Slashdot Mirror
Fiat Joins Microsoft in a Wireless Partnership
bizpile writes "The AP is reporting that Microsoft and Fiat have gotten together to develop a system of wireless communications into Fiat's vehicles. The goal of the alliance, announced Thursday, is to create a flexible, easy-to-use telematics system (think OnStar from General Motors) for Fiat and its Lancia and Alfa Romeo brands sold in Europe, the companies said."
Does this mean that I can hack away at somebodies car? I hope it has a bit more security then the usual Microsoft products. And do I need to run Windows Update every week if I have such a system in my car?
Disclaimer: This opinion was created without the use of any facts
Driving around on a hot summer day in your Fiat, with your Windows wide open......
This Fiat/Microsoft article reminded me of an old gem:
For the sake of argument, let's nickname this service Pwn3d-Star, so I guess this is your Fiat updated version!
1. Every time the server-side software is upgraded, you'll have to buy a new car.
2. When your Fiat dies on the freeway randomly, you can now be told by a Pwn3d-Star agent that you have to restart it. They would also say nice things and pepper MS branding through the whole conversation.
3. If your car failed to restart after one weird maneuver (like backing up too quick), the new Pwn3d-Star agents will tell you that they will send a tow-truck to you for an extra surcharge, and that your engine will need to be replaced.
4. You can now have more than one person in the car, but they will all need their own license to use Pwn3d-Star, even if they are dying on the road.
5. Macintosh will not do this, but if they do, it will be 100x better and have a super-iPod built in. You'll be able to download music without leaving your car, which is great for many car geeks, although Fiats aren't that popular among car geeks.
6. (this one didn't change) The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.
7. (strangely this one didn't change either) People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for many years.
8. We will have to get Microsoft gas to run the vehicle, or a Pwn3d-Star agent will tell us that the gas we are purchasing is not Microsoft Certified, and we may be in violation of our warranty if we continue to use said gas.
9. New seats will force everyone to have the same sized butt. Pwn3d-Star will warn you if someone's butt is too big or small.
10. The airbags will now say "Are you sure?" before deploying. (pretty much the same as the original)
11. If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened, but the Pwn3d-Star agent would tell you that techsupport is working on an explanation. Then you would get some excellent elevator music for about a half hour as you cling to life.
The dangers of knowledge trigger emotional distress in human beings.
In Germany FIAT stands for
Für Italien ausreichende Technik
(for Italy adequate technique)
or
Fehler in allen Teilen
(Fault in all parts)
No better partner than Microsoft.
FIAT was "Fix It Again, Tony"
Will they change it to RIAT? Reboot it again, Tony...
Although Tony the Mechanic will have much less work to do. Hell, you can do it yourself.
Roll down all the windows, then roll them all back up. Then turn off your car, wait 2 minutes, and turn it on again. Ta-da! Your problem is fixed.
Small potatoes make the steak look bigger.
You look at the story, and think 'wireless telematics? (a) why? (b) eek, scary.'
But in fact it appears this doesn't really have a lot to do with conventional auto telemetrics:
From the arcticle:
The Microsoft/Fiat system, expected to be available in vehicles next year, will be based on standard hardware and operate with Microsoft Windows Automotive software. Using the short-range digital wireless communications standard known as Bluetooth, it will allow motorists to integrate their cell phones and personal digital assistants with the onboard system.
Drivers also will be able to access digital music stored in personal electronic devices through a USB connection in the dashboard, as well as other information."
So what we have here is a way of ensuring that (presumably MS-based) music players and (presumably MS-based) PDAs will be able to link in.
It's notable that they are planning to use USB for music (so no iPods).
So in reality, not really as scary, or indeed as interesting/innovative as it could have been.
And not because of Microsoft (yet). The article states that they are hoping to halve their operating losses to 500 million euros this year. Which means their loss in 2003 was (gasp!) 1 billion euros. Which I guess is why Microsoft was able to 'partner' with them. Fiat gets the technology for free, and Microsoft gains an entry into the market.
And the technology is nothing revolutionary. It's basically a Bluetooth connection to "integrate cell phones and PDAs with the onboard system" (??) and an USB connection so you can play your iPod music on the car's audio system.
Despite what you may think, Onstar is not a General Motors product. It was simply their idea, which they then outsourced to none other than Motorola. Although most people don't know it, Onstar is completely built, designed and tested by Motorola. The only part of Onstar they don't run is the call center.
Look at it a different way; Microsoft is a billions of dollars a year company that wants to try out something new. They have the clout and (some might argue this) the expertise to try it.
New markets, new areas like this will have a lot of problems that need to be solved, and although we love to hate them, MS's millions being injected into this will be a good thing, make other people sit up and take notice and - most importantly - improve on it.
This is good news for Formula 1 fans. Ferrari (a part of Fiat Group) is doing great in Formula 1. So great, that they have made Formula 1 very very boring for spectators. Everybody knows in advance that Ferrari wins every GP. The biggest advantage of Ferrari is its reliability. But not for long. Not after this.
1974 called: it wants its joke back.
/.ers) FIAT's not the company it was way back when they were selling cars over there, their output is actually pretty damned good these days, mechanically that is - this move is likely to mean really sucky in-car electronics
seriously though (for the benefit of all you state-side
1. ABS
2. Fuel Injection
3. Engine timing
4. Automatic Transmission (or ratios in stick models)
5. Airbag deployment
6. Cruise control
7. Door locks
And before you mod me down for being a paranoid tinfoil-hatted troll read about the Phillipine minister who was trapped in his BMW that refused to unlock and let him out? The HAL-in-a-car was very likely a Microsoft Telematic system.
They can mess all they want with the radio - I'll be switching it off listening to my iPoD anyway :)
See that long UID - that's what you get for lurking too long
jebus, can't MS have ONE ORIGINAL THOUGHT? Apple partners with BMW/Voltswagon and now MS has to find a car manufacturer to partner with. Not bashing for bashing's sake, but man, can't they just come up with SOMETHING on their own once in a while?
RTFA, they are leeching an idea, but it's not off Apple. Apple's partnership was to promote iPod music in the car. MS is leeching off GM's onstar this time...
I am sick of all this crap microsoft is doing, when are they going to get their sh*t together and put out a REAL product, like some sort of breakfast cereal, with little marshmallow bill gates heads. yum
... Fix It Again, Tony!
It's only fitting that they partner up with MicroSoft.
So does the car cease to function after 30 days if you fail to activate it?
how 'bout I give you the finger....and you give me my phone call.