing in sentence after sentence.
Whenever I decide to play Return to Castle Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory with friends, unless the whole server is full of friends I really don't do much talking to my friend. Once in a while there's the occasional haha killed you again or damn you suck but generally speaking, I'm more concentrated on the game.
Another issue...does she even like games? I mean, making her play a game just to get to talk to you seems a little bit...inconsiderate? If she's a gamer, then there's no problem, but if she isn't, expect her to be less than thrilled at the prospect.
Now, I realize you were asking about headsets, so you wouldn't have so much of a problem with the typing. Still, almost the same rule applies - you will not want to engage in conversations of reasonable complexity because it will impedete your performance in game.
I guess it could work, but I suggest you learn to stay on the phone a little longer, for the sake of your girlfriend.
http://www.teamspeak.org/
:-P
Team speak can be used for any game, but you can use it just by yourself to have voice chats over your own running server/client. Quality is great and it's free.
Oh and you have a girlfriend who's into GAMES?! You're not fooling anyone, bub!
----------
Check out my blackbox styles
Pick a game that you two could enjoy. Fire up your favourite voice chat proggie (Ventrilo, TeamSpeak, Roger Wilco, etc.) and frag away.
The game doesn't necessarily need headset support or anything like that. So long as you have a third party proggie to handle the mess.
- shazow
DDR Ultramix; online gaming for couples... ...sounds like Ultra Dominatrix
*does* work for some couples...
my blog
I know several couples that play MMORPGS together, and even a few that met and married because of them. I played everquest but my wife never got into it. Now that I've started playing Star Wars Galaxies, she plays more than I do. The only problem is getting two fast computers and two accounts for the game so we can play at the same time. If your wanting some quality time together, I'd suggest playing an MMORPG and use something like Team-speak or Ventrilo...
Her: "I sometimes wonder whether we were really meant for each other"
You: "Ok, get ready, the troll king is going to pop up any moment. Blast him with your fire bolt!"
Her: "I worry that we don't communicate enough"
You: "Huh? I don't think...look! There's the troll king! Attack!"
Nice try, but from my experience, she'll probably want you to focus on the conversation, not on getting a high score.
You can go out on virtual dates and have virtual kids! Or maybe a dog.
My Other Computer Is A Data General Nova III.
I don't think you'll find much help about girlfriends from the usual slashdot crowd...
This thread might need people to disclose "IANCABF":
I Am Not Currently A BoyFriend
(Any humor is pointed at myself as well, as IANCABF either)
- Neil Wehneman
My legal education, in nifty podcast format
The question posed by the author is irrelevant. The mere fact that he's contemplating DDR or CS as viable communication options has already doomed the relationship.
There is nothing more we can do for him,
as a girl geek, i would say first check and see if she likes gaming. if so, my long distance boyfriend and i play worms armageddon. just one rule of gaming with a girlfriend - never keep score and don't get too competitive.
increase the peace
I've been beta testing an MMOG called There for several months and it is a much more sociable experience than almost any other MMOG out there. All the "leveling up" is performed by talking, organizing events, and riding vehicles. No killing, no NPCs. Really it's just glorified IRC but with one fewer degree of separation because you and your friends have a lifelike customizeable avatar. Sexist stereotyping is beneath us all so I'll just say that the game has paintball guns, a variety of wheeled, flying, and riding vehicles, and lots and lots of shopping and outfits for whomever might enjoy such activities.
Unless the GF is of a similar skill level and has the same interest in games, I doubt it'll work.
My GF loves to play Mario Party on my gamecube, but that's about the extent of her interest in gaming. She'll watch me play a little half-life or UT now and then, but usually once I get into it the torrent of swear words puts her off.
I can just imagine getting fragged and accusing her of being a wallhack fag and having that be the end of the relationship...
You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
Try Yahoo Games. Seriously. Yahoo Pool is widely popular and is a great way to mindlessly have fun and chat with people.
If your gf isn't the dork you are, it might be the only thing that works.
when you rather FRAG then SHAG your girlfriend.
You don't like to TALK to your girlfriend? Why are you going out with her then? You're honestly going to tell her that you prefer videogames to talking to her? Are you insane??
If you think my reaction is a poor one, wait until you hear hers.
Here's the thing, if the goal here is to have a conversation, then, no, this probably isn't a good solution. If the goal, on the other hand, is to create a sense of being together, then this would work well.
I mean, when you are in a relationship long enough, you tend to have less conversations, and it's more time just spent being around the other person. Doing things together, or sometimes just being in the same place but doing your own things.
If you have a long distance relationship, it's easy to stay in communication these days. The trick is creating that sense of physical proximity, that the other person is somehow there. This may be possible, to a degree, through a gaming environment.
This sig has been temporarily disconnected or is no longer in service
> I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?
This one is simple!
Get her on the phone, ask her how her childhood affects your current relationship, put on a headset, fire up your favorite FPS and start blasting away!
You may finish several levels, if not the entire game!
- For the complete works of Shakespeare: cat
I have a great girlfriend, shes into gaming and has the a lot of the same interests I do, and we are in a similar situation, but if she found out I have to play games to be able to stand talking to her for more then 3 minutes there would be hell to pay
What could be more romantic than to meet your loved one on de_dust under the tunnel with knives only...only to be betrayed by someone pulling a deagle.
If that's not love...then...um...it's something unlike love.
"Music is everybody's possession. It's only publishers who think that people own it." - John Lennon.
Someone mentioned that playing a mmorpg game as a long distance couple might be a detriment to communication. I strongly disagree. We played through several major mmorpgs and beta tests of other games together. During "down time" in a game we carried on "normal" conversation. During the exciting parts of the game we got caught up into solving problems together. We even developed mutual friends whom we visited in the real world.
As far as someone worrying that "girls" might not like to play games for hours at a time: I and many of my friends are evidence to the contrary.
Lastly, though I think the MMORPGs are best suited for couple gaming, don't discount the FPS games either. I enjoyed Action Quake and beta tested Planetside. I just think they aren't as good for a couple because they (I'm talking public server play, not clan gaming) tend to be all action all the time rather than a mix of action, socialization/political skill, and strategy.
~Fricka
OffLineTshirts.com
My GF and I are the most hardcore of hardcore gamers. :P Okay, obviously not very hardcore if we're playing games like Final Fantasy XI and Ragnarok Online (*giggle*) but it works.
.hack :D) and something where you can go and feel like you're 'doing' something together (even if it's hunting little rats in the forest). When we just wanna goof off for a while it's fun.
We both travel around a lot so we've had to keep in contact on the phone and over the Internet. Our best choice for a game is a friendly, community-based RPG. Something where you can walk around and talk and feel a bit more 'there' with each other (you have no idea how much the graphics and emotes do for things, dunno if anyone's watched
Obviously this requires that you have a good imagination, lots of time to waste, and you both like that sorta shit. But IMHO find something that is MODERATELY active (ahem, not quake) but not something that *only* focuses on talking. Cause that would be maddening eventually, even if you're in love beyond all imagination.
Other suggestions would be similarly 'beer & pretzel' games, maybe you both have an addiction to Civ or some cardgame or something. I'd really REALLY push for a virtual world, though, because it inspires the imagination and won't get old so fast.
Again, not sure if this would work with you, but I've done it successfully for quite a while now. Two or three times a week I'd just tell all my friends to go suck it and play with her that night. Course, straight chicks just suck, so it might not work, but at any rate TALK IT OUT WITH HER! WHAT ARE YOU DOING ASKING HERE! Tsk tsk tsk.
Personal experience: I wanted to talk to my girlfriend and found that she was playing a game online. (Puzzle Pirates, which is cute and silly unlike most other MMO games.) In fact, she's been playing said game ever since she got broadband a few days ago. Well, I like Puzzle Pirates, she plays it all the time, why not talk to her in the game world?
So I logged into the game and sent her a private message. She finished what she was doing and came to where I was and we started "talking". Let's call me A and her B.
A: Hey! I haven't talked to you in a while. *hug*
B: *hug* Wanna fight?
A: Did you get my letter?
(B challenges A to a duel.)
B: Fight me!!!
A: Um, okay...
(A and B fight. A wins.)
B: =( Not fair! You have a better sword! (I've been playing on and off for longer than she has.)
A: Aww... *hug*
B: I'm off to earn more money and buy a better sword now. =P
(B leaves the island on a pirate ship to plunder some loot.)
A: But but I wanted to talk about our relationship...
Really, talking and communicating are two different things. Even when you're not busy killing rabbits for EXP or shooting each other and manage to have meaningful conversations about non-game stuff they wouldn't be anything more signifigant than "I had tuna for dinner". When you're in a game--especially when you're a serious gamer--you're going to keep your focus on your party member's positions and their abilities and cool combos you can perform with them, limiting your chat only to "heal me I'm dying!!!" or the occasional "wow you suck I ownzed you" (don't say that with your SO unless she/he says it to you too =). Meaningful, deep conversations about your relationship (which I assume is what the original poster's girlfriend wanted) don't really happen in games, with the exception of something like a tabletop role-playing game--but by definition everything that goes on in the game is restricted to inside the game and whatever romance you develop is for your characters only, not you. (I can't really imagine how many girl gamers smacked a guy whose character has a relationship with hers so he thought they would be involved in real life too.)
And besides, when you're trying to communicate, do it as yourself and not "GoblinSlayer256" or some other fictional character. If she really wanted to date a half-orc barbarian or a Navy SEAL she probably wouldn't even have looked at you in the first place. (Unless you're actually a half-orc Navy SEAL, in which case I apologize.)
read the bunni comic
Get some boom/headset mics for you and your SO and fire up one of the free voice engines, like TeamSpeak or Roger Wilco for voice chat (in or out of games). I've used TeamSpeak with excellent results while playing Unreal Tournament and other games, as well as just for conversing with distant family members on a semi-regular basis. (Free is good!)
For gaming, you have a chuckwagon full of choices. Unreal Tournament, Star Wars: Jedi Knight - Jedi Academy and Need for Speed: Underground top my recent list of multi-player games for raw fun and enjoyment with minimal commitment level (and I sense a commitment issue from the OP anyway!). Then of course, there's the obligatory mentions of The Sims, Everquest, Age of Mythology and Civilization III (find your own URLs for those), if you're into that kind of gaming (these require a higher commitment level).
If you two are more cerebral in your gaming, go hunt down a board game called Settlers of Catan and its offspring (Seafarers of Catan, et. al.) and play that with some friends next time you two are together. Once you get hooked on the board game -- and you will -- start playing it online. There's a nefarious, somewhat-underground (not after /. gets wind of it!) online client called
Sea3D that works pretty darn well
(Win32 only, sorry -- but if this is a problem, use the
Java client instead), and is terribly enjoyable for raw strategy and board game
fun, although it can sometimes be difficult to get players to join hosted games
(there doesn't seem to be a LARGE community of Sea3D users yet). If you
host your own games and have people you know join in, this is a non-issue.
If you're side-stepping the guy-girl conversation thing, your best bet is probably one of the action games, like Unreal and its similar-engine spawn (anything based off the Quake2 or Quake3 engines). There's usually so much going on in a DeathMatch or Team DeathMatch, there isn't much time for deep chit-chat, but you can both probably come out feeling like you had a onversation.
[Note to Guys: this probably isn't going to lead to a long-term, deep relationship, mind you, but will suffice for temporary distance relationships. Chicks don't generally like games, and especially don't like the KINDS of games we guys like, so YMMV. Board games and strategy type stuff, though, are generally universally enjoyable, which is why I mentioned Catan (this is the original German site).]
Good luck!!
As others have said, there are tools such as TeakSpeak and Roger Wilco that will deal with the voice chat side of things.
But what game to play? I'd suggest A Tale In The Desert. It's nice because it has a very laid-back feel to it - there's no combat, and the emphasis is on long-term co-operation with your friends to further the development of your avatar (the web site, as well as the excellent fansites and wiki explain all this much better than I can).
It runs on Windows and Linux, and doesn't have to run full-screen, so it's great for leaving running in the background so that you can get some work done while your avatar is busy feeding the camels or waiting for papyrus to grow. The chat system is also pretty good, for those of is who don't want to inflict their irritating nasally voices on the rest of the world. :-)
My wife used to nag about "all that damn time you spend on the computer" until recently. I heard from a friend about a new game called URU that is like a sequel to Myst and Riven. I don't normally play games and my wife definitely does not...but we bought this and we're actually pretty impressed. It's not a shoot em up, and you pretty much just figure out puzzles and stuff but the graphics are great and the online version is just about ready.
You can play the online game for free right now while they are working out the bugs but the features that may interest you are voice chat (not yet implemented, so currently it's text chatting) and the fact that you can explore with whomever you want. You can create avatars that actually look like you and overall the game seems to have a lot of potential...if you like that kind of game.
2 things to warn you about. You need to play this game on a pretty decent computer with a good video card, and if your girlfriend ends up like my wife...you won't get as much work done anymore! Instead of her constant nagging about just plain being on the computer too much, now it's nagging that I spend too much time working when we should be playing the game together :)
-Pat
These two are free, and socially interactive.
Gunbound: kinda like worms, but, online. There are some lamers, but, overall, it can be fun.
You can find info for gunbound at:
http://www.gunbound.net/
Then, there is fairyland. This is where her and I currently reside. Its a nice free MMORPG.
http://www.fairyland.com.my/
Enjoy.
Supernaut
It's not easy to maintain a relationship like that. It took me years to get the woman I married interested in email. Moving to a different state was tough. All she would do is mail, even though she was a draftsman and her dad maintained a computer with email on it and gave her an account with her ISP. It was very frustrating to read week old letters when we had much faster mailing set up. I put up with it and simply snail mailed her back or phoned if anything was urgent. She did not like that her dad could read her mail and considered my email nagging a drag and a put off. Don't go there with games.
If she was interested in a particular game, that could be a common interest and great. Of course, if that were the case, he would be asking her not Slashdot.
My wife now likes email and IM. She's root on her own machine in her own house and that works for her. We keep up a lively conversation when I go to work. One day, I'm going to find a game that we might like to play together.
Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.
Well, as others have said, do make sure she's into this idea. But of course, she may be more interested if you've got some suggestions handy, so...
:)
:)
I find cooperative games are usually the best for couples gaming. Among my friends, RPGs are probably the most popular among the couples (including me and my boyfriend). Neverwinter nights, Baldur's Gate, Icewind Dale, Dungeon Siege and plenty of others fit the bill nicely. They're especially good if the two are you aren't evenly matched, since any disparity is less noticeable and less frustrating.
I imagine warcraft would be fun, but it's a steep learning curve. I had a blast playing tower defense and stuff with friends, but I know as a casual player, i can't keep up with them in games that involve more and differing units 'cause I simply don't remember what they all do. Again, co-op is probably best -- certainly fosters more talking than trash talking.
I'll admit it, I've even played a good old text-based MUD with my current boyfriend, and I know a few people who've played those with their significant others. Maybe it's because it's all text, but it seems to foster more conversation than I had playing warcraft. Mind you, it's slow, text-based conversation, but it's still conversation!
Games that pause so you can chat are good. Turn-based games like civ are also good, so you've got time to think, play and talk.
Puzzle games go over well with my female friends, so it might be fun to explore that end of the spectrum. I don't know if you can have networked frozen bubble, but there's got to be some things along those lines.
DDR is a great idea, and as a bonus, works as an aerobic exercise program.
But finally, don't think of this as a way to avoid phone calls, more as a supplement so you can spend more time together. It'll probably just work out better that way.
Most of my female friends if you suggested they play tennis or golf games, they'd just as rather whack you over the head with a racket or club. Girls can be just as bloodthirsty in gaming as guys, and it really does boil down to personal preference. Tetris is great from time to time, but it gets old. MMORPGs can be good (I'm eagerly awaiting the release of World of Warcraft so my bf and I can play, and yes we signed up for the beta). I'm not as rabid a gamer as he, I'd rather just spend my computer time sometimes working on my personal programming/networking projects. But I adore the exploratory aspects of MMORPGs and games such as Morrowind (wide expansive landscapes), some killing or even a lot (I have a few female friends who are rapid GTAers, me, I do "GTA: Morrowind" at times to alleviate stress, working on my goal of strategically eradicating the 3k+ named NPCs in the game), and some people prefer to focus on the RP aspects of MMORPGs. Everyone looks for different things in a game, both guys and girls, and I think the guy who originally asked the question should probably get to know his girl better and her preferences and maybe suggest games she could play to occupy some of the time he won't be around. Not try to get her to play just to say they are doing something "together" and "communicating." Girls are people too, k?
I like games, she likes to talk, why not combine the two?
Whenever my gf calls to talk, I load up counter strike and turn off the volume. It's a great combination that gets me through the whole conversation.
Outdoor digital photography, mostly in New Engl
1. its a rare female that will hang around long distance for very long.
;-)
2. Stay away from the game idea, and drive your butt over to her often, before she gets bored.
3. Remember - females like for men to listen, understand, and laugh when appropriate. If you follow this principle, #2 can be rewarding
Is the juice worth the sqeeze?
Invest in webcams.
My girlfriend lives a bit under 2 hours from me. We see each other on weekends and sometimes during the week, but not as often as we'd like.
I was always getting in trouble by misinterpreting things said on IM, so I got us two webcams for Christmas. The visual interaction beats anything you'll get in an online game.
Now, if I can just figure out how to best conform to Valentine's day....
paintball
In addition to other modes of communication, playing a game together would really help create that shared experience, but do not think that you can REPLACE the phone conversations. I would suggest that if she is not a gamer, you should find a long list of different types of games to suggest. There are sites for board games to be played online too if she's not keen on FPS or RPG styles.
I hope you're not pretending to be evil while secretly being good. That would be dishonest.
More importantly if she leaves you, does she get 1/2 of your online house and your pet wolf?
>> ...maybe because 60% of the players are
...maybe because 60% of players claim to be women
>> women!!
Correction:
I started my wife on CS a few weeks ago by taking her to a LAN party. She is hooked ! She now plays at least four evenings a week and it is me who can't keep up with her and suggests that maybe there are better things to be done. Good thing that our nine months old daughter cries from time to time to remind her that she is hungry/dirty and makes sure that she does not play all the time...
CS is the only multiplayer game I successfuly got her interested in. She likes adventure games, I hate them; I love operational art but she does not want ot concentrate on learning military hardware and tactics. So a RTS is a good middle ground, and the short rounds make it much less frustrating for a beginner. She had never played a RTS before, and CS team play made her learn incredibly fast. The social side of LAN parties was a big win too, and no doubt that with a wife and our baby at the party we were an attraction.
But the best thing about playing CS is that whenever a conjugal argument gets too boring we can square it off weapons in hand and defuse the situation !one tip, though: have characters that you only play when you and your girlfriend are *together*, so you stay at pretty much the same levels. you would not believe how boring a good game can become when your friend is "letting you level" by bringing you to some place *they* feel is fun, and letting you get kills from a distance. ruined dungeon siege for me.
What ever you do, DON'T send her an XBox! That will just attract guys to her dorm! It would get you off the "talking-hook", but it will eventually rob you of all other "benefits" of having a girlfriend. ;-)
This message has been ROT-13 encrypted twice for higher security.
Anyway, the point is, things were great until we had to actually spend time together. We were fine in cyberspace, or just virtually for that matter. But once we spent time together for more than a week at a time the dynamics changed, and we found we had less going for us than we expected.
So, my second point is, don't substitute a virtual relationship for a real one. It makes a huge difference dating a person in town where geography allows for more frequent visits.
My final point is, don't take things too seriously until you spend a significant time together. Cyber/LDR relationships can give a fals sense of well-being.
Sierra Tango Foxtrot Uniform
Back off dude. If we stick together they'll never know the difference.
I don't get the metrosexual stuff either. A lot of the stuff that they are co-opting (being well groomed, well-dressed, etc) is what gentlemen are supposed to be anyway.
Simple really.
Some guys find it boring to be straight white anglo males. Lets face it, you might be sitting on the apex of the social advantage pyramid, but culturally you're group is the probably the dullest ethnicity the species has ever produced. People at the bottom of the social respect pile have to work harder. Culturally speaking, they're overacheivers. Think about it: no blacks would mean no jazz, no rap, no blues (and therefore no rock). When the general population notices what's going on in the group culturally, it raises the status of the group, at least among the smarter people. Think about the white guys you may have known who affected black music and styles of speaking and dressing. Same thing really. Usually its some of the brighter kids who take this path of reinventing themselves.
Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
You need to run a gateway, H-232 IIRC. This runs on your firewall (assuming linux, this is /.) and acts as the port listener. Regular port numbers not the infuriatingly random IM ones, so you could host behind a NAT.
You both connect to it, most apps talk this protocol. Except MSN Messenger, hmmm typical. Allows IM & voice between you, and anyone else using it. I think this is essentially what the chat websites do, with an HTML front end. Now, this ain't something I've done, but I read something about it several years ago, when trying to do the same. I gave up, it was to chat with mainly local friends and not really neccessary.
A few links which may be of use to you in finding information on this - in particular the last one. Most of them are academic related - for example if anyone is in university halls they can make use of the JANET MCUs and gatekeepers.
. html
http://www.video.ja.net
The US equivalent:
http://commons.internet2.edu/
This link will probably be of most use:
http://commons.internet2.edu/h323/firewalls
For those interested in videoconferencing - you may like to join in on the megaconference where they get as many endpoints as possible to push videoconferencing to its limits:
http://www.megaconference.org./
And now a plug for my old videconferencing activities, although I haven't been involved at Manchester in over half a year:
http://www.mcc.ac.uk/mvss/
Just remember that if the world didn't suck we'd all fall off.