Slashdot Mirror
Cleansing Hardware Of Dead Pig Odors?
Chagatai writes "My company is one of America's largest beef and pork producers. Recently I took a trip to see a new computer room that had been built at one of our abbatoirs. While the new environment is nice and sanitary, the old computer room had air intakes that were adjacent to the rendering portion of the plant, and everything smells in an almost unholy way. Management is curious if there are any cleaning agents or means of deodorizing this equipment before moving it into the nice, new office. The only products I could find would clean the outside of the hardware, but the internals would still possess the lovely aroma of boiled dead pig parts. Of course, this is a race against time, as I am sure someone will inevitably squirt Pine-Sol into the system to try to make things better. Does anyone have any recommendations to remove the effluvium of post-mortem porcine matter from our machines?"
You're missing a prime chance to pull a real stunt.
One word: Ebay.
Put it all up for auction simultaneously, and watch the fun as people get their newly won purchases. I'd love to read that feedback. "Great PowerEdge, but I've never had computer equipment smell unholy before." And then, watch mass psychology at work as people read each other's feedback from the same vendor and start to put two and two together.
The only thing funnier would be to work at Paypal and hear people squirm as they try to justify asking for a refund. "You gotta believe me, this disk array smells bad. Really bad. Like dead meat bad."
What's your damage, Heather?
Try HOLY WATER, you murderer!
Bravo.
Ryan T. Sammartino
"Ancora imparo"
Guess it's time for 3M to create a solvent version of Fluorinert.
Actually, you've got a great (albeit expensive) single-machine solution right there: run the machine in a tub of Fluorinert. Presto, no smell is going to escape that liquid.
Wouldn't work for a data center, unless of course you wanted to run it inside a pool and send your techs in with scuba gear. And at that point, you might as well just run the data center in a normal room - but send the techs in with scuba gear, and they won't smell the funky servers because they'll be wearing scuba gear.
What's your damage, Heather?
If you can't come up with a solution, I suggest donating the equipment to PETA...
You can't talk about Wikipedia's flaws on Wikipedia
He also had sticky keys from God knows what
Hmmmm...
*scratches chin*
Free XBox, PS2
Gives new meaning to the phrase Render Farm, now doesn't it?
Why not indeed.
Whenever I encounter a system that smells of dead meat I just wipe it & install linux.
-- MarkusQ
P.S. for the humour impared: this is a joke.
The smell of a rendering plant will be hard to remove, but this is how I remove the "beef scent" from tallow when I'm making soap.
Tyler Durden? Is that you!!!
Wow, this will be a great article for the trolls. You're sure to see a lot of ridiculous posts here.
You're also probably going to get a lot of serious suggestions about rubbing alcohol and vapor-based cleaning. These are likely to help, but not do it 100%, and they require either a lot of labor or shipping everything to an expensive cleaning company.
So let me tell you what did where I was working several years back. I was working with the FBI, on a special mission in Russia to help their law enforcement agencies upgrade security in former nuclear weapons facilities. Now, it wouldn't surprise anyone to hear that a certain facility that will remain unnamed, somewhere in the middle of Siberia, only a day or two's drive from a certain site of civil war, had an incident that wasn't properly cleaned up. We arrived at the main computer lab to find a dozen corpses that had been there for a year and a half. And despite the Siberain weather that can freeze spit before it hits the ground, the bodies in the bunker hadn't been frozen.
After getting a couple new gas masks for the guys that really should've skipped lunch before going down there, we discovered that the computers were overrun with, well, you don't want to know. Let's just say it was fuzzy and came in colors I'd never seen before. Even after the room was disinfected nobody could stand to go down there without a mask. Though one of the Russians suggested using it as a gas chamber to execute criminals, until we briefed him on the Geneva Convention. But we couldn't just throw the machines away-they included supercomputers and large clusters full of nuclear weapons research. The science team had to go through all of it with a fine-toothed comb.
So what did we do? Simple-seal everything off! We too a bunch of plastic covers and created an airtight seal around all the computers, with only monitors, keyboards, and mice outside. A ventilation system pumped cold air into the huge computer tent. It was ugly as hell, but worked quite effectively.
So, if your offices don't mind having interior decorating issues, a bunch of strong plastic, industrial glue, and lots of duct tape can solve the problem. Until somebody want to upgrade or do maintenance, of course. God help that poor bastard.
Really, it's the only way. Nothing smells quite like a rendering plant and nothing gets it out. That smell is composed of volatile hydrocarbons which come out of the meat when it's cooked, and they get into anything porous -- even the surfaces of "solid" plastics. Insulation, wood, sheetrock, and even plastic that has been around that smell for any length of time will have that distinctive smell forever.
Brackets contain world's first nanosig, highly magnified:[.]
" I'm sure they'll appreciate it"
I got a better idea.. saudi arabia...
Online backup with Mozy, sounds like Ozzie, but more!
Donate them to developing countries (like iraq) and pocket a tax break.
Like, how about not donating them to a country primarily filled with muslims. Pork, ya know.
With reasonable men I will reason; with humane men I will plead; but to tyrants I will give no quarter. -- William Lloyd
Wow, this will be a great article for the trolls. You're sure to see a lot of ridiculous posts here. . . . I was working with the FBI, on a special mission in Russia . . .
LOL. Okay, that was ridiculous. Nice troll - the guy that modded it insightful is probably out waxing his Yugo now.
Let me try. There is no way you're going to rid the equipment of the stench unless you sacrifice a PETA member and cremate the remains in the room with the equipment. The smoky holiness will counteract the "unholy" residue mentioned. It works doubly well if the PETA member is a virgin. The only side-effect is that all subsequent users of the equipment will become politicized vegetarians (well, that and the ashes all over everything).
Wouldn't it be 99% poison?
Analogies don't equal equalities, they are merely somewhat analogous.
You make your own soap?
I think we need to swap recipes. I've got some other things you might be interested in.
E-mail me a tylerdurden@aol.com
Hope to hear from you soon.
Or Iran....
Summary- wipe everything down with alcohol, trash anything painted along with the PSUs. I once let a friend borrow a system for several months-what I did not know what this his roomates were smokers and slobs, and the computer came back covered in a layer of brownish goo. I carefully cleaned off everything that I could with alcohol on q-tips and toothbrushes, washed the case with lysol, and let it all dry.
Most of the parts ended up well-cleaned and generally stink free. Unfortunately, the power supply was uncleanable without a total dissasembly that would have rendered it unusable, and the while the case appeared clean, once it warmed up it stank just as bad as before; as far as I can tell it was just some weird feature of the paint that kept me from getting the stink out.
Since I couldn't fit an Antec server case in the dishwasher, I wrote it off as a loss, tossed it out, put the parts in a new case, and donated it to my college-student sister.
I've seen the commercials. The drugs in that stuff keep people opening their closets for another snort until they faint and fall over.
One line blog. I hear that they're called Twitters now.
You may be stuck with the stench. OK, random bad jokes : give them to PETA/ADL/vegan society. Give them to Cowboy Neal, no one will notice them over his stench.
;)
Let's not forget, if you bring them to a tightly packed LAN party, no one can tell the difference between the addicted gamers and the PCs that reek of rotting pig parts
Join the TWIT army now!
Wouldn't work for a data center, unless of course you wanted to run it inside a pool and send your techs in with scuba gear.
Hot damn! My techs smell worse than the gear -- anyone know how long they last underwater? (they're all MCSEs)
slashdot: where everyone yells sarcastic metaphors to themselves to understand the issue
Siberia is not Russian and is no where near Siberia fuckwit, nor has it had a civil war
Siberia is Russian, and is in fact very, very close to Siberia.
And by the way, if Siberian geography is the most dubious point you found in the parent post, life is going to give you many problems.
That Enzyte not to be confused with this Enzyte...
jX [ Make everything as simple as possible, but no simpler. - Einstein ]
You call up the government's Plastic Computer Socket Information Bureau, ZIF Division, of course. How else?
The higher the technology, the sharper that two-edged sword.
Now before you all get mad, I'll explain.
It's just that MCSEs have to have a larger lung capasity to explain around all of Window's problems, ending up blaming the user, whereas the Linux tech will just up and blame the user.
simple as pie!
Game Overdrive - Gaming News
Get techs who chain-smoke.
They'll mask the pig stench within a week.
-J
Sorry, but...I'm going to have to ask. Are you the guy who bought all the Heaven's Gate computers at police auction?
MCSEs? You might have a problem. I think witches either float or melt in water. Either way, there is no way they'll be able to get to the server.
Probably a good thing.
Hold on there big guy - you just might be onto something with that pool idea.
Instead of just using the pool to clean your data center, you could double it up as a liquid cooling system! Plus, you have a something to do for recreation during breaks. Forget about boring talks at the water cooler, just jump in your data center for a swim!
(Maybe if you use some sorta Jello liquid. I don't think Jello is conductive, and then you could also drink it, which means you could also trash your water cooler, saving your company further money!)
...Had this been an actual emergency, we would have fled in terror, and you would not have been informed.
... pork whiskers! Eventually the hardware will fritz out due to the accumulated pork whiskers and you'll have to replace it anyway. Problem solved.
I'd have a personalized plate on my car, but "toxic bachelor" won't fit into 7 letters.
You work for Compaq, don't you?
The dead fucking the pigs would be an improvement? Man, those conventions you go to are Hentai , not Anime. I guess nobody just informed you of the subtle difference yet...