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Enderle's Ferrari Laptop
deminisma writes "Hilarity abounds as 'analyst' Rob Enderle gushes over his new Ferrari/Acer laptop. The laptop apparently even plays the sound of a car revving up while booting, which Enderle seems to think is all the rage at meetings."
Add a F.A. Porsche design Lacie drive [http://www.lacie.com/products/range.htm?id=10032] and a pine tree air freshener and one would be set no?
Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. -Martin Luther
Well at least the CEO of Nissan can't drive this into anyone. :-)
Way to go.
GTRacer
- Still, the paint's nice
Defending IP by destroying access to it? That makes sense, RIAA/MPAA. Go to the corner until you can play nice!
The obvious downsides to haveing a Ferrari computer:
Authorized customer support means having your own personal tech, at the same rate as a car mechanic.
Tech charges same as the Ferrari auto mechanics, speaks only italian and probably dresses sharper than you.
It needs a tune up every other week to keep in top performance condition.
When it's old, it's no classic, it's slow and out of date and looks lame compared to some cheap POS.
In exchange for its eye catching appeal, you have to live in denial of its shortcomings.
One scratch and it's just another laptop.
When it craps out, it's just another piece of dead weight, just like all other laptops.
It looks cool until your boss has one, too.
People accustomed to getting the best bang for the buck have no idea who 'Ferrari' is.
It probably looks really bad when you try to declare this as a business expense on your tax return.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Hate to break it to you, they're not 'joining the admirers', they're laughing their socks off at your gullibility.
Another non-functioning site was "uncertainty.microsoft.com."
The purpose of that site was not known.
sigh Maybe I'm wrong...
------------
But my brother's laptop is about as big as a ferrari... and you can always make Windows 3.1 play a sound when it starts up.. can't you?!?!??!
tim
I hope this isn't a new trend where automakers start designing laptops. Imagine a computer designed after something like.. oh... the Gremlin!
Sweet.
Der Tod ist der einzige Weg hier raus!
And then there is Walter Mondale, who had a Ferraro laptop.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
What can I say other than:
MUST OWN!!!!!
Needless to say, my credit card will shortly no longer feel underutilized...
I dunno, where I come from, loud boot sounds are followed by loud sounds of boots, kicking the ass of the shithead who didn't turn off his fucking speakers in the meeting.
"One impressive piece of execution is that when you fire the machine up it plays a WAV file of a Ferrari race car revving its engine. That alone is worth the relatively low $1,899 price of admission."
Hrm...I might have to track this guy down and sell him my outdated Dell laptop. I guess all I have to do is put a race car startup sound and he'll pay anything!
Just wonderful, next thing you know you'll have an "Acer rawkin Neon RT" laptop, or worse yet, some 16 year old goof in history class with his "Acer 2Fast Civic", complete with annoying useless NOZ stickers and an oversized processor fan.
Slashdot sucks
I admit, I stopped reading the article when I hit this paragraph: "One impressive piece of execution is that when you fire the machine up it plays a WAV file of a Ferrari race car revving its engine. That alone is worth the relatively low $1,899 price of admission. (I found it priced as low as $1,725 at PCVideoOnline.) Even when I'm in a meeting, I don't turn the sound off because of the unbridled envy that seems to show up in the eyes of my, granted mostly male, co-attendees. So far no one has complained." Now I feel dirty for having read as much as I did. -Sinter
From Wherever to Whenever.
So I can use this while driving, correct? You know, in addition to talking on my cell phone, shaving, making notes on my PDA, translating various languages for the benefit of my passengers, beating Kasparov at chess over the Internet, and giving advice to NASA and the ESA about how to avoid retaliation on their probes from the native Martian factions.
True story.
A loptop that says I have a really small penis
I love Ferrari cars and have since I first saw a Testarossa in a Motor Trend mag. And I used to collect Ferrari stuff to, mostly toys.
Although I stopped doing that 2 minutes ago after I saw what Ferrari agreed to put their name on.
Every manager's worst nightmare: stupid employees wasting time by turning their laptops on and off so that they can hear the startup sound.
Actually, both of the properties you listed would imply that he is rather wealthy from making sly Texas oil deals, so yes, he probably is rolling in chicks on his million dollar yacht.
True story.
So basically, because it's red and shiny, it's great? It's heavy, it gets bad battery life, and man, it really actually looks ugly when it's open. Sorry. But hey, the guy also owns a Ferrari watch... there's nothing classier than that.
Your powerbook came already loaded with BSD? That gives a whole new meaning to "dead on arrival".
Lets see...
Acer(Shiny Shiny Red ^ Ferarri logo)/CSt
where CSt == Consumer Stupidity
Yeap... the Acer marketing dept was right on the money this time. I read the story last week and I thought it was hilarious that a "tech-savvy" adult would get such a kick out of the PC equivelant of a Dukes of Hazard lunchbox.
Goes to show it's not all about Mhz/RAM/HD... nope not at all. Give anything a paint job, slap on a snazzy logo and damn... if someone wont think it's just the bestest thingy since slicest breaded.
It may be a Ferrari, but it runs like a Pinto when it gets Slashdotted :)
Segfault
Too bad they took the Ferrari thing to such a shallow level. Would would have been REALLY cool would be
- case made of carbon fibre
- billet aluminum trackpoint knob
- "paddle" mouse buttons
- see through area of case above the cpu
- red EVERYWHERE, expect where the black/grey of the cf showed through
- Italian voice sounds by default
- "track" day where all the notebook owners can get together and learn how to properly use their new toys
Oooooooh Shiney!
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.
"I drive a Ferrari" == "I have a small penis"
"I have a Ferrari laptop" == "I have a small penis, and a small wallet"
Handlebar mustache and a Ferrari laptop... This guy is obviously rolling in chicks!
That, sir, is not a handlebar moustache, these are handlebar moustaches. Look on these work, ye mighty, and despair.
Mind you, I agree that Rob must be absolutely up to his eyebrow in chicks.
Sailing over the event horizon
Zero to Blue Screen of Death in 3.8 seconds!
Nothing soothes me more than the boot chime of an Apple computer.
It seems to convey so many things in just one sound. It's beautiful.
It sounds stunning from the small, tinny inbuilt speaker on a 9600 and lusterous from the large floorstanders I have connected to the G5 via a Yamaha amp.
I hardly ever reboot my iBook though, so I forget what the sound is like on the small speakers, but I'm sure it's just as good as the other two machines.
ah but with a handlebar mustache, is it really the chicks he's after?
m.
I've never keyed a laptop before, but I guess I might be forced to start. Oh well.
Paul Lenhart writes words!
Well, I would like to see if someone tried a Delorian laptop... then lets the geeks get at it and plug in a flux capacitor, someone will have to drive at the correct speed plus with the way Intel are going with the CPU power requirements, it'll be a couple of Pentium revisions before we get to the 1.21Gigawatts that said notebook is needed to supply.
Why would we want to make a time travelling laptop? Why so we can remove any previous dupes /. have done from ever existing... but then we'd have a paradox problem with /. instead.
;)
Are you local? There's nothing for you here!
He probably doesn't care. This is the kind of guy that makes VROOM noises when he's feeding himself.
There are no trails. There are no trees out here.
Maybe it has a Ferrari decal. Or Ferrari brand thermal paste.
There are no trails. There are no trees out here.
A valid point, more so, a point of embarrassment if your Ferrari laptop has to be rebooted frequently during meetings.
"Enderle, what the hell is wrong with your laptop?"
"It's italian, sir."
"Well get a japanese one that works and doesn't make all the racket!"
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
And When you crash it at over 1Ghz, you die
I'm gonna produce this dope laptop with automotive clearcoat paint, and some panels just covered in primer! It'll have a big wing(handle) on the end of it and sound like a bunch of bumblebees when booting up! It'll have tons of athlon, pentium, and crucial stickers on it, but have absolutley none of those parts inside!!!
Best of all...it'll be cooled by nawwwssss...but when it runs out, you'll still think it's fast!
You mean all these years I've been fixing PCs for peanuts when all I needed to do was spend 10 seconds changing the bootup music for some sucker and he'll fork over $2k?
I just started back to school to get away from IT. Maybe it's time to move back...
Mine plays the Underwear Gnomes song. Now that one NEVER gets old. I could just sit here and play it over and over again... that's odd... one of my co-workers just shot himself...
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
Come on, post a link to the startup wav file for us wannabe rice-boy laptop owners! :-)
I used to work at Microsoft (no boos, please) and Rob used to claim he had tested software that we had announced but not developed yet. In other words, stuff that wasn't even in existence. He's an idiot.
I used to have an old 386 that must have had an unstable system clock. The benchmarks varied wildly, often showing unheard of 400 mhz speeds on a 16 mhz machine.
When you turned it on, the "beep" was often a wail or canary-like warble. The clock speed was so inconstant that it varied even at boot time, affecting the pitch of the beep.
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
Large "Type R" sticker on laptop.
".... I can say that it is definitely a stereo headphone jack. .."
Got news for you there, coach. Just because you get the VROOMVRROOOM noises out of both sides of the headphones - doesn't make it a stereo signal....just mono pumped to both ears.
But hey, you were the one "cool" enough to buy this one, so who am i to tell you about audio?
I can't believe you would just shit on the craftsmanship of Ferrari. Kids these days. Handle like a bar of soap? When/What model was the last one YOU drove Crockett.
You yawn when you see one? Who are you? Mika Hakkinen?
Go read your road and track and compare specs from the back you car nazi. There I have ended this conversation with my nazi reference. GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR!
I think if there's any way the Ferrari startup sound can be modified, people in Enderle's office will change it to:
1) "Welcome to my midlife crisis!"
2) "Step away from the vehicle! STEP AWAY!"
3) "Varoom! VaROOM! Va... oh, screw it."
4) "Tutto fumo e niente arrosto, baby!" (All smoke and no fire).
yeah yeah, we've all played Gran Turismo also.
bet you didn't turn the damage on tho did you?
I assume it was posted as a chance to make fun of Enderle. I like the part where he is afraid someone will fondle his laptop.
At least your insurance doesn't go up when this Ferrari crashes.
Why doesn't Jaguar make televisions?
The engineers can't figure out how to make them leak oil....
Ba da bum...
ho ho
Even when I'm in a meeting, I don't turn the sound off because of the unbridled envy that seems to show up in the eyes of my, granted mostly male, co-attendees. So far no one has complained.
No one has complained, maybe, because they are juniors to you. Did you realize that? They sure must be muttering "JERK" under their breath, anyways.
The best planning can be done after the project completes.
It is a bit unnerving when you are fixing something late at night, boot the fixed(sic) server while getting distracted with something else, and suddenly there is a woman just behind your ear saying "Replace the CPU!".
Q.
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