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Man Sells Baby to Pay for Gadgets

nzgeek writes "This guy seems to have a serious gadget addiction: 'we're selling our son for $30k. There's nothing sinister about this, he's not going into child slavery or anything, Randy and Linda just really liked his demeanor, and they're keen on a Kiwi kid because they're usually so healthy. I hear $30 grand is really good value these days. So help me out: what would be a good swag of gadgets to get hold of for US$30,000?' " This one definitely raises a lot of important questions. $30k is a lot of gadgets, so you must choose wisely!

19 of 335 comments (clear)

  1. Let me be the first to say by FidelCatsro · · Score: 5, Insightful

    If this is not an april fools joke i shall eat my mac

    --
    The only things certain in war are Propaganda and Death. You can never be sure which is which though
    1. Re:Let me be the first to say by BohKnower · · Score: 5, Funny

      And I shall eat my BigMac!!!

    2. Re:Let me be the first to say by LiquidCoooled · · Score: 5, Funny

      Mac mini is quite digestable now. Though I hear that eating Tiger fuzz gives you furrballs.

      --
      liqbase :: faster than paper
    3. Re:Let me be the first to say by bob670 · · Score: 5, Funny
      Hold on there pal, I'm from Apple's credit department, you still owe us the following...

      1. One arm, left or right, your choice
      2. One leg, again, your choice
      3. 1/5th of your immortal soul

      and you have not finished your KoolAid. When those task are complete you may commence eating your Mac. And good news, if you need to replace it, we know accept.....

      wait for it...

      .

      .

      .

      .

      .

      .

      .

      .

      .

      that's right, babies!!!!

    4. Re:Let me be the first to say by amberp · · Score: 5, Funny

      Don't eat your mac. Eat my PC instead and give me your mac.

    5. Re:Let me be the first to say by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      ... wow that was such a poor troll i think you gave me cancer

    6. Re:Let me be the first to say by xlcus · · Score: 5, Funny

      And drink your Google Gulp!

  2. Rumor has it... by gowen · · Score: 5, Funny

    ... that slashdot once ran an April Fools piece that was both funny and plausible. It was 1997, if I remember correctly.

    Of course, it's entirely possible that this recollection is a hoax, too.

    --
    Athletic Scholarships to universities make as much sense as academic scholarships to sports teams.
  3. SCO will dispute this. by LiquidCoooled · · Score: 5, Funny

    The kids mother is wanting to fight the case, but SCO are sure they are the father.

    --
    liqbase :: faster than paper
  4. A Calendar by Pond823 · · Score: 5, Funny

    with, like, special days marked on it.

  5. Re:Complete text of article in case of slashdottin by imperialstormtrooper · · Score: 5, Funny

    Why should he rule out slavery? The market value might be higher and you would deprive the child of some valuable life experiences and lessons....

  6. Re:it's a joke..right? by FidelCatsro · · Score: 5, Funny

    I hope its a joke since i just made a very public statment saying if it wasn't I would eat my mac , I know its small and everything but silicon is really hard to digest

    --
    The only things certain in war are Propaganda and Death. You can never be sure which is which though
  7. The real article? by NightWulf · · Score: 5, Funny

    A couple of months ago, I was approached with an interesting offer by an affluent company from California. After thinking carefully, we've decided to take them up on their offer. My fetish for gadgets is well puplicised through this blog, and I think this offer will help me finally get those gadgets I've been coveting for so long.

    That's right, i'm selling my popular newsite Slashdot for $30k. There's nothing sinister about this. The company really liked the website, and they said there wouldn't be as many repeats, dupes and Roland Piquepaille articles . I hear $30 grand is a really good number these days for this quality.

    So help me out: what would be a good swag of gadgets to get hold of for US$30,000? Here's my initial wish-list:

    * A dictionary to learn how to properly spell.

    * Some kind of anti-bias machine. Maybe Microsoft makes one.

    * An anti-duping machine.

    * A vaccine for my Apple Fever. And not the one that attacked my lower intestine that summer of 76.

    * Maybe a realdoll.

  8. Boom. by nzgeek · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Wow. Nice April fools joke on my hosting provider - the site lasted all of about 60 seconds after the article went public. I never expected this pretty lame joke to actually get posted.

    Here's a nicely formatted version of the article text (compared to that pretty poor effort above... thanks for the effort, but if you're going to repost the article text, perhaps at least remove the piles of whitespace mmkay?)

    A couple of months ago, my wife and I were approached with an interesting offer by an affluent couple from California. After thinking carefully, we've decided to take them up on their offer. My fetish for gadgets is well puplicised through this blog, and I think this offer will help me finally get those gadgets I've been coveting for so long.

    That's right, we're selling our son for $30k. There's nothing sinister about this, he's not going into child slavery or anything, Randy and Linda just really liked his demeanor, and they're keen on a Kiwi kid because they're usually so healthy. I hear $30 grand is a really good number these days.

    So help me out: what would be a good swag of gadgets to get hold of for US$30,000? Here's my initial wish-list:

    • A nice G4 Powerbook. I've always been a Windows guy, but only due to cost. I'm super-keen to try out a nice fast Mac.
    • A Mac mini for home. Our house is pretty small, and a mini would make an ideal home media server thing.
    • An Alienware PC gaming rig, or maybe a hand-built gaming machine.
    • A PSP and/or Nintendo DS.
    • One of those portable media players like the Mrobe or something.
  9. Penguins by PygmyShrew · · Score: 5, Funny

    But he who tux into penguin-meat gets tarballs.

    --
    I've had the theme tune to Quantum Leap going through my head all day... Now you have, too!
  10. Re:Complete text of article in case of slashdottin by SnapShot · · Score: 5, Funny

    Electronic Arts wasn't hiring! ;-)

    --
    Waltz, nymph, for quick jigs vex Bud.
  11. Re:Legality and April Fool by mpe · · Score: 5, Funny

    I don't know many countries that it is legal to sell your offsprings.

    Wonder if there's anywhere it is legal to sell your politicans. Not that most of them would raise much money.

  12. Interesting by TheFlu · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Isn't it usually the other way around: Man sells gadgets to pay for baby?

  13. I knew it by DJDutcher · · Score: 5, Funny

    It had to be a hoax cause if it was real his wife would have spent the money on a new bedroom set.