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Microsoft's Magical 'Myth-Busting' Tour
Mz6 writes "Microsoft has launched its 'Get the Facts' road show -- the tech equivalent of a political battle bus -- to tour the country and convince the wavering that Redmond is as at least cheap and as secure as its open-source rival and to spread the word that Windows is better than Linux. Nick McGrath, Microsoft's head of platform strategy, described the campaign as 'a reality check we're bringing out', aiming to tackle the 'myths' surrounding Linux. Microsoft's road show will be in Edinburgh on June 17, Manchester on June 29 and Newport on July 7."
[stands on soapbox]
...um... nevermind, got a bit carried away there. :)
Tux for President! Penguins for software reform! Web browsers for welfare mothers! Put Bill on trial for his crimes!
pb Reply or e-mail; don't vaguely moderate.
"La-La-La-La-Myth-Busting-Tour!
Nick,
This word 'reality', I do not think it means what you think it means.
Oh, wait...
Quo usque tandem abutere, Nimbus, patientia nostra?
I'll burn off some Knoppix cd's and Crash the party!
(will they have booth babes?)
In the future, I would want to not be isolated from my friends in the Space Station.
RJR and Phillip Morris unveiled their plans for a traveling road show to promote cigarettes as an effective weight loss solution as well as a stimulant and antidepressant.
Interociter
-=What do I want? I'm an American. I want more.
I was hoping this was going on in the US...it would be fun to attend. If only to jeer and heckle.
Hopefully some British LUGs will be on the case.
Knowledge is power. Knowledge shared is power multiplied.
>Redmond is as at least cheap and as secure as its open-source rival
Yes, and I am as at least rich as Bill Gates.
Andrej
Hello,
Windows is the best OS, you know. If you use it, you find it makes your mind processes improve all the time, it teaches you how to temple your nerves when something goes wrong (very often, I mean)... and it's much more beautiful (there's something magical in that funny blue screen, don't you think so?)
Muaaaaaaaaaks
--
You'd stumble in my footsteps (Depeche Mode, "Walking in my shoes")
New definition of wardriving huh M$?
Error: Id10t detected
... and bound to be much more educational than this other one.
Magic School Bus
Besides, Ms. Frizzle be the schnizzle dizzle!
I only look human.
My mother is a halfling and my dad is an ogre, so that makes me an Ogreling
This just in...
Apparently Microsoft's tour bus crashed because of a faulty driver.
Unknown host pong.
Cheap as in "look at all the free software that gets downloaded to your computer" cheap. Or maybe cheap as in the type of shots that will be flying around here soon :-)
I Am My Own Worst Enemy
DEVELOPERS Developers developers developers! I want you to go to Arizona, or New Mexico, or Oklahoma, or Delaware, or South Carolina, or North Dakota. Viva New Mexico!! YIIEEHAAA!!!!!!! -Steve Ballmer
"There is no spoon." - The Matrix
Microsoft is severely threatened and it knows it. Pay no attention to it and it will eventually go away.
People in Soviet Russia, however, appear to be afflicted with amusing juxtapositions of the aforementioned situation.
A programmer is a machine for converting coffee into code.
Say what you want about cigarettes, I never wanted to strangle Joe Camel. Clippy on the other hand...
___
It's the end of my comment as I know it and I feel fine.
Read the report (2.12 MB Microsoft Word file)
Ironically if it wasn't for the pile of open source tools that can read that on my harddrive right now, I would have to go spend about $600 just to read this file (think OS+Office+new machine to run the OS).
I Am My Own Worst Enemy
I bet that their battle bus is really just one of those short yellow buses.
Definitely gotta love...
A) Novell buys a bunch of Linux companies and suddenly their executive is the authority on what open-source "is".
B) Nawwww. Oh, no, there's never any 'let's trash something someone else has done'! Perish the thought!
Speaking of which, Microsoft sucks, SCO sucks, Sun sucks, Apple sucks. Also: KDE sucks, GNOME sucks, Debian sucks, Red Hat sucks, 2.4 kernels suck, vi sucks, emacs sucks, Cowboy Neal sucks.
What I'm listening to now on Pandora...
Hey, I'm invulnerable to those jedi mind tricks!
I ordered a couple copies of the "Windows vs Linux Evaluation Kit".
One for "For Gondor Solutions". My job title in that company is Aragorn.
Another for "Mordor (the Land of Shadow) Development". My job title in that one is Sauron.
I wonder if they'll notice?
MYTH 1) Linux is actually a pleisiosaur from the cretatious period living in a lake in Scotland.
FACT: Linux is an operating system kernel.
MYTH 2) In Mandarin Chinese, the phrase GNU/Linux, loosely translated, means "Bit the wax tadpole."
FACT: Linux is developed by hard working, intelligent programmers who submit their source code to a community repository, where fans of the operating system can retreive, adapt, and download the kernel at their leisure.
MYTH 3) In 1953, a saucer full of Linux crashed landed on a farm in Roswell, New Mexico.
FACT: Linux is used in solutions from many of the top software firms around the world, including IBM and Sun Microsystems. Because of its open codebase, it is easy to adapt to just about any hardware configuration without costly customizations.
MYTH 4) Douching with Linux directly after sex prevents pregnancy and/or veneral disease.
FACT: Linux installations make up as much as five percent of the desktop computers in active use, and as much as 80% of webservers.
MYTH 5) Linux is a quality server operating system but still kind of a shoddy platform for everyday usage due to a number of conflicting desktop standards, graphical toolkits and a tireless devotion to supporting underpowered legacy systems rather than creating a single, modern standard. Attempts to critique this obvious shortcoming are met with an intensely emotional tirade that neither solves the inherent problem nor serves to edify the critic.
FACT: Actually, this is entirely true.
Hey freaks: now you're ju
The Flatlander
would read:
"All your bus are belong to us"
Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
for the internationally-impaired, the tour is in the UK.
Which is strange as the myth that's upset them most, Myth Pamela Joneth, is in the US.
I'm looking forward to when they drive to the US.
Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but copyright will always protect me.
they are all in Englandshire, well, except Edinburgh, which is in Scotlandshire, and Newport which is in upstate Cymru. You will find Englandshire on your map, just off the coast of New York
for the internationally-impaired, the tour is in the UK.
Where is this UK you speak of?
We American have never fought a war with UK so that why I don't know where it's at.
What? Me fail history and geography? That's umpossible!
Moneyed corporations, non-working 'poor' and criminal prisoners are turning productive citizens into tax-slaves.
MS Rep: Microsoft is now more secure than ever, not to mention our proven track record of security in the past.
Person 1: Hasn't your security been laughed at in the past?
MS Rep: Microsoft's NT and 2000 platforms set the ground work for our current XP OS.
Person 1: Maybe, but hasn't your Windows 95, and 98 OS's been nothing but trouble?
Person 2: Yeah and what about Millenium?
MS Rep: Windows 95 and 98 are just older and so are not supported anymore, I have no idea what this Millenium is you speak of.
Person 2: What are you talking about of course you do I have a install disk righ there.
MS Rep2: We don't know what you are talking about, security please escort this man out.
Person 3: Hay what about the bug reports on IE that occur every week.
MS Rep: Ok will security please escort out all the slashdot and wired readers, thanks.
MS Rep: So what do we think of MS now?
MS Rep2: I think its great
Ave Molech Setting
Bill,
Nice post. You are teh kewl.
Steve
n/t
If there's one thing that Reagan has taught us, is that truth always beats falsehoods.
I don't remember that.
Hit the road Bill. And don't ya come back no more, no more, no more, no more. Hit the road Bill, and don't ya come back no more.
I wish they would do another tour in Flanders. I would know what to wear.
what to bring along.
And where to get someone to get me out of prison again.
...Microsoft has announced that FUD 2004, their flagship product, is almost ready for launch.
The U.S. Constitution needs to be ammended with a "separation of business and state" clause.
windows - $4600 per server
redhat - $1000 total
Telling your boss you're using Windows or Linux or whatever else (s)he wants to hear when you're really using FreeBSD - priceless.
( sorry, had to be done =P )
Not yet.
But, uh, you wouldn't know if they might have, well, oil there, would you?
"Prepare for the worst - hope for the best."
I'd say the odds were pretty much zero.
The only thing that could save MSFT now is a fully operational death star.
That's our life, the big wheel of shit. - The Fat Man, Blue Tango Salvage
Actually you have. It was the War of Independence, and the US fought *on the same side as France!*
Oolite: Elite-like game. For Mac, Linux and Windows
They might make it; sounds like they got the right kind of drugs going already. Coupla more hits and they'll make it.
Slashdot: Failed Car Analogies. Amateur Lawyering. Anecdote Battles.
I guess you're not familiar with Novell's marketing department...
No... they finally realized Word keeps track of prior edits and they did not want everyone to find out the real goodies.
My karma is not a Chameleon.
Just in case this latest tour doesn't work, I'd like to offer some suggestions for Microsoft's marketing department for future promotions:
g ineer certification, which is in effect, a room where they strap people to chairs a la "A Clockwork Orange" and show them a never ending stream of Steve Balmer video speeches.
* Produce a study that reveals "Linux users have smaller penises"
* Include free Windows 2000 server license in new McDonald's Happy Meals.
* Purchase one of the Internet backbone providers and start refusing to process packets from non-Microsoft networks.
* Offer Microsoft-Certified-Linux-Professional-Systems-En
* Release "Windows For Linux" desktop which at first appears to be a window manager, but actually removes Linux and installs Server 2000.
* Start rumor that Linus Torvalds is a member of Al Quaeda.
* Get patent on common sense and free thinking and charge all Linux users with IP infringement.
* Update scripts of upcoming Star Wars and Harry Potter movies to show that Darth Vader and Valdemort are "powered by Linux."
Nothing some Laughing Cow cheese and mescaline can't solve.
My karma is not a Chameleon.
Well, maybe they understand that the SCO thing didn't work, and now they have to have to do their dirty work themselves... as themselves, in true extra kitchy Microsoft style.
Just once it would be great if they could come up with an original idea. Unfortunately, they seem to have ripped off another one.
I wonder if Ballmer said, "You know, those Republicans are being too innovative. I think it's time to steal their thunder with a tour bus of our own. Yes... get on it right away Chris Sharp, you former Red Hat Whipping boy whore!!! Get on it, bitch!" "But my name's Nick McGrath, sir." "Whoever."
And the Diabolical Microsoft Bus of Destruction, was born! CRASH thunder and lighting, que dramatic music!
Na, probably not.
This signature has Super Cow Powers
Get a bull-horn and some men and women in bikinis to hand out the free CD's.