City Officials Almost Ban Foam Cups

localhost00 writes "The city of Aliso Viejo, CA nearly banned foam cups when they learned they are produced from a substance known as 'dihydrogen monoxide.' A paralegal working for the city apparantly found a professionally designed web site put up to describe the dangerous properties of this chemical. Apparantly, the report about Dihydrogen Monoxide was written by a then 14-year-old Nathan Zohner who was researching the gullibility of fifty ninth graders."

Comments

Come on CA

[nberardi]

Tricked by a 14 year old, what is the government in CA comming too.

Re:Come on CA

[falcon5768]

well hey dont yell at us!!! I mean really who would want to live in a state that has mudslides, Earthquakes, and fires ON A GOOD YEAR

Re:Come on CA

[mattlary]

From the state who wants to ban the use of "Master" and "Slave" in hard drive designations... God I hate California

Re:Come on CA

[cybermace5]

You'll find that when they ban water and legalize marijuana, they're actually on crack.

Re:Come on CA

[DNS-and-BIND]

It's hell, living behind the Tofu Curtain. It's even tougher being the laughingstock of the nation. It's a good thing that we have Hollywood...the rest of the world actually *wants* to be like us.

Re:Come on CA

[mdielmann]

You're pretty optimistic. The article on snopes says one of the ninth-graders recognized it as water. Apparently, none of the officials did, otherwise it would have been stopped before they made complete asses of themselves.

I, OTOH, had my faith (or lack thereof) in bureaucrats confirmed.

Re:Come on CA

[hedge_death_shootout]

Honest mistakes are forgivable. But, exaggeration on the other hand, well I'm not so sure about that.

In fact, exaggeration is utterly unforgivable in all circumstances.

Re:Come on CA

[clambake]

Nice, law making officials have been put on the same level of discerning information as a class of high school freshman. This gives me great confidence in our legaslative bodies.

I KNOW! Isn't it great!?! I never in my life expected them to be as on the ball as high school kids.

Re:Come on CA

[troc]

Look, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate

Troc.

Re:Come on CA

[Anonymous Coward]

History records one fatality attributable to marijuana.

The unlucky fellow was unloading bales from a truck, when the whole lot came crashing down on him.

Re:Come on CA

[Sepper]

From the /usr/games/fortune database:

"Oxygen is a very toxic gas and an extreme fire hazard. It is fatal in
concentrations of as little as 0.000001 p.p.m. Humans exposed to the
oxygen concentrations die within a few minutes. Symptoms resemble very
much those of cyanide poisoning (blue face, etc.). In higher
concentrations, e.g. 20%, the toxic effect is somewhat delayed and it
takes about 2.5 billion inhalations before death takes place. The reason
for the delay is the difference in the mechanism of the toxic effect of
oxygen in 20% concentration. It apparently contributes to a complex
process called aging, of which very little is known, except that it is
always fatal.

However, the main disadvantage of the 20% oxygen concentration is in the
fact it is habit forming. The first inhalation (occurring at birth) is
sufficient to make oxygen addiction permanent. After that, any
considerable decrease in the daily oxygen doses results in death with
symptoms resembling those of cyanide poisoning.

Oxygen is an extreme fire hazard. All of the fires that were reported in
the continental U.S. for the period of the past 25 years were found to be
due to the presence of this gas in the atmosphere surrounding the buildings
in question.

Oxygen is especially dangerous because it is odorless, colorless and
tasteless, so that its presence can not be readily detected until it is
too late.
-- Chemical & Engineering News February 6, 1956"

Re:Come on CA

[nate1138]

California is the little kid who's parents never ever told him "no". Lex Luthor was right. Arizona Bay sounds like a dandy place to visit.

Re:Come on CA

[vandemar]

Exageration, unforgivable?! Where is your appreciation for stories?

It all makes sense now. All that stuff from Bush and co. about WMDs was really their contribution to the magical world of storytelling. Tuly a labor of love. The rest of the world should be so fortunate to have literary geniuses such as them in power.

You know they forgot...

[Azadre]

You know they forgot to put the word gullible in the dictionary right?

Re:You know they forgot...

[EvanED]

It really isn't in Dictionary.com..

No entry found for gullibl.

Did you mean gull ibl?
Suggestions:
gull ibl
gull-ibl
cullible
glibly

Re:You know they forgot...

[LO0G]

My wife's 5/6 grade class couldn't believe that it was a hoax when they went to http://www.buydehydratedwater.com so they ended up ordering some :)

It's sad what people will believe.

Re:You know they forgot...

[grub]

Heh, semi-related true story.

Years back I was a starving student working at a paint store. We jugged our own 4L paint thinners from large holding tanks out back. Anyhow, I jugged a few 4L containers of tap water. Then I printed out some nice labels that said "LATEX PAINT THINNER" with the usual comments about adding slowly, stirring well, etc.

Priced them at $3.99/4L and people would actually bring the up to the cashier. We'd tell them there that it was a joke so there was no ripping off done.

Re:You know they forgot...

[Anonymous Coward]

Well THAT was Un-American of you!

Yeah.. I'm a Canadian.. :)

Re:You know they forgot...

[Savage-Rabbit]

Years ago one of my biology teachers decided to crack a joke. After spending a long time explaining multi-cellular organisms and their evolution from single-cell organisms he asked the class:

"Will all the single cell organisms in the room please raise their hands!"

I was amazed to find my self as one of three kids not to do so, the entire rest of the class had a hand in the air. And people wonder why teachers suffer under a constant nagging feeling that they are wasting their time.

Dihydrogen Monoxide *is* dangerous

[Jonas the Bold]

Thousands of people die on beaches every year from DHM inhalation.

Re:Dihydrogen Monoxide *is* dangerous

[mgs1000]

...and 100% of all people who died last year were found to have significant levels of it in their bloodstream.

(That was a great episode of Penn & Teller's show,btw)

Re:Dihydrogen Monoxide *is* dangerous

[sosume]

Real geeks have known for long that getting DHMO on the skin can cause serious irritations and should therefore be avoided at all costs..

Re:Dihydrogen Monoxide *is* dangerous

[Fishstick]

We should ban it!! It is a major component of another hazardous product

1: More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread eaters.

2: Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.

3: In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever and influenza ravaged whole nations.

4: More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.

5: Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than that in one month!

6: Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low occurrence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease and osteoporosis.

7: Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after only two days.

8: Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter and even cold cuts.

9: Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.

10: Newborn babies can choke on bread.

11: Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.

12: Most American bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

Wow

[mdarksbane]

I hope no one tells them about the Pacific. We could be in serious trouble.

This stuff is nothing...l

[BigForbis]

Dihydrogen Monoxide is nothing. It's not very dangerous. The real kill is the Hydrogen Hydroxide. Closely related but much more dangerous. We should ban it first.

Re:This stuff is nothing...l

[Mateito]

Yeah.. get enough Hydrogen Hydroxide together and you end up with a shit load of H+ and OH- ions... effectively like burning yourself with acid then pouring bleach over the wound.

It MUST be true!

[pablo_max]

In my experience they dont allow things on the internet that are not true. Case in point I will be getting a check from Bill Gates real soon as I have done my part and forwarded his email.

Just came in

[ziggamon]

Latest news: the 14-year old has just been hired by SCO as their new "information minister"

Worker's Comp

[lukewarmfusion]

I need to sue my employer now. I've been exposed to DHM for many years now, and I fear that it may be taking its toll on me. I've noticed many more wrinkles after particularly long sessions, not to mention a slickness to my skin.

Ah, the perils of lifeguarding.

DHM

[Anne Thwacks]

I though SCO had a patent on DHM? Then again, maybe it was IBM?

Almost...

[steveorama]

"City Officials Almost Ban Foam Cups"

And this is almost news...

Re:Almost...

[wintermute740]

"And this is almost news..."

Almost news for almost nerds. Stuff that almost matters???

A poem.

[eigerface]

Little Johnny was a chemist.

Little Johnny is no more.

'Cause what he thought was H2O.

Was really H2SO4

Ummm, the state of California...

[Anonymous Coward]

This product is known to the state of California to cause an unknown disease.

The state of California is an unknown disease.

Re:They SHOULD ban styrofoam

[Lord_Frederick]

Yes, but it keeps my coffee so toasty warm!

The fifty-ninth grade

[Chillum]

"...researching the gullibility of fifty ninth graders."

You'd think when they'd been in school THAT long, they wouldn't be so gullible!

Re:Why does this surprise me it is in California?

[onyxruby]

Reminds me of an oxygen canister I saw at home depot a little bit ago. It carried a warning label on it stating that oxygen was known to cause cancer in the state of california. This label was about as big as the one letting you know that it was flammable.

Nah. The really deadly stuff

[Moderation abuser]

Hydroxylic acid...

It makes dihydrogen monoxide look like water in comparison...

Re:Why does this surprise me it is in California?

[Mad_Rain]

Reminds me of the advice of one of my professors - "Live on the East Coast for a while, but be prepared to leave, because for every year you live out there, you get more cynical. Live on the West Coast for a while, but be prepared to leave, because for every year you live out there, you lose an IQ point."

My new career: Supermodel

[Futurepower(R)]

I learned a lot from the recent election in California. I learned that you can get a job even when you have no qualifications. So, I've decided to be a supermodel.

Re:Why does this surprise me it is in California?

[whiteranger99x]

Ah quit your bitching! As a Californian speaking, I'm proud to say that our state will literally break off from the rest of the US anyway....maybe to hang out with Hawaii. Alaska can come too.

Re:They SHOULD ban styrofoam

[p4ul13]

Explaining the joke: Effectively sucking the humor out of a gag since 1982.

Styrofoam is easy to recycle

[Stonent1]

I always place it on the head of an unsuspecting river otter and pour acetone on it. It instantly disintegrates and the otter whisks the remains away to a recycling center.

It is nasty stuff unless properly diluted

[jhines]

dihydrogen monoxide is nasty thing, which can harbor bacteria and other nasty things to you.

It is best to dilute it slightly with ethanol, as this kills the bugs.

Adding hops, barley, yeast, and letting it mix for a while is a very good way of adding the ethanol.

Re:They SHOULD ban styrofoam

[Tassach]

Don't forget the aluminum and/or magnesium powder in your recipe. Without that addition, your sticky gas/styrofoam mixture isn't particuarly effective.

Re:They SHOULD ban styrofoam

[Peale]

Christ, do I have a story about that. Luckily nothing bad came of it.

I used to have this idiot friend Mike when I was a kid (14 or so). I was a freshman in high school, and he was a grade below me (in middle school).

One day I was showing him just that; taking styrofoam and disolving it in gasoline makes a pretty nice fire display. We had our fun in the backyard, and left the rest in a bucket outside.

A month goes by. Mike calls me up asking if he can have what's left in the bucket. I say sure, why not.

Now the styrofoam we used was the green stuff that veggies and meat are served in, so when we started it was a nice green slime. Now it had the consistency of Play-Doh.

I thought nothing of this, until the next day, @ lunch, when there was a schoolwide announcement: "WOULD ARTHUR PEALE PLEASE COME TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE IMMEDIATELY!" yes, those capital letters are there to display the fact that they were SHOUTING into the microphone, as well as having turned the volume almost all the way up on the PA system.

I head to the main office, and the secretary looks at me and says, "Oh, you're in trouble now, Arthur! Go see Mr. Perry, the Vice Principal."

I enter his office, and that's when I notice the two uniformed police officers standing there. They invite me to have a seat.

At this point I have no clue what's going on, until one officer says "Arthur, I'd like to see your license to make explosives, please."

I, of course, being 14, did not have one. I was clueless about what was going on, until they mentioned a green substance that a "Mike Parsons" had brought to school, and had been lighting out in the parking lot with some friends of his.

Aparently word got around to what he was doing, someone approached a teacher, the police and fire department were called, along with a bomb unit. The stuff looked so strange and alien they had no clue what kind of explosive it was. It was being treated very gingerly.

After I told the officers what it was, they told me that they weren't going to press charges. Mike got a week suspension, and I went back to class.

Symptoms

[phorm]

After long sessions of dealing with infected MS machines, I can tell you truthfully that they do cause extreme illness with symptoms including:

a) Increased heartrate, anger
b) Sweaty palms
c) Migraines
d) Vision impairment

Of course, other OS's aren't so great either... I've noticed a trend of body odour and poor social tendancies that seem to afflict Linux users, and the Mac users generally seem to suffer from some form of uncomfortable constipation issue.

Re:You know they forgot one more

[Phat_Tony]

One more similar hilarious joke site:

Creationist Science Fair