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Green Security Clearance Laser Pistol Available

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the insert-remaining-eye-joke-here dept.

nazgul000 writes "You thought those green laser pointers sold by ThinkGeek and others were pretty cool, didn't you? Well, think again." It seems obligatory to point out that even laser pointers, and certainly anything more powerful than those, are capable of causing real damage.

21 of 586 comments (clear)

  1. way different lasers by ack154 · · Score: 5, Informative

    Ok... let's compare.

    Lasershoppe.com Laser: >100mW (one tested was 191!)
    Thinkgeek.com Laser: 5mW

    Yes... there is a 20x difference in power here (about 38x with the tested one). While lasers in general can be harmful, the one this guy is selling should really be considered a weapon.

    Also worth noting about the lasershoppe one: "this laser is not legal to use in public."

    1. Re:way different lasers by BWJones · · Score: 5, Informative

      Mod parent up.

      Look. Many things can be made into weapons. In the case of lasers, it is never good to be looking into a laser beam of any wattage especially as the damage to your retina (likely the retinal pigment epithelium initially) may go undetected for years, but could establish a starting off point for macular degeneration. But like the parent said, pump it up 20X in power and you are starting to be able to cause some real damage immediately.

      --
      Visit Jonesblog and say hello.
    2. Re:way different lasers by voxlator · · Score: 5, Funny

      Look, it's not lasers that cause retinal pigment epithelium damage to people, it's people that cause retinal pigment epithelium damage to people.

      :o)

      --#voxlator

    3. Re:way different lasers by BWJones · · Score: 5, Informative

      Well, retinal degenerative diseases and remodeling is my forte, but I do recall that red lasers in the 3-5Mw range should cause no retinal damage per se. I qualify that because the long term studies have not been done, only short term studies to my knowledge. The thing you have to remember is that lasers are coherent light that "packs" much more energy into their beam than does say a 200 watt halogen lamp which throws its energy all over the place wasting about 90% of its energy as light. So, as I recall the threshold for damage is 10Xs the acceptable wattage for lasers assuming that people will guard by blinking when exposed to a bright light. (blink time being somewhere about 2/10ths of a second). So, the currently accepted wattage figures on the threshold of immediate tissue damage are in the 30-50Mw range. But you have to remember that the criteria are somewhat vague and no long term studies (to my knowledge) have been done as to the effects on the retina and RPE of brief exposures to low wattage laser light. I might suspect that you could increase your chances for having dry macular degeneration, but that is hazarding a guess.....Regardless, a good rule of thumb is to never stare into a bright light source. (oh, and always invest in good quality sunglasses).

      --
      Visit Jonesblog and say hello.
    4. Re:way different lasers by evilviper · · Score: 5, Informative
      Isn't there some minimal power below which you can blink faster than the laser can deposit enough energy to damage the retina?

      This is exactly how lasers are classified.

      You are refering to a Class II laser. It has the potential to cause damage to your eyes, but it is low enough power (and in the visible light range) so your blinking reflex will protect your eyes. Though, like looking into the sun, people can fight that reflex (usually children) and blind themselves.

      Class III lasers are the most dangerous ones, resulting in instant damage. I believe most if not all laser pointers are class 3 devices.

      Class I lasers are so low powered that you can look directly into them for a long period of time, and not cause any damage at all, as a result.
      --
      Slashdot gets worse every day... Pipedot: News for nerds, without the corporate slant
  2. Its all fun and games..... by Unloaded · · Score: 5, Funny

    ....till someone uses one of these as a cat toy...

    1. Re:Its all fun and games..... by SnapShot · · Score: 5, Funny

      Luckily, the use of a laser pointer as a cat toy is patented and therefore you are required to get a license before engaging in such an activity. A reasonably responsible corporate entity would never grant such a license. (God, I wish I was joking).

      --
      Waltz, nymph, for quick jigs vex Bud.
    2. Re:Its all fun and games..... by SnapShot · · Score: 5, Informative
      Some ignorant fucker accused me of being a troll... Here's the patent, my dear friend.


      United States Patent 5,443,036
      Amiss , et al. August 22, 1995
      Method of exercising a cat

      Abstract

      A method for inducing cats to exercise consists of directing a beam of invisible light produced by a hand-held laser apparatus onto the floor or wall or other opaque surface in the vicinity of the cat, then moving the laser so as to cause the bright pattern of light to move in an irregular way fascinating to cats, and to any other animal with a chase instinct.


      It looks like they've gotten more sophisticated.


      United States Patent 6,651,591
      Chelen November 25, 2003

      A pet toy and exerciser which produces an automatically movable, outwardly projected laser beam. The function thereof is to provide virtual "prey" for the stimulation and exercise of an animal. The device, which does not include a conventional motor, is small (e.g., can be handheld), lightweight, battery operated and silent, and has an extremely long potential cycle life. Electrically energized nitinol wires deflect a visible laser module to produce a virtual laser light target moved through three dimensions.
      --
      Waltz, nymph, for quick jigs vex Bud.
  3. Disclaimer, ie, don't sue us if you're dumb. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    This laser is not legal to use in public, and while we are not asking for any proof that the buyer is qualified to own this device, we trust that it will be used in a responsible fashion.

    Bwahahahahhahahhahahahaahah!

  4. OMG by LiquidCoooled · · Score: 5, Funny

    from the article/sales pitch
    - There is a 2 second delay after you click the "on" button before the laser will produce a beam.

    Click.
    Click.
    Click.
    (Peering into lens)
    Hey why isn't this worARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHH!

    --
    liqbase :: faster than paper
  5. Warning! by pegr · · Score: 5, Funny

    Warning! Do not look into laser with remaining eye!

    1. Re:Warning! by BLAG-blast · · Score: 5, Funny
      Warning! Do not look into laser with remaining eye!

      Recent safery changes will probably not discourage this:

      • - There is a 2 second delay after you click the "on" button before the laser will produce a beam.
      Somebody thinking, "Hmmmm, last I used one of these it came on straight away and I lost my right eye, this unit must have something wrong with thiARRHRHGHHHH, my eye!"

      --
      M0571y H@rml355.
  6. PLEASE! by af_robot · · Score: 5, Funny

    Any links where i can also buy some fricken sharks?!

  7. Obscure RPG Ref by BrynM · · Score: 5, Funny
    I can't get past Red clearance according to the beloved and benevolent Computer. After my last clone was killed by the room-blender-bot, the evidence of him not being a commie mutant traitor was destroyed. Red lasers for me until the next clone as I have to give my life to the needs of the Computer in a spectacular blaze of glory to redeem myslef... or volunteer to go outside for experiments! Eww!!! That fireball in the sky scares me. The Computer should have it destroyed!

    What do you mean I said too much?!?!? I'm not a traitor! I'm not a commie spy! Nooooooo...........

    --
    US Democracy:The best person for the job (among These pre-selected choices...)
    1. Re:Obscure RPG Ref by AvitarX · · Score: 5, Funny

      We will always remember you [Name deleted due to traitorous information dissemination] for your noble works and experiments in the [Region Deleted due to non-existance] with the big [object deleted] in the [object deleted].

      --
      Wow, sent an e-mail as suggested when clicking on "use classic" banner, and got a fast response that addressed my msg
  8. Re:What's a green security clearance? by hyphz · · Score: 5, Informative

    It's a joke based on an old classic RPG called Paranoia.

    Security codes were assigned based on the UV spectrum, with Infrared being the lowest, and Ultraviolet the highest. The clothing and similar worn by people had to match their colour (or Black for IR and White for UV).

    Lasers were the standard weapon in the game, and were coded according to the clearance of the firer. Reflective armor, protecting against lasers, was also coded by colour and couldn't protect against any laser of a shorter wavelength - so people had no protection of those of higher clearence than themselves.

  9. Are these really stories? by duckpoopy · · Score: 5, Insightful

    because they seem like advertisements...

    --
    word.
  10. Re:Uses and mods for this laser. by Danse · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yeah.. but it wouldn't be very good as a sniper rifle.. hard to get them to hold still for 30 seconds or so while you burn a hole through them...

    --
    It's not enough to bash in heads, you've got to bash in minds. - Captain Hammer
  11. Coming Soon: Laser TV by VernonNemitz · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Just need three lasers, red, blue (not yet widely available), and green, and means to switch their (big not needed!) output power to 256 levels very rapidly. Then a fairly simple arrangement of horizontal and vertical rotating mirrors can scan the flickering beams across, say, an ordinary home-movie projection screen, rather like we do with electron beams and electromagnets in a CRT. Somehow I think somebody somewhere has been working on this...but the lasers have so far been too expensive. But not much longer! Remember Blu-Ray? That diode laser is the last piece needed!

  12. Now here's a real laser - by slusich · · Score: 5, Informative

    http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&cate gory=25278&item=3862662804&rd=1

    Let's see what that does to a paper cup.

    --

    DeviantArt Page

    NSFW
  13. Re:What's a green security clearance? by bckrispi · · Score: 5, Funny

    Cizizen, would you mind explaining to me how you came about this information?

    --
    Xenon, where's my money? -Borno