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The Feasibility of Star Wars Tech
pwnage writes "Forbes Magazine, not usually the the web's premiere source of all things geekish, has posted an interesting summary of Star Wars technology and its scientific feasibility. As a bonus, they also include a great set of Star Flops, including the infamous Jedi Arena Atari 2600 video 'game.'"
The website is navagating automatically for me? What the hell?
It's not.
The Starwars Holiday Special!! featuring the happy family reunion of Chewbacca, wife Malla and son Lumpy(!!!!)
The Jedi Arena!! Two rectangles swinging sprites at an orange glob!!!
Christmas in the Stars!! featuring "What Can You Get a Wookiee for Christmas (When He Already Owns a Comb?)" and R2-D2 dishing out "We wish you a Merry Xmas"!!!
It all makes sense now!!!
But LUMPY!!! If I ever came up with a character name as "Lumpy", I would wilfully get eaten by a Dianoga!!
Rapid Nirvana
You've gotta be a speed reader to read each mini-article at the slideshow's default speed. What dope at Forbes decided how fast his readers should read?
That slideshow could make the Kessel run in less than 12 parsecs.
3D Printing Tips and Tricks at Zheng3.com
We're talking about Star Wars -- not Star Trek.
The dangers of knowledge trigger emotional distress in human beings.
"The combination of medieval chivalry and modern lethal technology is pretty ridiculous," in regards to lighsabers....umm it's call the force you geek poser! Now excuse me, mother has just yelled down here into the basement that the brownies are done.
Hello?? McFly?? Did you miss the first line of every single movie??
A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY...
It's already happened, thus it's feasability is already established.
you could kill them from orbit fairly easily with either SW or ST level technology.
Uh huh...And then I suppose you're going to tell me they could make a planetoid thing that can blow up other planets, too, right?
"In real history, gunpowder--or even good crossbows--pretty much put knights out of business."
And Ben Kenobi referred to laser beam swords weapons of a more civilized age.
I dunno, if blasters are supposed to be "more random", how come Jedis are still able to block their shots?
This makes as much sense as Chewbacca, a wookie, living with Ewoks on Endor.
Someone will come up with a non-slashdottable web server.
"Twenty miles . . . twenty miles . . . twenty miles. Eight thousand cube miles of rackspace, powered by fifty sub-atomic reactors, all designed to respond to the subconcious urges of the ancient Krell web-surfers."
Stefan
Man, Forbes must be desperate for readers to jump on the Star Wars bandwagon now.
Lightsabers are not lasers or simply light, they are directed concentrated energy fields that can cut better than a Ginsu knife.
A better reason for saying lightsabers are not feasible is due to the problems encountered when accidentally firing up one. Many Jedi and Sith limbs have been lost due to carelessness and showing off. Lightsaber safety is a serious issue, and people should not dismiss their potential dangers!
He who knows best knows how little he knows. - Thomas Jefferson
You're missing the point. It's an elegant weapon, from a more civilized age.
The U.S. could destroy the middle east from orbit, but they have troops in there fighting with simple hand held weapons. Sometimes you don't want to kill every one. It's bad PR. And who would pump your oil when you're done?
Just like Han Solo. Although he wasn't a Jedi, he was still DEFENDING himself! Oh, wait, nevermind....
What I want to know is: What kind of offspring do Kirk and the Green Woman have?
Except for the date, that is.
[Somewhere in space, ca 2400 AD]
"Captain, the screen reads Downloading...\|/-\|/-\|/-\|/ 37% # Connection aborted."
"Scotty, what happened down there?"
"Just a minor glitch. I'll have it repaired in about 2 hours."
"Sir, if I may interject. Sensors indicate that someone is war trekking in this part of the galaxy."
"So you're saying that someone else got the other 63% of that new guy in the red shirt? KHHAHHAHHAHHAHANN!"
"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid." Han Solo, outspoken skeptic of the Force
Find coupons in Greeley
The Star Wars program really is now needed for threats like N. Korea, rogue terrorists states, and the like. Under Reagan the SW program was deemed feasible, but was very expensive IIRC. Clearly advances over the past 15-20 years should allow for cheaper SW technology and maybe even the Dubba Death Star.
"Look Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a fat white guy who is threatened by change."
But only Imperial Stormtroopers are that preceise! According to Obi-Wan anyway. I wonder if Jedi get senile.
Wouldn't it be neat if there was a book about this? It could have stuff about planets, species and races, droids, even the Force! And it could be published in 1999!
Really. A slideshow. How nice.
[Fade into dream sequence]
"You are part of the Frontpage Alliance and a hack! *cough* *choke* *gasp* [web designer's corpse thrown to the floor] "Take him away!"
[Fade out of dream sequence]
*sigh* Back to work I guess.
I... don't know. But... it would... talk like... this!
That is all.
Or you could just shoot people with the very powerful laser..
Next question?
Is it safe to assume that you watch the space scenes with the sound muted for "authenticity"?
Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
"He pulls a knife you pull a gun, he sends one of yours to the hospital you send one of his to the morgue! That's the Chicago way."
I remember a cool science teacher in High School getting people to write papers on the science of Star Wars. Rather than do anything particularly scientific, I gathered all the fictional information I could find on the ion engines in TIE fighters. I did not do well.
Of course, ion engines do exist now. I want some marks back.
Also: Bob's Quick Guide to Its and It's.
Karma: Chameleon (Mostly affected by the 1980s)
I bet that in a vi vs emacs argument you would take the side of emacs then?
My freedom ends where someone else's begins
Any more than two, and they destroy each other.
What are they, goldfish?
Never quite go over this. However, the 1968 movie 2001 space odyssey, got it right!
;)
You betcha. Space sounds nothing like things zipping by with explosions and laser fire.
Rather, it sounds *exactly* like the Blue Danube.
In stereo.
i.e. Luke learned to whine in the wild. The tots probably were trained in the ancient Jedi skills of nagging to get what they wanted.
> The odd thing about Jedi using light sabers is that they don't bother
...)
> with blasters at all.
No, the odd thing is that they bother with light sabers. With the kind of prescience needed to pilot a pod racer and the kind of telekenesis that would be required to levitate an X-wing out of a bog, a Jedi master *ought* to be able to just walk through the middle of a blaster fight unscathed, pushing and pulling on the shooters' aim as necessary to avoid being hit. And, as Luke (a complete novice at the time) demonstrates with the little training droid ball, they ought to be able to do all that blindfolded. What do they need light sabers for?
(The answer is, of course, simple: they need light sabers for *image*. Light sabers are cool, impressive, intimidating,
Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.