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SCO Names 1st Lawsuit Target: AutoZone [Updated]
An anonymous reader writes "News.com
reports that SCO has filed the first (of two) soon to be infamous lawsuits. This one is aimed against car part retailer AutoZone, a multi-billion, Fortune 500 company according to the site. Who's next?" Another reader excerpts from SCO's posted claim: 'AutoZone violated SCO's UNIX copyrights by running versions of the Linux operating system that contain code, structure, sequence and/or organization from SCO's proprietary UNIX System V code in violation of SCO's copyrights.'
Update: 03/03 16:28 GMT by T : njan writes with the news that SCO just announced during their ongoing conference call another lawsuit, this one "to be filed against Daimler-Chrysler, alleging that they are infringing SCO's copyright by using code relating to 'core operating system functionality' of SCO System 5."
Out of all of the companies that use Linux, I think they choose the most random company.
Is there a way to DDoS Darl's car? Hmmm...
The problem with socialism is that they always run out of other people's money. - Margaret Thatcher
...for fun and profit. I hope those of you considering startups are paying very close attention to SCO's revolutionary example. One day all business will be like this!
Autozone? This is way out of the typical "tech sphere"; I would have expected suits against other tech companies.
Now SCO is going to provoke the wrath of the automotive industry and enthusiasts; an entire new group of people to learn to hate SCO.
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
And hang them on your Linux box!
Maybe they think they have IP rights over Solaris =)
i am we todd did... i am sofa king we todd did
Lawsuit Zone!
SCO "believes" that AutoZone violated its license with SCO by using shared libraries? Of course, the evidence SCO must have on that one is piled high.
However, I "believe" that SCO is the biggest bunch of dumbasses around. My evidence for that is really piled high.
No trees were harmed in the composition of this; however, numerous electrons were inconvenienced.
SCO: you stole our stuff! ... like, our stuff. ...er? we need more info than that.
Autozone: what stuff?
SCO: you know
Autozone:
SCO: I could tell you but then i would have to kill you!
Psh... Linux, Unix, whatever. They should just be sued on the grounds that they encourage "ricing out" cars and have that terrible CG tire and jingle in their cable commercials.
Get in the zone... Aww - tow - zone! (We have lightbars for your shitty Honda Civic!)
A bunch of geeks from SCO and their lawyers (IAAL - we're all pencil-necked geeks, too) are taking on a bunch of greaser/gearheads who can call on their new spokesman biker/builder Monster Garage host Jesse James for help.
Those tatooed knuckles and huge guns of his could make short work of this fight.
The day after I get a job offer from AutoZone, they get sued by SCO. Great. Just fuckin' great.
- Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set him on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
Autozone has a market cap of 7.71 Billion US$. It appears that the only meritorious aspect of this action on SCO's part is that the bitch slapping they are going to get is going to be so hard and so thorough as to leave them unable to persue litigation against anyone else.
Would this qualify as extortion or racketeering?
Neither. Being that it's part of SCO's pump and dump scam I'd call it fraud.
Trolling is a art,
I've known 3 women who've been stalked by obsessive morons,
I see a pattern here.
*rim-shot*
---
Tricksy little McBridessss. They sued our precioussss!</obGollum>
Jesse James, Autozone's new spokesman. They will probably find all their tires slashed and the doors to SCO headquarters welded shut tomorrow morning.
Great ideas often receive violent opposition from mediocre minds. - Albert Einstein
Oh, so you have "SCO derivitave works" that were illegally used on Linux, too?
The living have better things to do than to continue hating the dead.
Man o Man...
They are going to get flamed to death for not using "GNU/Linux"....
Poor litigious bastards!
"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours." -- Yogi Berra
And also from the same page:
Since UnixWare is much more powerful, scalable and secure than Linux, customers may replace multiple Linux servers with a single, more powerful UnixWare server.
It's not amazing. It's amusing.
Autozone already has this covered. Over the last few years, they've been setting up Legal Defense Fund establishments all over the country. You can actually go into one of these LDF drop-off points, and give the nice people there some money. They will even give you one or more prizes in return! And if you really want, you can choose the actual prize, instead of just hoping for something good. These LDF dropoff points are in most major cities, and some small ones. Easily identified with the word AutoZone in large letters on the front of the building, usually in red neon.
They even have a website where you can do the same thing. Send in some money, help Autozone defeat the evil SCO, get a free prize to boot!
Donate your $$ today!
I'm beginning to wonder in all this... does SCO own part of Groklaw? Why else would they be feeding them such juicy stories all the time?! ;-)
Apologies to Ronnie and the Daytonas and their "GTO" song:
"Little SCO, youre really lookin fine
Three lawsuits and a make me pay $699
Listen to Darl yackin up now, listen to Darl why-ee-eye-ine
Cmon and turn it on, wind it up, blow it out SCO"
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
..watch out the next time you need a small fix for your car. Might be safer to buy a new one.
1. No sig. 2. ???? 3. Profit!!!
Today, Joe, regular Slashdot reader clicked on his favourite bookmark, read headline "SCO Names 1st Lawsuit Target: AutoZone" and emailed his buy-SCO-stock order to his broker without delay...
Later he was lucky to get into SCO's conference call, by that time he already threw away his pre-written astute remarks and only a silent "Thanks, Darl" could leave his lips.
I'm willing to bet their website had nothing at all to do with the decision to litigate.
They were probably the first people they found with a big picture ad in Yellow Pages.
AAA Auto Supplies will get caught on the second round.
Not in Slashdotland they don't!
I can just see it in the courtroom:
AutoZone: How do you know what we are running?
SCO: Ummmm
AutoZone: Shall I repeat?
SCO: Umm....Magic?
-Charlie
(Note: I know that isn't exactly what Nmap is for, but I thought it was funny and topical)
(Note2: Isn't is sad that disclaimers like this must exist on Slashdot for the sarcasm impared?)
you mean cars have parts ? like a computer?
Here is an interesting GrokLaw post from the man at AutoZone who helped them transition from UnixWare to Linux
not likely UnixWare, more likely OpenServer. But I don't really know, I'm just guessing based on the fact that lots of people use/used OpenServer for POS/inventory, whereas UnixWare is used for, uh, well, what is UnixWare used for anyway?
Schrodinger's cat is either dead or really pissed off...
Oh this is sweet - I want to see Darl face his acuse-ees - him toe to toe against the guys behind the counter at a bunch of AutoZones.
Can't wait for Darl's next impromptu sidewalk chat.
Who's the next lawsuit, Darl? Teamsters? Gold's Gym? California Governor's Office?
"Win treats sysadmins better than users. Mac treats users better than sysadmins. Linux treats everyone like sysadmins."
You see, I was a Sr. Technical Advisor at AutoZone... I initiated AutoZone's transition to Linux and I directed the port of their existing store software base to Linux. I personally ported all of AutoZone's internal software libraries for use under Linux
:-P
I see. Mr. Greer, meet Mr. Subpoena. Mr. Subpoena, Mr. Greer.
It was, in fact, SCO's activities that 'greased the skids' and allowed the business case for using Linux to be made more easily. That is a story long in the telling; perhaps I'll share it another day.
Yeah, yeah...tell it to the judge, Jim.
Thanks for the information. Our lawyers will be contacting your company by Friday.
Sincerly,
Darl
... that I will continue to talk out of my ass about things which I have no real knowledge of, and I will certainly not RTFA. This, however, will not affect any moderation.
you're all figments of my deranged imagination
In a better world, AutoZone would be in trouble over the cheesy car trinkets they sell, not for using Linux.
Please be Disney...
Please be Disney....
Please be Disney....
The first rule of Linux is... you do not talk about Linux.
The second rule of Linux is... you DO NOT talk about Linux!!!
Third rule of Linux: when SCO yells "stop", goes limp, taps out, the fight is over.
It's a one time opportunity to be worthy of a "I got sued by SCO" T-shirt
xb0x
(please at least consider it)
This case is so intertwined with the current SCO/IBM fight, I bet this will more likely be the case:
AZ: Hey IBM, we've been sued... we know your law department is currently handling our Plaintiff..
IBM: Yes, we know that
AZ: So, let's consolidate suits. Since your law department is more familiar with our Plaintiff, we could just pay you to litigate this for us
IBM: Good idea
*thinking*
IBM: You know what, I bet we could have both of these cases consolidated to the court that is trying our current case... wonderful idea
SCO: Oh FUCK....
I was under the impression that SCO lived in its own crazy little litigious world. I always assumed their world didn't have things like AutoZone.
Isn't Jesse James pimping for them now?
Can you imagine him in this new ad campaign?
"I use RedHat Enterprise Linux 3 at West Coast Choppers... because it's just wrong."
Followed by him driving away in his jet powered Toyota Supra, dragging a server behind him.
Hot Damn! It's the Soggy Bottom Boys!
This lawsuit is only a PR stunt in order to distract attention from today's SCOX 1Q statement. So let me post a short summary:
The SCOX 1Q seems to be highly correlated with SCOX IQ --- i.e. it totally scox.
Sincerely,
Pan Tarhei Hosé, PhD.
"Homo sum et cogito ergo odi profanum vulgus et libido."
It....was....a.....joke.
Rule number one - if you're going to make an example of a company for your petty little war, don't pick the company that will be selling you brake pads and brake lines next month:
Clerk : Will that be all, sir? Just this replacement brake master cylinder?
Darl : Yes, thank you.
Clerk : May I have your name, sir?
Darl : Darl McBride
Clerk : [typing] Oh... Uh huh... Actually this isn't the right part sir. We do happen to have this special one for you right here, which is EXACTLY what you need.
Darl : Good. Because I really want my brakes to work well.
Clerk : Oh yes sir, this will really do the trick.
On our next episode of "You Picked the Wrong Target", SCO's legal team picks Allied Colonoscope Corporation to make their next example.
And in two weeks on a very special edition of "Wrong Target", Darl suffers a heart attack and discovers and mutters the immortal line "I didn't know defibrillators ran on Linux".
It looks like it would have been better for them to short their OWN stock on this news. It's down a buck 27 this morning. Perhaps SCO investors are saying to themselves "Autozone? That's it? Effin Autozone?!?"
Next week's monster garage project will feature host (and autozone spokesman) Jesse James building a "Monster Car Crusher."
-Use of a "family owned" New Jersey Junkyard: 500.00
-2003 BMW with strange smell coming from the trunk and "l337SCO" California Plates: Freebee
Monster garage factoid: We swear our new sponsor deal with autozone had nothing to do with the making of this episode. we swear.
There are some people that if they don't know, you can't tell 'em.
SCO Reponse: Damn... now they're using free speech against us! What shall we do?
By what stretch of the imagination is CDE *not* "something goofy?" :)
Never did the name "anonymous coward" seem more appropriate.
choosing a victim with the correct pocket depth...
NEWS FLASH: Slashdot user AuT0Z0NE seen posting threatening messages daily including hot topics such as "Darl spanks his monkey" and "Darl, BRING IT ON, Sue me!" has had his identity revealed. Turns out he actually WAS CEO of Autozone. Stay tuned!
Mod +5 Drunk
...and let the poor guys running AutoZone's webserver decipher the symbolism of being sued by SCO and watching their store locator database server catch on fire in the same morning. Very subtle!
Dewey, what part of this looks like authorities should be involved?
I'm so lost. How is it possible that someone from Caldera -- which is now The Sco Group, came out to pitch his Linux products, and then after they go with someone else, sues them. But they didn't sue them for something illegitimate in the bidding or choosing of RedHat, but that the product (the same one they tried to sell to you) is "illegal".
I think crack dealers should use this strategy... "If you buy from someone other than me, I'll turn you into the cops for buying drugs".
sco, meet jesse james, autozone media darling.
jesse, meet sco, guys who wanna take money away from you.
sick em jesse. yer in the 'zone.
SCO Reponse: Damn... now they're using free speech against us! What shall we do?
:-)
Same we do every night, McBride: claim that it's outside the U.S. Constitution!
No, the "court of public opinion" instead wears a green robe with dollar signs embroidered on it.
Actually, that would be Rod Roddy. former announcer for The Price Is Right. He was always a little flamboyant with his clothes.
--You will rephrase your request for me to go to hell. Goto statements are not acceptable programming constructs
the joke news headline:
"Man Sticks Out Tongue between the bars of Wolf Cage at Local Zoo - bloody mess ensues".
Religion is the opium of the people. Evolution is the opium of scientists.
I wish Lee Iacocca Were alive to see this... He'd *skin* that punk McBride alive.
Oh, you said Mormon, not Moron. Well, I wouldn't know about that bit...
"Little does he know, but there is no 'I' in 'Idiot'!"
when the SCO body's has no pulse, videotape the dismemberment and ship the body parts to be incinerated. If you have the money, ship the ashes into space; barring that, place them in a lead-lined container and drop them in the deep Pacific.
SCO should looked at like Carthage; not only should they be annhilated, but the ground out of which they sprung should be salted over so that nothing else will ever come from it again. The more companies that think that SCO's business plan is a good idea, the less legitimate companies with legitimate claims will be able to seek relief, while more companies will be inhibited from doing useful saleable work. Nuke 'em till they glow, and then nuke 'em again, just to be sure.
I think crack dealers should use this strategy... "If you buy from someone other than me, I'll turn you into the cops for buying drugs".
Don't give SCO any more business ideas. I hear they're stocking some powerful shit. Though I guess they're too busy stealing from their own inventory to actually sell something.
Kjella
Live today, because you never know what tomorrow brings
but how freakin' cool is it when you do something so fast and so efficiently that the owners of Unix think you cheated
Depends if the "owners" of Unix are buffoons or not. If they are, its less cool, and more annoying.
...this one "to be filed against Daimler-Chrysler, alleging that they are infringing SCO's copyright by using code relating to 'core operating system functionality' of SCO System 5."...
In other news, Darl McBride, CEO of SCO, was unexpectedly killed yesterday when his vehicle's braking system inexplicably malfunctioned on I-40 yesterday...
May we never see th
The only choice for any company that is running SCO code on Linux is to switch back to SCO Unix and pay us our due royalties. Otherwise, its off to court you go!
- Darl
My favourite parts:
.... If It happened within the last 12 hours, I wouldn't be aware of it.... next question!"
Some guy: "Sooner or later this case will be decided upon by a court, and what will happen if at the end of all this it turns out you are wrong? there will be a lot of angry customers. Will you refund their money?"
Darl: "Well, errrr, we wo... umm, the way I see it is that, errr, well, "
and:
Some person: "Can you comment on the outstanding lawsuit against you"
Darl: "There are currently no lawsuits against SCO..."
Some Person: "One sec.... Australian company.... called CyberNight/Night... I have the information here."
Darl: "uhhh, ermm, ahhh, ermm
This is the final proof of Darl McBride's madness. DaimlerChrysler?! Does he have any idea how much trouble he's asking for? If McBride ever followed any of those "I drove 65 mph in a 25 mph zone, the wrong way down a one way street, and my 4-year-old son was unbelted in the front passenger seat, and he died in the crash because your airbag deployed too forcefully" lawsuits, he'd realize that the Chrysler Group has the meanest, most ornery, rabid pit bull lawyers to ever take a bar exam. And that's just the American half!
This sig intentionally left blank.
Surprisingly their stock is down already today, sco i mean. Yeah thats a big surprise. Darl: I didn't like my last Benz i bought so lets go after them.
Hey Darl don't fuck with the Germans you know they are good at fighting. Go after a French company if anything......might explain ev1 then "We know you have this code of ours that we won't tell you what is but we'll sue you if you don't buy our license" GivesheadSurfer "ok we surrender!"
Darl: Good morning. My name is Napol^H^H^H^H^HDarl Bonap^H^H^H^H^HMcBride and I'll be your host this morning. First order of business, we're going to be Invad^H^H^H^H^HSuing everyone in sight....
get away with such loose journalism
BRREEEEEEET!
I'm sorry, sir. I'm going to have to ask you to hand over your slashdot ID for violation of slashdot civil code 739395, "using the word 'loose' in its correct grammatical context."
I wouldn't want Bush to be re-elected even if he agreed to send me his twin daughters, a Guinness truck, Natalie Portman and a truckload of grits!
Gee, hmmm, I don't know. That's a tough bargain to beat, all for just a single vote. Would that truck be fully stocked, or are we talking about just the truck?
Fred
"A fool and his freedom are soon parted"
-RMS
Boies: Quick... to the Cease-and-Desist generator!
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder.
Free speech used as a weapon? MY GOD!
. . oops, too far, but close....Ashcroft,Bill,Connie,John...John, Ashcroft!
Let's see.....phone book, need to make a call, right...A's...yes.....Anderson....Applebees...Ass
Bingo.
Enter Darl McBride in his 2003 Jeep Cherokee. He's needing brakes and his monthly checkup:
Service: Well, well. MrMcBride. Why how are you? What can I do for you today?
Darl: Uh, I need brakes and my engine starts off sluggish. Whats your schedule like today?
Service: Hmmmm let me see . Yeah, we can fit you in right now. Hows that?
Darl Fine. Brakes gonna be a problem?
Service: Why, no problem at all. We'll just pop over to the AutoZone across the street and get their... Managers _Special_ Brakes.
Darl: Uhhh Ummmm ok, I guess. What about the engine? Need a tune up or something?
Service: Hmmmmmm . Looks as though you are not using original Jeep parts either. Cracked block. Warped camshaft. Mr. McBride, have you been putting any Alternative Parts on here?
Darl: Uhhhhh, no why do you ask?
Service: No matter. We have just the parts for you. See you at... six (6 6) Darl.
Just then dark clouds appear and we see a fade away shot of frightened Darl against a blood red sky, the serviceman transforming slowly into a minion of Satan. Swirls of orange and red light piercing through an ominous sky.
One more day in the life of Lindon UT -- the day Hell came to town.
The Twilight Zone.
INSERT INTO comment VALUE('Doh!') WHERE user='you';
Ahem - here in the United States, even judges don't wear black robes with "Judge" embroidered on it :-b
However, a few judges do wear orange jumpsuits with the word
on itRedundancy is good; triple redundancy is twice as good! - Me.
'til ol' McBride has a problem with his vehicle. He goes to Auto Zone:
"Well, if it ain't Mr. McBride. What can I do fer ya today?"
"I need some parts."
"Well, we can offer ya some parts, but ya gotta sign this here license agreement saying that you will not go to any other parts provider, and that you give us written proof that you never have. Otherwise, we'll sue you fer using our store."
The Penguin Producer
Only an idiot fights a war on two fronts. It takes a complete moron to fight a war on 5 fronts.
- Londo Molari
(Paraphrased a little). So SCO is now suing Novell, RedHat, IBM, AutoZone, and Chrysler. Then there's this matter of that Austrailian company suing SCO. Not to mention the German court case. These SCO boys are real f'd up.
"Destroy science and religion. Science would re-emerge exactly the same; but not religion." - Penn Jillette, paraphrased
So true. Which spawns a new idea in my head.... Now, we all know that our dear friend Darl will never have to answer for his dirty little deeds because of the way corporate leaders are protected in the US. So what are we going to do? We're going to launch a class action lawsuit against the one and only Darl Mcbride for defamation... You can't get a date? It's not cause you're a geek, it's not cause you're a nerd, it's all because you use linux and she heard Darl say linux users are jerks. You're wife/gf left you? It's not cause you spent too much time on slashdot, or spent the grocery money on that FX-51, it's cause you're a linux user and she heard Darl say slashdot readers are part of the Evil Empire... Getting the idea here? Everything wrong that happens from here on out in your life is Darl's fault... And he will pay, PAY i tell you! There. that'll get him.
Darl Mcbride to start amateur boxing career. His first opponents will be Mike Tyson, George Forman and Evander Holyfield.
When asked if he would honestly fight against these opponents, mr. McBride responded "Yes, after speaking with my counsels, the lawyers at Boies, we've determinated that these opponent would be perfect for me to initially test my skills. I applied my strategic expertise to the world of boxing, and these were natural matches, considering that these boxers are retired and I've been working out for 6 weeks".
Huh? Did I wake up in Bizarro world this morning?
"He who throws mud, loses ground." - proverb
It's loaded with grits, obviously.