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Stealth Sharks to Patrol the High Seas

dylanduck writes ""Imagine getting inside the mind of a shark: swimming silently through the ocean, sensing faint electrical fields, homing in on the trace of a scent." That's what the Pentagon wants to do, says New Scientist. By remotely guiding the sharks' movements using a newly designed neural implant, the military hope to transform the animals into stealth spies."

21 of 331 comments (clear)

  1. Lasers... by thesnarky1 · · Score: 4, Funny

    All the sharks need now is lasers, and we'll be all set!

    1. Re:Lasers... by pvt_medic · · Score: 3, Funny

      eh, you might have better luck with ill tempered mutant sea-bass

      --
      30% Troll, 50% Underrated, 10% Interesting
      Score:5, Troll
    2. Re:Lasers... by elrous0 · · Score: 2, Funny

      I actually built a laser to carve my name in giant letters on the moon once. Didn't work out, though. All I got was the "C" and part of the "H" before I was foiled. -Chairface

      --
      SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
  2. Wonderful by slavemowgli · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Ah, man: never encumbered by second thoughts about exploiting animals for warfare. Sometimes, I really think "homo arrogans" would be more appropriate (and often quite literally, actually) than "homo sapiens".

    --
    quidquid latine dictum sit altum videtur.
    1. Re:Wonderful by 4e617474 · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Ah, man:

      As opposed to the numerous other species you've known that make weighty moral decisions as they ponder their place in the world? Animals kept by humans experience a huge range of living conditions from the luxurious to the truly dreadful. Animals that people use for military purposes throughout histor have been by and large kept very, very well for a time than thrown into chaotic situations where they face dismemberment and death. The big change from living in the wild is the first part of that equation, not the second.
      I'll grant you that taking animals and vivisecting them because you need to look busy when you're grant's up for renewal is sick and wrong, but don't talk about how humans compare to animals as if turning the world over to the hyenas would bring about a Utopia.

      --
      Finally modding someone offtopic when they rant about what "Begging the Question" means: priceless.
    2. Re:Wonderful by Wyatt+Earp · · Score: 3, Informative

      Well actually, Man is encumbered by second thoughts about using animals for warfare, at least the United States has a clear record of caring for thier war animals, honoring thier deaths and caring for them.

      ""Thousands and thousands of dogs have given their lives for their handlers," said John Burnam, president of the Vietnam Dog Handlers Association and author of Dog Tags of Courage, a book detailing his experience as a handler in Vietnam. "They should be honored for their bravery and courage. A national memorial will honor all dogs in all wars."

      http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2002/07/07 25_020725_wardogs.html

      "One such hero pigeon, "President Wilson," died in June 1929. During the Meuse-Argonne offensive, "President Wilson" flew twenty-five miles in as many minutes under heavy machine gun and artillery fire with a shattered leg and a badly wounded breast.

      Found dead at the age of eleven, he was stuffed, mounted, and donated to the Smithsonian Institution.

      The last of the World War heroes, "Mocker," died at Monmouth in June 1937. Badly wounded, Mocker homed from the vicinity of Beaumont France on September 12, 1918 with a message giving the exact location of enemy heavy artillery batteries."

      http://www.monmouth.army.mil/monmessg/newmonmsg/se p022005/m35pigeons.htm

      http://www.spawar.navy.mil/sandiego/technology/mam mals/
      http://www.spawar.navy.mil/sandiego/technology/mam mals/veterinary.html

  3. Re:Tax Dollars by killjoe · · Score: 2, Funny

    Well god did give dominion over all animals to men. We can do whatever we want to them. We own them. God says so.

    --
    evil is as evil does
  4. This is what I want as an american. by Eric_Cartman_South_P · · Score: 4, Insightful

    As an American, I don't want lower taxes, better public transportation, or *gasp* national health care. No, I want to connect to sharks with VNC. What a fucking country.

    1. Re:This is what I want as an american. by Gulthek · · Score: 2, Insightful

      What are these benefits that only we Americans get, exactly? I think I missed that day in civics.

    2. Re:This is what I want as an american. by hutchike · · Score: 2, Funny

      Imagine there's no heaven,
      It's easy if you try,
      No hell below us,
      Above us only sky,
      Imagine all the people
      living for today...

      Imagine there's no countries,
      It isn't hard to do,
      Nothing to kill or die for,
      No religion too,
      Imagine all the people
      living life in peace...

      Imagine no possesions,
      I wonder if you can,
      No need for greed or hunger,
      A brotherhood of man,
      Imagine all the people
      Sharing all the world...

      You may say I'm a dreamer,
      but I'm not the only one,
      I hope some day you'll join us,
      And the world will live as one.

      --
      Zen tips: Pay attention. Don't take it personally. Believe nothing.
    3. Re:This is what I want as an american. by TheWickedKingJeremy · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Talk to the Canadians about how great national healthcare is...they love waiting 1-2 years for treatment.

      Is that what Bill O'Reilly told you they do?

      Look at the facts... Canada has a higher life expectancy (which is also rising at a faster rate) and lower infant mortality rate than the United States does. The United States has 40 million people without healthcare, and yet Americans spend a higher percentage of their income for healthcare than the Canadians do (because their system is so much more efficient than ours). Also, studies have shown that care received on both sides is more or less equal (assuming you have healtchare if you are American)...

      There are problems with Canada's system, no doubt, and yes I have read about the occasional horror story of Person X waiting Y time for Z procedure. But you could cherry-pick a horror story from here in the U.S. as well. That is not a good way to judge the merits and problems with a healthcare system as a whole. Look at the big picture... we spend more, for less. Simple as that.

      --

      my religion lies somewhere between buddhism and super monkey ball - pamphlet?
    4. Re:This is what I want as an american. by svelgen · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Further stats from a recent Economist article. The US is up to 16% of
      its GDP spent on health care in 2004 (more if you count the tax break
      US firms get for offering health care coverage to their employees).
      Canada spends just under 10% of its GDP on health care and gets better
      health outcomes (e.g. longevity). Of that 16% of GDP in the US, the
      government picks up over 6% for the elderly, poor and veterans (and pays
      inflated prices set by the "for profit" sector).

      Health care inflation outstrips the general inflation figure in almost
      all advanced countries. So every nation has a problem, the US just has
      a relatively bigger one.

      The US's neighbours and friends can sleep a little sounder at night
      knowing that if the US had an efficient health care system, it would
      have 6% more of its GDP to spend on foreign adventures.

      BTW There has been a spike in shark attacks on Australian beaches this
      summer. Could there be a connection?

    5. Re:This is what I want as an american. by Politburo · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I don't trust the govt to manage something that important

      Well, I don't trust corporations to manage something that important. Looks like we have a problem. Also, you don't trust the government with health care.. what about the military and other national security matters?

      Also, limiting the max awards (mostly punitive) on malpractice suits would help too.

      Nope. Where caps were put in place, there was no positive effect on the cost of malpractice insurance or medical care in general.

      "In states with caps, the median annual premium went up by 48.2%, but, surprisingly, in states without caps, the median annual premium increased at a slower clip--by 35.9%."

      "Do caps on medical malpractice damage awards hold down doctors' liability insurance premiums? The nation's largest medical malpractice insurer says they don't."

  5. As bizarre as it sounds ... by njchick · · Score: 2, Funny

    my gut feeling is telling me that Pentagon is more likely to succeed at making zombie sharks than NASA at launching three more shuttles this year.

  6. Re:Give me a break!!! by johnMG · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I guess it's just beyond most human beings intellectual capacity to just get a fucking clue. This ranks right up there with the rest of the dumb fucking things our military does with innocent animals.

    It's not *just* that people are dumb. They are. But they also don't *want* to know what they do to animals (or causes others to do to animals on their behalf).

    For example, offer to show someone a short video of what goes on in an abattoir. Almost guaranteed they will refuse. Tell them you don't think eating meat is wrong -- you just want them to see what goes on for them to be able to eat that McBurger. See if they'd be willing (not even "curious", just *willing*) to see how the fowl are slaughtered. They won't do it -- they will almost always prefer ignorance, and they'll probably also get mad at you for "trying to ruin their day".

  7. Re:Give me a break!!! by Nonillion · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I guess it's just beyond most human beings intellectual capacity to just get a fucking clue. This ranks right up there with the rest of the dumb fucking things our military does with innocent animals.
    It's not *just* that people are dumb. They are. But they also don't *want* to know what they do to animals (or causes others to do to animals on their behalf).
    For example, offer to show someone a short video of what goes on in an abattoir. Almost guaranteed they will refuse. Tell them you don't think eating meat is wrong -- you just want them to see what goes on for them to be able to eat that McBurger. See if they'd be willing (not even "curious", just *willing*) to see how the fowl are slaughtered. They won't do it -- they will almost always prefer ignorance, and they'll probably also get mad at you for "trying to ruin their day".

    I agree, 100%. You know, I used to eat animals, I was the kind of guy who would smack his fist down on the table and say "I got to have my slab of dead cow!" But, all that changed forever when I watched an undercover video showing some of the most deplorable acts violence committed against an innocent sow on a pig farm in North Carolina. These guys were yelling and screaming expletives at her, beating her with pipe wrenches and gate rods, sexually molesting her with a steel rod. And then to add insult to injury, smashed her over the head with a cinder block, it was then they started to skin and dismember her while she was still alive. It was the most disgusting thing I ever saw, it was extremely painful to watch. Chickens are treated even worse, and cows fair no better than pigs. And as for China, dogs are routinely strung up by their hind legs and beaten to death, cats are callously tossed into vats of scalding hot water while fully conscious.

    So I make no excuse for my disdain towards my fellow human beings let alone what our own fucking government does to animals.

    --
    "I bow to no man" - Riddick
  8. Re:Give me a break!!! by Hektor_Troy · · Score: 2, Funny

    Preach it brother, preach it. But it's not just animals.

    You know - I used to eat fruits, vegetables and the likes. Then one day I saw how people treat these living things. Cutting into them with knives, killing their offspring right next to them, eating their offspring before the plants themselves have even let go of them. Some would even abuse them sexually, I kid you not.

    So now I'm on day 17 of my refusal to not only eat anything from an animal, but also anything from a plant. So far it's going okay. I've lost a lot of weight, but that's obviously because of all the excess calories I got from eating animals and plants. Kinda feeling tired most of the time too, but I think that's becuse the animals and plants I ate made my body addicted to something. I just have to be strong and let it pass. Cold turkey! (No offence to the bird, of course)

    --
    We do not live in the 21st century. We live in the 20 second century.
  9. Ethical by Martin_2006 · · Score: 2, Insightful
    "That team is among a number of groups around the world that have gained ethical approval to develop implants that can monitor and influence the behaviour of animals, from sharks and tuna to rats and monkeys."

    Presumably the same body that granted ethical approval for that fine effort in Guantanamo Bay.

  10. next up... humans by humina · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I am familiar with this research project and turned down an opportunity to have worked on it. The thing is the pentagon wants to develop these shark brain implants so that they could one day be used in humans. Congress shut down the BMI section of darpa (brain machine Interface). It got renamed to something fluffy like neural interfaces research group. The whole purpose of it is to be able to implant a device in someones brain so that the pentagon can read a signal on what they are thinking. I would rather work for NIH on a brain implant to help restore neural activity for the disabled instead of making tools for war.

    --
    check out the best blog ever:
    http://oehlberg.com
  11. Sounds like Acoustic Kitty by guysmilee · · Score: 2, Informative
  12. Re:How 'bout an off button? by BecomingLumberg · · Score: 2, Funny
    I don't think any amount of programming can turn off the 'chompy' part of the shark. Much like Pac-Man, you can steer him around, but you can't keep him from eating everything in his path.

    I wonder if the new hacker rage will to be to boost a shark. That would make for some interesting vacations...

    --
    If a nation expects to be ignorant and free, in a state of civilization, it expects what never was and never will be.-TJ