Pfizer and Microsoft go after Viagra Spammers

Weird_Hock writes "This story from Reuters tells about the joint effort from Pfizer and Microsoft to go after illegal sellers of Viagra. Pfizer is going after the sellers and Microsoft after the spammers. Looks like they're targeting both sides of the money chain."

Comments

No Case

[fembots]

Spammers are selling V|agra you silly!

Microsoft should double-dip and file a parallel lawsuits against spammers who sell Full Version WinXP PRO for $35.

Re:No Case

[Jpunkroman]

Exactly, but i don't know what it would be good for since I don't have a pen1s. (I realize that this post could be taken entirely the wrong way)

Re:No Case

[Anonymous Coward]

Well, your post was taken the right way, but since there's no "-5, Extremely unfunny" moderation, the next best option was "0, Offtopic".

Stop taking the fun out of life!

[themaddone]

First they go after my music... then they go after my drugs...

But they'll never get my... my... ohmigod, what do I have left??

Re:Stop taking the fun out of life!

[flint]

Your rifle. Cause without Viagra your gun is useless.

"This is my rifle, this is my gun, this is for killing, this is for fun."

Re:Stop taking the fun out of life!

[panaceaa]

by lrwx (800141) * on Thursday February 10, @05:01PM (#11635451)
You still have sex! I guess if you are going with the sex, drugs, and rock and roll theme.

Howdy partner! Let me be the first to welcome you to Slashdot! Have a nice day!

There's a joke here

[the_Bionic_lemming]

{{{groan}}} How long until the first viagra/virus joke gets included? I mean really, Microsoft and Pfizer? It's like shooting fish in a con - I mean barrel...

Re:There's a joke here

[Anonymous Coward]

Lets not go about this half cocked. Microsoft and Pfizer will need to get a firm grip on the situation, and stroking big egos won't make the solution come any sooner.

Analysts..

[Anonymous Coward]

..are predicting a long, hard battle.

Re:Analysts..

[Anonymous Coward]

...with stiff penalties.

Re:Analysts..

[Rei]

This is a daily show episode in the making ;)

Re:Analysts..

[Anonymous Coward]

Don't for get "sustained".

Re:Analysts..

[WormholeFiend]

I hope that when Pfizer and Microsoft win, we can see footage of their CEOs dancing in the streets to the tune of Queen's "We Are The Champions".

Re:Analysts..

[AetherBurner]

From staid, upright lawyers...

Re:Analysts..

[Anonymous Coward]

Future headlines:

With the help of Pfizer, Microsoft hardens its stance against spammers.

Microsoft and Pfizer join forces -- can the release of "Longhorn" far off?

As always

[Rosco P. Coltrane]

Microsoft want to be the biggest dicks around...

Re:oh no!

[grub]

but then where will i get my illicit viagra that i so desparately need

Make sure you also buy Absorbine Jr. for when your arm gets sore.

How about castration???

[vudufixit]

To reduce aggregate demand for the stuff?

Just maybe...

[gammygator]

Maybe they'll come up with a product that keeps my servers up.

let the jokes begin!

[Maskirovka]

Time for the scumbags to bend over and feel the wrath!

Someone is gonna be in a world of hurt.

MS and pfizer are going to spread some love around.

There will be swelling in some lawyers'...pockets.

No carrots for the spammers. Just some bloated, throbbing, heavy-handed...sticks.

hmm

[GotSanity]

is it just me or does it seem like microsoft and pfizer are going to be mutualy beneficial out of this one. pfizer's profits get to go back up and microsoft gets a ton of viagra. That should make the programmers happy. :)

Re:hmm

[PedanticSpellingTrol]

Being both micro and soft, they could really use it too.

First draft of the press release:

[FunWithHeadlines]

Pfizer and Microsoft announced today that they had stiffened their resolve to go after sellers of counterfeit Viagra(r). They realized such spams were peaking, and they knew they had to harden the course for such counterfeiters.

"These guys think they can keep profits rising endlessly," complained a Pfizer spokesperson. "They are really beginning to poke us in the eye with their nonsense. We are a big company, and Viagra has helped up grow considerably. We won't let these crooks cut our profits off prematurely."

(Memo to editorial staff: Does the above sound right? Something seems a bit odd.)

Re:First draft of the press release:

[Anonymous Coward]

You forgot to work in mention of Microsoft's new product, code name "Longhorn".

Re:First draft of the press release:

[ralphclark]

Yes, but the "micro-soft" part of the name might put people off.

Vested interest?

[HardsetHead]

I suppose since no-one yet has made this crack...

I wonder if Microsoft has an ulterior motive in this whole crackdown.

Thank you. I'm here all week.

It's just a front:

[Morning $tar]

Pfizer is actually working on Longhorn with hopes of keeping it up longer and giving it that spine-tingling performance

I knew Bill was getting old...

[DarkMantle]

When I first read that I saw. "Microsoft goes after viagra"

Re:Why not go after the users?

[ThomasFlip]

Middle aged men who need pills to induce raging hard ons have enough problems as it is.

That's ironic...

[triffidsting]

Because of Microsoft, I can't get my box to come up, and because of Pfizer, I can't get... oh, nevermind.

With "LongHorn" coming out....

[jamesdood]

This should be no suprise. After all the name
"Short-limp horn" is not nearly as compelling!

And in other news....

[mikael]

... Microsoft announce that they are partnering with Pfizer to produce their own generic brand name of Viagra.

Critics point out that the first version of any product from Microsoft never stays up for long, and that users should wait for the second release, unless they are willing to accept permanent loss of data assets.

Merger

[http101]

In today's MarketWatch, software giant, Microsoft and Pfizer have formed a business alliance to combat spammers and illegal manufacture of Pfizer products. The new company name will be, "Macrohard".

I wonder ...

[A nonymous Coward]

...what kind of defense the spammers are erecting?

A killer combination...

[kbnielsen]

MicroSoft + Viagra + Penis Enlargement Pills == HugeHard

That doesn't sound good :)

At least they're not assholes...

[Anonymous Coward]

See, there's three kinds of people: dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along, and dicks just want to fuck all the time without thinking it through. But then you got your assholes, Chuck. And all the assholes want us to shit all over everything! So, pussies may get mad at dicks once in a while because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes, Chuck. And if they didn't fuck the assholes, you know what you'd get? You'd get your dick and your pussy all covered in shit!

Re:Shouldn't the headline really read:

[MightyMartian]

"Pfizer and Microsoft rise to the challenge."

"Pfizer and Microsoft erect barriers to Viagra spam."

"Pfizer and Microsoft have the balls to go after Viagra spammers."

OEM viagra

[Vivski]

Does this partnership between Microsoft and Pfizer mean I'll be able to get OEM Pfizer Viagra bundled with my WinXP Pro?

Simple

[obeythefist]

Microsoft's traditional embrace and extent methodology in practice.

1) Threaten spammers
2) Buy out or eliminate
3) Pick up the spamming technology and patents
4) Bundle with windows
5) CTRL-ALT-DEL to log on and would you like some V1@gR@ with that?

Obligatory lame Leno joke about Viagra

[Laconian]

Seriously, I can't separate that whiny lameass comedian from the word Viagra anymore.

JAY: Hey Kevin.. just read the newspaper..
KEVIN: What, Jay.. chortle, gahahaha..
JAY: and get this--true story!!--a train was derailed today--i'm not making this up here!
KEVIN: *laughs*
JAY: Apparently, Hillary Clinton Lewinsky Viagra William Hung Bush's Pretzel!!!
KEVIN: *laughs hysterically and strums a few nonsensical bass notes*