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Google Moves Into Drink Market
atrader42 writes "Google has announced on its main page a mysterious new product called "Google Gulp". Featuring qualities such as "autodrink" and brain optimization, Google Gulp promises to be the drink of the future. Although one may be concerned about the fine print, which includes provisions such as "Google Gulp will send packets of data related to your usage of this product from a wireless transmitter," we should be able to trust them on this. What's next? Yahoo Yoohoo? MSN Munchies?"
Murder should be legal if it serves the greater good. Discuss.
...how many "not another one!" comments this story recieves, it still beats work.
As a great april fools joke, how about when the NEXT dumb joke-story gets posted, all the trolls who would normally whine "BORING" or "STOP ALREADY" or whatever simply DON'T post anything?
THAT would be unexpected and hilarious!
I don't know the meaning of the word 'don't' - J
...is my birthday - do you think I'm going to be an April Fool with that story?
In Soviet Russia, Fools April YOU!
Today I almost find myself hoping for a Roland Piquepaille article, just to relieve the pace....
Cheers,
b&
All but God can prove this sentence true.
For years I've thought that ads above urinals and on the inside of stalls would be pure genius. But ads that were context sensitive to the types of foods/drinks that you were expelling while viewing said ads ... now that is true genius.
I was lucky enough to be a member of the Google Gulp Alpha Testing Team, and I can say that it made my penis larger by 10%. I was also irresistable to the female species (including small, female dogs and Homosexual Pelicans), and I had a bald friend who tried some and grew hair so thick that he looked like Josef Stalin. Things may have changed since going to Beta, however, so use at your own risk.
porp
Google is also supporting DRM Drink Rights Management with this new product. If you don't first swallow their brand name Blue Pill, then the gDrink renders your digestive system inoperable until you take it.
Saskboy's blog is good. 9 out of 10 dentists agree.
Not just MSN Munchies. Also, there's the all new Butter Toffee FAT Clusters. Available in 12, 16 and 32 bite sizes.
Additionally, Campbell's ammounced today that they are releasing a Unicode version of their famous Alphabet Soup.
Unknown host pong.
The beer industry has been on to this forever. When I drink beer I'm smater, cooler and have the moves to hit on chicks. The beer makers must have a feedback mechanism built into the product as they know what the chicks I want look like and how cool and how much smater I want to be... just watch the commercials.
"Academicians are more likely to share each other's toothbrush than each other's nomenclature."
Cohen
Not only that, they use the same FAQ to poke fun at the way they marketed Gmail :-)
7. How can I get my hands on a Google Gulp?
This "limited release" beta product is available to anyone who turns in a used Google Gulp bottle cap at any local retailer. If you don't have any Gulp caps, ask a friend to give you one.
8. What if none of my friends have a Gulp cap to give me? Can't you just give Google Gulp to anyone who wants it?
Well, we're thinking about it, but, um, you have to understand that there are many considerations which go into deciding how to distribute --
9. I mean, isn't this whole invite-only thing kind of bogus?
Dude, it's like you've never even heard of viral marketing.
You know, Microsoft's street address also says a lot about their mentality.
This clearly isn't an April Fools joke because I got one in the mail yesterday.
On a completely unrelated note, wouldn't you agree that it's better to take someting and run with it rather than just shout "I got the joke!"
xkcd.com - a webcomic of mathematics, love, and language.